"I used to like liquor to get me inspired
But you look so beautiful, my new supplier
I used to like smoking to stop all the thinking
But I found a different buzz
The world is a curse, it'll kill you if you let it"
High Enough-K.flay

A/n: another sad, sad disclaimer. Jeongguk was never going to change. Abuse is a cycle. He was going to apologize and then hurt her again. He never loved Celine. He wants to POSSESS her like an object that can never leave him. Celine is afraid to leave him because she believes he will hurt her, himself, or Jimin.

**********

Everything felt like a dream to Celine.

Instead of riding on the edge of nightmares, she experienced a more serene sleep. Angels resembling friends surrounded and protected her from a sleepless night.

Her night terrors had lulled in the back of her mind.

She had no idea, of the nightmare that had been spiraling within her newly enlightened boyfriend.

The torment that wracked his body, when he walked into their shared apartment after he left the exhibition. After he saw Celine and Jimin together.

How he looked around the home he used to love, and saw images of her. Reminiscing with affection and nostalgia.

When they first moved in, he could never forget the look of awe on her face. How she ran around skipping, and all Jeongguk could do was smile. Because he had finally settled down, and moved in with the girl he knew he wanted to marry.

Walked into the kitchen, running the hands across the marble that had made so many home cooked meals. Laugh as they drank wine and listened to Frank Sinatra, dancing around and not really paying attention to whether the food burned or not. Chasing Celine around the room with a spatula, slapping her until her giggles turned into stomach wracking laughter. Wrapping his arms around her waist and swaying the the music that had stopped playing, but neither were ready to pull away.

He looked into the living room, which was surprisingly where they had their first time together. It was so heated, that they couldn't make it to the bedroom. Jeongguk remembered being completely taken by her, so fucking amazed at how beautiful she was. As they were about to go at it, he remembered choking.

She smiled at him.

He had been with countless girls before, but never had his heart stopped beating. Never had he just wanted to look at her, and caress her instead of fucking. Never had he been so taken by someone in his life.

I love you.

It was the first time he had thought it. The first time he had said it out loud. And it had been the same feeling since.

But suddenly, Jeongguk couldn't imagine himself in those memories anymore. Another man had taken his place. One with silver hair, a softer voice, and an eye smile. One who looked at her like she was the last pink rose on earth. Smiled that fucking smile of his that made everyone fall to his feet. He held her close, and always called her honey. Made sure she was well taken care of before anyone else. He never once ruined any of these moments, and with this man, Celine was happier. Her smile was less forced, and kisses were more frequent.

It was Jimin, moving her in.

It was Jimin, drinking wine and dancing to old tunes with her.

It was Jimin fucking her deeply on his couch. Both panting and wanting more. She moaned out his name, like she had when she slipped up the other day.

The dark haired man smashed a vase, crashing through the image that ran across his mind like reality. Then cleaned up all the glass, so it was like nothing ever happened.

He walked into their room. Their room.  The one memory untainted by him. Where they were supposed to grow old together. Fall asleep in each other's arms every night till the end.

But her vision must have been different. For she preferred another bed. And another man that was not him.

And Jeongguk, fell asleep, with his hand stretched out, and touching nothing but cold sheets. Beckoning for her to come back and be his. Letting his pillow dry his tears as he faced Celine's spot on the bed. Seeing the indent of where she slept and imaging a world where she wouldn't be lying right next to him.

No, she wasn't privy to the torment she caused. Because when she came home, and fell asleep, she barely glanced his way.

In the morning, things were simple.

To Celine, it was any other day, but much better. Infinitesimally better, to be exact.

Jimin had sent her emails he had received, offering her thousands of dollars for art commissions.

She fell in her studio, on the ground. Sobbing tears of joy. That she'd never have to have a Sugar Daddy ever again. After selling herself since 16, she was no longer stuck in the vicious cycle.

She was one step closer to being independent.

One step closer to leaving him.

Bubbling underneath him like a crouched tiger. But when he looked at her, all of the anger seemed to melt away. And left frozen tundras of a dark blue sadness.

Why was I not good enough for you?

He thought to himself, as he watched Celine start to make herself some breakfast. She barely looked his way, a little smile gracing her pink lips.

The man ached inside, burned to say something. His throat was lodged with unspoken words as he stared at the dreadfully beautiful girl, who seemed to have no qualms about her actions. He was waiting, for the quiver of her lip, a look of regret in her eyes. But there was nothing.

Just look at me.

"Did you make coffee?" Jeongguk asked, voice casual even though he was breaking apart from the inside out. Willing her to look at him, to have some humanity.

