"Mr. Gonsalez I was supposed to receive a progress report on the ZX series. I presume the deadline to begin with its production is this month. I have to contact all the manufacturers in China, Russia, India. How am I supposed to do that if we haven't confirmed the blueprint of the model?" I asked my company's senior Engineer. I know it's rough on them that I've called a board meeting up at six am but we are one month behind on our schedules and that will have to be compensated by putting in extra hours.

Also, I'm not a fool who doesn't remember that consistency is the way to survive in business. I know I need to come up with a newer concept that is magnificently better than my previous launches and somehow still better than what my competitors are doing.

We have been working on designing a new series of mobile phones, the ZX. Numerous days have been spent deciding on all the creative ways by which we can make this phone series better, sharper, and more impressive than the last one. The last month, after the explosion, has been seriously nerve-wracking. After the security that has tightened around the block of my department at N.N.P.O and the constant scrutiny that I receive from detective Braun who keeps on lurking over there for reasons best known to him, I'm barely holding onto my job.

During this time, I felt like it was best to stay at Arcane. I needed something else to occupy my brain, away from N.N.P.O. I now split my time here at Arcane and NNPO sixty to forty.

But I must say, nuclear power gives me more joy and immense satisfaction like nowhere else. But sadly, NNPO is not my home. What a paradox! I wonder to myself, what I love is not mine and what's mine is, I don't love.

But soon, hopefully soon, things will change.

My complete staff of a hundred and fifty employees is huddled together, jam-packed in the otherwise widely spacious conference room. I don't have any strict rules here at Arcane because I feel people work better when they are provided freedom.

We just have one rule here, get the work done on time. Which all of us broke collectively.

"And we did it, ma'am. The production of ZX can be initiated. I didn't mail you the progress report yesterday, because you were at NNPO when my team finished foolproofing. I didn't call you over there because I thought that a detective would come sniffing into our company if they ran a check on me while you talked to me. I assumed you would want them away from your business," Mr. Gonzales spoke like the smart gentleman he always is. Fifty years old and so much grey hair, but the gentleman still manages to look good!

I knew there was a reason I hired this man! Apart from being a genius at what he does, he also has a lot of knowledge about the legal aspects of things. Many times he has helped me avoid lawsuits. Also, his son, Noel is a lawyer, so he never shies away from helping me out.

Mr. Gonzales and his wife, Patricia have been my family, honestly. They've been more like my mom dad rather than my real parents. Noel is like a brother to me.

Here at ARCANE, we're all a family and it feels great to be working in this environment. This place makes me feel like Austin is my home, making me forget my past in Massachusetts.

I smile at Mr. Gonzales and it's full of relief, "That's very kind of you, sir."

"You're the boss. Don't call me sir," he says, being modest.

"You're elder to me and your experience in everything makes you wiser than I'll ever be." I stop.

I stand up from my seat and with me, all the senior members who were sitting at the conference table, stand up. Now all one hundred and fifty of us were standing.

"You all have stood by me since I hired you with the crazy idea of making a visionary mobile phone named X series. With your genius, creativity, and hard work it became our first breakthrough product." I smiled proudly at my employees, my friends.

They were beaming and the happiness was glistening through their eyes as they cheered. They weren't cheering for me, they were applauding their efforts. They were applauding -what we started from and what we have managed to become, a monster in the telecommunication industry.

" I soon followed that idea with another wacky idea and you guys again stood by me with full zeal and enthusiasm. And we were able to continue our lead with the second phone, the Z series. Which was an even bigger success than the last one," I pause.

The smiles on their faces and the sound of applause from their hands is so gratifying.

"And now, here we are. The same people, same strength, same excitement but a new idea. I hereby declare the production of the ZX series open!" I announce.

Hooting, howling, laughter, and employees praising each other on the back, are all that I can see. Some are hugging each other, some are talking gibberish.

It was so beautiful to see. I know at this very moment that every one of my employees has a burning Passion inside and they sincerely work for me as if it's their company, their home and it's their project.

I'm so thankful that I have found like-minded people like me who will go any extent of length to achieve what they set out to without fearing failure.

Nobody is prevented from failures. Downfall will happen to everyone. It's the way of life.

My secretary, Denize Bell pushes her way through the tight group of people to come towards me. I nod at her, allowing her to come closer as I see her approaching.

"Ma'am your father is here," she vomits out.

My world collapsed

Like the shocked person I am, right now, I say," what father?"

I heard it right the first time but I'm hopefully doubting my ears, wishing that I had heard it wrong.

"Your dad is here Ma'am," she repeats. I sulked down in my chair hoping that it would swallow me.

