"Can we get you anything else?"

Spencer and Grayson stand at the end of Drayton's bed with eager to Please smiles. Drayton's chest rises and falls with a loud sigh, my head resting on his firm pecs while my fingers graze the raised scar from his bullet wound under the blankets.

"No thanks Spencer. It's been three weeks, I don't need a personal maid anymore," Drayton replies, his hand that's wrapped around me plays with my hair, the strands tickling my shoulders.

Spencer has blamed herself for what happened in Miami and unofficially made herself some sort of maid, fetching Drayton food, offering to do his laundry. She even paid for a personal masseuse to come once a week. It's a little weird but she doesn't know how else to earn his forgiveness, even though he's told her countless times that there's nothing to forgive.

Truthfully, I'd harboured a little bit of bad blood towards her for a while. I never said anything but I felt like if it hadn't been for her irresponsibility, we'd have never been at the hotel. But then of course, I realised that we all had our own part in it. If I hadn't been drunk and irrational, we wouldn't have been arguing in that room. I couldn't place blame on her, if I wasn't willing to put it on me as well.

"Let me know if you need anything else?" She smiles. Grayson leads her out of the room, giving us an apologetic smile over his shoulder before he shuts the door.

The muscles that I lay on, relax. A breath of relief tousles the hair on top of my head and I snuggle further into the sheets before I pick my phone up and check the home screen for emails.

"Relax cheer. You'll hear from them soon."

A few days after we'd come home from Miami, I'd had to leave for California for the CalArts audition. I'd hated leaving Drayton while he was bed bound and recovering, but the audition wasn't something I'd ever miss. Nathan came with me, as we'd originally planned and not to my surprise but definitely to my horror, he'd managed to score two Californian girls in the thirty hours that we were there. It's honestly a wonder that he hasn't knocked someone up or contracted genital herpes at this point.

The audition went perfectly. Or so I hope anyway. I didn't mess a step during my routine and while the judges had a good poker face, they'd seemed impressed. I expected to hear whether I've been accepted any day now and the anxiety is killing me.

"I know," I throw the phone further down the bed and huff. "I'm just nervous."

"There's no need to be," his voice is muffled as he speaks into my hair, pecking my head lightly between his words. "You're going to get in."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence babe."

"Anytime."

I prop up on my elbow and give him a kiss. Just one of the many that I continuously shower him with every day. And without failure, his grasp around me tightens, letting me know that he feels the exact same way.

"First day back at school tomorrow." I tuck the sheet tighter around my chest and meet Drayton's green eyes. "There's a lot of rumours flying around."

Drayton had taken a decent leave from school so that he could recover, but it's Monday tomorrow and his first official day back since the incident in Miami. I'll admit that I'd skipped an abhorrent amount of days in the last three weeks. I couldn't help it. Drayton would snap chat me, curled up in his big bed, all alone and the next thing I knew I'd be curled up beside him. Truthfully I haven't spent much time at home. So much so that Nathan actually said he misses me when I briefly popped in two nights ago.

"I bet there are," Drayton drawls with a dismissive roll of his eyes. He's no stranger to rumours and the way they can spread like wildfire. "What's the craziest one you've heard so far?"

"Easy," I answer without missing a beat. "That I caught you cheating and shot you."

Drayton bursts into a loud laughter, his body rumbling beneath me as his head falls back against the pillows. "Fuck, that's hilarious." He sighs with a satisfied huff as his chuckling slowly subsides. "I'd actually believe that."

"Yeah.. watch yourself." I pretend to shoot him an evil glare which I fail to hold in place because his gorgeous smirk is just too mesmerising to the point where I giggle and run my hands along the crevices of his hardened abdominal muscles.

"I should probably go home," I pout. Truthfully, there's nowhere I'd rather be. But I did promise Nathan that we'd have dinner tonight, considering I've barely seen him since we got back from California.

"Can I pick you up for school in the morning?" The sheets fall away from us as Dray sits up and tousles his bed hair, absolutely stripping me of the will to keep my self-control intact because his biceps flex, weakening me the way they always seem to.

My leg hooks over his waist so that I'm straddling his magnificent torso and without failure his hands spread out on my waist, gripping me while his brightened eyes devour me. He doesn't need verbal reassurance, by now our bodies react to each other on-demand, synchronising in perfect harmony to each other's needs and wants.

