“Evan?”

“Yeah?” the youngest answers from his desk. A smile was spread across his face as his eyes focused on the computer screen in front of him.

“Why does stuff like this always happen to me?”

His attention fell to his partner who was sitting on the bed they shared every night. Johnathan was discharged from the hospital the day after the surgery, but was put on bed rest; nothing new to him. Now his foot was wrapped up in gauze and in an ankle stirrup propped on top of a pillow for some comfort. His crutches - which he hated - leaned up against the bed beside him. The sky sharp crystals that made up his eyes starred unforgiving holes into the two things that have been giving him a hard time lately.

Evan pushed back in his seat and made his way to his troubled lover. His hand gently cupped Johnathan’s chin lifting it up so their eyes could meet. This view was nothing new to him. Countless times he has looked down at Johnathan when he felt his whole world coming down. It was heart breaking. “Because you never had legs before. The doctor said physical therapy will help you a lot. I’ll be there to support you every second.”

That plan didn’t settle well in Johnathan’s stomach. The whole reason he was in this situation was because he met a stranger and wasn’t ready for it. Now he had to meet someone completely new to the both of them. Every alert system in his body was going off to just stay in bed for the rest of his land dweller life.

In their bedroom pinned to the wall was a cat calendar Evan got from a friend a while ago. The Asian marked the little milestones the other had accomplished since they started their own little home walking therapy. Currently on the page of August, which had an adorable calico with big blue eyes holding a ball of yarn between its tiny little paws, was a date marked in red ink; the day he will meet with his therapist.

It was three days away and each morning when he woke up he turned his head to check the date from across the room. Each night when Evan would wrap his arm around his waist and bury his face in the crook of his neck he could feel his anxiety rise until he fell asleep.

Each day he came up with excuses to avoid going, but once the dreadful day rose like any other he lost them deep inside his mind. He lost them when Evan prepared him a big healthy meal to boost his spirits. He lost them when they walked outside a cool breeze greeting them as they got into Evan’s car. His mind was blank on the drive to the building. Then when they sat in the waiting room with Evan holding his hand Johnathan just starred at the floor as all his confidence left.

When he heard someone approaching closer his heart pounded against his rib cage. The grip he had on his partner’s hand became borderline strangling. His head lifted up to see just who was there to greet them. From the beginning Johnathan pictured his trainer to be some heavy set guy with a mean Atlantic Wolffish like face. The guy standing in front of him was different.

His new trainer was indeed built, toned, and very strong looking, but wore a friendly smile with perfectly straight white teeth. Caramel brown hair was shaved down to a buzz on the sides of his head as the top stayed fairly long and combed over to the side. A face of short facial hair complimented his well-kept style although it did have a reddish tone to it giving Johnathan some faint memories of someone he use to know.

“Hello there! You must be Johnathan, right? My name is Brian and I will be your personal trainer for a while,” the stranger, Brian, greeted him brightly. His hand reached out for a friendly handshake.

Right away Johnathan could tell he was not original from here. His accent was smooth like an anemone swaying along with the water. Something about it did irk a part of his brain though. Years ago when he was just a young little mermaid he was traveling with his family to the northern part of the Atlantic where the red tails mainly ruled. It was more of a business trip, but since Johnathan was so young he only remembered playing with a kid that was older than him.

His mind snapped back to reality when he heard Evan introduce himself to the trainer.

“Hey! Yes, this is Johnathan. He’s nervous so please excuse him. My name is Evan I’m his…um...I’m his boyfriend,” the Asian took Brian’s almost neglected handshake and shook firmly as he smiled. A light blush was tinting his tan cheeks and Johnathan knew exactly why.

They never verbally confirmed that they were dating. When they had their first kiss everything just fell into place. It was like that night and moment was their silent proposal to be more than friends.

Brian’s smile grew even more at the other man’s respond, “That’s wonderful to hear! I’m happy you two have each other and don’t worry I get nervous patients all the time. He’s in good hands here.”

His pale blue eyes fell onto Johnathan and the anxiety that left for a brief moment came back. Then he felt Evan’s sweet earthly eyes on him. Automatically the comfort that always followed with his favorite human drained some of his nervousness inside.

The oldest looked to his side where Evan sat beside him and gave a pleading expression that read he didn’t like this at all. As loving as his partner was he took his lover’s hand and rubbed his thumb over his knuckles. “You’ll be fine. The people here have my number so if anything happens they will call me and I’ll come back as fast as I can.”

