★ YOU BELONG WITH ME ★
CONFUSING FEELINGS

          her eyes hurt. They burned, as if the ointment that Collie had mixed together had gotten into her eyes. Like Maliah rubbed her eyes after cutting chili peppers. As if the wind had blown many small grains of sand into her eyes. She was only aware of her surroundings in a blur. Her eyes were overstrained, they kept wanting to fall. But Maliah kept walking anyway. She wanted to get out of this underground as quickly as possible.

     They had already crossed the dark tunnel and were now walking between old ruins. It looked like an old city that had long been forgotten. It was somehow eerie. Not that Maliah was afraid, but she was glad not to walk alone through the silence, the escaped howl of the wind and the darkness.

     Cyno, unlike usual, wasn't running far ahead. He walked next to her, at her slow pace. She didn't know why. But it was kind of nice not to have to see his back all the time.

     »Do you know this place?« She looked at him sideways. »Have you already been here?«

     He shook his head. »No.« He didn't meet her gaze. He was too busy keeping an eye on there surroundings. »I usually don't allow myself to be persuaded to walk through this area.«

     »Or even falling down,« she added, muttering.

     »Worse has happened to me.« Cyno grabbed her arm and pulled her back. »Trip hazard,« he added as she looked at him confused. »You should pay more attention.«

     »That's why I have you.«

     Cyno walked over the line and ran his hand down her arm, to her hand. He held her and helped her over the line. She didn't know what to think of his touch. She didn't know why she got goosebumps. But she was also far too tired to think about it.

     »So you trust me?«, he asked. »My judgment?«

     »I think so.«

     »Good, because I definitely think that if you don't sleep in the next few hours, you'll die.« Yes, Maliah thought so too. »I would prefer if you continued to live.«

     »Is that so?«

     »Listen, you're clearly sleep deprived and before we go in there you should get some sleep.« He pointed, it was not far away from them, to a stone gate and there behind a crumbling staircase. Yes, if he hadn't shown her, she definitely wouldn't have noticed the stairs or the tripping hazard. »We still have enough time to arrive on time.«

     »It's cold and uncomfortable and I miss the quiet animal noises at night.« She sighed. »I can't relax in this environment.«

     »But you have to, Maliah.« He said her name. He never said her name otherwise. It was new, unfamiliar. But it didn't bother her. She kind of liked it. Cyno sat down on the dusty ground and leaned against the large stone, which may have once been part of a building. »Even if you sleep for 16 hours now, we still have enough time.«

     16 hours. She certainly wouldn't need that much, but it sounded tempting. »You're just saying that so I don't worry.«

     »Possible.« He crossed his arms. His typical pose. »We'll find your sister, but not if you pass out because of your tiredness after three days.«

     Three days. They had been traveling for the first three damn days and to Maliah it felt like a whole month. How was she supposed to manage this mission? Well one thing was clear, she had spent a whole day walking through ruins with only four hours of sleep that came from two nights together. And Cyno was right, if this continued she would definitely die. And she didn't want to die in the desert. She wanted to die in her beloved forest.

     »Come here.« Cyno stuck his hand out, sure he wanted her to put hers in it. But she didn't. She was just confused.

     »W-what?«

     He tilted his head to the side, looking almost empathic. »I don't bite, come here.« She hesitated for a few seconds before placing her hand in his. He gently raised her down between his legs and pulled her against him so that her back was leaning against his chest. She didn't want to admit it, but her heart was suddenly pounding faster.

     Cyno placed the blanket around them both, wrapping his arms around her to keep the blanket closed in front of her. He held her tightly. He hugged her. And yes, that meant she wasn't too cold anymore, but it was so damn unusual. She never thought Cyno would allow her to get so close to him. In fact, she was pretty sure he never let anyone do it.

     »I can't light a fire here so.« Yes, that probably wouldn't be so smart. Something could burn and there was nothing lying around here anyway.

     »It's quite comfortable«, She interrupted him quietly.

     »Good. Sleep now.«

It was stupid, but because of his warmth and the calm rhythm of his heart, Maliah fell asleep relatively quickly. It calmed down somehow. He somehow calmed her down. If she hadn't been so tired she would have laughed. Mr. Grumpy reassured her. She had to tell Kaveh!

Or maybe not. She didn't even want to imagine what conclusions he would come to.

It was the first time she'd had a break in the last two days. She hadn't woken up, nothing had disturbed her sleep. Honestly, she had slept just as well as in the bed Candace had given her. Maybe even better.

When Maliah slowly came to, she had no idea how long she had been asleep. She didn't know what day it was or what time, but Cyno knew for sure.

Cyno!

She slowly opened her eyes and then she realized that she was still in his arms. Not like the night before, she had slid down a little further, lying on her right side and resting her head on his chest. His left leg was over hers as if he was holding her tight, trying to keep her from slipping further away from him.

And his arms. He had it wrapped tightly around her. His right hand was even intertwined with hers. Had he not let go of her this whole time? That somehow made Maliah smile. She just couldn't help it.

»Cyno?«

»Hm?« And then she noticed that his chin was resting on her shoulder. His face was completely buried in the crook of her neck. She could feel his breath and it gave her goosebumps.

»You fell asleep.« It was more of a statement than a question to him. He didn't react to that. Did he fall asleep again? »Cyno?«

»I didn't fall asleep«, He murmured. His grip tightened and she felt him move a little. He made himself comfortable. He sighed and snuggled up to her. Was he really awake? Did he realize what he was doing? Maliah doubted that, but that didn't mean she didn't like it.

»I just closed my eyes and rested a little,« he whispered. He sounded tired. His voice was deep and really quiet. »I could't never fall asleep when you snore.« She never thought the thought would occur to her, but Cyno was, in his own way, kinda of cute. Especially his tired, morning voice and the way he cuddled up to her.