It was a simple question, one he asked all the time. But it was filled with so many questions and meanings. The dark haired man wanted the girl to feel bad for what she had done. Just anything to make him feel better, like everything they had been through wasn't a lie.

And she did look at him. Finally glancing up from her inconspicuous activities, big eyes enveloping him in their beauty. But they held an unnerving scrutiny.

He felt as if he were a nuisance. It hurt him deeply; cut into him with broken glass. Even though she wasn't doing anything mildly important, he could see the reluctance in her body as she turned to talk to him.

Why did you choose Jimin? My best friend out of all people. Why him?

Her voice came out sharp and cold, eyes blank as she replied to him. Her energetic demeanor completely disappeared at this point.

"No, you usually do it in the morning."

He watched her smirk a little, but it wasn't an amused one. Nothing like how she used to smile at him. She walked to the fridge, grabbing some juice for herself.

What does he have that's better than me? What does he do better than me? What does he have that I don't?

"Well what if I wasn't here? Then you wouldn't have a cup of coffee."

"That is indeed true."

If you weren't here, I wouldn't have much of anything.

There was silence. The man guessed she didn't feel like talking anymore as she sat across the counter from him. Even though she was two feet away, she angled herself so that she wasn't fully in front of him.

A whimper almost left the mans throat, as he watched her form. Her quiet laughs as she looked down at her phone screen. Wishing he could have done something differently, so he could be on the receiving end of her happiness.

But longing, in most cases. Often turned to bitterness. Especially for people with a temper like Jeongguk.

"So, why didn't you invite me to the exhibition you were in? Jin posted a million pictures on Facebook. It's not like I wouldn't find out that everyone went but me." He tried to keep the anger out of his voice, and only leave hurt.

It would have worked.

If he hadn't thought of Jimin's silver head leaning towards her.

She gave him the side eye, chewing on a piece of her bagel. Her words stung as she flung them at him without a second thought.

"Because you hate my artwork. And you don't support me at all with it?"

He winced, knowing that was partly the truth. Unlike Jimin, Jeongguk had paid people to not accept her work.

"I'm sorry you feel that way." Jeongguk said, apologizing to the person who cheated on him the night before.

Nothing mattered, so it took a little less effort to pretend to apologize.

"It's not a feeling Jeongguk, it's the truth."

Like you have any grasp of the concept behind truth.

He took in a breath, holding onto whatever control he had left inside of him.

Be the person she'll regret fucking over.

"Let me try again. I'm sorry I made you feel that way. I still would have liked to go. It would have been a way to prove myself."

She took in a deep breath, fluttering her eyes in an exasperated way. Apparently she was tired of hearing the word sorry pass from his lips.

The man who had never doubted himself, had finally understood what it felt like to be self conscious. It was one of the most uncomfortable feelings. Hating the body and mind you had, and wishing for anyone else's but your own.

He'd never doubted himself before. Everyone loved him. He was the best in everything. Jeongguk had made sure any rise to competition had been pressed down, time after time.

Why else would he have kept her away from everyone for 6 months? To make sure he was the only person in her life. For her to settle down before she saw the real him, and compared that to his insanely kind friends.

Yes, he wanted Celine. But he knew she had what every woman had.

A feeble mind, and an even more grotesquely open heart.

He hadn't known her legs would be so open as well.

Completely envious of what others had around you. It was like poison running through his veins.

He felt stupid.

So stupid. No one had ever bested him before. Out maneuvered him.

He was the cheater, not the cheated on.

And the one relationship he didn't, the girl had outdone him.

If he wasn't so fucking disgusted, he would have been impressed.

"It's fine Jeongguk, you don't have to prove anything to me." She said, taking a sip of her drink. Pink lips that had touched another's clearly visible.

But Jeongguk had another question in mind.

"Did you have fun with Jimin last night?"

She slightly choked, coughing on the juice she had swallowed. Her eyes were wide for a second, before returning to their normal size.

"What?"

Jeongguk wondered how he ever missed it. The way she'd lean forward in interest whenever his name was mentioned. The light in her usually cold eyes, that managed to warm her porcelain face. The light blush that would dust across her cheeks like floating rose petals along a golden lake.

But maybe she hadn't been like that before.

Maybe she only reacted now, because she had fully fallen out of love with Jeongguk.

He laughed, acting like he didn't say anything off color.

"Jimin? He owns the place? And everyone else that you invited but me?"

Finally, she relaxed in her seat. Cracked a smile. Feeling better knowing the man wasn't jabbing at her, but was just curious. It was a simple question. She playfully nudged the mans leg under the table, feeling a little bad that he was the only one not there.

