Tags and trigger warnings: emetophilia, vomiting, poisoning, Diluc is protective of Kaeya, Hints of Kaeya/Diluc, mild Hurt/comfort

Summary: Set during Jean's story quest, in which during the surprise Thank-you party Kaeya makes a mistake that leaves him feeling miserable.

Posted to Ao3: June 26th 2021

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Today wasn't supposed to go like this for Kaeya.

Violently puking his guts up in an alleyway behind Angel's share, as Diluc held Kaeya hair and rubbed his back soft soothing words leaving the redhead's mouth as he watched Kaeya burp and retch.

No, today was supposed to go so, so, much better for Kaeya but even more for someone else, Jean.

The current Acting Grandmaster and his boss, whose party he was pretty sure he just ruined by throwing up all over the floor of Diluc's bar.

Kaeya could still remember waking up today thinking everything would be alright too.

~~~

"I was waiting for you," Kaeya sighed as the Traveler and Paimon approached the Knight's headquarters. "I have been informed about Jean falling ill. On behalf of all the Knights of Favonius, allow me to express my sincere gratitude for your assistance."

Jean and Kaeya were not just coworkers they were friends, although admittedly the relationship had grown slightly strained when Diluc had decided to leave the knights.

And considering how long Kaeya had known Jean, he also knew of her tendency to overwork herself.

Paimon froze at his words, eyes wide as she slowly blinked. "So courteous and polite. This isn't the Kaeya Paimon knows."

Kaeya merely chuckled, he could see why Paimon would say that. "Well, the circumstances warrant it. This is the Acting GrandMaster herself we're talking about," he said, before turning to the Traveler who had also been looking at him slightly wide-eyed. "Now, in addition to that thank-you message, there was one other thing."

The Traveler sighed as their gaze instantly turned weary. "Let me guess another job for us?" The last time Kaeya had had a job for them, they'd ended up going on a wild goose chase of a treasure hunt that ended with them fighting a ruin guard.

Smiling Kaeya crossed his arms as he spoke, "It's like you read my mind! We have quite a connection, don't you think?"

Paimon gave a soft hum. "Things like helping fill in for Jean?"

Kaeya nodded. "Exactly. Although the commissions you reported to Jean have already been handed off to someone else, I am concerned that they will not be handled with due care without Jean's personal touch. So, I am hoping that you can help out where you see fit." Kaeya grinned. "I will feel much more at ease knowing that the Honorary Knight is personally overseeing these cases."

Paimon's eyes narrowed. "You can flatter the Traveler all you want, but answer me this; why don't you do it?" The little fairy's tone becoming slightly accusatory.

Kaeya chuckled, shaking his head. "Oh me? I have far more important matters to attend to. There are so many...things to prepare."

It's not a lie, but he gives them the more flimsy excuse because what he was helping prepare was going to be a surprise and loose lips sank ships.

Paimon gives a small huff, her hands on her hips. "Fine then. So it's Sara, Charles, and Margaret's stuff you want us to help with, right?"

Kaeya nodded, smiling. "Those are the ones. I appreciate the help. And I'll see you later."

Once that conversation is finished Kaeya turns and makes his way back inside, to the library where he knows Lisa is waiting. Amber would be here as well but at the moment she was busy helping to gather the food they needed for the surprise.

The people aware of what the surprise was were Lisa, Amber, Diluc, Barbara, and somehow although Kaeya was unsure how specifically the bard Venti was also aware. Which left the Traveler, Paimon, and Jean, who the surprise was for, in the dark just as he needed them to be.

Convincing Diluc had been rather easy, a bit more than Kaeya thought it would be, then again he knew the redhead still had a soft spot for him despite not really knowing how to show it.

"Captain Kaeya, I got the food," Amber said cheerfully, drawing him out of his thoughts.

"That's amazing news, everything is in good condition I hope," Kaeya chuckled, turning to her.

While Amber was always eager to help, Kaeya had been a bit concerned with allowing her to cook because to put it simply. The young woman wasn't the best at it although she had been improving as of late, still, he wanted everything to be perfect and go off without a hitch.

Amber nodded with a wide grin. "Yes, the Traveler helped out."

"Good, that's good. As expected they work quickly, that just leaves Margaret and Charles's things to take care of," Kaeya said. Lisa was the one in charge of getting the delivery of drinks from Angel's share.

Still, he isn't surprised when Lisa returns with similar news as they are setting up the decorations in Diluc's bar.

There are a few of the regular patrons here along with one or two Kaeya doesn't recognize but he thinks nothing of it at the moment, too preoccupied with setting up the party to focus on much of anything else.

