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cxxiii.

Before Namjoon left, he pulled Yoongi out into the hallway to discuss something.

"It's about all of you, and it's about your mom," Namjoon said. They were outside the hospital room, and he cast a brief glance toward the window, but the blinds were drawn from the other side. "I didn't want to tell any of you this because I was afraid it would make you feel less wanted or something, but that's not true, okay? I'm telling you this upfront because..." He sighed. "I worry about you kids, and I worry that you aren't happy. And it's not that I don't miss all of you very very much, but if you're living with your mom, I don't want you to be miserable, okay? I just...maybe...maybe if you tried to understand her more..."

Yoongi nodded, waiting to see what his father had to tell him.

***

Their mom took the three of them home later that night, Yoongi silently fussing over Hobi by holding onto his arm and Jimin more vocally fussing over Hobi.

"W-Watch the s-step," Jimin said, eyes wide as he waited for Hobi to enter their house before him.

"I've lived here for years," Hobi said, rolling his eyes. "I know that there's an extra- ow ow ow," Hobi cut off, wincing after hitting his shin on the extra step that he always forgot about.

"Honey, be careful," their mom said, worried, and Hobi nodded before going in, Yoongi still holding onto his arm to guide him.

They'd taken a taxi home, as her husband had needed the car to do something business-related. That's all he ever seemed to do.

"After you, sweetie," their mom said, and Jimin nodded hesitantly, smiling before looking down guiltily and hurrying inside. He was confused now, about her, about their family. He'd always felt like she was the enemy, and maybe she was, but maybe she wasn't.

Could he forgive her?

Did he want to?

What did he win by holding on to his pain, his hatred? It only made life more difficult. Every day had been a battle of ignoring her or treating her harshly. If Jimin were to be honest with himself, being mean to other people hurt him, as well. He hated the feeling he got when he was mean. He felt cold, sharp, like a needle, ready to draw blood at any moment.

Wouldn't life be easier if he replaced his scowls with smiles, if instead of ignoring her, he asked how her day had gone?

If, when she said I love you, he said I love you back?

Even if it was hard? Even if he was still working on meaning it 100%?

But it was too much for Jimin to think about at the moment. He should just-

He stopped as he felt his mother's hands on his shoulders.

"I think he's in the kitchen," she said softly, hearing his voice filtering in from the other side of the house. "Maybe it would be best if you all stayed in your room, okay? I'll deal with him."

Jimin nodded before leaving her gentle grasp and following the others into their room.

The three sat on their beds, Jimin sitting next to Hobi on his, and waited in silence for one of them to say something.

"Give her a chance," Hobi said just as Yoongi said, "You need to eat something."

They paused, and it was up to Jimin to cast the deciding voice.

"W-Why?" he asked, and Hobi sighed.

"Because. Everybody deserves a chance to try. We all mess up sometimes. But she's trying to fix it. We should at least let her try, right? And besides, she's more or less trapped in another loveless marriage, and we're her only source of happiness." Hobi paused. "But don't tell her I said that."

"Dad told me..." Yoongi paused, unsure if he should share. He wanted to hang onto every reason he could to despise her, but it just kept getting harder. Finally, "Look, don't take this the wrong way, okay? But Jin was the only child they'd actually planned to have. The rest of us were accidents. But she didn't want to abort, so instead of raising one kid, she carried all of us to term and ended up with six. So it wasn't like she wanted six kids and suddenly didn't want them. She was just surprised with five extra kids, and the stress was a lot to take." Yoongi frowned. "It sounds like I'm defending her. I'm not. I don't want to."

"That's okay," Hobi said softly. "You don't have to change your mind all at once. You don't even have to decide on one thing. Nobody's forcing you to choose. It's okay to be confused."

"I just..." Yoongi frowned at the bed sheets. "She could have aborted us, you know? She could have just said, No, I don't want that child, and then bam, we wouldn't even exist. But she kept us. Even though she wasn't ready to." Yoongi inhaled through his nose. "I don't know," he repeated. "It's just hard to think about."

