Before we begin... *cracks knuckles* ... 

No really... I want to apologize that it's taken me so long to finish this.  My life has been ... a mess in the past few weeks.  Just a few of the lovely things that have happened... 

My car broke down (lovely) - I had to put my nearly 15 yr old dog down (still trying to get over it) -  my PTX/Kelly concert was canceled -  I've been sick, my cat's been sick ... my cousin ended up in the hospital w/ blood clots in both lungs... then ended up BACK in the hospital with multiple blood clots in one leg.  (He's ok for now... just meds and no stress) I took a trip to North Carolina to visit my grandmother who has turned into a judgmental ...person... (I love her but... apparently compassion is something you can lose as you get older... also brain to mouth filters... and also self preservation! Seriously Nana... when your oxygen is low it's not 'nbd') ... 

So yes. Those are just the tiniest bit of the things going on in my life right now. There's a lot of other things that are still going on and have been going on for awhile that just have put me in a funk... so honestly I am very sorry I've been so M.I.A. lately but trust me... I'm WAY off my game and have been for probably the last 6 months so just bear with me. I'm trying to get the personal life put back together again so I can write and even read since I'm literally SO SO SO behind on reading EVERYTHING. Thanks for sticking with me it truly means literally everything.  

Again... must mention the people who, without them, this story would have never happened.

evekatalbas , DeanneAdams, _opheliac, & Sreed09 

Different variations of proof reading and inspiration and ideas and toleration of a LOT of whining came from them and I couldn't be more grateful.  

Sorry for the long intro... and sorry if this isn't exactly what I wanted it to be, but I didn't want to leave it there.  

Now w/o further ado... The End (sorry Sarah :-P ). 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Avi wiped at his cheeks again. He couldn't look at Scott and hold it together so he just kept his focus on the faded mint of the hospital blanket covering him. "What am I supposed to do now?" 

"I don't know."

Scott shifted in his seat as silence stretched long and heavy between them.

"I didn't even get to say goodbye." Avi choked up again and looked over at the curtain covering the window.

"I know."

"So I'm just... never going to see her again? Never hold her hand or.. hear her laugh..?" 

"I'm... not sure."

"How am I supposed to keep going knowing she's still out there somewhere. How can I just pretend that everything's fine? No one is ever gonna be her, Scott. I can't just forget that."

The sorrow in his voice ripped Scott into a hundred little pieces. He knew the hellish torture that losing Mitch had been and didn't wish that pain on anyone, especially not Avi. "No, you can't. I wish I could say that it'll get better, but I don't know that it will. I don't want to lie to you or feed you a bunch of bullshít. No, it may not ever get easier, but maybe we can fix it."

"How? She doesn't even know who I am anymore!"

Green eyes turned to meet blue and the sight of them nearly broke his heart. "She fell in love with you once... why wouldn't she again?" 

"So I'm just supposed to wander into Illyria and hope she'll be ok with the random human? It didn't happen in 5 seconds..."

"No. I know, I just.. Mitch has to go back to talk to his dad or something and I want to see Sarah so ... why not come with us?" 

"I don't know if ... I can stand seeing her look at me and not know who I am."

"Av..." He tried to think of something good to say, but the words just didn't want to come.

"Am I being selfish? I want to go and try to get her back somehow, but what if she'd be happier in her world... with another fae."

"If that were true she probably wouldn't have fallen in love with you in the first place. She chose you. Doesn't that count for something? Just because she lost her memories doesn't mean she's suddenly someone else. She may not remember but you were her choice. I think you should at least give it a shot." 

"What am I gonna do if she wants nothing to do with me?"

Scott didn't know the answer to that so he just shook his head. "Then ... at least you'll know you tried. No regrets, right?"

"I love her so much. If the bond is broken then why does it feel like this?"

"I don't know." His entire chest ached as he watched his friend slowly break down. There wasn't anything he could do to make it better, nothing he could say to make it hurt any less. This wasn't something you could stick a bandaid on and hope for the best, this would be an angry, open wound and nothing but time would help to heal it.. or at least numb it ... if only a little. He only hoped that one day enough time would pass for Avi to smile again.

