Her words paralyzed each of my muscles, all my organs, all my functions. I didn't know what to say, and damn it, my face, I must have looked scared to death. I turned to her; I couldn't see her well due to the darkness, and a wave of relief washed over me. It was too dark, she was too sleepy, there was no way she could have seen my less-than-calm face.

"I had forgotten that tonight is my turn to keep watch at the tunnels. I have to go."

Each word sent a pang of pain through my chest. I didn't like lying (I wasn't very good at it either), but somehow, over time, I had gotten used to it. I could still justify each lie in my mind—I had lost my brother, I had to help him, he didn't have anyone else—blah, blah, blah. That reasoning was what kept me going. But that night, something inside me cracked. Maybe telling her the truth wasn't ideal, but neither was lying.

"I'm sorry I woke you up. Go back to sleep." I reached her in bed and tucked an extra blanket around her. Heather's eyes closed, and she fell asleep immediately. That was close. I had to be more careful. I slipped out of the room, gripping the repeater Erik had given me, and headed toward the electric tower. It wasn't far—I could get there in about fifteen minutes—but the black-light system was a problem.

Imagine the deepest, heaviest, most suffocating, and overwhelming black. Like a silent, bottomless hole in the earth. Like an abyss in the ocean. Like the endless void of space. That was the night at the border. That was what they called the black-light system—their way of protecting the wall. After all, how could anyone get through if they couldn't see a thing?

The watchtowers had small violet flashlights that let the guards pierce through the murk, invisible beams only they could see. I used one of them to get there, along with our Reg Bracelet sensor, to track the intensity of the waves the electric tower sent through it. The stronger the waves, the closer I was.

When I got there, I circled the tower, searching for the external ladder I had climbed the night I saved Heather. It was the only way up to the roof. The ladder was old and rusted, corroded by acid rain. It was no doubt weaker than before. Great—heights again—perfect plan.

The wind wasn't on my side. It grew stronger as I ascended, making the ladder sway as wildly as my nerves. When I was nearly at the top, I passed the window on the last floor, the same one I used during Heather's rescue. Just as I got closer, I heard a voice.

Time to be as sneaky as a shadow in the dark. I took a slow, steady breath and moved carefully. As I neared the window, more voices filtered through. Not just one person, at least two. I discreetly glanced inside and saw Kate and Lea.

"You're overreacting; it's probably just a coincidence." Kate was saying.

"If you say so. But I feel we should be more vigilant. The recent incidents at the border seem connected. I sense something brewing." Lea said with her arms crossed tightly over her chest.

"You're referring to what happened to Heather? That poor man was desperate. I don't think it means anything."

They were talking about the incident at the Border, my first day, actually. The day that white-eyed man attacked her.

"Well, perhaps. But Heather's been struggling lately... for reasons you're well aware of. I'm not sure she can continue leading the border effectively." Lea sounded frustrated and a bit annoyed. Was she always annoyed?

"Because of Grace?" Kate asked.

Damn it.

"Yes. We need a focused leader here, not a teenager."

Kate tilted her head, relenting. "Alright, I'll check on Heather. But to be honest, I've never seen her this happy before. I'd rather have a happy leader than an angry and frustrated one."

My right foot slipped, and the ladder let out a sharp, metallic screech. Damn it. No, no, no. I clenched my teeth.

"What was that?" I heard Lea say.

"What was what?" Kate's voice.

I held my breath like I didn't need oxygen to live anymore and gripped the ladder, trying to steady myself.

"I'm sure I heard something near the window."

"It might be the wind."

Yes, please. It was the wind, Lea. Listen to Kate.

"No, I'm sure I heard something."

Fuck.

I heard her footsteps approaching. That was it. Nowhere to hide. They were going to catch me. I needed a good excuse and fast. What the hell could I make up?

Lea's head popped out of the window. First, she glanced downward. Then, just as she was about to turn toward me— The border alarm blared.

"What the hell?" Kate said.

Lea spun back inside. "Of course, we can't have a single quiet night around here."

I heard them move.

"Apparently not. Better be quick, Lea."

They rushed off and I stayed as still as a rock, my heart racing a mile a minute. That had been way too close. I swear I even saw my life flash before my eyes for a second. A very boring life, by the way. No idea what happened to the border or who set off the alarm, but I would be extremely, and forever, grateful.

Once I reached the top, I left the repeater behind the lighting blocker and messaged Erik. I followed his instructions and turned it on. A soft green light appeared.