"Please, just let it go. You would have been bored anyways."

For a second she wished they could have been friends. Just friends.

But it was nearly impossible at this point, to go back. To erase all the history between them.

The man just nodded his head, bunny teeth poking from his lips. He looked up at her, with an intensity he had not breached since the first night he laid eyes on her.

It was the same look.

Of wonder. At the girl who held more mysteries than the night sky.

This is the girl of my dreams.

"You know I love you right?"

The brunette pursed her lips, cat eyes becoming increasingly more glassy. They both knew the answer to that question. And for a second, he was reminded of the girl she used to be.

You used to love me, and now you don't. Like the flutter of a humming birds wing, it was too swift and majestic to actually see.

Did I imagine it?

"Yes, yes I know."

It was the first time that Jeongguk noticed, that she did not say the words back. She backed out of her chair, letting Jeongguk sit frozen as she put her items in the sink. Her footsteps disappeared as she fell back into the confines of her studio.

The man was in complete and utter agony.

She will not leave me.

I will not allow it.

He had to play the part of a perfect boyfriend. Wallow in his own self pity as he pretended not to know. Make her feel sorry for even attempting to deny him.

He could see it now, the glare she thought she could hide as she looked down on him. The arrogant way she walked as if to say "fuck you, I'm fucking your best friend." The way she was so distant, and barely even talked to him.

And even though he knew exactly why, he bit his tongue.

He was waiting,

Thinking of the best way to hurt them, as much as they hurt him.

Even if he had found out the first night. Even if she had regretted everything. Even if she had tried to break up with him.

He would've never let it go. Her. Celine was his and always will be.

Slutty ways and all.

What hurt Jeongguk more than that, was the fact he was so pathetic that he still wanted to keep Celine for himself. After all she had done, he had no pride left to push her away.

As much as he wanted to hurt her, he never wanted to let her decide when she would cast him away.

To Unknown:
Hurry up with her background check. I'll pay you more. Also, check up on Park Jimin as well.

To Jeongguk:
Don't worry boss, we've found everything that you could possibly need. But the Park records will cost you extra, he has more security.

To Unknown:
Consider it done.

Jeon Jeongguk had lost the battle,

But he was going to win the war.

***********

"Why did you choose to go to a park on the hottest day of the season?" Asked Jimin, wiping the sweat off his brow.

Yoongi nodded his head, looking like a panting dog as his tongue hung out of his mouth.

They were in a park found in the outskirts of the city. Large trees swayed in time to the warm breeze, and flowers bloomed in colorful rainbows. It was like a happy pill had been distributed around the city. People walked their dogs with the pep in their steps. Children ran around screaming, playing with soccer balls.

Despite the heat, Jimin couldn't suppress his fairly happy mood. All morning he had been congratulated on his exhibition. People of great business ventures wouldn't stop talking about Celine.

It made him beyond proud. He couldn't wait to see her in person, so that he could see the smile on her face. Her worries had been mute. Instead, she has blossomed into the success of her own creations.

Jimin was brought out of his day dreams when Taehyung giggled, clapping his hands together, "Because I'm hanging out with Park Jimin, get it? Because his last name is Park, and we are at a park?"

Yoongi stopped walking, giving Taehyung a death glare. The sandy haired brunette didn't falter, just smiled widely back in return.

"The only thing I get is that you have a death wish. As in I'm going to kill you." Said the angry blonde.

Jimin had to cover his mouth from laughter as he watched Tae's excited expression turn into a pout.

"Oh come on, stop being so pessimistic. And Jimin, I don't expect this sort of complaining from you either! Where is my little sunshine?" The model like man asked, standing in front of his two friends.

"Currently melting, in piles of despair." Jimin replied jokingly, as he pretended to faint into his equally tall blonde friend.

Yoongi gasped, catching the other man,"Quick call 911. He had no pulse."

Taehyung stuck out his tongue, pretending not to be amused.

"Ugh, you guys suck. We haven't hung out just the three of us in ages. Can't you try to have fun."

"I'm sorry Tae, anything for you."

The man clapped his hands together, thankful for his silver haired companion. Yoongi shrugged, as he looked at his two goofy friends.

"I like Jimin, so I'll try too."

The rest of the time, they walked around the park. Taehyung asked them to model for him, so he could put them on his website. It resulted in Yoongi and Jimin getting into a wrestling fight by accident after the latter got mud on the blonde man's shoe.

