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six

.06 | Moment of Peace

[ Figured I'd bring Ansem on board as this chapter's gif. I love him and his friendship with Merida! ]

Merida would be lying if she said she wasn't thinking about the mystery man the rest of the weekend. The circus had continued on for a couple more night's as it always did, but Merida felt stuck in place somehow; a mix between standing still and looking back as sleep would elude her and her mind would think back to the kindness of the stranger.

The only silver lining about what was to come of this weekend would be that she would get to visit her mother's grave once the deal was made and the show was over.

There was one thing Killian was good at and that was keeping his promises, whether they were in your benefit or not he held true to everything he had ever said to her. She had no doubt that Killian would make good on his promise to also have her in the physical way he so craved. This thought brought a dread to her belly that refused to leave.

Due to the fact that Merida had so much on her mind, Isabella noticed the more aloof nature to Merida that weekend.

Isabella had come in before the finale night of the circus. She waved a hand in front of Merida's face as she had been talking for a few minutes now, but Merida's mind had been elsewhere. Truth be told Merida hadn't heard a word the pink haired girl had said.

Isabella flashed a toothy grin as her bubblegum pink hair bounced around tonight in more natural waves.

"C'mon on tiger-girl. Snap to it! Bring your head back down to reality." She giggled manically as she placed a white gloved hand before her lips as if to try and stifle her laughter. She was decked out in a white and gold accented suit with a trail of feathers behind her. They were fanned out and upwards like a peacock's feathers, except hers were white as a pristine wedding dress.

Merida made a mental note to pay more attention when other members of the circus were around. She didn't need Killian thinking something was off about her because that would lead to an interrogation and the less interaction she had with Killian the better.

Fran had even eyed her curiously a few times when she would catch Merida staring up at the darkened sky at night, wrapped in merely a tiny cotton blanket that wasn't big enough to cover her malnourished body.

Fran knew Merida well enough that she could sense when her aura shifted. What was usually stormy grey and blue shifted to a whimsical yellow and orange that Fran very rarely glimpsed on Merida.

These were new colors. Brighter colors.

Fran was old enough to know that the reasons her aura had glimmers of color were due large in part by the man she had seen Merida talking to a couple night's ago. She had been young once too, and the look on Merida's face was very reminiscent of someone that was thinking about a boy.

And God's knew Merida was not thinking about Killian in that way.

That weekend the circus attracted a huge crowd throughout its run. Merida had overheard the twins saying they were making double what the expected pay out was supposed to be this weekend. Chicago was a bustling place, so it was a no brainer that this weekend would prove to be monetarily prosperous for Killian.

He was never satisfied though.

He wanted all the riches. He wanted that and more, including the Magician's Treasures.

Unknown to Merida, Killian had been present for some of the time that she had been talking to the strange man.

Be it his obsession with keeping her as his pet, or his jealousy at the fact that she was smiling with another man besides himself, no one could really know for certain what drove Killian to do the things he did but the rest of the weekend he made sure to have eyes on Merida everywhere she went, and he was uncharacteristically silent around her.

Merida had noticed the shift in Killian this weekend, but she assumed it was because after tonight's show they were going to be meeting with Diego, the fellow Killian had spoken highly of before the circus began this weekend.

From what she had gathered, Diego ran the mythical Underground Railroad, which was a very intricate illegal system that would smuggle in illegal gangsters from Mexico and other Latin countries into the United States.

Diego was an enigma though.

Only a handful had ever glimpsed Diego and even fewer knew what he actually looked like. Some people said Diego was just a name, much like James Bond, and as leadership changed hands the name of the person running the Underground Railroad always remained Diego as homage to the original leader.

Merida didn't know what to believe, but she liked to think that Diego was actually maybe even a woman. How foolish everyone would feel if it turned out to be a woman running the show.

Whatever the case, Diego showing his face to Killian was a pretty big deal, and the murmurs around the circus all added to the stirrings of anxiety.

Diego was coming late tonight after the show was over and the grounds were shut down to make a deal with Killian on a shipment of guns. Merida had assumed it was why Killian had been distant most of the weekend.