»Did you sleep well?«, He asked.

Maliah nodded. »It was kinda cozy.«

»Yeah, that's what I thought too.«

That's what he thought too? Honestly Maliah had no idea what was going on with him! Of course it was clear that he must find it comfortable and not horrible at all, but how he spoke to her.. it was different than usually.

»So now that you're well rested, you can continue traveling?«, He asked further

»That depends on whether you let go of me at some point today.« Maliah turned onto her left side and peered up at him. Cyno looked down at her and that's when she noticed that he wasn't even wearing his helmet. His white hair hung wildly over his shoulders. He looked good. Really, damn. Maliah hated herself for the thought, but she couldn't push it away either.

»Why you looking at me like that?«

»L-like what?«

A tiny smirk formed on his lips. »Do you really want me to say that?«

Oh my! He knew what she was thinking! Was it so obvious? Maliah pushed herself out of his arms. She pressed her left hand against his chest and released his grip with the other. »We should keep going,« she murmured and he let her get up from his arms.

»As you wish.«

Maliah decided to move forward. She didn't wait for him to pack up his things, she just went ahead. She also decided not to turn to him. She didn't want to see his stupid smile again. She could do without it. He had been confusing her ever since they left and she didn't like it! Because she didn't understand. She just didn't see any logical explanation for his behavior.

     Besides, she didn't have to turn to him to know he was following her anyway. She knew it. She heard his footsteps.

     The stone stairs were quite crumbly and Maliah had to be careful where she stepped. Every now and then they passed small corridors to their right and left. Maliah didn't know where they led. And since Cyno didn't seem to care, so Maliah just kept walking.

     It was a long staircase. It led straight up, wherever that was. And it gradually became brighter. They couldn't be far from the surface.

     »I don't trust stairs.« Cyno suddenly broke the silence. »Ask me why.«

     She didn't ask him why. She didn't turn to him either. Honestly not because she didn't want to. More because she was really embarrassed. Why had he cuddled her and why on earth had he had to grin at her?

     »Because they are always up to something.« She could hear from his voice that he was grinning at least a little. »Understood? Because they always lead up to something.«

Maliah had to laugh. But she didn't. She didn't laugh at his joke, which was clearly bad, but she found it kinda of cute how he explained each of his jokes. There was something about that and that's why a smile appeared on her lips. Luckily he didn't see that.

     »You've never been so quiet for so long.«

     That was true. But shouldn't that actually please him? She always annoyed him. He should be glad that she was quiet and wasn't babbling.

     »Well, I have nothing to say to you.«

     She heard him sigh. Why did he sigh? What did he want she said? That she had never slept so well and was really comfortable in his arms? Because that was it, but she wouldn't say that! She certainly wouldn't say that he looked absolutely handsome without his helmet either.

     Somehow she had the feeling that Cyno knew anyway. He had that certain look that definitely meant he knew what he had triggered. But why was he smiling? Was that what he wanted to achieve? That would make even less sense!

     He grabbed her hand and turned her to face him. She held her breath, watching him look at her through his dark lashes. He was so close to her. His face was so close to her.

     »Unusual, you love saying what bothers you about me.«

     »Not true! Besides you've been acting completely different than usual.«

     »And you don't like that?«

     She liked it. She liked it a lot. And that annoyed her. It annoyed her that he behaved differently than usual. It annoyed her that she liked it. And above all, he annoyed her!

     »Are you serious? You've never talked to me, haven't even looked at me and now, of all times, when we're on our way to my s...«

     Sister. That's what she wanted to say: that she didn't understand him, his sudden change in personality and concern for her. But she couldn't get any of it out because he suddenly pressed his lips to hers.

     She panicked. Her muscles tensed and she stood there frozen, but his hand was on her cheek and his thumb was making movements that could have been nothing more than caresses and suddenly she was returning the kiss.

     He wrapped his other arm around her and pulled her so close that her body was pressed against his. He was so gentle, so different than she expected. She buried her hands in his hair, messing up his carefully tousled coiffure — but that wasn't enough, she wanted to mess up everything about him.

     And she hated that she had those thoughts. She hated that he made that happen to her. After all, she didn't like him, right? She couldn't stan him, right? He was always in a bad mood, couldn't smile... actually. Honestly, Maliah didn't know what to think or what she felt anymore.

     Cyno tensed his arm muscles and for a moment she thought his kiss would become even more passionate, but then he pulled away and looked at her. The thumb on her cheek moved to her lower lip, tracing its outline.

     »You should be careful,« he whispered, while she followed the movements of his lip as if spellbound. »You have to be careful what you say in the hallway.«

     What?

     Maliah pressed her hands against his chest and took a step back. She glanced behind her and, yes. She saw the end of the stairs, she saw a hallway through which a few people were walking, Eremites. They had done it. And Cyno had kissed her. To prevent the Eremites from noticing them.

     Great. That was great..

     »I don't think all the Eremites know that you are her sister and that she therefore has roots behind the wall,« he continued. »I'm not sure if some would still follow her if they know that and we want to find her alive, correct?«

     »And i want that you never touch me again, Cyno.« He cocked his head to the side and took the step toward her that she had just backed away. »I'm seriously!« Maliah shook her head. »Don't grab me, don't come close to me and especially don't kiss me again!«

     »And if I liked it?«

     »You did it so the Eremites wouldn't find out.« The same smile appeared on Cyno's lips as when she had stared at him. »Stop smiling like that!«

      »And that fact clearly bothers you.« He nodded very slowly. »Why, Maliah?«

     Because she had wanted him to kiss her, because he wanted to. Not because of the mission. But she didn't say that. She turned away from him instead. »I hate you, Cyno.«

     »Yeah, I don't think so,« He called after her, amused.