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Chapter 13 - Icarus

"Did you see Clara?" Daniel inquired when he found Mirela practicing shooting in the field.

"No, since you ran after her. I thought you were together"

The girl laid the gun on the bench while staring at him. Daniel was worried. But why? Mirela was sure there was more story than Nana had told her about Daniel having met Clara after an attack by troopers. Hundreds of questions swirled in her mind. Why he was there if the camp was far from the village? Why bring her secretly?

"What did you do this time?" she was sharp, narrowing her eyes to read the guy's thoughts.

"I promise I'll tell you later. But please, I need your help to find Clara."

"All right. I'll look at the places I know she hangs out for," she said and ran out into the building.

Mirela looked for her in the courtyard where she stayed with the children, but they told her they had not seen her that day. She went to the auditorium, cafeteria, locker room, all the places she could remember, even in the unused wing, but nothing. Clara was nowhere.

She went back down the hall to the infirmary where Nana and Daniel were.

"I've looked everywhere for her, even in the auditorium where she usually stays with the children, but I didn't find her."

Both women stared at Daniel as waiting for an answer.

"I think you'd better tell me exactly what happened, Daniel," Mirela demanded, crossing her arms and staring at him.

He hesitated, looking to the women waiting for an explanation he seemed to debate whether he could give. That hesitation caused Mirela to nudge her arm while making a gesture of 'we're waiting'. After a long sigh, he finally said:

"She remembered the night I met her."

Why was he being so careful to talk about it? Should not he be glad she finally remembered something?

"And?" Mirela arched an eyebrow. She felt deep inside she might not like the remaining story.

"The trouble is, she only remembered the part where I... I..." he hesitated, examining Mirela, as measuring the words. "I attacked her."

"You what?!"

"Calm down! I didn't mean to hurt her, Mirela! I swear!" Daniel stepped back when she lunged at him, even with Nana between them.

"Are you insane?" cried Mirela, unbelieving and again trying onslaught against Daniel. What's wrong with him? How could he lie to Clara all this time? How could he take advantage of her memory loss? What did he want with that? It was too cruel even for the Governor!

"Calm down, my dear," Nana said, taking her by the shoulders and making Mirela stare at her. "Let him explain"

There was a glint in her eyes. When she calmed down, put some distance between them and with folded arms, waited for the explanation.

"I didn't mean to hurt her, Mirela." and with a sorry smile, Daniel continued: "And I couldn't, even if I had the chance."

"Why not?"

He stared at her, his eyes bright in emotion and declared, letting his arms drop to his sides:

"Because she's my wife, Mirela."

"Your... what?" said the girl, gaping and her eyes so wide she was sure they could jump out of their sockets any moment. "But... she... died three years ago, didn't she?"

Nana explained briefly what happened that night. "It seems that Clara didn't remember everything but Daniel grabbing her. We don't know what she can do..."

A thousand thoughts crossed Mirela's mind. That was the craziest story she ever heard and maybe Clara would be safer away from Daniel. Yet, Nana was the most honest and wise person she knew.

"We have to find Clara before she does something stupid." stated Mirela. "If that is the part she remembers, she won't be around you or anyone else here."

Suddenly everyone looked at each other understanding how bad the situation was. Daniel and Mirela hurried off in the same direction as Nana tried to follow them in the slowest pace. The rain was heavy outside, and the corridors were crowded, slowing them.

They arrived at the dormitory where Mirela immediately headed for the small closet with bad feelings.

"Clara ran away," she turned to Daniel showing the inside of the wardrobe almost empty. "And took my stuff!"

Daniel strode into the small room, searching, trying to find out where she might have gone. His eyes searched the room when a piece of paper, under one bed, caught his attention. He picked it up, unfolded it and saw it was a map drawn with charcoal of the whole cell complex.

"She must have drawn it." Mirela stood next to him and looked over the detailed map. "What is this?" she asked, pointing to a spot next to the cafeteria, identified with an X.

Daniel glanced up from the paper with a twinkle in his eyes that Mirela had not seen since he'd approached her on the training field.

"That's where she must have gone." He smiled proudly. "She is smart."

"What is this place? Where does it end? Mirela did not even know there was that corridor after the kitchen.

"The old garbage. It was used to discard the rubbish, but obviously it has not been used since the great epidemic. This place goes to an old street, understand?"

Then Mirela understood. Yes, Clara was smart. She knew the Cell much better than her who had lived there all along.

"Where are you going?" she asked Daniel, who was walking to the door and only gave a 'what do you think' look. "But how do you know which way she went?"

