I have been participating in fandom for a very long time. If I consider One Direction as the first fandom I was actively a part of, then I've been around it for about a decade. I spent some of my most impressionable years being involved with all aspects of fandom— the good and the bad. It's easy to say that I've noticed a glaringly obvious trend surrounding male characters/people. And I think it's about time I've talked about it.

When it comes to male characters, the audience tends to reach an ultimate high of craze about them. Most of the focus will go to the men, even in a female-driven piece of media. This isn't inherently bad by itself, but it does lead to some behaviors that can be worrisome.

I have a few things I want to discuss in this rant, so I'll try to section it off and talk about each thing individually.

THE MALE CHARACTER AS AN ANTAGONIST

Now I know most of us like a good villain, including myself. It's interesting to see the darker side of whatever thing you're consuming and it's fun to have someone to hate and root against. However, I've noticed most times when a villain is a man (mostly a man who's considered attractive) suddenly they're a lot more likable versus a female villain.

Most of you know that I used to be in the Maze Runner fandom. I cannot tell you how many comments I've gotten over the years of people who despise Teresa, root for her death, call her a bitch, ask her to be written out of the story, etc. But I can guarantee that, had she been a guy, she would have been treated very differently by the fandom. She may have even been a fan favorite. This is even more obvious in the books because both Teresa and Aris (a male character for those of you who aren't into TMR) participated in a "betrayal" and yet, the main character, Thomas, forgave Aris but never gave Teresa a chance to explain herself for like... no reason.

Normally, a male antagonist would have to be even semi-attractive to be liked. An example is Gollum/Smeagol from Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit. Nobody is simping over a creature who looks like this

But imagine a hot dude who lived in the depths of a cave and was obsessed with a ring??? People may have even rooted for him. But since he looks like... that... you probably won't hear anyone saying "Yeah, my favorite character is Gollum😌"

THE ROMANTICIZATION OF MALE ANTAGONISTS

When you have a character who is attractive and male, most of the time, their horrible actions are romanticized/excused, and this is where the problem arises. The majority of the time, the fandom creates an idea of this character or person in their heads that is different from who they actually are or what they actually do.

A very good example of this is Draco Malfoy from Harry Potter. Personally, I do like Draco, but I can't deny that he was a pompous, pretentious, narcissistic, closed-minded asshole. We can come up with theories and headcanons all we want, but the truth is that he did call Hermione a mudblood in almost every single book, bullied people due to their blood status/economic status/looks/interests, believed in blood supremacy, and did more horrible things. Not to mention that he seemed proud that his father was a Death Eater (even when he was in Azkaban for it) and became one himself.

Draco had a lot of potential for his character to represent rejecting the toxic, hateful values one is taught during childhood, but he simply did not achieve that. You can create headcanons all you want, but it doesn't mean that they happened in the actual media.

The versions of these characters that exist in people's minds tend to be very different from how they act in the original source.

Also, because these characters are typically male and attractive, it opens doors for their behaviors to be romanticized, which is very dangerous. Some young girls can see other people who are older than them (or the same age as them) seeing these terrible characters as models for how people should act or treat them in real life. This is more of a common phenomenon with girls who like men so I'm using those terms here.

THE BULLY

This is a VERY potent trend across fandoms. People tend to ship a female character with someone who bullies them or is routinely HORRIBLE to them, and not in an enemies-to-lovers kind of way (but even if you marry a person who bullied you horribly, that's kinda weird imo).

Some examples are Snily, Dramione, Billy Hargrove x a female OC, those fanfics called "Bullied by Harry Styles", and more.

I'll use Snily as an example from my own life. I didn't really ship it, but I was 11-12 when I first read the Harry Potter books all the way through, and I loved Snape after the last book. I felt so sorry for him and how he couldn't get with Lily. Then I got older and realized that he was a piece of shit who called her a Mudblood multiple times, was horrible to her friends, and never accepted that she didn't love him in the way he wanted.

There was never anything romantic between Draco and Hermione in the original text or films. Now I'm all for crackships, but Draco again, routinely called her a blood supremacist term, made fun of her appearance, and treated her horribly. It goes deeper than teasing her because he had a crush. It's blood supremacy and quite horrifying.

These fanfics and sub-fandoms often frighten me because, as a victim of bullying myself, the thought of people romanticizing these actions and making them seem desirable to have in real life is downright terrifying. It is not normal for a guy to constantly belittle and insult you and then give you the excuse that he likes you. I'll touch more on this in another section.

