I have an obsession with A:tLAxBNHA

Azula has perished, cold and tired and weak. It was pathetic, really. She couldn't have hated herself more for it. At least the mirror isn't talking, but maybe it's worse, now Mom is standing before her. Maybe it's been weeks or months or years, but it's so dark here; but it's never quiet, why won't it be quiet. Shut up!

Then, there is light. It's bright, and warm and fuzzy. Azula wants the sun. She craves Agni on her flesh. To burn is to destroy, to burn is to live. But, she will not bring destruction again. She will be loved, not feared. Because Mai loved Zuko more than she feared Azula. She will burn brighter than ever before.

There is fire on her fingertips.

A woman she does not know is holding her. This woman is blank faced, eyes hard and cold and the color of molten gold. Her hair is melting, melting, melting like lava from the mouth of a volcano.

Her eyes are so cold, Azula thinks. It's like Father.

"Take him."

"Yes, dear."

Then a man looks at him, shiny blue eyes. Waterbender eyes. Has she been reincarnated? To the child of a waterbender and a firebender? She growls, but it comes out as a whine. It is not her legacy to become a peasant.

"Pathetic,"

"Oh come now, dear, what's his name?"

"You pick it, since you care so much." The woman glares out. A hiss spills from between her lips.

"Okay.. little Enji. Welcome to the world."

_

Azula came to realize, after a month, that this was not her world. She hated it, she missed everything, everything. Her brother would be a Fire Lord, she supposes. She was supposed to be Fire Lord. Her. Father said it himself, then again, Father would be king. She would be the same. One step below him, the little princess. She hated it. She hated everything.

She misses Zuko, but she ignores the feeling, it becomes lost and foreign to her. Love was never a thing she thought about; but her behavior around Father proves her wrong.

She can do far too little for her mind to compensate. It's a terrible feeling, being weak. Then, Zuzu was weak before he beat her with that Waterbender peasant. As soon as she could write, she would document it all. Everything that was Azula.

Everything.

"Come on, Enji, don't you want to play?" This boy, Enji, his father is so much different from hers. He loves her and love triumphs over fear, Azula.

"No!" She screams. "Don't play! No play!"

His eyes widen, beautiful blue. More so than any waterbending peasant she'd ever met. They sparkle with joy, pride. Father never looked at her like that, her new Mom never looks at her like that. She wants to hug him, to cry and say that he shouldn't leave her.

She misses Zuzu. It hasn't occurred to her in years, but she really does. It's not because she misses the fighting, her being better. She misses having a brother. She misses Zuzu.

Mother stands in the doorway, a smirk twisting on her lips.

"What did you say, honey?" There's something evil in her eyes that looks far too much like Ozai. It's dark and looming.

"I don't wanna play! It's stupid- stupid!"

Azula ignores it. Mother chuckles, it's also like Ozai. She's trying to see the difference between them.

Oh Agni, it's restarting, isn't it?

_

It's her fifth birthday today, and there is fire on her fingertips, she can feel it. She doesn't blow out the candles, but she reaches for the flame, Mother stops Dad from stopping her.

There is fire on her fingertips.

It sparks all around her and she laughs. Mother laughs too, that's when Azula stops. She will not be a toy again. She will not fall for others using her. Not like Father did. She smiles at Mother, but it's more like a sneer. She turns to Dad and laughs with him. He grabs her pudgy fingers and they dance, he orders the fire to calm.

There is fire on her fingertips, and it is life. She doesn't want to destroy, but to save people. She destroyed everything before, and now she wants to help them. To save the. Because fire is also life.

There is fire on her fingertips, and Mother is allowing her to burn.

_

Sometimes, she goes through the books she's kept hidden from Dad and Mother. She looks over everything, all that has happened in her past life. All that was Azula, daughter of Fire Lord Ozai, named after Fire Lord Azulon. She thinks it was chaos, and she holds in her anger. Anger never did her any good, listening to Father never did her any good.

