TW :: blood, death.

with trembling fingers, wooyoung lets the music play, the first seconds of the quiet instrumental echoing into the studio.

he exhales a breath, long and slightly shaky, his eyes hesitantly fluttering shut. and, though it takes him a few moments, wooyoung shortly finds the courage to move, his limbs swaying freely to the nostalgic melody whispering into his ears.

as the beat of the song gradually begins to quicken, so does wooyoung's movements, along with the race of his heart, the pace of his breath and, most prominently, the images in his head.

it's almost like he's witnessing the scene all over again, the memories from that day, which he usually knows better than to let out of the safety that is the very back of his mind, taking advantage of every one of his senses. the petrified instincts of the screams, the sounds of shattering glass shards, the horrifying sight of blood pooling out of its lifeless owner — wooyoung dances through the reminder of it all.

however, there's only so much his torn heart can take.

he soon stumbles over his own feet, collapsing onto the ground with a pained yelp.

body stationary, wooyoung's cheeks tickle at the tears that somehow escape his eyes against his will. sighing defeatedly, he brings his hands up to wipe away his stained features, before crawling over to his belongings.

pausing the song, wooyoung downs a long chug of his water, back pressed against the wall with his knees to his chest, before clutching onto his phone. the light of the screen illuminates his features, only emphasising his splotchy appearance.

###

me
update: it didn't work

kev
oh woo ://
i can come down if u want??

me
please
seen

###

staring up at the ceiling, avoiding the blinding yellows and whites of the lights, wooyoung picks at his nails.

he thought he was getting there, he really did and he really wanted to, but it's no use. he's been trying so hard, so hard to draw a clear line between his one passion and him, that wooyoung may as well just give up, now. because what is the point? he isn't getting better like everyone says he will, and obviously so. perhaps he deserves it for what he did.

causing wooyoung's heart to stop for a split-second, the door to the dance studio abruptly crashes open. footsteps squeak against the wooden floor — the sound bothersome — as they rush towards him, a pair of arms finding his shoulders only a few seconds after.

"hi," wooyoung murmurs, shuffling forwards in his spot to reach the outline of kevin's figure.

rubbing the younger's back soothingly, kevin leans back, gently smiling. "hey. cobie's bringing down pizza, by the way. it's meant to be a surprise, so just pretend i didn't tell you."

wooyoung chuckles. "mhm. isn't he meant to be revising for that stupid tech exam he has tomorrow, though?"

"he's meant to be, yeah," kevin mutters, but shakes his head. "it's fine, he always does great, anyway."

"yeah." wooyoung hums, comfortably hugging onto his knees again; he always feels safer that way. the silence that ensues over them isn't awkward, it never is with kevin, yet he still wishes the latter would say something about it already.

but he doesn't. instead, the glints of worry which flash through kevin's eyes every time wooyoung accidentally meets his gaze are the only words spoken whilst they wait for jacob's arrival.

and shortly, the door is thrown open again, this time along with a huge gust of wind from the cold night. encouraging the door shut with his foot, jacob grins at the two awaiting him, a large box of pizza busying the use of his arms. he then races towards wooyoung and kevin, who muffle back their laughter as he just about saves himself from disastrously toppling over his own feet.

"is watching me almost rip my skull open the most y'all can do?" jacob greets ever so kindly.

"you know it," wooyoung returns, attempting to snatch the box out of his friend's hands. however, it is quickly held away from him, causing him to scoff. "what? i'm hungry."

"and starving you isn't even on the bottom of my list, but—" jacob sits himself, legs crossed, with the pair. "i could consider it if you don't talk to us."

wooyoung rolls his eyes, though he didn't expect any less, honestly. "are you really settling on manipulation right now?"

"yes," jacob answers nonchalantly.

letting out a dramatic whine, wooyoung desperately turns to kevin. "you can't just let him do this to me, kev."

"what can i do?"

"you're his boyfriend, not me! take away his blowjob rights, or something, i don't know!"

"no can do, sorry." kevin shrugs.

wooyoung huffs, sending a glare into the direction of jacob's victorious expression. "fine. but only for the pizza."

"see? was it that hard?" jacob says, letting the lid of the pizza box fall open, before handing one out to the others. wooyoung just grumbles in response, distastefully removing the peppers from his slice of pizza, as a question is already aimed his way, "so — what happened?"

averting his gaze to the ground, wooyoung swallows down a bite of his food, despite the sudden urge to just vomit it all out. "well, i-i did what we decided on..."

"that's really good, woo," jacob attempts to convince wooyoung's dull features.

"yeah, it is," kevin adds. "we're so proud of you, y'know?"

wooyoung shakes his head. "but i didn't— i couldn't do it. n-not for long, anyway. i didn't even last one chorus, before i th-thought of what happened. then, things got dizzy and i fucking fell..." the boy chuckles in disbelief at himself, holding back his threatening tears. at this point, he's just a helpless wreck.