“Wait, you’re not staying here?” Johnathan started to panic, his breathing picking up as he held onto the other’s hand tightly. His body was beginning to quiver like it did the first second he was left alone with Tyler.

The look in Evan’s eyes already told him that he hasn’t forgotten that real nightmare, but this had to happen. His other hand came up to cup Johnathan’s borderline trembling cheek. The touch was so gently and warm if it wasn’t for being in a foreign public environment the oldest would melt.

“You’re going to be fine. Trust me, ok? Remember to breathe and take it easy. I’ll be back before you even finish,” his voice was soft to match his smile and touch.

The ex-mermaid swallowed hard before he took a deep breath in, held it for a few seconds, and let it out slowly. He wasn’t completely calm, but it was enough for him to stand with Evan’s help. A tight hug was given between the lovers then a kiss to the cheek from the youngest. A few whispered words of encouragement then Evan walked out of the door with faith in his partner.

Now Johnathan was with another stranger once again. He couldn’t think of that though. For Evan and his own sake he would think more positive through this new journey. If he didn’t things would just get worse.

From be hide he could hear his trainer cough lightly into his fist to get his attention. Johnathan, with the little courage Evan gave him, turned around to meet with the man eye to eye. His smile was still bright and gentle like during their one-sided introduction. Brian held out the partially immobilized man’s crutches who took them gladly to get the pressure off of his wounded foot.

“Since we’re not going to do any therapy until your cast comes off I’m going to give you the grand tour of the place today. If you have any questions please do feel free to ask me. I want this please to be like your second home for the time you’re here,” the therapist explained.

A second home. For a while, when he was still a mystical mermaid, Evan was his second home. Now he was confused at what exactly what was what. Back home in the deep blue sea he was looked down upon for his actions with a human and was even locked away. He was no longer a part of them, literally. Even if he wanted that life back he didn’t know how to reverse what happened to him. Yet it was safe to say that Evan was his forever home now.

Johnathan nodded his head in understanding as he leaned on his uncomfortable crutches. He pondered shortly on the first question that popped into his head when his trainer first spoke until said man gave an expression that read he already knew.

Brian stood up straight and stuffed his hands into the pockets of his sweat pants, “You want to know where I’m from, don’t you?” Johnathan nodded again, but a bit bashful this time. “It’s alright I get asked that all the time. Can’t really hide it, right?” he gave a little chuckle while the other in front of him stood waiting, “I’m from Ireland. Born and raised in the heart of Dublin. It is such a beautiful place. Maybe one day, if you guys can, you and your boyfriend should go visit there,” he babbled a bit, a glint to his eyes.

Little did he know Johnathan visited there long ago and long ago he left his best friend. Maybe if Evan wants to they can go and search for his long lost friend. It was wishful thinking at least. Without waiting for some response Brian spun around on his heels and beckoned Johnathan to follow with a flick of his finger.

The first stop of the tour was at the front desk. Johnathan had already met the kind women sitting be hide the half circle desk when Evan signed him in to note Johnathan indeed came today. She was a petite women with dirty blonde hair tied up into a bun on top of her head. Her smile that seemed to never fade was small with two lips painted in a dark red. To say her eyes were just hazel was an understatement. They were bright like the rising sun reflecting off the fresh dew coating the grass. The same sun that spreads a soothing burn to your skin when exposed to it. She had a glow to her that was safe.

“This is Alina, our receptionist. Every day when you come in you’ll sign your name, the date, time, and your trainer, which is moi, on the sign in sheet,” Brian informed putting a hand over his chest as he referred to himself.

Alina scuffed lightly as she rolled her eyes playfully at the Irish man. “I already told him and his boyfriend what to do up here. Unlike your lazy ass I do my job,” she took her eyes away from her computer to give Brian a teasing smile.

With his hand still planted on his chest Brian moved it over his heart and gave an offended frown. He gasped dramatically receiving another eye roll from the receptionist. “Lazy? I’ll have you know when you’re sitting on your ass playing Solitary I am back there helping people recover from many different injuries.”

The women giggled at her co-workers little show. It was as if the rays of her eyes had touched Johnathan’s soul. Then her golden gaze fell to the wounded man. Right then he noted that she was a very trusting human.

“Don’t worry. You’re in good hands with him. Everyone that has worked with him said their recovery was sweet and clean. I was just pulling fun with him,” Alina reassured with a gentle smile.

Johnathan nodded slowly as he loosened his grip on his crutches which were tight without him noticing. Her words eased the shakiness filling inside of his body. Brian held a proud smile while his hands firmly planted on his hips. He seemed very pleased with himself and it almost made Johnathan smile. Almost.