She hadn't a clue that he had seen her little chat with the mystery man, and she had no reason to be on edge from his lack of attention to her.

If anything, it was a breath of fresh air.

That moment of fresh air was cut short as Killian walked into her room the night after their last performance.

He was clad in his typical Ringermaster outfit. The black pants bloomed out at the bottom but tapered around his ankle and disappeared under the large black boots.

His red, gold and black coat ran the length of his body, the tail of it flipping up at the end in a very severe way that his tailor had custom made for him. His white shirt underneath was rumpled but still buttoned to the top, and the black top hot lay lazily upon his bright sunrise orange hair.

His eyes tightened at the sight of Merida as she had been caught mid stride of slipping out of her bronze colored flapper styled dress. She froze. Even though she wore a nude colored silk chemise underneath, she still felt exposed and more naked than ever.

The chill in the room from the outside temperatures didn't help her case any, and his eyes dipped to her supple bosoms and then back up to her timid face. She swore his eyes flashed and the once steadily breathing Killian was now panting with an aroused state.

Her first instinct was to freeze, and her second was to grab the dress that was in a heap on the floor beneath her bare feet. She jerked it up instantly, pulling it against her body like a blanket, but it was too late.

Killian had seen her as prey and the harrowed look in his eyes was all she had to see to realize that the moment he had his way with her might just be now.

Her eyes were panic-stricken, and she felt a momentary flash of vertigo sweep its way through her body, but Killian was already before her by the time she opened her eyes to shake off the feeling.

"Let go of the dress, Merida." His voice was an all imposing threat.

She swallowed thickly and felt her body tremor as she obeyed within a fraction of a second of his command. She willed her body to stop trembling. It gave him too much of a power trip to see her squirm, and right now she didn't want to give him that.

The dress fell to a heap before her bare feet and Killian stood as close to her as he could without actually touching his chest to her own. He was a centimeter away from her, and she could smell coffee and licorice upon his breath.

He leaned into her as his right hand swiftly removed his top hat, pulling it behind his back as if the gesture was somehow gentlemanly. However, there was nothing suave and charming about Killian. Not when she knew the monster he truly was.

"That's better." He murmured possessively as his free left hand ran the length of her neck down to her collar bone and then down the side of her right arm. She stood resolute like an oak tree, not moving nor trembling.

"Now, you remember our deal don't ya' doll face?"

She nodded mechanically, her eyes looking down to the dress around her feet. He rolled his eyes and tsked aloud as if her silent answer annoyed him.

"Need I remind you to look at me when you answer?"

Merida looked up at Killian with flat eyes. They were void of emotion. To any stranger, Merida's eyes would appear dead as a cadaver.

"I'm sorry, Killian." She whispered emotionless through chapped lips as Killian's smile rose upon his face. The smile was all wrong though. It was a tainted smile full of death, decay and chaos.

"That's better." He murmured as if inspecting her face with mock concern.

He lifted his left hand and smoothed out her hair in a petting motion, but the gesture was anything but comforting. Merida remained still as stone beneath his calculated movements.

"Diego will be here shortly after midnight. It'll be business as usual. Just sit there, shut your cat trap and keep an ear out. Then we can celebrate another deal together."

She swore he leaned in to smell her hair as his eyes closed in euphoria. He offered a small smirk as he pulled away to open his eyes and reveal pits of evil in those dark irises.

"Then I suppose you can go see mommy dearest in the morning before we leave." He added as if it was the last thing on his mind right now. He made a face as if seeing her mother's grave meant very little to him.

What was yet to come with Killian after the deal made Merida want to run away and hide, but she knew there was no use in running. Killian always found her, and he always made sure she regretted running away the moment he brought her back.

"I do apologize in advanced, Merida."

She furrowed her brow at this statement, the confusion written on her face as Killian leered down at her supple bosoms. He closed the gap between them, pressing himself against her as his mouth grazed her left ear in a very inappropriate way.

As started to speak, a cold icy dread filled her veins from head to toe.

"I have no intentions of being gentle,"

There was a soft snicker on his part that reverberated through her tainted ears.

"You see, I'm not exactly a romantic kind of guy." He cackled now, pulling his head away and leaning it back as if it were the funniest statement.

