(Your POV)
Ignoring the events of yesterday, all of us were back in ORC, doing whatever we normally do. Only difference today was that I was on the couch with both my legs crossed whilst Asia sat between my legs. I had my head resting on her own with my arms crossed over her chest. I don't know why I was doing this, but Akeno told me I should stay close to everyone for my immortality powers to work better. Still, Asia was quite small and frail as opposed to my tall and durable self, so I swore to myself to protect this girl the best I could. Asia also has a gun in her bag now because I found a Luger handgun in the storage room. Do I think she'll use it? Probably not, but a friend suggested I at least give her something to protect herself. As we were relaxing in the clubroom, the door opened up to reveal two people. Both of whom seemed to be members of the church, judging from that aura of false superiority and white cloaks. Rias looked somewhat surprised by this, but she still welcomed them in.

"I take it you're members of the church?" Rias asked as she moved from her desk to sit next to me and Asia whilst Akeno stood behind us. "If you'd like, we can make some tea."

"No, we're in a hurry, so we'd just like to lay down the demands right now." The brown haired girl acted as though she was in charge, but that could not be farther from the truth. "The church demands that you devils must not interfere with the search for Excalibur unless it benefits the church and doesn't benefit the Devils."

"Can we know your names?" Akeno asked, and she may be good at hiding her emotions, but I could tell she was mad at the lack of manners these girls were showing. "Besides, we would like to know why there's church officials in Gremory territory in the first place."

"We get if you hate us, but please be the better side and show some respect to the host." I pointed out, not really liking these girls all that much already. "It's only fair."

"That's rich coming from someone who murdered a seal and wore their fur like it's nothing." The brown haired girl pointed to my selkie's cloak, and it is seal skin, just not one that I stole.

"I'm a selkie, so I can understand where your accusation comes from." I corrected the brown haired girl. "If you don't know what a selkie is, they're people who have magical voices by singing and can turn into seals when they put on their cloaks, which is effectively seal skin they're born wit."

"He does raise a point." The blue haired girl was infinitely more reasonable than the brown haired girl. "My name is Xenovia and this is Irina."I apologize for Irina's accusation..."

"(Y/N), and don't worry, people would assume that." I liked Xenovia much more than Irina because she's honest and isn't afraid to admit when she's wrong. "So what's this about excalibur? I thought it was thrown in a lake."

"That's what we'd want you to believe, however, the church just split it up into six fragments." Irina explained, and I was kind of mad that my book lied to me. "Three fragments were stolen from the church's possession, and we have reason to believe the fragments are here in Kuoh Town in the possession of a former priest."

"Are there any suspects as to who stole them, we could help you?" Rias asked as Akeno set down a tray of tea on the coffee table.

"We thought that an exorcist by the name of Freed was in possession of them, but he was found dead a long time ago." Xenovia explained, which is a name that sounds familiar. "He had a gunshot wound in the heart, but no excalibur."

Whoops.

"So now our only lead is that a former priest is working for the fallen angels now, and that the priest has the Excalibur fragments." Irina gave us the rundown, which isn't a whole lot to work with. "All we ask is that you provide support whenever we ask for it."

"What's in it for us?" Issei asked, and Irina glared at Issei for a moment before her expression softened into a confused expression. "You can't expect us to help you without anything in return."

"In return, the church doesn't come here and kill all of you." Irina says nonchalantly, but there was a problem with that, so I raised my hand. "What is it (Y/N)?"

"What if you're incapable of dying?" I asked, since I was pretty much immune to dying now. "Even if you tear me apart for an eternity, my body will reach a point where you can't hurt me anymore."

"Um..." Irina couldn't come up with an answer to my question, so Xenovia answered in her stead.

"I would say you'd be tortured, but you just said that'd eventually stop working, so I'd assume we'd bury you." Xenovia guessed, I guess she was just as confused as I was. "Still, we must ask that none of you get involved."

"It's unlikely that we'd get involved with Excalibur anyways, we can't even touch it." Rias explained, rendering this entire thing stupid, but then I noticed Kiba getting mad about something.

"With that settled, I suppose it's time for us to leave." Xenovia got up from her seat, and I was grateful for them leaving until Irina noticed Asia, who was silent during the whole encounter.

"Oh my god, is that Asia?" Irina asked rhetorically, as I noticed Asia flinch and hide even more into my arms, so I got ready to protect her at a moment's notice. "It is! How does it feel to be forsaken by god so much that you had to turn to devils? Guess you shouldn't have healed that devil!"

"I still pray to god..." Asia defended herself, and even I was getting a headache just by saying his name, and Asia's going the full nine yards, I respect that. "So I try..."

"Oh my god, do you hear this Xenovia?" Irina and Xenovia now stood directly in front of Asia and I, with Xenovia not really looking that interested. "She still prays to god, you know, there is still a way for you to go to heaven."

"Really?" Asia sounded hopeful, and I didn't like where this was going, given how Xenovia was now gripping her sword.

"You just need to be killed by a servant of god."

"ASIA!"