“Thank you very much, Alina. Once I’m done showing him around I will be coming back to record you saying that again,” the Irish man was beyond having fun with this, but at last there was still a job to be down.

He gently put his hand on Johnathan’s back to escort him down the hallway past the front desk. Although, when he felt how tense his client got under his touch he took his hand away quickly and simply lead the way. Johnathan was thankful of the other’s silent recognition of how uncomfortable that was. Alina waved goodbye to him so he gave his own little wave in reply. Then he stood off his bad foot and crutched his way be hide his trainer.

Down the hall were three doors before it forked to the right and left. One of the doors was a family restroom for patients and others to use while they wait. Another door was a custodial closet, whatever that was. Johnathan just knew it was for employees only. The last door before the hallway took two opposite turns was another restroom, but like the closet this was for employees only.

Once the two made it to the break off Johnathan saw more doors to the left. Some of the doors were opened or a bit ajar. A Faded conversation could be heard at one of the doors. Brian crossed his muscular arms against his chest as he watched his patient’s face.

“These are therapy rooms. Once a week you and I will talk in my office to discuss progress and other important matters. Come on I’ll show you,” he explained then walked off toward the third door on the left.

Johnathan kept up as much as he could on these metal contraptions from Hade’s dreams. Thankfully Brian waited patiently outside of his office door with it wide open. The same gentle smile was stretched across his face.

Inside the square room was an L shaped desk facing two cushioned chairs with a foot rest in front of one of them. Johnathan made his way to that seat and sat down happy to give his armpits a rest. He propped his foot up on the ottoman which felt way better than a pillow he uses back at home.

His stomach tightened at the word. The realization that he wasn’t in his comfort zone or even near Evan was causing his anxiety to act up again. Instead of suffering through another attack he looked around the room to distract himself as he took deep breathes like Evan told him to.

There was two printed artworks of Blue-Eyed-Grasses on either side of the door each were perfectly aligned. Johnathan’s eyes wandered to the furthest wall that was be hide the desk. Neatly framed and nailed to the wall was a map of the world. It looked very old and worn with its pale cream color and faded outline. The biggest part his eyes couldn’t look away from was the water. All the faded royal color taking up most of the world they lived on.

For the first time since his mysterious issue Johnathan felt homesick. He missed seeing all of the vibrant colors of coral and the fishes that swam around them. He missed how smooth he moved against the currents. He missed his hammock where he relaxed on sunny days and let his mind wonder. He missed his sister – his only family – even though her curiosity and lack of trust got him in trouble. She was just worried for her brother. He didn’t belong here. The surface was not for him and the world was giving him painful hints at the irregular balance.

But did he belong in the sea anymore? They practically made him an outcast; a disgrace to their kind. He would have been banished or shamed after they were down putting him back in line. The only person to accept and care for him was Evan.

As his mind wandered too deep Brian shut the door gently and made his way to his DX Racer chair. When he took a seat in the comfortable chair his fingers tapped on the end of the arm rests as he let Johnathan take the place in. He noticed the other was glued to the map above his head so he spun around to admire it like he always did. A pleasant smile spread from cheek to cheek while he took the sight of it in.

“Nice, isn’t it? I got it at some old store in town. Thought it would look good in here,” Brian explained with a proud expression. He spun back around in his chair to be met with sharp blue eyes staring at him.

It took a second for Johnathan to come back to his senses before he looked away shyly. Deep down he hoped Brian wasn’t able to read his thoughts. If by the rare down side he could he hid it well.

“Eh,” the Irish man shrugged and slumped back into his seat, “I like traveling and seeing as much as I can. There’s so much out there. That’s my goal before my time on Earth comes to an end; to explore all that I can. Do you have a goal, Johnathan?”

The man being questioned meet the other’s eyes again in confusion. His eyebrows knitted together as he thought about what kind of goal he had in life. There was only a simple answer to that as it was the only thing coming up.

“To walk normally.”

Brian nodded as his lips stretched down in an understanding matter. Even though that was a good goal to have it wasn’t the one he wanted. His new patient would of course be more shut in since they were only strangers, but a few walls had to come down between them for this therapy to go smoothly. He scratched the scruff on his jawline idly as he read Johnathan’s body language.

“That is a very good goal to have, but what about something that is more, uh, difficult? Recovery will have a challenge, but I can tell there’s something bigger in mind with you. Perhaps it has something to do with the map?” Brian questioned more with a hand gesturing to the old frame be hide him.

