I'm a man with many faults, one of which is my love of peanut butter jelly sandwiches. Penelope already knows this and is waiting for me in Ennis and Art's kitchen with a plateful of glorious triangles and a tall glass of soy milk because Artemis doesn't buy the animal-stuff. I sigh, resigning myself to my fate as I stuff my face with the best culinary invention in Earth's history.

"You caught me." Clever girl.

She smirks, "It was easy. I could hear your stomach growling through the door."

"I figured."

"Now- don't get mad at me- but I called my dad. He's on his way now."

"Mr. Suarez?"

"Look, he knows more than I do. A lot more. You'll be safe in his hands."

"I doubt that," I sigh, resigning myself to fate, "this is the day I die."

"Could be." Penelope laughs cruelly, stealing one of the sandwiches.

Mr. Suarez reminds me of a WWE champion, the kind I used to watch on television when father snatched the remote control from me and turned the channel off Boomerang. He's a little taller than me and as broad as a bulldozer. His forehead is a tall plane of weathered skin red from sunlight. He's eyes are squinty and black. He stares at my face, scratching his upper lip in a way that makes me want to punch him. Issue is, I know he would punch back like the Hulk.

"What's with the- uh-" He points to my face, making gestures on his cheeks to match my whiskers.

"It's a genetic defect, dad. He doesn't like to talk about it."

"Right. I can see why."

Asshole. I kind of like this guy.

"Mind if I ask how you ended up with a bomb on your ankle? This isn't some probation-type deal is it? I'm already Latino, you know? I don't need another reason for cops to give me flak."

Sort of, I think to myself.

"No, dad. It's a- college thing. Comb here is in a fraternity. He got hazed."

Mr. Suarez crouches to get a look at my ankle. "Dios mio. They did a number on you, son. A bomb? Christ."

"Crazy motherfuckers." I respond. "Guy called O'Hara. Irish."

"Ah, that explains it." he laughs, "I was in a fraternity, back in the day. My roommate was from Dublin. Real asshole. He's Nelo's godfather. Gotta respect a guy who can chug a keg."

"Oh, yeah? I don't think O'Hara and I will be getting close anytime soon. In fact, I kinda want to bludgeon him. You think you can get this thing off?"

As for my fears of this place being bugged? I figure, to hell with it. Did I mention peanut butter is a relaxant for my species? Think, catnip for aliens.

"Sure."

Once gain, Penelope and I are in the bookstore only this time I'm sitting on a stool. She's behind the counter, watching with interest as Mr. Suarez drops a massive toolbox to the floor, a chorus of trinkles coming from inside. He pops the black and yellow thing open, selecting a small screwdriver that also looks like a giant needle. He pulls out the screws one by one, counting them off as he goes, "Uno, dos, tres..."

My stomach growls again. I've already had nine peanut butter and jelly halves but I glance at Penelope expectantly. She scribbles in that damned notebook, just like Leonard. Who am I kidding, their made for each other.

"Hey- uh- dad? You hungry?"

"Eh- thirsty."

"How does soy milk sound?"

He scowls, wiping a bead of sweat off his forehead with his gray sweatshirt. The device on my ankle has a black cover that he has popped off to expose of series of wired underneath. He says, "I'd rather be shot than drink that shit. Forget it."

"Well, uh, I'm going to grab some snacks. Be right back."

"So, you friends with that Leonard fellow?" Mr. Suarez asks me, black eyebrows raised.

"Um- yeah, I guess so."

"What do you- uh- think about him? Is he the marrying type?"

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I don't want him playing with my Nelo's feelings. It's all or nothing, you feel me?" I don't "feel" anything except a senseless desire for more peanut butter. I nod my head in agreement with Mr. Suarez. It seems like my best option. "Really? He seems like an asshole to me. The type who would run at the first sign of trouble."

"Oh, he's a pretentious prick. But, he's saved me more times than I can count." Although, reflecting on it, he and Artemis are always the ones putting me in the dangerous situations where I need saving.

Something zaps his tool from the bracelet below. My heart constricts in my chest. Will my blood paint the bookstore purple if I go boom? Artemis would love that.

"Is that normal?" I ask with worry.

"Mmm. I got this."

Really? That makes me feel so much better. Thanks, Mr. Suarez. Must keep sarcasm out of my voice, I think. I say, "How long have you been in the business?"

"Twenty-six? Twenty-five years? Been a while."

I can't think of anything else to say. The unspoken thoughts between us is awkward. Super awkward. Where are you, Penelo?

"Well, you look high as a kite, but I'm pretty sure you're not in a fraternity. Nelo's a terrible liar. Whatever you're involved with, you're lucky she called me." He pulls out a red wire and selects another tool from the box, one that has a hook on the end and glints silver under the low lights. "This thing's poorly put together. Based on the crap job, I would think it's government work."

Bingo. Penelo? Hello? Please come back!

"I- uh- it's- uh-"

"No need to explain yourself. I really don't care." Mr. Suarez interjects, his broad shoulder rolling with a crack as he stretches his arms. "You mind if I keep the bomb? This stuff is hard to come by."

What the hell for? "M-makes no difference to me."

"Right. Well, it's done."

True to his word, my cuff is undone. My leg is free. Some of the little black hairs beneath it have been rubbed off and there's a raw stripe on my ankle.

"Anything for my little Nelo." He laughs.

My God. He's an angel! Stroking my leg, I want to jump up and kiss him. Not that I'd try it. He would probably put me in a Camel Clutch.

He collects the pieces of the bracelet into his toolbox, slamming it closed. He yawns, "I'd say it's been a pleasure, but considering whatever your involved in, I hope I never see you again."

Pulling his hood up to protect his head from the drizzle outside, he disappears from Papercraft with a ding. He slinks down the street with the yellow-jacket striped box by his side. Mentally, I add a pair of wings and a halo to his silhouette. Penelope comes downstairs with a heaping plate of PB and J.

"Where's dad?"

"Already done." I reply, "I freakin' love that man. You know, Penelo, before all of this I was kind of hoping Leo would break up with you- because you're a nerd- but your dad's amazing. Welcome to the family."