Afterwards, they decided they would walk back into the city and visit some shops. They went to Gucci, where Taehyung at least spent 3,000. They visited more clothing places, but nothing really stood out to the smaller man.

He kept glancing at his phone, waiting for a text back from a certain person.

The three men were walking back to Tae's car after getting dinner, all laughing wildly. Yoongi was explaining the story of how he accidentally sent nudes to his girl friend's mom. Taehyung and Jimin were dying, grabbing onto each other because they could barely walk.

But then, Jimin stopped walking. He was distracted by a large sign that hung prettily outside of a rustic looking building.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a the name of the cafe.

Celine's Cafe. Like the ones he had seen in France.

He didn't even notice, that Taehyung and Yoongi had stopped walking as well. Surrounding him on either side.

"Wow, you really do love-" Began the man with a deep voice.

Jimin outwardly groaned, childishly stomping a foot on the ground. His large lips puffed out as Taehyung stopped talking in complete surprise. It was so out of character for the cute, and slightly smaller man.

"What is UP with everyone saying that to me? Like yes, I'm fully aware I'm uncontrollably and delusion-ally in with Kim Celine! Yes, playboy Park Jimin who only fucks girls actually has feelings for someone. Wild! Whenever I see her I get butterflies. When she smiles I literally can feel my heart beat out of my chest, and I feel whole again. She's the most amazing, funny, beautiful, and smart person I've ever met. And maybe, just maybe I want to settle down with her and have a bunch of kids, with my eyes and her smile, but it's just a thought! But the thing is she'll never love me back."

The riled up man finished with an exaggerated sigh, barely even able to breath. The truth of his words stated him right in the face. Taehyung was still shocked, still totally confused by what he said. Yoongi stood smirking behind his silver haired friend, hands across his chest.

Holy shit, I'm in deep.

"Jimin?" Said Taehyung, gently nudging the man who was now staring deeply at the ground.

He snapped, looking up at his tan friend.

"What?!"

"I was talking about the painting." The wide eyed man said, gesturing to a Monet piece that hung in the window's frame.

"Well why don't you just-wait what?" Jimin immediately heated up at the statement, his entire face and neck turning red. Too late, he had realized his stupid ass mistake. He had unknowingly let another person in on his terrible secret.

"I wasn't talking about Celine. I actually wasn't even aware you were into her. But damn. Yoongi what do you think?" The brunette asked, turning to the silent friend.

Yoongi nodded his head, speaking as if he were analyzing a novel.

"The speech started off a little rocky, but got more organized towards the end. I really liked how you added the whole "baby" aspect, it will really capture the heart of everyone. Overall, an Oscar winning performance."

Jimin's cheeks burned with shame. He slapped a hand onto his forehead, forcefully tugging on his hair. He avoided the stares of his friends.

He didn't want to see the look of approval on Yoongi's face, who didn't particularly like Jeongguk. It would make him feel less guilty about the whole situation.

He didn't want to see the look of disapproval on Tae's face, who was also very close to Jeongguk. It would make him feel ten times worse.

"I'm done for."

Yoongi sighed, clapping the pretty boy on the back.

"You're also a fucking idiot, but that was really fun to watch."

"So let me get this straight, you're in love with your best friend's girlfriend? How the fuck did that happen?"

Yoongi nodded his head, also wanting to know the details. He knew that Jimin had feelings, but never knew how they truly came about or if they had been acted on.

"If I tell you, you have to promise not to say anything." Jimin said, finally looking up at them.

They could see the guilt and longing on his face. This wasn't just some stupid mistake.

It was way more than that.

"Okay." Taehyung said, trying to not be judge-mental about the situation. It would be hard, but it was worth the try for the kind hearted man.

"If Tae won't tell, I won't either. He's got a big ass mouth, so speak." Yoongi said blankly. The brunette slapped him, but he barely budged.

Jimin shook his head, spilling everything to his two friends. Who knew that it was a mistake to tell more people, but the damage had already been done.

"Y'all are fucking? Oh my god Jimin! What the fuck? What about Jeongguk?"  Said Taehyjng, unable to hold back his reaction. The man rarely got upset by anything, but this was too much.

He never expected Jimin to do anything like this.

And the silver haired man knew it. He cast his head down, unable to meet the cocoa brown eyes that stared back at him with disgust.

"I know. I know it's bad. But I can't seem to stop myself."

His words were quiet, voice small. And Taehyung softened, somehow finding the old Jimin within him. The man had never been one to hurt a person in purpose. Never hurt a person at all.

And the fact that he was, showed that Celine was more than just a lustful need. Somewhere, the man felt this girl was important enough to risk the fiendship between him and Jeongguk.