He cleared his throat and watched as Merida looked at him wide eyed. Her eyes gave away her feelings of fright even though her body didn't tremble.

He grinned deviously.

He took a step back from Merida, eyeing her body once more for good measure before sauntering out of her dressing quarters, but not before stopping near the exit.

"Oh, and one more thing."

He turned quickly on his boot and glared at her sharply, "The next time I see you canoodling with a guest I'll make sure you won't be able to sit for a week."

He knew about the mystery man

"I'll have Francesca fetch you when Diego is here."

His face changed like whiplash, morphing from a sharp glare to a maddening smirk.

Being over dramatic as he were, he bowed, holding his hat in his right hand before flipping it back on his head and waving his left fingers in a childish wave.

"Toodles."

The moment he disappeared Merida's stomach turned, and she ran to her wastebasket, barely making it in time as she dispelled the little content she had in her stomach. Her body began to tremble from the proceeding dry heaves as Merida murmured over and over again,

"I won't let him see me cry. I won't let him see me cry..."

Whatever happened after the deal with Diego, Merida made a promise to herself that she wouldn't let Killian see her cry.

She would take what she had coming to her and she would stifle her tears. No matter how much he broke her body and soul tonight, she wouldn't give him satisfaction of seeing her cry.

----

Merida currently sat on the ground in her quarters in the back of the big tent. She leaned against her large vanity with her legs out in front of her.

Her right hand currently stroking the course mane of Ansem as his head relaxed on her thighs. His head was giant as it covered most of the skin on her thighs. He was none the wiser of his size and stature, and it made her smile faintly as this display of affection was similar to that of a house cat.

Except Ansem was no house cat.

He was the King of the Jungle.

His eyes were closed, but his ears twitched every once in awhile which indicated he was not asleep. She faintly closed her own eyes, and her breathing was steady for a change.

However, that was souly because Ansem's presence soothed her.

Her right hand continued to stroke the mane upon his head. Every once in awhile she could feel the rumble of his purr from his throat along her thigh, and as it got louder, she could hear it in the stark silence of the tent.

After Killian left, she had quickly changed into ratty old shorts and a baggy gray shirt that covered her thin frame. The dress was left draped over her vanity chair, and her silk chemise had been used to wipe her mouth after she had gotten sick in her trash bin. The chemise would be ruined without a good wash, but that was the last thing on her mind.

Ansem's front legs were draped over her and she so happened to glance down at his powerful paws as they contracted and pulled back in. The black claws were dirty from the show, but it only made them look more deadly. Despite the power behind the big cat, he was content as ever.

Ansem found Merida's presence equally as soothing as she found his.

An hour after Killian had left her, she sought out Ansem in his cage, and with discretion she brought Ansem to hang out with her. It wasn't that she it was forbidden, but the last night when things were starting to get wrapped up was when Killian wanted all the animals accounted for.

Sooner than later they would be doing a head count and she'd make sure that Ansem was back before then. For now, she relaxed in the silence of her momentary peaceful oblivion.

They had been this way for awhile as the circus slowly shut down. Certain areas were being powered down, the games and subsequent ride lights were disappearing, and the magical ambiance she loved so much from the circus was starting to fade.

It was the way of the circus though.

It would come and leave just as quickly as it had bloomed. There was a magic behind it all that her mother had loved as well.

"I'll get to see my mom soon, Ansem."

He opened his eyes and tilted his head to her as if he understood what she was saying. Part of her always wondered if he could. His large tongue stretched out as he yawned, stretching his muscular legs and flexing his claws as he stretched all in one fluid motion of laziness.

His head returned to her thighs and she swore he nuzzled her more as a sign of understanding. She was curious if Ansem ever remembered his own mother, but she pushed that thought away because it made her sad. Merida had assumed the role of nurturer to Ansem, a bond that had never been shaken despite all the horrors that occurred around here.

Ansem lifted his head up moments before Fran walked in, her solemn gaze saying more than words could. Merida knew it was time and that Killian was beckoning for her to come make her entrance.

Diego must be here.