Johnathan held his arms close his body to feel more protected. He felt like he was in the spotlight where he never wanted to be even if he was the only one here to witness. This was for the best though. This man sitting across the room from him was the key to a better life with Evan. When he’s fully healed and able to use these damn feet he won’t take a second look at this place ever again. For now – for the freedom he’ll achieve soon – he will sit here and be questioned.

The oldest took a deep breath in and let it out through his nose slowly. His baby blue eyes went back to the map looking to where he knew what use to be home. There wasn’t any sort of goal there so he glanced to land where he estimated where they were. Evan’s love has always been a goal and now that they were closer than ever he couldn’t call it a goal anymore. To say Johnathan was puzzled on this was just putting it mildly. Nothing was a goal except being able to walk. There was nothing on that map for him.

Then it clicked. Something buried inside of him was rising. It made his chest feel heavy as the truth lingered up to his brain. For a long time – before he even met his soulmate – this goal of his was there. He only just dug it deep and left it to rot years ago.

“To find my place in this world,” he answered although mostly telling himself this.

His arms dropped into his lap sluggishly as a small part of the many walls he had put up crumbled down with them. Brian looked taken aback with his wide bright eyes. This response was much deeper than he expected. He only thought Johnathan wanted to travel too, but it was so much more. Carefully he watched the frown along the other’s face. This was also a surprise to his patient which only made Brian wonder more about what those protective walls were holding back. To find that out was for another day.

The trainer adjusted in his seat to sit up straight and face fully towards Johnathan. His hands were firmly held on top of his desk before he broke the silence in a calming voice, “That is a very difficult goal to have. Some people find their purpose early while some are just happy where they are right now. In the end we all find our place on Earth which means you will too.”

Johnathan put his head down finding his fingers way more interesting than this empty pit in his chest. He nodded slowly like he had in the waiting room multiple times while internally finding ways to fix his fragile fortress. Brian had other plans though. Not only was he Johnathan’s physical therapist, but he wanted to be someone he could trust and open up to. He wanted to be an open ear to Johnathan or to make his mind less foggy.

He stood up from his chair and watched Johnathan peek at him in thought. The Irish man strutted his way over to his client being mindful of his foot and crutches. His hands held the older man’s shoulders and the tense muscles jumped underneath at the contact. Brian didn’t let up like last time. Instead he waited for fearful cautious eyes to look up at him. He smiled hoping it would ease some of the tension (it didn’t).

“Johnathan, I can tell you’re troubled by this and I want you to know that it is a hundred percent alright. It means finding your place is important to you, but remember you don’t have to go through this journey alone. Earlier today I could see how loving you and your boyfriend are. I know he wants to help you just as much as you want to help yourself. Your friends and family can help too. No one is alone in this world. Take all the help you need and don’t be shy to ask for it. Hell I could give you a lending hand if you want. I’m not just here to fix your foot. I can be a friend.”

The oldest sat back surprised as he was looking up at this complete stranger who had sincere hope for his success and even considered the thought of him being a friend. Tears were threatening to pool at his water line, but he blinked them back. There was no time for that. Brian had a deep warm feeling to him now that was almost like Alina’s but not as sunny. His feeling was more humble like a warm blanket. This was someone else his old childhood tales forgot to mention; a friendly human. He mentally noted Brian could be trusted to an extent.

With a little bit of his will Johnathan gave a smile although it was small and slightly timid. “Thank you. That actually means a lot to me,” his voice was soft to match his shyness.

Brian smiled much bigger taking Johnathan’s smile as a huge step in the right direction. His hands let up on the man’s shoulders with a little reassuring squeeze. The Irish man stepped back out of his comfort zone, the smile never fading and neither did his patient’s.

“Alright, enough with the sappy, deep, shit for now.  I still have to show you the gym.”

And so he did. After handing Johnathan his crutches Brian guided him to the other wing in the building. There were two glass doors before entering the activity room. From the hallway they could hear muffled music coming from a radio. It was music the oldest was still not familiar with. Humans had very different and sometimes harsh music he didn’t understand. Brian held one of the doors open for him and he crutched his way inside with a little bit of eagerness.

The room was very big with wood flooring reflecting the bright lights above and some black mats placed in certain spots. Windows were also placed on the walls so the sun could filter some nature light into the place. Together the two walked in and weaved their way through different exercising equipment that left Johnathan baffled. Brian was kind enough to explain them all and what their function was. He was calm and informed Johnathan on everything here as simple and slow as he can. A little part of his brain found it funny how the oldest had never been to a gym or seen workout machines.