The lightning doesn't listen to her, she finds inraging. It is hers to control. It's hers.

She holds in her temper, she recalls what has happened when she doesn't. There is fire on her fingertips. Zuko stands before her, his scar is seered across his face and he's asking her why? Why she's doing this. And Azula doesn't know. So she says she's sorry, that she'll be different, that she'll save everyone. That she won't make them fear her, that she will be good.

There is fire on her fingertips. It's pathetic, really.

But there is a storm today, and it is best to try and get it naturally. She steps outside, stout legs listening to her order. Control, she needs to control herself. To control the fire on her fingertips.

Agni is hiding, behind clouds and rain and gloom; but Azula can feel his powers. Warmth and sun. Fire is life as it is destruction, and it is all around her. There is fire on her fingertips.

She points her fingers up, up, up to the sky, calling forth the power if lightning. Someone is watching her, Mother is watching her. Dad would have stopped her long ago. Uncle's words ring in her head, to find peace in others, you must first find peace in yourself. Maybe that kook was right. Maybe. In, hold, out. Fire is in her breathe as it his her hands.

Suddenly, she can feel the energy in her. Lighting, thunder, fire. She breathes out; calm. She has to stay calm. There is fire on her fingertips, one wrong move could kill her and everyone around.

Then there is light. It's burning white, stronger than flames. Hot, it courses through her body, she can feel the freedom. Ignoring the stare, she bows to Agni.

Mother is clapping, slowly, behind her.

"Good job, Enji. Maybe you can do what I want you to."

Azula looks at her with pointed eyes. She wants to scream, she isn't Enji. I am Azula! But she doesn't, she knows how to play the part. Pretty and perfect and devious. She is destructive.

There is fire on her fingertips.

She almost wishes there wasn't.

_

Mother is her teacher now. And she will learn from her mistakes as pain is her punishment. She is seven years old and full of rage and spite, but Dad is here, Dad loves her and she loves him.

She wonders if this is how Zuzu felt all those years ago when she embarrassed him in front of Mai.

When mother is gone, and it's quiet, she goes to his room and he tells her stories, she tells him ones as well. Ancient legends of the Fire Lord. Myths and of the like, and he doesn't call her childish, he pats her head and tells her goodnight, because he knows she needs a way to cool from the inferno that is Mother. She loves Dad, and he loves her, and he is nothing like Father, he is better than Mom.

To cool from the fire on her fingertips.

There is nothing stopping her, she seers everything to a crisp. Nothing but ash leaves her wake. Her breathing is heaving, but she can go on. She is perfect. Mother won't hurt her if she meets expectations; they can't hurt her if she hurts them― no! She said she wouldn't do it like that. That was her downfall as Azula, it will not be her downfall as Enji.

She will become a hero, she promises by Agni's name.

_

Sixteen- she remembers what it was like to be sixteen. She remembers blue embers and lightning and fire. She remembers drowning and freezing, then she remembers breathing. She remembers letting everything go and sobbing. She had lost, and to Zuzu no less. But now, in this life, she realizes that beating everyone isn't everything.

There is fire on her fingertips, but she wants to help others.

Mother sends her off to the Yuuei entrance exam; she says that if Enji fails he has no right to live in that home. Mother is not like Dad, but she hasn't seen Dad in a while. Not since he was put in a velvet box under soil four years ago. She wonders if it affected Mother at all, the woman never seemed to love anyone at all.

The feeling erases from her eyes, she lived without love for so long. She can do this, she's always been the victor. Stronger than Zuzu, but she was crazy. Maybe if she's the best here, Mother will love her. She just has to be the best hero in her generation and those to come. She has to be. Otherwise, Mother won't look at her, she won't be treated like Zuko. She is better.

There is fire on her fingertips, and it is being smothered by the need for attention.

Mother always knew best, that why she let Azula burn, right?