"I've got like.. an extra half n hour before I have to go," I murmur against his hot mouth. We've been lying in bed all day like a pair of squallers and yet fate would have it that he doesn't stink and his breath is perfect. I once again have to conclude that he's not human. Especially not with the way his hands feel when they travel up the length of my back, the tips of his fingers travelling the bumps of my spine before they tangle in the mattered hair at the base of my neck.

At the risk of sounding egotistical, it's an absolute blessing that I can appear halfway to homeless and he still regards me with the most lust infused expression that I've ever seen. How did I get so damn lucky?

"Oh and I'd love a ride on the bike tomorrow morning." I giggle against his small smile and revel in the feeling of his tongue flicking out and caressing my bottom lip.

"That's where you belong baby." His voice is deep and gravelly as he wraps his entire arm around my back and grips my waist, throwing me down into the mattress so that we've switched positions in one swift movement that causes a flip flop in my stomach. "On the back of my bike"- he dips in and kisses my throat - "with your arms around me"- another kiss is placed lower - "that's where my girl belongs."

I'm torn between wanting to listen further to the sweet nothings that he murmurs against my throat and wanting to tell him to shut the hell up and take me. These are the only kinds of warring emotions that I ever want to feel when it comes to this man.

• • •

"So are the nightmares still recurring?"

A deep sigh of boredom leaves my lips as I readjust my legs, the leather beneath them feels slippery and I curse the fact that the weather is getting so warm already.

This is my fourth counselling session with Helen Kit. She's the only qualified therapist in our little Archwood and Nathan had ordered that I either see her, or head out of town and seek someone else in one of the neighbouring cities. Either way, I was going to talk about the Miami ordeal until I felt better.

"Nightmares are normal." I shrug, brushing off the fact that almost every night when I close my eyes, I see someone shooting my boyfriend. Sometimes he lives, sometimes I wake up before it's determined and sometimes he dies. My most peaceful nights are the ones that he holds me close. "I'd be more concerned if I wasn't having nightmares. I watched my boyfriend stab two people and get shot."

"I agree. It's a normal reaction." Helen smiles, jotting something down in her book of secrets. "I am curious as to how you handle the nightmares and how you get through the flashbacks that occur day to day."

"I do my best not to think about it in all honesty. The way I see it, is that what happened was horrific, it's affected me. But Drayton's actions saved my life. I dunno. I can't change anything and it could have been worse."

"So you're rationalising it?"

"If that's what you call it, I guess."

"Do you still blame yourself for Drayton getting shot."

Ugh, it's the same question that she asks every time. I'd made the mistake of admitting that I took responsibility for his gun wound. If I had run as soon as he told me to, he might have got off completely unharmed. But my feet had stayed glued to the spot in absolute terror.

"I don't see why that's relevant." I sit forward, so that I'm on the edge of the couch, allowing some air to hit the back of my hot legs and smooth my school skirt. "I was the reason he got shot. Plain and simple. It's neither here nor there."

"It's not healthy to carry around that kind of blame," she informs me with an unwavering stare. This might be the worst thing about therapists, the lack of emotion. I can't relate to her at all, I don't feel understood. Are they all this devoid of basic human relations? "Drayton doesn't blame you. He said he'd do it again."

"Isn't it illegal for you to share what's said in your sessions?"

The smallest hint of a smile lifts her thin lips as she directs her glance to the book in her lap. "I know that he's told you the same thing to your face, Dallas. I'm technically not sharing anything that you don't already know."

"The way you reacted in that situation is completely normal," she continues, bringing her gaze back to mine as she laces her fingers together in her lap. "You'll find that most people would have frozen in such a situation. The way Drayton handled it, is something to marvel. He took a life and a bullet..  for you-"

"Aren't you supposed to be helping? Not making it worse?" The silence of the room is only thwarted by the padding of my foot, tapping the carpet at a fast pace so that I don't go absolutely ballistic. Talk about adding salt to the wound.

"I'm not sugar-coating it dear. He did something that will forever change his life and that has to register some kind of emotion from you. What I want-" she drops the book from her lap, onto the floor as she leans forward -"is for that emotion not to be a negative one. It'll affect your life and your relationship."

"Okay so how do I not feel guilty over it?"

"You start by accepting that you're a human being and movie-like heroism and reactions aren't an everyday occurrence. You accept that your reaction doesn't mean that it's your fault."

"Easier said than done".