Most things in here Johnathan was not going to use as told by his physical trainer. All they would work on was his feet and balance which was done in one of the far corners in the room. Everything looked very complexed to Johnathan, but by the way Brian was talking it was as if he was meant to do this.

____________

When all of the questions – which were very simple – were answered the two went back to the waiting room. Off the bat Johnathan looked to his right to see if Alina was still there which she was. He nodded hello to her and she was happy to return the gesture with a wave of her hand.

Evan was sitting down in the chair he sat in when he dropped Johnathan off playing a game on his phone. The sound of the crutches made him look up with a big smile he always wore when he looked at his lover. He stood up and took the other into his arms who quickly wrapped his arms around his shoulders as they hugged. It was a fresh of breath air Johnathan needed.

Brian came over once the hug was done and informed the Asian that his boyfriend was given the grand tour and seemed just the slightest interested to start once his cast comes off. Johnathan gave a one sided shrug at the comment which only Evan noticed it. Brian shook Evan’s hand in goodbye then gave Johnathan a light pat on his shoulder for until next time. The lovers left through the door, hopped in the car, and made their way back home.

“So how did you like it? Did everything go well?” Evan asked eagerly happy to see Johnathan wasn’t as scared looking now.

The oldest slumped in his seat and huffed as he looked down at his wrapped up foot. Even though his mood did lighten up at the end he was still anxious about the whole thing.

“It was alright. You never told me I would have to sit and talk with him though. I thought I was just going to do exercises with my foot and be done,” Johnathan kept his eyes down.

He could hear the other chuckle with amusement as he turned left onto their road. “Of course you’re going to talk. If you’re stressed or problems are happening you need to tell him. If you don’t talk about how your body and mind are feeling then he can’t help you right. Don’t worry he seems like a really nice guy,” Evan took a quick glance to see his lover pouting, “Put that frown away. You looked fine when you got out.”

“Yeah, because I got to see you again. I don’t like being away from you for too long,” Johnathan pouted even more as he mumbled.

Evan chuckled again and his cheerfulness became contagious. When they pulled into the driveway the Asian shut the car off and got out to make his way around to assist Johnathan with getting out. He was smiling from ear to ear now so Evan took his chance and planted a small kiss to his soft lips. The taste of sea salt on him had finally filtered out.

“I bought pizza before I came to get you. I was thinking we could chill and watch some movies. You’re probably exhausted,” Evan suggested as he pinched his boyfriend’s cheek gently. Johnathan was too dazed by their kiss to swat his hand away.

“You have no idea. My arms hurt,” he replied then went to the front door alongside Evan with his keys ready.

The pizza was still hot and fresh on the kitchen counter once they got inside. Johnathan sat on the couch and put his foot up on the coffee table with a sigh of relief. He couldn’t wait until he didn’t need the crutches anymore. Evan came in with two plates of hot pizza goodness and handed Johnathan his. The youngest plotted himself down against his lover and turned Netflix on so they could begin their movie marathon.

______________

When the blue screen of an inactive TV screen woke Evan up he felt the weight that was pressing against his right side. He looked down to see Johnathan sleeping soundlessly and cuddling into his side. A smile painted across the youngest man’s face as he carefully stood up despite being wobbly with sleep and scooped his partner into his arms. The sleeping man shifted comfortable in his arms then relaxed.

Evan would never get tired of him when he was like this. He looked so peaceful and content with his life and that’s all he wanted for his lover. He made his way up the stairs and into their bedroom. Their. It was so bittersweet to call it that. They have been sharing this bed for three months now and he never wanted to go back to it only occupied by himself.

Gently he laid Johnathan down making sure his damaged foot wouldn’t bump into the other and cause unwanted pain in the middle of the night. Evan slid in right next to him too lazy to shed his clothes and put his pajamas on. Right now he just wanted to sleep with his lover, his boyfriend. His arm pulled Johnathan closer until their breaths were getting mixed together.

For a few minutes Evan watched the man sleep next to him. His cheek was pressed against the pillow making his lips spread open a little. His chest rose and fell as dreams danced inside his head. Everything that has happened was forgotten at moments like this. Moments of pure innocents held a special spot in Evan’s heart; the heart that was rightfully Johnathan’s.

Soon after fighting the sleep his body needed he kissed Johnathan’s forehead as gentle as he could to not disturb his slumber then closed his eyes and fell asleep with his favorite person in the whole world wrapped up in his arms.