A moment later, I got a message back: "I'm going to transmit the message now, and it will loop for the next 24 hours. Watch for the intermittent light; that means it's working."

I observed the repeater expectantly, and right as he'd just said, the light flickered. The message was being sent, which felt unreal—we had made it. I couldn't help but imagine Michael receiving it. I was sure he would be shocked; he was very expressive and would probably press his lips together and open his eyes wide, as he always did when something seemed surprising or incomprehensible to him. I also imagined his beautiful eyelashes blinking nonstop and a cute smile forming on his face. I really hoped he smiled.

As I made my way down, I caught a glimpse of movement at the tower's window. Lea and Kate, again? Couldn't be, they just left.

I lean over to see who was. It seemed a man. He moved quickly, trying not to make a sound. He opened the Electric Tower register and started digging inside. Then when he turned a faint moonlight passed through his face and I recognized him, Mark.

I stepped forward—crack.

The old ladder beneath me gave way. My balance vanished in an instant. I teetered on the edge, grasping at nothing. Desperation took over. I threw my hands out and caught the window frame, my pulse hammering in my ears.

Panic seized me.

Mark's eyes snapped to mine, his face frozen in shock. How could he not be startled? Confusion flickered across his features, but he did not hesitate.

He dashed toward me and pulled me inside the tower just in time. We stumbled together, both of us falling to the floor in a heap.

"Grace, what the f**k!" Mark said, his breaths ragged.

"Thanks for that, man," I said as I came back from that near-death experience.

"What were you doing out there?"

I hesitated because I mean... I had no reasonable explanation for why I had been perched on the external ladder of the electric tower in the dead of night. I wasn't that creative.

"What about you? What were you doing here?"

I hesitated, because, I mean... I had no reasonable explanation for why I had been perched on the external ladder of the electric tower in the dead of night. I wasn't that creative.

"What about you? What were you doing here?"

Mark fell silent too, mirroring my own lack of an explanation.

"Well, apparently, preventing a free-fall disaster."

Silence again.

"What were you looking for?" I asked. "Maybe I can help you."

Not that I thought I actually knew where they kept everything in there, but I wanted to know what the hell he was doing.

"Sure, I'll spill the beans if you promise to explain why you were out there auditioning for Ninja Acrobat!"

Fair.

I sighed. "Okay. The only thing I can say is that I wasn't doing anything that could harm anyone. I just wanted to communicate with someone."

Mark studied me for a moment. "Your brother?"

Was it that obvious? I nodded.

"I figured it to had to do with that." Mark said. "Don't worry, I won't say a word."

"What about you?"

Mark's expression shifted, and for a second, I caught a flicker of unease in his eyes.

"Well... don't freak out, okay?"

That never meant anything good. "Okay..."

He hesitated. "I've been thinking about... leaving."

I blinked. "Leaving? What do you mean by leaving?"

"I want to go back to The Other Side."

Of all the things I expected, that wasn't one of them. Mark? Mark? I tried to piece together a reason, but nothing made sense. Out of everyone, he was the last person I thought would say that.

"Why?" I asked.

"I feel like there's no place for me here."

His voice was quieter now, and when I looked at him, he had that expression, the one he only ever let slip when he trusted someone enough when he had space to let it show. His eyes were sad, his face deflated, with no joy and no teasing.

"I'm not made to be a Narval Officer," he went on. "Doesn't matter what the Reg Society says. I don't feel like I belong."

"But your family... they're all here."

Mark gave a small, sad smile. "Are they?"

A pause.

"It's complicated, Grace. I don't feel like I'm part of my family anymore."

I exhaled. "I get what it's like to feel out of place. But... I think that might change if you give it time."

Mark shook his head. "Not sure about that. I want to find a sense of purpose, and that doesn't come from a role someone assigns me, no matter how much data they use to deceive us."

He sounded so sure, and that surprised me. Mark never sounded sure about anything, at least, not like this. But as much as I wanted to argue, I kind of understood what he meant.

"Does anyone else know?"

Mark shook his head. "No. You're the first. And I trust you'll keep it secret until the day comes. Promise me?"

I swallowed. "I promise."

He let out a breath like it was a relief to finally tell someone.

"Grace," his voice softened, "thank you, for not judging, for understanding."

"No problem. I'm gonna miss you, though."

Before he could respond, the border alarm blared—again.

"Twice?" I said.

Mark shook his head. "It's been happening a lot lately."

"God, Heather must be freaking out." I could already picture her, probably halfway to the gates by now, moving like a fireball on a mission.

I needed to check on her.

"Mark, I have to go."