"W-W-Wait," Jimin said, and they both turned to look at him, Yoongi sighing as he waited to hear some emotional rambling from Jimin about his feelings or whatever.

"I-I'm an accident?"

***

They were all seated around the kitchen table half an hour later.

"So, boys," their mom began, standing behind her husband's chair but not touching him. "Your father has a dinner banquet for his business Thursday night, and families are welcome, so we're all going to go as a family, all right?"

Yoongi frowned. "Hobi isn't well en-"

"I'm fine," Hobi said quickly. "It sounds fun."

Their mom smiled tightly at Hobi, grateful for a show of support in the room. "Good. And I shouldn't have to tell you boys because you're old enough by now, but you need to be on your best behavior, all right? A lot of important businessmen will be there, and it's important to make a good impression."

"Which means," their step-dad cut in, and his wife stiffened. "No swearing. You'll be wearing formal attire, so you need to conduct yourselves professionally. Hoseok, you cannot be seen throwing up in the public bathroom. If for some reason you find yourself sick, there's a private bathroom on the second floor that you can use, but you aren't to make your illness a public manner. As for you, Jimin, you are to remain silent. Your brothers will speak for you. If anyone asks, you lost your voice as a result of a cold earlier this week."

The boys stared at him.

"You can't be serious," Yoongi cut in, angry on behalf of his two brothers.

Then Jimin spoke. "R-Right, hyung? N-no s-swearing!"

Hobi cracked a smile at Jimin's joke since Jimin was the least likely of the three of them to even say crap, but their step-dad didn't find it half as funny.

"I am extremely serious. If people find out about Hoseok's health condition or Jimin's speech impediment, it will reflect poorly on myself and my business. Do you understand?"

Yoongi wanted to ask why it mattered to them what happened to him or his business, but he was afraid enough of their step-dad that he didn't want to find out.

"Dear," their mom said, sounding a bit strained, and Yoongi noticed that she looked nervous. It made sense to him; he hadn't ever heard her speak up to him before. "Don't you think that's a bit harsh? They're just boys. Telling them to be silent-"

"Enough," he cut her off sharply. "I've made myself clear."

"But why make them go if they're just going to be miserable-"

"Enough. We'll settle this later."

She swallowed. "Why don't you boys go back to your room, and your father and I will talk about it, all right?"

Jimin and the others hurriedly got up and left, and as they laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, the house echoed with strained yells.

***

The next morning, they followed their usual schedule, Hobi waking the two up, but when he went to take a shower, the bathroom was already occupied.

He knocked on the door hesitantly. "Is someone in there?"

"Oh, sorry, Hobi," their mom's voice came from the other side of the door. "I just need to finish putting on makeup."

"All right," Hobi said, and he went back to their room to wait.

"She's putting on makeup or something," he said, sitting down on his bed, and Yoongi rolled his eyes.

"Girls. Like anyone's going to notice their mascara anyway."

They waited in silence until they heard the sound of the bathroom lock being turned, and Yoongi darted out of bed before Hobi, moving surprisingly quickly for someone who despised mornings, and he got to the bathroom just as the door opened.

She looked startled to see Yoongi but quickly recovered. "Good morning, Yoongi."

Yoongi frowned, staring at her face. "You look exactly the same as always. This is why I think makeup is stupid."

"Oh," she said, swallowing. "I see...I suppose it is sort of silly...Well..." She stepped out of the bathroom. "The shower is all-"

But Yoongi was already inside, and the door had already shut.

"-yours."

***

Jin suddenly found life ten times harder.

Now that Yoongi had made him aware, he realized how little time he actually spent with his family. He was constantly replying to phone notifications from people he didn't even care about, and yet he didn't even know if Jungkook or Tae were in any clubs.

Just then, another notification flitted across his screen, and Jin sighed before opening it, ready to tell them off before blocking the number.

***

Unknown

thanks for talking to Jimin

idk what you said but it worked i guess

he and hyungwon are talking again

so thanks.

sorry i yelled at you.

Jinsideout

jooheon?





updates will probably be less frequent but longer chapters

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