"With this storm, she'll not be able to go so far away and will need a shelter."

Daniel looked out the window with such confidence that Mirela did not understand. Did he have superpowers? It would be like finding a needle in a haystack! She tried to say it, but when she looked again, Daniel was gone.

Clara walked for a few hours until she found the hidden house. The same place she had been in the days before she was attacked. It was the same way she'd left it the night she'd gone to the village, the remnants of the fire now soaked by heavy rain, just as the bottle that was dropped around.

It was amazing how close she had been to the Cell in those days, but it had never crossed her mind that there was a complex like that. Nana was right: it was a place whose location remained unknown to anyone and especially, to the Government.

Walking carefully to avoid stepping on the traps she had set up, Clara skirted the house and entered it. She was completely drenched and felt cold. Inside, she left the backpack and the bow near the entrance. headed for a pile of wood in a corner of the kitchen for such a rainy situation and made a small bonfire in the center of the room. She took off her wet clothes, twisted and hang them on an old chair by the fire, hoping they would dry a little. Thus, she retrieved clean, dry clothes from the backpack a little big for her. Clara laid down on the bed, warming herself in the heat of the burning fire after she had moved some boards away from the window, so the smoke could escape.

As soon as she settled herself on the old, lumpy mattress, her thoughts turned to Daniel. Although she had not yet remembered the previous years, being married to him helped to understand her feelings, to name them. She was in love with him. She remembered his black eyes and how he had looked at her scared when he had attacked her as if he had seen a ghost. After, he looked with concern when she had been hit by the government soldiers, and finally, when he returned to the Cell, his gaze was clear to her now: a mixture of fascination, relief, and happiness.

But then, as easy as the memories of Daniel came to her, the Marisol's hit her with no mercy. That girl was so in love with him as Clara and it was unfair stay between them. It was too much to ask him to stay alone after three years thinking his wife had died. He had to move on, begin a new life and that was what he did. Clara was sure it was the best decision: she had to stay out of his way, leave him free to be happy with whoever he had chosen, so he did not feel trapped by a bond of the past that might have been overcome. With these thoughts and a great melancholy, Clara fell asleep at the sound of the storm outside.

She woke up later in a jolt; the rain had already subsided, and now it was just like a lazy drizzle. But it was not the sound of the rain that had awakened her, but another. Of someone walking around the house, stepping on some broken porcelain and glass she had found there and scattered outside. She took the bow and the quiver beside the bed and put on her boots still wet. Noiseless, she went to the window to spot the intruder and sneaked out through the kitchen door.

Clara stepped into the wood and crouched, waiting until the stranger appeared in her eye line with bow and arrow ready to shoot.

"Clara!" she heard Daniel shout, seeing only his boots walking around the house. "I know you're here!" he continued looking through the windows cracks. "I don't want to do you any harm, just talk..."

Daniel stopped a few feet from where Clara was crouching. The moment she saw him, she felt her heart skip a bit. Wet by the rain, his hair was a mess now, a lovely mess. Even from that distance she could see the black of his eyes searching for her all over the place. Hot and cold crossed her body, to breathe was a difficult task that moment.

"Please... Listen to what I have to say and then..." he dropped his arms at his side and sighed. "You may leave if you wish."

Clara's hands sweat and trembled, while her thoughts also mingled. Mad at herself, she shot an arrow that landed just a few inches from Daniel's foot which dragged his attention to where she was hidden.

"Go away, Daniel," she was tired of fighting against all the feelings and thoughts he caused her. She stood up and stared at him.

"Clara, I..." he faced her unable to disguise the emotion he felt for having found her again. "I have so much to tell you, to explain."

Clara stepped out of the tall grass and into the courtyard where Daniel stood. His stare was so intense that she had to look away or she won't be able to say everything she had rehearsed in her mind.

"I never meant to do you any harm that night. I know it was weird the way I approached you, but when I get close to you it's difficult to act natural. That night, as I observed you walk down that street in the moonlight, for a minute I doubted my sanity and thought you might be a ghost who had returned to haunt me and then..." he paused, taking a small step in her direction; she moved away. "I had to touch you to make sure I hadn't gone crazy... I spent three years learning to live without you and then... when I had given up and left everything behind, you reappeared." he reached out an arm, trying to touch her face, but Clara turned away, staring at the floor. Her breath was as choppy as his. "Please don't go away... not again..." Daniel finished, dropping his arm to his side as if surrendering.