"I can't feel her anymore. Like... there was always just a little piece of me that could always-" His voice cracked and he looked to the opposite wall, teeth clenched.

"I know." Scott put his hand on his own chest without even realizing. He knew that feeling well. 

"She told me once that a fae's heart is predestined for another's and that their magic recognizes when it finds its match and responds. I guess she was wrong. Her heart couldn't have been meant for mine if we're from two separate worlds. What if I took her from someone? What if her soulmate is still there and I'm just-"

"Stop! I don't care where they're from. Mitch was meant for me and nothing you or his father or anyone else says will convince me otherwise. Just because she came from another world doesn't mean that everything that happened didn't happen for a reason. My dad was meant to get that new job and we were meant to move here. Mitch was meant to be a rebel and come through the veil when he was a kid. Even my own stupidity and losing years of love and happiness ... maybe it happened so you could find Oryn. Maybe Mitch's dad closed the veil and trapped you there so that you had time to bond and fall in love."

"Then why did this happen? What reason could this possibly have, Scott?" 

"I don't know. I'm sorry."

"I really wanted to make her happy, y'know? I let myself imagine what our life was going to be like." He sniffled and wiped at his face for probably the hundredth time. "I was so happy, just holding her in my arms... watching her sleep. Everytime she told me she loved me I just..." He couldn't finish, but Scott understood all too well.

"Then maybe you owe it to yourself to at least try. If not for you, then for her. I barely met her, but I know she loved you just by the way she looked at you. You'll regret it for the rest of your life if you don't at least say goodbye, even if she doesn't understand."

Avi sniffled and stared at the blanket covering his lap. The words he whisper/whimpered out were barely heard by Scott, but that didn't make them any less painful. 

"I don't want to say goodbye."

~~~

"Didn't think I'd be doing this again." Scott stared at the place the veil was meant to be. 

"I just spent months trying to get out of there... and here I am about to go back." Avi looked exhausted, but no matter how much Scott and even Mitch argued that he should give himself time to heal before going back to Illyria, Avi wasn't having it. He could deal with physical pain but every second he'd spent laying there thinking about what he'd lost in another world was slowly killing him. He'd made a decision. He'd try... see if he could somehow begin to form a connection again, but if she was afraid or even overly uncomfortable then he would say goodbye and let her go. The thought threatened to bring on more tears, but he managed to hold them back.

Mitch looked uncomfortable in his fae clothing. He'd gotten so used to the comfort of sweats and pajama pants... and of course the majority of the time when he just couldn't be bothered with clothing, completely unashamed of his nudity. The constricting material, while not uncomfortable, was enough to keep him focus, reminding him of where he belonged.

"Once we cross we stay together." He reached for Scott's hand and waited until Avi had done the same. He took a deep breath, mentally preparing for everything he knew they were about to face and then stepped through the veil

~~~

It was a blow to his heart being back at the cliff overlooking the ocean. The memories of time spent missing and wishing and longing were still too near, still as poignant as ever. Still, he hadn't been surprised in the least when Orion told him that this would be where he would find the missing female. She looked a bit lost as she stood staring off into open space just as he had so many times before.

"I have missed you." She didn't turn to acknowledge him, but he smiled at her words.

"And I you. May I ask why you are here?" He inquired as he moved to stand next to her, shoulder to shoulder.

"I do not know. You always came here, said when you were here you felt less lonely. I was hoping it would help me in the same way." 

He could barely hold his emotions in check, the sadness in her voice tugging furiously at his heart.

"What is wrong with me, Mitchell?"

When she turned to face him he was taken aback. The tiny line of silver that had remained lining the pupils of her eyes had spread, now covering over half of her iris. He didn't know what to say so he just stared in silent shock.

"Orion will not tell me, and I cannot make sense of it. Please be honest." 

"I am not sure it is my place to say."

"I cannot live like this. It feels like a part of me is missing but nothing is. I am still me and nothing has changed, yet I am not the same. There is no logical reason that I should feel this lonely. I try to sleep and I cannot. Neither Lily nor Lia will eat or fly or do anything but lay around. I am not bonded but my eyes are turning silver like the kings.. like yours when you lost your Scott.. I am broken, Mitchell. Something is happening to me and I cannot continue to bear it." 