"Tell him I'm not here," I mutter grumpily.

"Ma'am he already knows you're here," she replies. I pout, realising that there's no way out of here.

"Fuck!" I mutter under my breath.

"I don't want to meet him," I say as I randomly play with the paperweight on the table, spinning it round and round.

"Okay, ma'am I'll tell him that," Denize says and starts to turn around.

My eyes widen as the realisation dawns on me that I am about to avoid my dad!

I sit up alert, " Wait, Denize," she turns around. "Send him to my office. I'm coming."

Fuck my life!

I'm confused, shocked, and scared. My father is so intimidating and I have always been wary of him. What am I supposed to feel?

I have spent most of my life fighting him over his beliefs, how am I supposed to feel comfortable around him? Tension into my soul is grilled by each encounter I've had with him. Wariness against him is imprinted on my heart as that man has tried to deny me my basis of living. And the reason? Girls are not supposed to do that! Your husband will take care of you! I will provide you with everything, you needn't worry! Just marry a rich man, look after his babies!

What is this? Bloody fifteenth century?

Let the girls decide what they're supposed to do!

"Guys I have an important meeting with my dad. You guys get back to your jobs and talk overseas with our manufacturers and seal the deals. I expect the files at my table at the earliest. Whoever has been assigned whichever branch, gets it done. Extra bonuses will be given to those who are the fastest. Something like international trips, free cruises, an increment in salary, or a holiday bonus. So do better."

I knew that announcing the royalties would get my attention and it worked like a charm. Always hang the bone before a dog and look what happens!

I did not just compare my employees with dogs!

Ladies were clapping and smiling while their eyes were widening, minds were magnifying. I bet they already made their plans. Men were flexing their arms while making a fist and saying, ' yes!'. But mostly the men were overactive and loud while the ladies were silent and coy.

But I think this is where I succeeded as a boss.

The only way to make a company work is by keeping the employees happy. More than your company it needs to be their company. If they're happy, half the work is done. And whenever they get too comfortable, pull the reins.

Staff cleared out of the conference room and only Mr. Gonsalez stayed behind. He knows how my father's behaviour affects me negatively.

"Honey, you'll be fine. Don't bend your morals in front of him, Don't let him drag you down," he spoke.

My heart warmed. I wish these were the words my dad spoke to me or that he wouldn't be like the way he is and these words would never be spoken about him.

"I'll be fine. I've survived worse. What's more?" I replied.

"Better or worse is yet to come. But you, prevail okay!" He made a fist and flexed his arm in front of him, showing me an act of strength.

A grin broke out on my face, " You're saying it like I'm going to fight Napoleon."

"Oh! He's worse. You're going on a war with Genghis Khan! Strike to kill, okay," he joins.

I laugh at his comparison of my dad with the vicious Genghis Khan.

"Off you go, boss," he says and I roll my eyes, "you don't have to call me that."

He exits the conference room. I follow behind him.

There's no use in delaying my meeting with Mr. Christopher Jones aka my father. Maybe he's just here because he heard about the almost blow-up situation I suffered a month back. Or that he knows about the affairs that are going on inside NNPO that I am unaware about. Well, my father is an important man who has a lot of important friends who seem to know everything that happens inside high-profile government offices.

I enter my office confidently, slithering like a reptile. This is my company. My zone. I won't let him shake me in my own house.

"Good morning, father," I say as I don't look at him properly. I just took a glance at his back and walked past him to sit on my chair behind the glass table.

As I sit on my chair, I am forced to meet his eyes. I am looking at him for the first time after four years and I have nothing to say.

I take my time to admire him. I'm nervous. I look so much like him.

A sudden wave of sadness washes over me. Looking at him has taken me back in time when he used to take me to morning walks in the parks and I would walk on the wet grass with him. As the dew would touch my feet, I would feel refreshed. I would run and run and he would capture my videos. All my videos are probably buried in a trench somewhere now.

I recall that he used to push me on the swings because I was too weak to swing myself upwards, into the limitless sky. He would do it for me. Once I fell from it because I loosened the grip of my hand on the iron chains. I fell so hard. I started crying as the blood oozed out of the bruises on my knees. I cried, not because I fell. I cried because the kids were laughing at me. And then he would tell me that he saw all of them falling yesterday. That would make me giggle and I would no longer worry about them picking on me. He told me to learn from my mistakes as well as the mistakes of others. Golden advice!

He supported me in all my decisions until he asked a very big thing from me which I couldn't give him. I could sacrifice my life but I couldn't sacrifice something which would make my life worthless.

I want to leave a legacy behind after I die but to do that, I have to create it as I live! My father never understood this because according to him, women have no right to create a legacy! Because men are the real thing! Working women are pretentious!

