The Art of Smoking

There's nothing more irritating than people smoking on the public transport.

When it happens in a public place, you still have an option to move somewhere else. But in a bus or train, where even a place to stand is luxury, smokers irritate the most.

There are different places where people smoke in a train.

The ones from small towns or villages (who must think it's perfectly OK to do so) smoke right where they are sitting. These are the ones who are scolded the most.

The daily commuters bring out some special words for such people. Though using those words in public is bad too, I don't mind them when used for such a good cause.

The slightly knowledgeable people (who know the reaction they'll receive for such an offence) move to the door to smoke. I just don't understand their logic behind it.

The train is moving ahead, air is rushing in with all its might. There's no way the smoke they let out is going to go it. Sooner or later, it finds its way into the compartment.

And when it does, special words start to ring again.

You'd still that the doors ahead are all locked now. That this is the farthest the smokers can go.

But no!

The highly knowledgeable ones have already found a key to this door.

They lock themselves in the toilet to perform their sacred deed.

And let me tell you, the trick does work!

It's only when we go into the toilet that we come nose to nose with all that smoke. And by the time we realize that, the person is gone. Lost in the crowd.

I considered them as legends.

That was until yesterday though.

Because yesterday, I met an ultralegend on the bus.

Come on, take a wild guess how he must be smoking ...

Let me take you through that journey.

This boy boarded the bus a couple of stops after me. Even though the bus was empty, he stood there by the door.

These are air conditioned busses we are talking about. Their door opens and closes at every stop.

So he was standing there by the door, which is a pretty normal thing actually. People do that all the time. Even I like standing there. The space is wide enough to stand relaxed and has sufficient support to save ourselves from the jerks.

His standing there wasn't anything out of ordinary.

It was what he did after that spiked my interest.

For three consecutive stops after that, he used to go out as soon as the bus stopped and take a look at here and there. Then when all the other passengers got on, he would come back in.

At first, I thought he was searching for someone.

The theory would have been justified if it had happened only on one stop. But searching for someone for three consecutive stops, now that was definitely something out of ordinary.

He had my attention now.

I zoned myself out of the song I was listening. I zoned myself out of all the jerks of the bus. And strained all my senses only on this guy.

That's when I saw it. The miraculous art of smoking.

The moment he got out at the next stop, he let out a little puff of smoke. And the same thing repeated at the stop after that too.

It was really amazing to see as he didn't have any cigarette in his hand.

Here's what I'm guessing...

He must have sucked it all in before he boarded the bus. And then he was letting a puff out at every stop.

It's amazing. It really is. Completely risk free.

There's no way passengers in the bus would smell anything.

My salutes to the guy.

Ah, such a character. I'm very impressed.

"If not for anything else, I'm ready to travel every day just to meet such characters."