The sob that punctuated the end of her confession convinced him that he needed to be honest with her. Nothing she was experiencing was fair or even logical, but it wouldn't be fair to continue to withhold the truth either.

"Is this what it felt like? Is this the torment you were attempting to escape?"

"Oryn..." 

"Mitchell, please! I am begging."

"I do not know that the truth will make it easier or if it would only make things harder, but you deserve to know. Come, we have much to discuss and little time to do it." 

She nodded, following him in silence, the promise of the truth easing her mind if only for a short moment.

~~~

It was strange being back in Oryn's tree house. It had been only a few months since he'd last set foot in the fantastic place under very different circumstances, but it felt like another lifetime. The awe and wonder he'd had during his first trip to the other world had faded and now he was left with memories of what was and what may never be again. 

Mitch had gone off on his own to find Oryn and Scott was outside chasing down Sarah. He was left to himself, his only company two very depressed young dragons.

He sat on their cushion, Lily curled up in his lap and a strangely docile Lia with her head snuggled against his hip. They'd grown exponentially since he'd last seen them and he knew it wouldn't be long before they outgrew their current accommodations and went to live with the big dragons.

He'd let himself wander for a moment, but found it safer to stay in one spot. There were too many reminders, triggers of flashbacks and recalled memories. He spent the time alone wondering what he could have done differently, what he would do if he could turn back time. Would he take it back? Save himself the heartache? No. Even if he never saw her again he wouldn't trade all of the moments they'd shared for anything. She was worth the heartbreak.

He tried to imagine what his life would be like after this should he have to let her go for good. He had his family, his friends that all cared about him. He had Draconem...

The thought of the pub that he'd worked so hard for felt like a railroad spike being driven into his chest. He'd been so proud when it opened and at the time it felt like everything he'd ever wanted. Now he wasn't sure he could walk into it without his heart breaking all over again. All of the things he loved, all of the imagination and fantasy that had gone into creating Draconem... it wasn't just fantasy anymore. Dragons... fae.. night mares and other fantastical creatures ... they were very real and it all connected to her.

He'd never be able to watch The Lord of the Rings movies ever again... or pretty much any fantasy movie ever. Most of the decor in his home would have to be changed. All of the things he'd taken comfort in, connected with... the things that made him happy would turn against him. It would change him in ways he wasn't sure he was ready to deal with, but maybe it already had.

"How are you feeling?" 

He was pulled from his thoughts as Orion's voice interrupted the silence. Unsurprisingly he hadn't even heard his approach. "I've been better, but I'm not dead and ... that's something I guess."

They both remained silent after that, the awkwardness settling in and making them both uncomfortable.

"Look, I know you just wanted to protect her and you were kinda under the influence. I don't really understand it, and I'm not going to be over it for a really, really long time... if ever.. but I just ...I don't really blame you. I know that doesn't make much sense but I just thought you should know." 

Guilt reflected a dark matte gray in the fae's eyes and he looked as if there were a thousand words he wanted to say. Instead he lifted his chin, pride biting his tongue, and gave a short nod. A few more awkward moments passed before either spoke again. "Mitchell has returned and is calling for you. Come... I will accompany you."

The fact that he wasn't coming up only convinced Avi that Oryn wanted nothing to do with him. Orion flinched, recoiling from the sadness the human's aura suddenly threw off.

Avi fought tears again as he said a couple of short goodbyes to the pudgeys, placing a kiss on each of their little heads before standing and joining Orion in the entryway.

"It is not the end, Avriel. Hope is never completely lost."

Avi tried to give him a smile as he lifted his bag back onto his shoulder, but he just couldn't manage it. He silently followed Orion and let the tree lift him and carry him back to the ground.

-----

It was a lively reunion between man and pudgey. Scott had attempted to sneak up on her, but she had smelled him coming and he was the one surprised as he was tackled from the sky. Sarah had doubled in size, a sparkling set of impressive wings giving her a new kind of freedom. The lack of magic in his world had stunted the little beings growth, but now that she was back where she belonged things were beginning to catch up.

The overly excited dragon rubbed her face all over his, squeaking out a few gravely noises in greeting before taking to the skies again to show off. Scott just sat on the ground and watched her for awhile. He was amazed by just how beautiful she'd become. The glittering gold tones of her body seemed to shift like molten gold and copper, fading and swirling together. He'd missed her constant presence, but seeing her master the sky let him know it was for the best.

"Alright, alright I get it. You're very impressive. Now come down here so I can see you." He laughed. It took her a minute but she finally came to a gentle landing at his feet. She climbed over his legs and into his lap and he wrapped his arms around her, careful not to disturb her wings. "I missed you, little girl." 

She squeaked out her own reply and cuddled into him.

"I hope that means you missed me too."

___

"How is she?" Avi's feet had barely sunk into the grass before he was asking questions. Mitch looked a little sad and he knew that it hadn't gone well.

"Lost. Confused. Her heart knows something is missing but does not know that it is you." 

"But the bond is broken isn't it? She isn't supposed to be hurting."

