(Credit to BethHarkness for putting this on her profile.) (It is also slightly edited for profanity)

I didn't choose the fandom life. The fandom life grabbed me by the hand and whispered 'run'.

I didn't choose the fandom life. The fandom life told me to come to 221B baker street if convenient and if inconvenient come anyway.

I didn't choose the fandom life. The fandom life retconned me then recruited me.

I didn't choose the fandom life,the fandom life pulled my name out of a glass bowl and forced me to join.

I didn't choose the fandom life, the fandom life put a great glowing holographic sign over my head and claimed me.

I didn't choose the fandom life, the fandom life sent me a letter by owl addressed to me in emerald green ink.

I didn't choose the fandom life the fandom life came to my door and told me that 'Dad's on a hunting trip and he hasn't been home in a few days'.

I didn't choose the fandom life, the fandom life sorted me into it's house.

I didn't choose the fandom life, but I'm glad the fandom life chose me.
-----------------------------------------

I only recognized 6 of these. How many did you recognize?