Fran wore a see-through black shawl that was littered with silver stars over a flowing off-white maxi dress that came to her ankles. Her black flats glittered in the soft light that glowed in her room.

"He wants you now, Merida."

Merida nodded silently before maneuvering out from under Ansem. He made a grumpy noise of disapproval before getting up and then sitting on his haunches as his amber glowing eyes watched Merida carefully.

"Will you make sure Ansem gets put up?"

Fran nodded, but she took a few steps towards Merida and hesitantly reached out with her thin-skinned hands to rub Merida's shoulders. She looked at her with a forlorn gaze that was mixed with something motherly.

"I always hate these nights." Fran murmured.

Merida knew why.

She was put in danger by being the center of attention during a high-profile deal. Merida looked down at her feet and then back up at Fran with unphased eyes.

"What can we do?" She offered as helpless eyes stared at Francesca.

Merida added lowly, "He saw me with that man."

Francesa sucked in a sharp breath as her eyes glossed over her face with genuine concern. No doubt checking for bruises.

"I'm okay." Merida added for Fran's benefit.

"I didn't want him to see you with that man. I should've come to you sooner-I-"

"It's okay, Fran. Really. I just got the typical threat. It was I who should never have had engaged with him. No matter how nice he may have seemed."

Francesca pursed her lips and nodded the way she had come in, "Don't keep Killian waiting, honey,"

She paused and hesitated before giving her a warning look, "Don't be alarmed when you walk out and see men everywhere. It would seem that Killian spent a pretty penny of our earnings on hired goons to keep watch."

There was a small scowl on her face as if she too disapproved with Killian's dealings.

Merida frowned as well. She knew he used all the earnings for selfish reasons, but the animals and circus members should have been top priority when it came to being compensated. Be it with food or clothes, they all deserved their cut first.

But they all knew by now that Killian didn't operate that way.

"Thanks for the heads up." Merida added lowly. She turned towards Ansem as he looked between the exchange, his ear twitching lightly while concern grew on his feline features.

"I'll be fine, Ansem."

She closed the gap between them and used her left and right hand to hold the sides of his face, bringing her lips down to lightly kiss the fur atop his head. He headbutted her gently and she could hear a purr begin to build again.

Fran smiled fondly as Merida reluctantly pulled away from Ansem. Merida's harrowed eyes turned a deviant shade of their normal color before her body contorted quickly and violently into the mutant-sized tiger.

In her mutated form, Merida was mostly in control, but she had an itchy temper. Merida would at times wrestle with the beast within her, and sometimes she didn't know if she had tamed the beast, or the beast had tamed her.

With one last look at Fran and Ansem, Merida padded out of her quarters, large paws connecting with the Earth as the big black sky came into view. Her eyes immediately caught sight of all the hired men standing around the circus campground.

They were peppered everywhere, but their guns were hidden. Once she padded out of the tent their body language stiffened. But no one drew their weapon upon her. They all knew not to shoot Killian's prized pet.

Merida walked silently across the green expanse of grass, the circus almost completely shut down now. Soon it would be as if they were never there. She paused before the tent flap that was home to Killian's private quarters.

Her ears twitched as a scent from down wind caught in her nose. She tilted her large head towards the direction the wind blew and wriggled her feline nose.

That smell...

Voices from the tent reclaimed her attention.

Pushing past the unease of the scent that caught her nose, Merida furrowed her eyes into a more intimidating gaze and walked into the tent where Killian and the infamous Diego awaited.

Author's Note:

Thank you shaarlocked for this sign off graphic! It's BEAUTIFUL!

Sooo excited for the next chapter and we will TOTALLY get an action pack showdown. Just you wait!


I freaking love me some Ansem and Merida bonding time. They are such great friends and I love that even though she is in a terrible situation she has Ansem AND Fran to lean on.

Btw, Killian makes me so angry. I feel terrible for our bean Merida. Dx
I'm literally writing his character and cringing because I can't even fathom what Merida feels. I mean, I can since I'm writing her character but being in her shoes in resl life would be awful.

Steve needs to hurry up and save this poor girl!!

Sorry for the major delay in this chchapter but life got hectic. I'm following up with an immediate update SOON! I already started working on the next one!

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