THE MAN IN POWER/THE OLDER MAN

Too often I see people who ship a man in a position of power (most of the time, a MUCH older man in a position of power) with a female character who's deemed "lesser" than him, whether because of their position, age, or some other thing. The position of power thing doesn't automatically mean it's bad if it's done right, like a king falling for a peasant girl, but it becomes a problem if the man in power abuses it to manipulate, abuse, trick, and do other bad things to the girl.

Example that's common right now due to Shadow and Bone's Netflix premiere: Alina and the Darkling. Alina is 17 years old and the Darkling is at least 500. He manipulates her constantly, threatens her, kills her loved ones, forces her to do things she desperately doesn't want to for his own PERSONAL gain, uses her as a tool, and that's only scratching the surface. Yet people are like "ugh but the way he looks at her😍😍😍"

PLEASE touch some grass. I am begging you. Lie in a field and just touch some grass.

Another example is Snape and Hermione. I have no idea why this ship exists but it makes me want to die. Snape is like 20 years older than her, also treats her like shit, and is her TEACHER. BYE???? SHE'S A LITERAL KID THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE SERIES.

People tend to ship an older man with a literal child and it disgusts me. Grown-ass men should not be romantically involved with MINORS. It doesn't matter if the girl is 18, if there's a huge age gap like the man is 45, it's *technically* legal but still concerning. Turning 18 doesn't magically make you fully mature. Your brain isn't even fully developed until 25. A 45-year-old man has MUCH more general life experience than an 18-year-old girl. She is young enough to be his daughter. My dad was 46 when I turned 18. The fuck.

Most of the time, when an older man wants a "younger woman," it's because he wants someone to control. An 18-21-year-old is much more impressionable than a woman their own age. They are more likely to fall for gaslighting and manipulation because they may not know what is deemed "normal" for a relationship. (This can happen regardless of age of course, but I'm just saying it's more likely to happen this way. Don't come for me.)

THE DUDE'S JUST HOT

Ok I might get hate for this but I truly cannot understand the appeal of Tom Riddle.

Tom Riddle and Voldemort are not two separate entities. They're the same person. You are making Voldemort fanfiction. The dude was like 11 and said his mother must have been weak because she died giving birth. He terrorized kids in his orphanage for fun. He never genuinely cared about his friends, merely seeing them as followers and tools to further his mission of purifying wizard blood (despite being a half-blood himself???). He murdered innocent people to extend his own life and murdered countless others just because. He was a wizard N*zi. But because he was hot as a teenage apparition in The Chamber of Secrets, suddenly all of that is okay????

This is also where that "the fandom's idea of a person is very different from how they are in canon" thing comes in. You can act like Voldemort was this tortured soul who only needed someone to love him to fix him, but that's simply not the truth. Some of his followers, like Bellatrix, loved him and he didn't change. A pretty woman isn't going to suddenly make him not want to ruthlessly murder all of the half-bloods, Muggle-borns, Muggles, and anyone who stands in his way.

There are some cases where the character just happens to be hot and that's the sole reason why people go crazy for them. If 17-year-old Voldemort hadn't been played by an attractive dude, do you think people would love him the same way?? Would there be as many fanfics for him?? I truly don't think so.

WHY DOES THIS MATTER?

"It's all fiction anyway, it doesn't matter in real life."

Wrong.

Why do I care so much? Why does this bother me as much as it does?

As previously stated, the majority of people with thoughts like these are younger, impressionable girls. They'll see boys/men treating female characters horribly and have it be depicted as love, or see other people shipping them, or see people excusing their evil deeds because they're hot, and they might have a tendency to do so in real life. Girls could look at a relationship between a girl and her bully and view their own experience with rose-colored glasses— that is, they romanticize their own experience with bullying/abuse and think "but it's because he loves me/he could secretly be in love with me/etc."

Treating these situations as ideal or romantic is incredibly dangerous. It can make it harder for girls to see red flags in their own relationships. If you're teaching them that if a guy is awful to her, it's because he likes her, they'll probably be more likely to tolerate men treating them the same way.

It also is noticeable to men. They see people shipping Harley Quinn and the Joker and strive to be like the Joker in real life (you may think I'm exaggerating but there are men out there who strive to be like the Joker and I WISH I were joking). They see girls romanticizing these terrible male characters and feel like they have an excuse to treat them the same way. "Oh but she likes it" does she????? Hmmm I don't think so.

This has the potential to teach girls that a guy can treat her like dirt because he claims to love her or because he's attractive. I've heard so many stories of girls receiving awful treatment from their crushes but going along with it because at least they're getting attention from him, and it breaks my heart every single time.

Please be careful with what you say/project into fandom because, I promise you, young people are listening. They're learning. They are less mature than you and are less capable of separating fiction from real life. And it may be too late once they finally learn better.