~~~

So when Jean walks through the door of Angel's share along with the Traveler to find the bar alive with music, decorations, and a small feast Kaeya can't help but smile especially when he catches Diluc giving him a small warm smile before quickly glancing away.

Jean is quiet for a moment, her eyes roving around the tavern, taking in the decorations. "Oh? What's all this?"

Amber grinned. "It's a thank-you party for you!" She announced cheerfully.

Jean frowns looking confused. "A...thank-you party?"

Barbara smiled. "Jean, when we heard the news about your illness, we were all so worried about you."

Amber nodded in agreement. "We can only imagine how much pressure you must be under as Acting Grand Master, and you do so much work all over Mondstadt."

"We thought that since you so rarely take any time off, we'd take this chance to throw you a party. So please enjoy yourself, Jean," Kaeya told her, his tone missing any of its usual teasing air. "After all, you'll never let us do this once you're back at work," he chuckles knowing his words to be true.

Jean blinks slowly, her eyes still wide. "Ahhh..." she begins her gaze going to the floor, a light blush on her cheeks.

And both Kaeya and Diluc smile slightly having known Jean long enough to tell when the woman was flustered.

Amber looks confused for a moment. "Jean?"

Jean shakes her head. "I...uh.."

Amber's eyes widened in awe. "Wait? Is this what Jean's like when she's...shy? I've never seen her like this before!"

Lisa chuckles, crossing her arms as Diluc gives a small snort. "It's easy to forget that outside of work, Jean is just a normal person, like anyone else."

Jean glances up with a small smile. "I...This is all just such a surprise. Thank you, everyone. This really means so much to me," Jean finally manages to say, her tone full of warmth and fondness.

Amber shakes her head with a grin. "Don't worry about it, it's nothing compared to the amount of work you do for all of us, day-in and day-out."

"But...there are so many things I still need to do," Jean said, and at her words, everyone seemed to collectively sigh.

"Fear not. We wanted to make sure you could relax and enjoy yourself. So while you were away, we all pitched in and finished off your work for you. Every last task," Kaeya reassured her, already knowing what she was worried about.

Jean frowned. "Did you really? Even the issue with the food deliveries?"

"It was no different from what we see on patrol. A couple of hilichurls. Didn't take much to get rid of them," Amber announced her hands on her hips.

Jean scowled, crossing her arms. "And the tax returns?"

Lisa sighed. "Enough, no more thinking about work today. I spend so much time doing Library admin. A few more pieces of paper to deal with was really nothing to worry about."

"Well, what about Margaret's missing cat?" Jean asked, ignoring Venti's soft sneeze at the word cat.

Paimon huffed her hands on her hips. "Are you kidding me?"

"That rascally Prince was apprehended by the brilliant Traveler. And they also reclaimed my precious astral iron strings while they were at it," Venti explained with a smile.

"Just enjoy yourself while you've got the chance Jean, no more thinking about work today," Lisa told her although it's almost a reprimand.