In a flash, Xenovia attempted to slash at Asia, and Issei tried getting between us with his sacred gear, but he wasn't fast enough. So I raised my arm and took the sword swing directly, causing Xenovia's sword to become lodged in my arm. I pulled a towel out my pocket to wipe off any blood that got on Rias or Asia, all while glaring at Xenovia. Irina was shocked by this, but not as much as Xenovia, who was watching as my arm began healing with jade scales. The healing factor effectively pushed Xenovia's sword out of my body before healing the wound entirely.

"I told you, I have an invincible body." I didn't move at all, just continued staring at the two servants, and then Kiba finally had enough.

"I challenge you two to a duel!" Kiba insisted, which is weird because he was quiet this entire time.

"I'll help him." I volunteered as I stood up, carefully placing Asia on the couch as I walked towards Genbu, my shield in the corner of the room. "Any threats must be eliminated."

(Timeskip, brought to you by (Y/N) and Issei posing dramatically)

Due to Xenovia and Irina's overconfidence, they suggested we fight 3 v 2, so it was Issei, myself, and Kiba vs the two. I had Genbu at the ready as well as a combat knife, Issei had his sacred gear out, and Kiba summoned a sword. The two girls unsheathed their swords while Issei and I nodded at one another agreeing we would fight side by side. Our plan was for Issei to power himself dramatically while I keep our opponent busy, then when she's worn out, Issei finishes her off.

"Begin!"

Kiba almost instantly decided to take on Irina, leaving Xenovia to us. Xenovia tried crushing me with her greatsword, but I managed to block the slash thanks to my shield before using my desert eagle to shoot at Xenovia. Xenovia leaped back to dodge my bullets while Issei stood behind me, boosting his power. Xenovia landed on the ground, allowing me to shoot at her with my gun, but Xenovia side stepped to dodge the bullets before she tried flanking me by running around me. In response to this, I pressed the button on my shield and out my gun in my pocket. The anchor shot out directly in front of Xenovia, obstructing her path as I grabbed onto the chain. I swung the chain so it would hit Xenovia's chest, causing her to block it.

I pulled the chain back to me using the reel function of the shield, causing the hook parts of the anchor to pull Xenovia towards me. Xenovia planted her sword into the ground, trying to step her from getting closer to me, but I yanked on the chain, causing Xenovi's grip to waver. I decided to go the opposite approach to this because Xenovia refused to let go. I let my feet go off the ground and the anchor pulled me towards Xenovia, catching the swordsman off guard as I drop kicked her stomach.

Thanks to my strength, she was sent back a couple feet before she tried charging at me with her sword. She surpassed me in swordsmanship, so I bashed my shield against her and attempted to strike her side with the anchor, but Xenovia blocked my strike and attempted to slash at me. I blocked the sword swing with my anchor and swept a kick underneath Xenovia's feet, but she jumped up to avoid my feet. I threw my anchor, causing the ethereal chain to materialize, so I grabbed onto the chain and began swinging at Xenovia. Xenovia was forced back to my unpredictable swings until I pulled the chain upwards then downwards, causing the anchor to come crashing down on top of the girl. Xenovia dodged the swing and came towards me once again, slashing and I blocked the swing using my shield.

I reeled the anchor back before kicking Xenovia in the stomach, careful not to hit her chest because I heard a woman's chests were sensitive. Since I refuse to strike a man in the balls, I figured I'd do the same for women's chest. I reeled my chain back into the shield and watched Xenovia get pulled back to me thanks to the anchor. I let the swordsman's body ram into my shield before I heard Issei shout something.

"Ready!"

In response to this, I grabbed onto the anchor and tied the still stunned Xenovia in chains to hold her in place. Xenovia couldn't move due to me being stronger than her in terms of strength. Xenovia struggled as Issei ran towards her, but his hand wasn't in a fist like I was expecting, it was opened. I assumed he was going to be one of those people who fight with their palms, but the moment his palm touched Xenovia's shoulder, her clothes suddenly exploded off like they were filled with too much energy. Since I had clothes to spare, I gave Xenovia my selkie's cloak and wrapped it around the girl, covering up everything except her hands and face. I then turned my attention to Issei, who looked confused, so I held my annoyance in until I heard his explanation.

"I thought you wanted me to use the humiliation combo?" Issei justified, so I pressed further as to why he thought that. "Isn't the humiliation combo code a nod?"

"No, it's when I mouth the word 'humiliation'." I sighed, I wasn't mad at him because it was a simple mistake, and we set up this code just last night, so it's bound to have a few issues. "Besides, we're supposed to save that move for opponents we can't beat."

"Wait, you're Issei?" Irina gasped as she walked towards Issei, but I didn't see Kiba anywhere. "What happened to you?"

"Wait you're THAT Irina?!" Issei and Irina appear to have some history, leaving the rest of us confused. "I thought you were a boy!"

"Mark that down as something you should never tell a girl, ever." I typed on my phone as Irina slapped Issei, causing him to spin continuously until he was caught by me. "So...how did he mistake you for a man?"