Imagine my surprise when I got to know for the first time that my hero thinks like that.

"Good to know that you remember your father isn't dead," he mutters with coldness lacing his words. He realised that I wasn't going to start the conversation so he did.

I suck in a harsh breath. No matter how much you try, a child can never hate his dad. I will always love him. I still do and that's why it hurts me whenever he talks to me this way.

"I'm sorry Dad," I say as I look down.

"Stop it! You never are. If you were, you wouldn't have humiliated me like that in the market!" He said sharply.

"Dad! I...never humiliated you," I say timidly.

"Tell me, girl! Where did I lack? I provided you with everything before you even asked for it. Why couldn't you do one thing for me? All I asked was just one thing!" He roared.

Whoa! That escalated fast. And here thought he came here because he was worried about me!

"Dad, have you ever thought what would have happened to me had I accepted your offer?" I'm almost on the verge of crying.

"What would have happened?" He stares at me as he hates me. He looks so menacing and I think my tongue got tied to some kind of invisible thread.

I look down.

"Look up, girl! If you think your decision is correct, look up with pride. Cowards look down?" His dominant and harsh voice makes me look up at him.

"Why do I see the fear, girl?" He says, now lowering his voice.

I take a few moments in silence before answering him. He is my father, he can say whatever his heart wants, but I will not forget the manners he infused into me when he loved me.

" Dad, I will say it for the last time. I did nothing wrong and I have no regrets. I'm not going to give you any explanations because I know you won't accept them and I respect you too much to say nonsense to your face because no matter how much you hate it, I am your daughter and I will mention your name- as the man who made me what I am today, on every stage that I am. Whether you like it or not, we are bound by blood," I say calmly. I choose my words with utmost care. I don't want to strike his ego, nor do I want to break my self-esteem.

Quite contrary to his behaviour, my dad is silent. He looks at me. When I say he looks at me, he does.

"You're right, I won't ever accept any of your explanations," my heart cracks.

My father broke my heart, all over again.

"And you will push me to my grave right?! I can't believe I raised such a selfish daughter. You will humiliate me till my last breath. Every time you say my name on getting a fake award that you probably buy with your money, is an insult to me and another spear of mud on my breathing face as you bury me alive."

There's complete silence after he says that. His breathing is erratic and I am numb. His eyes are red and mine contain no emotion. He's alive and I am dead.

I feel a constricting feeling at the centre of my chest. I can't breathe!

I start wheezing. Oh! I can't breathe.

My hands go to my chest and my eyes close. I grasp onto my chest as if I'm trying to pull out so that air could enter me. But nothing helps. Darkness surrounds me.

I start sweating but my focus is on my breathing.

"What is this now?" I hear my dad's voice. He's baffled.

I can't breathe!

Out of my peeping eyes, the small amount of vision that I have from under my drooping eyelids, I see him rise from his chair abruptly. He grasps onto his hair and starts pulling on it as he comes near me.

He grabs the back of my head with soft hands and looks at me.

He suddenly puts my back on my chair and goes to look inside various drawers.

I cough loudly. I cough as if I'm going to cough my trachea out. I gasp for air. My eyes close.

"No! no! Open your eyes baby," he says as he pulls at my eyelids softly. With the tug that he gave, I opened them.

He goes back to ruffling through my drawers. In the bottom drawer, he sees my inhaler.

He shakes the canister and helps me inhale the medicine through puffs.

After some minutes my breathing becomes normal and my heart rate reaches the baseline. I no longer feel that constriction inside my chest. I open my eyes and look at my dad staring at me.

"Thanks, Dad," I say.

He bites onto his lip harshly and looks at the side. He evades my presence as if it hurts him to look at me and that is enough for me to despise myself.

"Why do you have to make things so hard between us? Everything can go back to normal if you just accept what I decided for you," he says as he returns to reality.

"Dad, how can I give up on these companies that I worked so hard on?! Why are you so against me owning my business? And most of all why do you wish for me to be known as some rich guy's wife or a rich father's daughter?" I say and my voice cracks. I know he won't understand it. He never has. It's useless.

Before he can open his mouth to speak, Mr. Gonsalez bursts inside the office and my father turns in his chair to look at the person who rudely interrupted him.

I am shocked to see the state Mr. Gonsalez is in. He's perspiring and huffing.

"Are you alright honey?" He asked me.

My father's face twists in horror. And I understand what he is thinking.

Oh no! He's going to think so low of me.

It breaks my heart that he can think like that about me. Time and distance do wonders to relationships. Bad wonders.