Jean smiled. "It is my honor to work alongside you all. Praise be for the Anemo Archon's guidance."

~~~

"Nope, I'll be taking that," Kaeya said as he plucked what he knew to be an alcoholic drink from the Traveler's hands. "How did you even get a hold of this?"

Now that Jean had finally relented and decided to enjoy herself the party was in full swing.

The Traveler huffed, reaching for the glass, practically pouting when Kaeya simply held it out of their reach. "It's mine, give it to me."

Kaeya smirked slightly. "Did you finally remember how old you are?"

At that, they sighed looking up at Kaeya with narrow eyes. "No," they grumbled glancing over at Venti who looked as equally young as them getting drunk at the bar counter.

Kaeya merely grinned, he had a feeling that would be the answer. "Exactly, if you like though there are drinks that you and Barbra can partake in right there," he told them gesturing to the nearby table filled with food in the middle of the bar.

As the Traveler made their way over to the table Kaeya sat down at a nearby empty table taking a sip of the drink he'd confiscated from the Traveler. It was sweet and fruity, the slightly tart taste of sunsettias drowning out the alcohol.

Although as Kaeya sipped on the drink he couldn't help but wonder how the Traveler had gotten their hands on it in the first place. Diluc and Charles were working the bar tonight and both of them knew that the Traveler was unaware of their own age.

So they wouldn't have given it to them. In Kaeya's mind, the most likely suspect was Venti considering Kaeya fully understood just how much the bard liked to cause trouble. And it wouldn't have been the first time he'd attempted to let them get drunk.

Making a mental note to deal with him later Kaeya downed the rest of the drink before grabbing some food and more alcohol.

~~~

Kaeya felt strange, well strange was putting it lightly. He was dizzy and nauseous, a haze blanketing his thoughts that left him feeling slightly sleepy.

He winced slightly when his stomach gave a soft growl that went unheard over the music and chatter of Jean's party still in full swing. His stomach sloshing sickeningly inside of him the food and drinks he'd stuffed down practically rolling against the walls of his stomach.

Yawning, Kaeya forced back a muffled hiccup wondering why he felt like this. He'd been drinking yes, but it'd been nowhere near his usual amount at least not yet, although with the way his stomach was swirling he didn't think he wanted to even look at another drink right now.

In fact, just the rich scent of food filling the tavern was making his nausea worse and he gave a soft sigh, putting his head in his hands as bile burned at the back of his throat and his stomach hitched slightly.

A splash of sour, bitter bile filling his mouth that had him quickly, almost frantically swallowing, a small shudder of disgust rolling over him. If he thought he could stomach it right now, he'd take a bite of the food still left on his plate to try and get the disgusting aftertaste out of his mouth.

Maybe Kaeya had caught something which wouldn't be surprising considering his job, not to mention the fact that Klee was at that age where she, like most children, put their hands on everything with no regard for cleanliness.

But that didn't make sense either considering he'd felt just fine until now.

Kaeya closes his eye and tries his best to take deep breaths in but every time he does his stomach practically convulses, and bile bubbles at the back of his throat. He's pretty sure if it wasn't for the fact he were sitting at one of the tables in Angel's share with his back to the main area, where the party was taking place then maybe someone else may have noticed his current predicament.

Still wondering why he ended up feeling so sick, so quickly Kaeya is so distracted that when his stomach suddenly flips inside of him bring up a soft burp he doesn't bother trying to stop it, until he realizes that it brought more than just air with it.

A small trickle of sludge-like sticky bile splashes onto his still half-full plate and the table. Kaeya's eye widens as he swallows rapidly trying to force back the contents of his stomach threatening to fill his mouth as his belly sloshes and convulses again sending more up more of its contents.

Squeezing his mouth shut Kaeya reaches out, fingers fumbling slight as he quickly grabs the nearby glass he'd had one of his drinks in and brings it to his mouth. His cheeks puff out as he opens his mouth allowing his regurgitated lunch and dinner to fall from his mouth.

It's a thick half watery, lumpy slurry that splashes into the glass, splattering his hand as it fills the glass almost instantly.

He coughs doing his best to swallow back the next wave of vomit, trying to gurgle up his throat.

But today is just not Kaeya's day as he burps, practically choking as a larger wave of vomit sprays the table. The sick slurry in the cup sloshes when he lurches forward, coating his hands and gloves in warm, liquid and mushy sludge.

The noise catches Paimon's attention. "Kaeya?" she asked gliding over to him, her small hands still holding her plate of food.

But Kaeya does answer her and Paimon frowns when she sees his shoulder shake and hears a strange gurgling noise coming from him. Almost like he's choking on some type of liquid.

When Paimon sees what the problem is though she shrieks, causing the others to look over at her and Kaeya.

But Kaeya is too busy retching up another wave of vomit to deal with her or anyone right now.

Although he is pretty sure he hears Lisa say, "Oh Kaeya, sweetie."