"You're not doing this to be petty. I can tell your feelings are sincere. But to risk everything for a girl who may not love you back? Is that the smartest idea?"

"Maybe not. But I would do anything for her. And I know she loves me, at least in the friend-type way."

Taehyung shook his head, staring at the shorter man. Jimin had a cross between denial and hope running across his doll-like face.

"This isn't going to end well. Someone is going to get hurt. I don't want it to be you." He said, feeling his own sorrow fill him.

The man wasn't an idiot. He watched the way Jeongguk treated the older boy sometimes. The way he carelessly used his selflessness for his own gain. Jimin would smile, as Jeongguk would take and never give.

And even now, Jimin wasn't trying to get back at his youngest friend.

He had simply fallen in love.

"Don't worry about me Tae. I'll be okay."

Yoongi entered the conversation, after deliberating what he had been informed on.

"I believe it will work out. I saw the way she looked at you Jimin, I don't think you have to worry about her feelings."

But Jimin couldn't help but do exactly that.

It was the doubt. The little voice in the back fo his head. In movies, friends with benefits always ended up falling for one another.

But Jimin wasn't stupid, he knew that this was real life. And there was a possibility that she was attracted to him, but not romantically into him.

It was obvious that she cared about him.

"You're my favorite person."

She had said those words to me.

But it could have meant something completely different to her. He could be twisting it in his mind to make it seem like she had feelings too. It was hard to tell. Without communication, he would never know how she truly felt.

Jimin, he's the friend. The one who is always there for her. The one who comforts her about Mia and her parents.

But was he the one she loved?

"Impossible Yoongi."

The man smiled, one that reached his eyes. Offering comfort to Jimin. The man never sugar coated anything, and he could count on the blonde man to be honest.

"Don't seek yourself short kid. Even if she doesn't love you, she doesn't love Jeongguk." He said matter of factly.

Jimin scoffed, looking at the man with an incredulous expression. He could feel the pit of jealousy bubbling inside him unwillingly. It was bitter thinking, but he couldn't help but feel as if it were true.

How could she not love Jeongguk? He was better than Jimin. Everyone knew it.

"But she's staying with him, despite everything. And she's never once said she wanted to leave him, or that she had feelings for me."

If she didn't love him, why is she still with him?

"Trust me, I know when someone is faking a smile. And whenever she's around him, she looks scared."  The bleach haired man stated, shaking his head. His small cat eyes were full of unbiased wisdom, but still Jimin could barely grasp it.

"Scared?"

His whole body tensed. Taehyung gently placed his hand on the man, trying to calm him down. If Jeongguk made the girl feel scared, he would do anything to pull her away from the situation. Screw everything and everyone else.

Yoongi noticed his stiff stature, and the way he man's hands were balled into fists. The man cleared his throat, trying to find better words to explain himself. But Taehyung shook his head, gesturing to Yoongi to let him speak.

He turned the silver haired man around, and embraced him in a hug.

The once angry man, was now in shambles within his friend's arms. The blonde came up behind him, also rubbing the silver haired man's back.

Yoongi and Taehyung stared at each other, completely heart broken. They didn't know what to do.

Jimin had rarely broken his beautiful smile around them. The only two times they'd ever seen him cry was when he'd one an award in an art show, and when his dad told him to not show up for Christmas.

Sobs filled the air, and the three men avoided the looks they got from people on the sidewalk. They just wanted to make sure their friend was okay.

"I know Jimin, we love her too. She's like a little sister. We wouldn't let anything bad happen to her. You guys are just kids really. Stupid kids who made a mistake, and will one day have to pay for it. But we'll try to make it painless as possible. But have hope, like Yoongi said, things might work out in the end." Taehyung said, hoping to console him.

Jimin pulled away, eyes and face completely wet with tears. His lips and eye lids had swelled from all the crying.
Yoongi quickly swiped under Jimin's eyes, making the sad man smile with gratitude.

But the fear inside of him ceased to relent.

"I hope they do."

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(A/N): IM ALMOST AT 10k READS WHOOP WHOOP!!!!!

I'm sorry if this chapter seemed pointless, but I really want to develop the relationships between the characters.

Are Tae, Yoongi, and Jimin friend goals or what?

What do you thinking Jeongguk is trying to find? Will he confront Jimin and Celine?

Can y'all recommend good stories on here? I feel like I've read everything 😂😂😂 All members of BTS stories are welcome suggestions.

Also thanks for reading! Please remember to vote and comment! And if you're a ghost reader, that's fine too. I love you all! 😇😎