"but you still tried," jacob presses on. "you came all the way down here, despite what must've gone through your mind, and you tried. i know you, woo, and you never give up easily. i know you tried to fight it, i know you did all you can. so if it didn't work, that's okay. you did your best, and that's all anyone can ever ask from you, including yourself. got that?"

"yeah, but—"

"no, woo, cobie's right," kevin interrupts softly. "you tried your best today, and you might not have gotten the result you wanted, but what more can you do besides keep going? hm?"

"i-i..." wooyoung doesn't have anything to say. he shrugs his shoulders, as if neither jacob nor kevin's words mean anything to him, right as his phone dings.

not even sparing the device a glance, he carelessly flips it onto its front.

as wooyoung reaches out for another slice of pizza, kevin brings up, "doesn't your sad singer boy always post at this time?"

wooyoung freezes momentarily. saving his appetite for another time, he fumbles with his phone, before bringing it up to his face. and kevin's right; not only is it eleven pm, a notification also sits at the very top of wooyoung's phone.

hurriedly swiping his screen, he practically bounces in his seat as his instagram loads. kevin and jacob send each other a knowing look, watching amusedly as wooyoung mutters impatiently to himself, "hurry up, hurry up, hurry up..."

and, without any warning, the most inhumane sound deafeningly leaves his lips.

his phone slips out of his grasp in sheer shock, coincidentally landing on kevin's lap, who huddles towards jacob as they discover, together, what has possibly gotten wooyoung so... well, whatever is up with him right now, basically sprawled across the ground with his palm glued to his mouth, still seeming to be registering the sight he was just met with.

###

where_san_sings

789 likes
where_san_sings yes i have a face
view all 653 comments

princessgi MF WUAT HAPPENED TO "oh idt i'll do a face reveal any time soon"???

lifeonmars AHH HANDSOME

hongjoong.k my best friend iktr

jjongch u look good hyung!

sansvenus and they told me my fanpage would be good for nothing 😒😒😒
   | sansvenus but sir u r so fucking fine how'd i get this lucky ??>773:)&27

###

"bro, what the fuck!" kevin gasps, eyes wide.

"exactly!" wooyoung cries, flailing his limbs about. "this stimulation is so biased, how does he— what— oh my god, i can't believe this entire fucking time he looked like that!"

"sucks for you, you would've had a chance if he did this back when he was nugu."

wooyoung lifts his head up, finally silencing his tantrum. "huh?"

"just saying," kevin mumbles, still occupying wooyoung's phone. "it doesn't look like any of these could be his partne—"

snatching the device from the older's grasp, wooyoung makes a face. "why would you— jacob's right there, have a little mercy."

"but he is pretty," jacob says, and wooyoung doesn't know how to react. so he doesn't. simple. perhaps not the best idea, though, because his friend takes the opportunity to continue, "wait a minute, you should totally comment something!"

"why would i do that?" wooyoung squirms, the thought cringing him out. after all, he doesn't know what he could possibly say that wouldn't weird the singer out.

"maybe because he's hot as hell?" kevin encourages.

wooyoung snorts. "i'm not embarrassing myself for nothing."

jacob slides the leftover pizza towards wooyoung. "change your mind yet?"

"you're insane!"

"how much is it gonna hurt you?" kevin leans forward. "and anyway, if we think realistically, there's no way he'll see your comment with that fine ass twelve thousand followers he has, now, will he?"

simply for the sake of his friends giving him a break, wooyoung presses his lips together in annoyance, before switching his phone on again. "i hate y'all more than myself sometimes," he mutters as he types the very first thing which comes to mind.

and, foolishly, without a second thought, wooyoung presses send.

###

where_san_sings

1674 likes
where_san_sings yes i have a face
view all 1284 comments

princessgi MF WUAT HAPPENED TO "oh idt i'll do a face reveal any time soon"???
   | where_san_sings surprise????

lifeonmars AHH HANDSOME
   | where_san_sings YOU !!

hongjoong.k my best friend iktr
   | where_san_sings only if u lemme borrow the literature hw due in tmr :DD
      | hongjoong.k already sorted u a copy bitch
         | where_san_sings 🤘🤘🤘

jjongch u look good hyung!
   | where_san_sings THANK YOU BB

sansvenus and they told me my fanpage would be good for nothing 😒😒😒
   | sansvenus but sir u r so fucking fine how'd i get this lucky ??>773:)&27
      | sunwoostattoo stfu delulu ass

woo_jung just as pretty as ur voice
   | where_san_sings ahhh so sweet wtf thank u <3

###

a/n: first chapter hello

i should've put this in the intro thing i feel but featuring ryuception as user sunwoostattoo aha i'm totally not in love w them wdym-

i still have no clue how i scored his permission to go ahead w this but pls ship us it'd be greatly appreciated xx

my tummy hurts i'm so nervous to publish this cus it's like the complete opposite of my usual writing style (sing me to sleep will have v few narrative chapters) but hopefully there's someone out there who enjoys the mess this has yet to become!

also happy valentine's day ily