"I know, but that does not change the fact that she is. She can still feel her broken heart, but can not remember why it is broken." 

"It's not fair. At least if she was happy or better off then maybe I could let her go, y'know? Maybe it wouldn't hurt as bad if I knew she was ok, that she could love.." he pressed his lips together, unable to finish his words. The idea of her giving her heart to someone else was even more painful than the dagger had been, He didn't want to think about it, but if it made her happy then he could maybe one day accept it. He stared at the ground, fighting an endless battle with himself... fighting for composure and digging deep for the strength to not fall apart.

Mitch wanted to say that it would still hurt even if she had been able to be happy, he knew that better than anyone, but another voice broke the silence before he could..

"Avriel?" 

Avi heard her voice, hesitant and rather small, but he didn't really believe it was real and closed his eyes to chase away the ghost of memory.

"Avi... she knows. I told her the truth... everything, at least the parts I knew. She deserved to know."

He opened his eyes looking at Mitch before following the direction of the other's gaze. When he saw her she looked frightened, but interested at the same time. The memories of their first meeting came flooding back and he had to dig his fingernails into his palms to keep from running over to her.

"I will leave you two to talk. I must speak with my father. Orion, will you stay with Scott? I am sure you hear him, he is not far." 

Orion nodded and the two moved off in different directions. The white haired fae stopped to whisper a few words into Oryn's ear before leaving the separated lovers alone.

Avi opened his mouth to speak but quickly closed it again, remembering how startled she'd been the first time she heard the bass in his voice. He could see the sadness in her eyes and the spreading silver made his heart ache to comfort her.

He was surprised when she took a few steps closer, her trademark curiosity shining through. "You are- were my bondmate?" 

He nodded a bit, eyes never leaving hers.

"How are your injuries? Are you in pain?"

Depends on your definition of pain.

It took him a moment before he dared to speak..albeit softer than his normal speech "Physically? Nothing I can't handle."

"Mitchell told me of our journey together. He told me that I loved you very much and you loved me perhaps even more. I am sorry that I do not remember, but I do believe him." 

She took another step closer and his heart skipped another beat.

"Did we meet in your world?"

He nodded. "You came looking for Scott and I happened to be there." 

"And how did you get trapped here without Scott?"

"You wanted to show me a cave... with a lake and .. I think you called them wisps." 

She nodded, watching him with a slight tilt to her head and a new spark of interest in her eyes. "It is my favorite place." 

He nodded. "It's beautiful. We spent ages talking and I showed you a movie and we lost track of time." 

"What is a movie?" 

The question, the memories that meant so much to him... so many words and actions and moments that shaped their relationship ...they were all gone. Everything that they'd been through ... all the things she would never remember... it crushed his heart just a little more and threatened to suffocate him. A tear slid from his eye and down his cheek and then another and another. Whether simple compassion or pure muscle memory Oryn lifted her fingers to wipe them away.

"It was not my intention to upset you." 

He shook his head a bit, trying to force a smile though it all just seemed so hopeless. "I actually brought you something." He put his bag on the ground and rummaged through until he found the iPad he'd gotten for her. It was already filled with the Lord of the Rings movies. "You loved movies. They're like um... stories with visuals. Kind of like a type of human magic..ish.."

Her interest piqued, she moved even closer to regard the foreign object in Avi's hand before staring up into his face. The way he looked at her stirred all kinds of feelings in her chest and flashing in her eyes. She found herself unable to look away and a smile slowly began to lift her lips. "If I take you there... will you show me?"

She offered her hand and Avi fought back tears once again. "I will never be able to say no to you." 

Her eyes narrowed just a bit as his hand slid into hers. "Is it because of magic?"

He chuckled and the sound of it was apparently amusing and she giggled just a bit. "No. It's a choice. It's just love." 

"But the bond is broken?" 

"You told me once that love is love and the bond only works to strengthen that love. I may not be magically connected to you anymore, but that doesn't make me love you any less. Oryn, you mean everything to me and seeing you like this, knowing you don't remember all of the incredible moments we've shared... it's really hard. It hurts... a lot."

She frowned again, the sad sheen glazing over her eyes just as more tears found their way down his cheeks. "I am sorry that I do not remember." She apologized again for the loss of bond and memory that she could not control. His sadness still seemed to affect her and while he was a stranger to her, something about him just felt right and quite comfortable. "Mitchell has a theory that perhaps if we can manage to bond again that my memories would return. I do not know if that is true, but I am willing to try. Even if they are lost forever, I think there is still something there. You feel... familiar?" 

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable or upset you anymore than you already are. I know you probably want time to process..."

She shook her head no, a bright teal framing the silver in her eyes, and she squeezed his hand just a bit. "If you would be willing, I should very much like to experience human magic. Shall we attempt to make new memories?" 

He stared into her eyes, the hopeful gaze giving him his own spark of hope. Maybe things would be different... maybe she wouldn't fall in love with him this time around.

But maybe she would. "Lead the way."