Quickly leaving the counter Diluc approaches Kaeya, laying a comforting hand on his shoulder. He can feel Kaeya's shoulder shake with a barely repressed heave as he clamps his hand over his mouth, trying to stop himself from throwing up again.

"I'll take him outside, he probably isn't feeling well, " Diluc said as he pulled Kaeya to his feet. "Watch the bar for me, Charles."

Charles nodded a slight look of surprise on his face. "Yes sir."

Diluc here's another muffled retch and the sound of something splattering on the floor but doesn't stop as he pulls Kaeya to the back exit to the tavern.

What does make Diluc stop is when he hears a barely suppressed snicker as Kaeya throws up again, vomit leaking through the cracks in his fingers and onto the tavern floor.

Diluc's eyes zero in on some Snezhnaya merchants sitting at one of the tables towards the back of the bar. Sneers on their faces as they don't even bother holding back their laughter as they watch Kaeya struggle and fail to keep from throwing up.

"Fucking animals in the knights, every last one of them. Worse than pigs, stinking up the tavern, " one of the merchants says, nudging the one sitting beside him with a grin.

Diluc grits his teeth barely restraining himself as his grip on Kaeya tightens slightly.

He turns back to Charles for a moment. "One more thing, throw those assholes out for me." It's not a request, but more of an order, and Diluc doesn't wait for Charles to answer before he continues leading Kaeya out of the bar.

Once outside, and with his face practically burning with shame Kaeya says nothing as he allows his vomit-coated hand to drop from his mouth, a loud strangled retch leaving him as a semi watery wave of vomit cascades onto the stone alleyway.

Diluc cringes as he reaches out, gathering Kaeya's hair back in one hand and laying a hand on his back with the other. "How much did you drink, " Diluc asked softly, it wouldn't be the first time Kaeya's overdid it a bit on the alcohol.

Kaeya shakes his head though, panting as he swallows. "Not enough-" he manages to force out as he's cut off by a loud wet burp that sends another wave of vomit splattering onto the ground.

Diluc bites his lip merely watching Kaeya for a moment. "Are you sick?" He asked once he thinks Kaeya can actually answer him.

"No, just came on suddenly, " he rasps, shaking his head, his voice completely shot by this point.

Diluc gives a sigh of frustration not really knowing what else to ask, now that the obvious culprits were out of the way.

All he can do is rub Kaeya's back trying his best to soothe him as he burps and retches up another wave.

That's when he thinks of something else.

"You didn't eat any strange food did you?" Diluc asked, the gears in his head-turning. He'd thought that those merchants were just making fun of Kaeya because they could and he was with the knights but it might've been something more than that.

Kaeya, much like Diluc was rather notorious for making things in Mondstadt difficult for the visiting Fatui diplomats; it wasn't too far-fetched that they would pull something malicious. But Kaeya tended to be a careful person, that was hard to catch off guard.

Kaeya shakes his head again panting, but then stops a look of realization on his face. "The Traveler had a drink. Alcohol, I thought the Bard gave it to them...so I took it, " Kaeya mumbles taking in as much air as he can.

He still feels miserable, so he doesn't bother wiping the threads of drool from his mouth considering he's just going to be throwing up soon again anyway.

Diluc nods as he guides Kaeya to sit down in one of the nearby wooden chairs that sat at a few of the tables behind the bar. "Wait here, I'll be right back okay, " he told Kaeya, but the other man merely gave a weak groan still retching over the ground.

When Diluc returns Kaeya is in the middle of throwing up again, although he's only bringing up bile and saliva at the moment.

"I asked them but the Traveler said that they didn't get it from Venti, or anyone in our group for that matter. They said one of the merchants gave it to them as thanks for helping them out, " Diluc huffed as he held back Kaeya's hair.

This also meant that Kaeya wasn't the intended target for this unfortunate incident, the Traveler was.

"Barbra went to the Cathedral to get her catalyst, once she gets back she'll heal you, and things'll be alright, okay?" Diluc tries to reassure him.

But Kaeya just groans as he retches again, his throat practically raw as he adds to the small puddle of watery vomit at his feet. He just wants this entire ordeal to be over so he can stop feeling so miserable.