After the session, I sit on the sidewalk while I wait for Drayton so that we can go to school together. As always I feel as though someone's assaulted all of my emotions, sucking them in and spitting them out. Drayton is going through the exact same thing, the intense sessions with Helen often leave him a little bit frustrated, but neither of us discusses them in much detail. I do know that Dray suffers from the nightmares too though. I'm often woken by him thrashing and drenched in heavy sweats. Sometimes he calls my name in distress and I hate to think what's going on behind those closed lids. I always ask the next morning but he never tells me, claiming that he doesn't remember.

That or he's trying to spare me from the horror that he's enduring.

The roar of his bike can be heard before he's even come into view, but when he does, it's like I can relax again. A breath I'm not even aware that I'm holding is released, a knot of tension in my stomach unravels and my heart seems to beat a little more steady. Ever since that night, being apart from him is harder than it ever has been. I'm not sure that it's healthy to feel so dependent and I've never been that way before. But I can't help the relief that courses through me every time he's near me again.

The bike comes to a stop beside the sidewalk and he flicks the stand down in an effortless motion. It feels as though some normality might be seeping back into our lives, riding the bike to school was something we'd done every day before he was shot and it's a small but monumental activity that resembles how things haven't totally changed when we both went through something totally life-altering.

"Hey baby," he flicks the shield of his helmet up and leans down so I can peck his nose before I fetch my own headgear from the back compartment, "good session?"

"It was fine!" I speak with a louder voice so that I can compete with the thunderous idling engine. Once we're situated, he flicks the shield down again and revs the bike, lurching us forward and speeding us towards the direction of school.

It's hardly surprising that the attention we gain upon arrival is worse than it's ever been before. And that's saying something considering it's Drayton and ogling eyes comes with the territory. Almost as soon as our feet hit the ground, he's swarmed with members of the football team, their cheering pierces my ears and I expertly avoid being crushed by the testosterone-fuelled giants while they huddle around their star quarterback.

As salty as it sounds, I feel a pang of resentment about the fact that most of them hadn't even bothered to visit Drayton while he was at home, glued to his bed, recovering from a fucking bullet wound. The few that did visit only popped in once during the first week. It seemed as though their thirst for adrenaline-packed stories and factual gossip were the only parts they were interested in.

Still, I don't want to get in the way of his reunion, so I stand by and wait until his deep green eyes find mine over the tower of tall heads. I mouth an I love you, to which he responds with a wide smile and a 'you too' and then I disappear inside the school building, ready to face what I hope is just a regular, drama-free day. They're so few and far between with Emily still doing her best to defy almost every instruction I give out during practice. However, I've got the backup and approval of almost the entire squad now. Which makes my life significantly easier.

•

"I still think we should have had a theme for prom this year." Spencer muses while we walk towards our lockers at lunch time. The halls are decorated in banners and posters with the prom dates and times on them. Prom is in three weeks at the end of April and for the first time in my entire school career, I'm excited about it. I'm in a relationship with the love of my life and we aren't in some messy in-between state. I'm already thrilled at the prospect of how handsome he's going to look in his tux.

"I'm glad prom doesn't have a theme to be honest." I sling my backpack off my shoulders and start shuffling through it for the books I'm going to ditch. "I think it's more elegant that way. Save theme for homecoming."

"True," she muses. "I am super excited about it being held at the Luton though. They booked out the entire top floor and it has like an incredible balcony and everything!"

The mention of a hotel top floor party comes with a wave of unwanted memories. I absolutely hate using the word triggered, but without a doubt, that's what Spencer's words have done to me.

Without drawing too much attention, I inhale and exhale as deeply as possible while I continue to rummage through my bag in search of nothing. It provides a good reason not to look at Spencer though. I really don't feel like having her fuss about my emotional state right now.

When I feel as though I'm not about to have a total break down in the middle of the corridor, I stand up with an armful of books and feel relieved to see that she's deeply engrossed in her cellphone screen.

The bout of nausea has mostly diminished when I pull my locker door open and a new wave of emotion passes through at what greets me.

Surprise.

Four champagne coloured balloons spring out of the confined space, floating up to the top of the ceiling and when I glance back at the locker, there's a lily taped to the inside of the door with a little envelope stuck beside it.

"What's this?" Spencer peers over my shoulder but I don't pay her any attention and instead shove the books carelessly into the locker so that my jittery hands can snatch the envelope up.