Clara stood next to him and realized as his eyes brightened, a silent plea accompanying his last words. With great effort, she said,

"I can't Daniel." and seeing his wounded expression, she continued quickly. "I can't just get you out of a life you had built during this time. You made friends, you became one of the Cell's leaders, and..." That was the worst part but taking a deep breath she continued "You have Marisol who loves you. It's not fair you leave all this behind due to a commitment from the past. Maybe I'm not the same person, Daniel." Clara finished, dropping her bow to the floor and looking away. "I don't even know who I am."

"I don't care, Clara," Daniel reduced the little distance existing between them. "You may not be the same person... You're better than I remember. I thought I'll never feel like this again and believe me, I fought hard to keep away from you, to continue with the life I built up as you said, but... I can't. I just can't stay without you. I already lost you once and I'll not let it happen again, Clara. I would skip everything I built these years if I could stay even five minutes with you. It would have been worth it." he finished, looking at her so intensely that Clara felt she could melt at any moment. His eyes glinted with the purest love.

Tears streamed down her face merging with thick raindrops as she kept her eyes closed tight. Everything she had rehearsed for a life without Daniel at the moment she had fled was vanishing in the air.

"Clara? Why are you crying?"

"Don't you understand?" she sobbed. "No matter how many times I die and return from the dead or how often I lose my memory... it will always be you, Daniel. Every time I meet you, I will fall in love again and again and again..."

"Oh, Clara... I love you so much, so much, so much..." Daniel finished the sentence with a sigh as his lips finally met hers in a warm and passionate kiss.

Clara felt as if her body could melt at any moment, overwhelmed by the power of the feelings. Daniel's mouth sought hers with the same urgency as Clara lost her self-control. There was no point fighting back the obvious: she was madly in love. Their body so close, holding each other so tight as they could merge into one creature built of love, of passion. Their tongues curled in a synchronized ballet allowing Clara to feel all Daniel's taste, mixed with his scent: mint, wet, and Daniel.

The intensity of that kiss was diminishing until Daniel rested his forehead on Clara's, as breathless as she was and touching his nose against hers in a gentle caress.

"I missed you so much..." he laid a gentle kiss on her lips, their fingers interlaced.

"Me too."

In silence, both walked into the house while a pouring rain was falling outside. Clara was happy. Somehow, she realized that was a feeling she had not felt for a long time. Hand in hand with Daniel, she smiled. He stopped in the middle of the room and turned to her, gazing her from head to toe. That simple gesture gave her butterflies in the stomach. An icy and hot sensation, urgent as well, took hold of her when she saw the T-shirt sticking to his chest, tracing the muscles under it. She looked up at the neck where she could discreetly see a pulsating vein; his square jaw, the well-shaped mouth whose lower lip he bit, his nose long and thin. Finally, the darker eyes she had ever seen, staring back, serious, focused in one place: she.

Daniel took a step towards her. He cupped her face in his hands, placing a strand of hair behind her ear; a warm trail had formed all the way where he had touched. Then he pulled her to him nibbling her lips, almost driving her crazy, totally surrendered to all sensations that only Daniel was capable of. Again, he kissed her cradling her by the nape with one hand while the other went up and down slowly by her body and reach her waist; the kiss becoming firmer and hotter until it became urgent. The urgency that seemed to consume both in the same intensity. Clara pulled him closer and closer, hooking her fingers in the belt loops of his pants.

She gripped him firmly on his back, scraping it over his T-shirt as Daniel began to lower his warm, sweet lips down her face and neck and then rise again, lightly nibbling her ear. An uncontrolled desire took hold of Clara, that for a second, turned away from Daniel as if trying to catch her breath. She ripped off his T-shirt and stared in amazement at him. The muscles, working with his short breaths, made her rest a hand on his chest, sliding her index finger slowly along the path of his muscles. She felt when Daniel stiffened at that touch, holding his breath as he closed his eyes and let his head fall back. Clara was amazed by that scene, with his shape in the soft light of the fire.

She raised her hand again and this time, Daniel held hers next to his heart. Clara could feel it was beating as madly as her own as if both had run the marathon. With her free hand, she pulled him by the nape, kissing on his neck, cheeks, chin until she reached his lips. She stood back, observing him while Daniel remained closed-eyed. When he opened them, Clara saw something different and sweeping: her desire reflected in his eyes, burning as hot as the red-hot iron she had applied over her wound. Coming out of the trance, Daniel again pulled her to him, taking her mouth deep and deep into a deep kiss as he lifted her by the hips; Clara was fastening her legs firmly around him.

With a nimble movement, he ripped off her tank top, taking her mouth again and going down, down while Clara leaned back. Her fingers sliding through his soft hair, eyes closed, letting herself simply be consumed by all that burning fire. 

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