"I'm okay sir!" I say to him as I offer him the untouched glass of water from my table. I uncover the lid and give it to him as I make him sit on the chair next to my father.

My father looks horrified and anger covers his irises. He's looking at me with such a hard glare.

Mr. Gonsalez touches my wrist. And my Father's eyes widened. That's it! He's about to boom.

"Get your fucking hands off my daughter," he stands up as he shrieks.

My whole body trembles. I shake like lightning just struck me.

I shudder as he looks at me and raises a finger, " I cannot imagine for the life of me that you have stooped to these levels?! You gave me such bullshit and this is how you run your company? This is how you become successful?" He screams.

"Mr. Jones, you have got it wrong!" Mr. Gonsalez says calmly.

"You dare speak to me!" My father screams so loud. I'm afraid he's going to damage his vocal cords.

"Dad. Mr. Gonsalez is like a father to me. He was there for me when you weren't there. And yes this is my way of becoming successful, I have made a family of relations bound by trust and respect rather than blood and you are in no position to judge me after waltzing into my life after four years and behaving as such you've always been the dad that I wanted."

Pin drop silence.

For the first time in the entire conversation, I watched my dad shatter a little. But he's too proud to say anything. I know that.

How? Because I'm just like him. Too proud to make confessions.

"Now Mr. Gonsalez, what did you need?" I turn my attention towards him.

My dad stands still like a tortoise hidden inside his shell, with his face down.

"The health app of our company's software started buzzing on your name. Your phone might have been in contact with your skin and it showed me crazy readings and I knew something was wrong with you so I climbed up the stairs," he explained.

My heart cracks because I have two fathers. One saves me because it's his duty and the other does it because he wants to.

Or maybe you're wrong. Says that inner voice.

My dad looks up at Mr. Gonsalez and I swear I look at a tear falling from his eye. He keeps on staring at him. He doesn't do anything else except that.

"Thank you so much. Mr. Gonsalez for everything that you've done for me," I thank him from the bottom of my heart.

"No worries boss!" He gives me a salute with two fingers and nods at my father before exiting my voice.

I stand. He stands. I stare at him. He stares at the place where Mr. Gonsalez stood.

My phone starts to ring and my father's eyes land on it. My phone lines rang at the centre of the table, between us.

I don't dare to pick it up. My father looks at me and then at the phone and then again at me.

I think that's the permission for me to pick it up.

With trembling hands and very cautiously while looking at him, I reach for the phone. I'm trying to judge if I've guessed his body language right.

I look at the name on the screen.

"It's Pete," I say.

My father nods, " put it on speaker."

Oh boy!

I do as he says and my brother's voice chirps from the other side of the phone, "hey my little Chernobyl!"

"You know that was a terrible atrocity right?" I reply cautiously.

"Fuck! You're right. I'm sorry I won't say that again. How are you my little monster," he asks me again.

"I'm fine," I reply.

"I'm in Massachusetts today. I saw our old house and you know I planted a sapling in the dead garden over there and I paid a gardener to always water it even in my absence. I made him add me on Snapchat and he will send me a snap every day after watering it and only then will I transfer his money!" He says excitedly. A small smile graces dad's lips and I know, Pete's innocence tugged at his heart. My dad is a simple man at heart, I know that.

"And what else?" I asked him. I could judge it from his nostalgic tone that he wanted to add more.

"You know that swing we had. The one dad used to push us on-," Dad closes his eyes.

Oh! Pete, please stop-

"I saw it and fuck I -," his voice cracked and his voice go silent on the other end but I can hear his fast breathing.

He's controlling his tears.

I am shocked at my dad's reaction. He makes a fist of his right hand and starts stroking it on my table, helplessly. He keeps on doing it.

My eyes widen and I go rock solid.

"Char? Are you okay? I'm so sorry I know I shouldn't have talked about dad with you-"

I cut him off, "It's not me Pete. It's dad. He's here."

My brother freaks out and ends the call.

And right after that, my dad stops striking his hand on the table and he picks his head up which was lying flat on the table, and exits my office in hurry or fury, I have no idea.

As I remove my eyes from the door, I look at the table and I am left bereft for what feels like the twentieth time in the past one hour -because I see blood and water.

My Father's tears mixed with his blood. That blood runs in us. And he bled while he was talking to his children.

What has happened to all of us?

How did we come to this?

He makes us cry, we make him cry yet no one can comfort each other.

In all the years I thought, he left me alone. But today I realised, we left him alone too!

I spent my life blaming him. But today, seeing him like this, makes me feel like I didn't try my best to understand him.

***
Author's note
Father enters the conversation
Child has left the chat.

😂😂
Love, Leena ❤❤
Bye-bye until next time.