Mrs. Hudson sent Sherlock to the grocery store. Meanwhile, I clear the table. After a few minutes I lie on the couch.

He said we were friends. Best friends.

I am a little disappointed. Just best friends? I think he's playing it safe. He does not know what he feels. Or thinks.

I don't want to get in his way. I don't want to turn his head. I don't want to accelerate his heart.

***

Today I go out to the store. Again.

"Maybe you bump into a second John Watson." Mrs. Hudson said.

"Mrs. Hudson, though it is... No-one can replace him." I secretly hoped John didn't hear that, but I heard him giggle into the hallway. Hopefully he does not blame me. If I am spontaneous, then I express all my feelings. Accidentally.

Today I but two avocados and fresh corn. John showed me pictures of vegetables and I gave three times the right answer. There were thirty.

"And this..." John asked.

"An apple?" I doubted. I never saw that thing in my entire life before.

"A vegetable, Sherlock." He insists. I waited a few seconds to answer and I sighed deeply. My last gamble.

"A banana?" He threw the photos on the ground and he came close to me. I breathes his breath and he mine.

"A carrot, Sherlock. A carrot." I was dumbfounded. A carrot is green, right? He nickered. "How can you not know?"

"Because I cleared all that useless information out of my memory."

"So you had space for your 243 sorts of ash?" He reacted surprised. I nodded.

I'm finally home and I greet Mrs. Hudson. She is working in her small kitchen. She does the dishes.

I hop upstairs. The table is completely cleaned. The vase of this morning still stands there. Not a soul was be seen. I put the bag on the table and I cross my arms. I take the vegetables and I'm looking for a place.

No, not with the severed thumbs.

"Mrs. Hudson!" She walks up the stairs with her low-heels. "Where is John?"

"He's gone."

No, no, no. This cannot be true. Is this a joke?

I run to his room, but it is completely empty. Even his received clothes are gone. I stroll down the stairs. My eyes feel tired. My eyes are closing. The last thing I see, are black spots, which make me feel completely empty. The steps are forcing against my back. My head is spinning. My whole body trembles.

***

"Sherlock, what did you do?" Mrs. Hudson beats on my cheeks. I'm still at the font of the stairs. "Were you forgot a sort of ash?" She is trying to pull me right, but I have no pep in my legs.

"Mrs. Hudson?"

"Yes, Sherlock. I need to call a doctor?" She immediately reminds me of John.

"No. Just stay with me." I pull her to me and she kneels on the ground. She takes my hands and she gives her warmth to me. "Ooh, John." I say ignorant.

"What did you say?" Mrs. Hudson had pointed out my mistake but half. "John? I have to pick up him?" She stands up, but I hold her tight.

"Stay."