Hey beautiful.
Don't be mad. But I wasn't totally on bed rest for the last three weeks. I've been busy. If you wanna find out what's been keeping me occupied - and no doubt tell me off for being a sneak, come out to the field. I'll be waiting. Love you cheer.
Your QB ❤️

"Well that's adorable!" Spencer coos. I glance over at her excited expression but it's as if I'm seeing her through a haze. My mind is far too occupied with thoughts about what could be awaiting me. "Are you gonna go out to the field?"

"Of course," I mumble, snapping back to reality. I simultaneously snatch up my backpack from the ground and slam the locker door shut, not bothering to see if Spencer follows me or not. It's not like I'd need visual confirmation. Of course she's bouncing along behind me.

When I get out on to the field, I'm not provided any answers, but I immediately have more questions. Situated directly in front of me are ten of the team's football members. They're arranged to the left and right, forming a semi-circle and about three feet in front of them, are ten footballs, perched and ready to be kicked.

"What the hell is going on?" I murmur, more to myself than anyone else. Spencer answers anyway, stating that she's just as clueless as I am. I'm not sure that I believe her though. It wouldn't be the first time that she's kept me in the dark about something like this.

As we start to wander further on to the field, a song starts blasting from the speaker system, filling the air with the sound of 'I like me better' by Lauv.

As soon as the first verse begins, the first footballer to the left runs forward, kicking his ball straight up into the air where it explodes with a loud bang and colourful confetti begins to litter the sky, slowly descending to the ground.

The sound gives me a hell of a scare for a minute. The bang is so loud that my heart rate kicks up and I have to focus on the confetti and continue to remind myself that it's not dangerous but the entire thing is beautiful.

🎶To be young and in love in New York City.🎶

The second player follows with his ball, the same confetti-filled explosion sounding out and littering speckles of colour throughout the sky.

🎶 to not know who I am but still know that I'm good, long as you're here with me 🎶

And so it continues in quick concessions until the tenth player has kicked his ball and there is confetti everywhere. It looks beautiful as it slowly flitters down to the ground, illuminated by the blue sky and sunshine.

I'd continue to marvel at it if it weren't for the sight of my boyfriend walking out on to the field, watching me with a lopsided smirk. He saunters towards the head of the set up with a ball tucked under his arm, neither of us takes our eyes off of each other.

🎶I like me better when I'm with you. I like me better when I'm with you. 🎶

"Baby!" He cups his hand around his mouth and shouts from the middle of the field. "Catch!"

Without giving it a second thought, I drop the bag from my shoulder and raise my hands to my chest, ready for the ball to come my way. He backs up, evaluates his aim and then sends the ball with a strong arm, letting it spiral straight for me.

🎶I knew from the first time, I'd stay for a long time coz.. I like me better when I'm with you. 🎶

Much to my relief, I catch the ball flawlessly, feeling triumphant because there's now a large crowd gathered behind us, watching with anticipation. I glance down at the ball and almost drop it when I read the words that are scrawled across it in thick black font.

You're the greatest catch I've ever made, cheer. Touchdown at prom with me?

When I glance up, I find that Drayton's already reached me, his grin touches his eyes and I immediately close the distance between us, throwing myself at his body. He effortlessly retrieves my weight, burying his face in the crook of my neck while I wrap my legs around his waist.

"Of course I will," I mumble into his nape, feeling as though I'm about to crumble from the adorable overload of emotions. It hasn't evaded me that this entire scenario recreates our first official meeting. All those months ago on the first day of school when I'd almost been wiped out on this field. It would never have occurred to me that this is where it would lead us.

I'm vaguely aware of the cheering and congratulations that are booming from behind us. I'd once hated being made a spectacle, this kind of attention would have killed me. But Drayton just showed the entire school how much I mean to him, not that I'd ever doubt it, he took a bullet for me after all. But the simple gesture is heartwarming and I don't shy away from the student body. Instead I revel in how damn lucky I am to have Drayton in my life.

"I love you, Dallas."

I lean back and smash our mouths together, pulling on the back of his neck in an attempt to get impossibly close. His hands wind in my hair as he cradles me, neither of us giving a damn about who's watching. What's new though, it's always just the two of us, no one else exists when we're together.

"I love you too."

• • •
I thought some cuteness was needed after the heavy sadness of last chapter. Haha. Can we also appreciate how damn good our bae looks in this photo. Fuuuuck.

Please please tap to vote ! ❤️ much love. Until next time. x