"He and I used to play together when we were kids and before I became a church official." Irina answered, as Issei looked unconscious. "It was before my chest grew, and I'm ashamed of him that he became a perverted devil."

"I guess that would make sense." Koneko commented whilst glaring at Irina's chest in envy, but a Koneko with a large chest wouldn't be Koneko, they'd be unbalanced.

"By the way, where's Kiba?" Rias asked, most likely worried for her knight piece. "I saw him leave in a bad mood after your fight with him."

"I'm not sure, and I don't care about filthy devils." Irina brushed it off as she and Xenovia began walking off.

"But one of these 'filthy devils' gave me his cloak after your childhood friend destroyed my clothes." Xenovia pointed to me, who was still making sure Issei didn't fall. "Plus it's his skin, so I should give it back to him."

"Akeno, you look around the same size as Xenovia, is there any chance you have a spare uniform or clothes in general?" I asked, but I wasn't entirely sure because I was an entire foot taller than her and it was hard to tell.

"I think so, let me go check the clubroom though." Akeno walked off, leaving us alone in an awkward silence.

"So, do you guys know where the church here is?" Irina asked, and I don't remember the directions to the church, maybe Koneko, Rias, or Asia knows.

"It pains me to say this, but the old church building was burned down a couple days ago." Rias informed the two church officials, and I remember that I burned the old church down to force the fallen angels to leave. "However, you can stay in the old school building with us."

"We refuse to accept kindness from filthy devils." Irina crossed her arms, causing all of us to look at Xenovia, who was still wearing my cloak. "Xenovia, you're not helping."

"But (Y/N)'s half selkie."

"..."

(Timeskip, brought to you by Raynare, Kalawarner, Dohnaseek, and Mittlet sitting on one of the the sandy beaches of Hawaii, since they have nowhere better to be)

"And that's why they're staying with us."

I just finished explaining the situation to both my parents, who were now sitting at the kitchen table to listen to me. Irons and Xenovia sat on either side of me, with Xenovia wearing a spare Kuoh Academy uniform Akeno just so happened to have on hand. My mother was making dinner since tonight was her turn, her short brown hair was tied in a small ponytail as I finished explaining.

"So you, a devil, are letting two church officials with HOLY WEAPONS, stay at our house?" Natalia had a hard time processing the levels of stupid this idea was. "Why do you think this is a good idea?"

"Because I have an invincible body and can't die." I answered without missing a beat, followed by my father agreeing with this whole idea.

"Well now we have more than enough space since you defeated that Riser guy, so I suppose they can stay." My father decided to roll along with it. "Besides, a friend of (Y/N) is a friend of mine."

"Keep in mind if you hurt either of my boys, I will not hesitate to kick both your culos into the ocean close to our house." Natalia threatened as she held a kitchen knife tightly.

"I wasn't planning on it." Xenovia answered in a calm and collected voice that rivaled my own. "(Y/N) helped me out, therefore I owe him."

"By the way, (Y/N), are you secretly trying to be a playboy?" Natalia asked as she turned around to go back to making dinner. "I noticed the vast majority of people you know happen to be girls with impossible bodies."

"I believe being a playboy is Issei's dream, my dream is just to protect everyone." I recalled before thinking about what Natalia said. "Though now that you mention it, I suppose most of them do have a ridiculous chest size."

"I have officially failed Issei..." Irina placed her head on the table in a solem fashion, so I proceeded to pat her back to try and comfort her.

"There there..."

"I'm serious about the ridiculous bodies, like high school girls should NOT have breasts that big." Natalia commented as I heard her cutting something, which must be carrots judging from the smell. "Hey (Y/N), do them a favor and learn some massage techniques, breasts that big are gonna cause some serious back pain."

"I'll look into that after I eat." I promised, making a mental note to look up massage techniques for everyone. "By the way, Dad, are you planning on getting a new job or are you going to retire? You can retire if you'd like, I'd be more than happy to work so you won't."

"I appreciate it (Y/N), but I got a new job earlier today." My father answered, and I felt bad for making him work. "I'm working as a delivery driver since I'm not going out to sea anytime soon."

"I understand, I hope the best for you." I was glad my father was getting a job, since from what I've seen so far, he likes being busy.

Wait, am I becoming a 'Harem King'?

(A/N: You know, people told me they like this book better compared to other DxD books and they can't figure it out. Well I'm not trying to toot my own horn here, but I am going to list off some things I did differently compared to other fanfics and maybe the reason why people like his book. My biggest guess is that it's because I made the MC flawed, which makes him feel so much more real/likable, hence why I encourage writers to give their characters flaws. Don't know what this MC's flaw is? Well it's clearly an inferiority complex the size of the Mongol Empire. Another thing I do, the Mc isn't a stereotypical DxD MC. By that I mean he doesn't call Rias a bitch, make up some "deal" to stay in the general area, beat up/kill Issei for being a pervert, have sex with the entire female cast, then become the most powerful being because of a "secret sacred gear that is totally stronger than the boosted gear trust me guys" or using the powers of "a secret devil family that was wiped out because they were too OP". This MC is just a glorified sea doggo that is grateful to be around people who genuinely like him.