~~~

"Now will you tell me what you and your dad talked about?!"

Scott took off his raincoat and hung it in the closet. Mitch had refused to talk about his lengthy conversation with the king until they were back in the human world. Avi had been in much higher spirits when he drove away than he had been that morning when he pulled into Scott's driveway. Mitch had agreed to take him back through the veil the next morning (with Scott of course) and Orion would send him back when he was ready to leave. 

Mitch sent him a bright smile. "You."

Scott laughed. "I figured. Daddy dearest still think i'm an evil monster?" 

"Basically, but I told him if he ever wanted to see his son again then he would just have to accept you and our bond."

"I'm sure that went over wonderfully." Scott rolled his eyes as he moved into the kitchen and grabbed them each a bottle of water. As he reached out the symbol on his arm caught his eye and he couldn't help but smile at the reminder of everything he was lucky enough to have in his life.

"He threatened to imprison me until I could come to my senses and finally use the dagger to sever our bond. Once I explained the dagger was hidden away in the human world he did not have much of a choice but to acquiesce. You are allowed within Illyria's borders but only when accompanied by me and we have to make sure that he is informed any time that you are there. The veil shall remain open and Orion will be our liaison should he ever need to contact me." 

"Does he know about Avi?"

"No. One human at a time." 

"Good thinking. So I don't have to meet King what's his name right? I know he's your dad but something tells me it wouldn't go so well." 

Mitch laughed and walked over to wrap his arms around his love's waist. "No. He wanted us to live in the palace, but I took care of that."

"Thank God. So anything else I should know about?" He nuzzled into Mitch's neck, lips ghosting over cool skin.

"No. You are human so you cannot hold a title so no ceremonies or what not." He pulled away to press a chaste kiss to Scott's lips. "The only other rule was we still have to produce an heir to continue the bloodline. No rush on that though." He grabbed his bottle of water from the counter where Scott had placed it.

"Ha ha. You're hilarious." Scott watched him walk out of the kitchen, sipping from his water. "Wait... you're not serious right?"

Mitch smirked to himself as he rounded the corner and slipped into the hallway headed for the bedroom. 

"Male fae can't get pregnant, right?!" Scott called and followed after him. "Mitch?... MITCHELL???????"