CHAD's POV

Crazy.

If there is one word to describe how this week started, it is crazy.

Before all this, I was adamant to ignore the obvious—my feelings for Courtney. Reasoning out that these feelings were just passing, and all this was just a misunderstanding.

I cared for her because I was looking out for her, wanting to help her graduate in the right way—that was it. I ignored and refused to entertain the idea that it was something bigger. I didn't want to admit I had feelings for her. I was too much of a coward to confront them, and so I convinced myself that it was all about looking out for her.

For self-preservation.

But it was clear that these feelings were more than just a passing phase.

But still, I tossed it aside. After everything that happened, falling for someone was the last thing, even not a thing, in my mind. It wasn't part of my high school agenda. I told myself that once was enough.

There were many things I could do better in my free time than this—like finalize my college plans and pick my school already. Besides, after all this, I was certain that I would just leave everything behind and prioritize my new dreams.

But I didn't realize that part of my new dream was her.

Looking back, I was so sure that it wouldn't come to this. I would never have imagined it happening. I guess she felt the same.

In all honesty, I just made that deal to shut her up at the time and leave me alone. Her constant presence and persistence inconvenienced my activities—my actual plans. But as time went on, I found myself wanting to see her often and having her around always completes my day.

I thought at that time that if I set a very difficult and downright impossible task, she would back out and just let it go. This is because neither of us would fall on that thing called love anyway.

Never.

Never say never, I guess.

The memories made me chuckle. Her determination at the time was so steadfast, she was sure she could make it happen. She would make me fall for her.

Well, she succeeded. I could almost hear her say I told you so.

Looking back, I tried to recall at which point I started caring about her—really caring about her. That she became a permanent resident on my thoughts. That her smile were the reason of my sleepless nights.

It was crazy!

I tried my very best not to. I've been holding back, denying this feeling for some time now. But in the end, I couldn't help it anymore. I fell for someone I thought I could never love.

She has won without even realizing it.

The moment I realized my true feelings and couldn't deny them anymore, I told myself to stay away, to stop deluding myself, that it might end up the same as before. Same as Olivia.

Though I reasoned that Courtney was nothing like her, that this situation was completely different, I couldn't deny the facts. Plus how Jackson pointed things out. I had to accept that I was making the same mistake again. I tend to turn a blind eye to this. My judgement gets easily clouded.

At that time, I felt a sense of dread wash over me as I realized I was repeating the same pattern. I had to find a way to break it. So I listened to Jackson. He was my best friend after all.

He would know better, he would see things I refused to look at.

Besides, I didn't listen to him before and look where it got me? But that was a thing in the past now. No need to dwell on it, just learn from it.

At Courtney's birthday celebration, I didn't have any plans of attending, even though she made an effort to get her first A for this. Jackson kept saying it was a trap or something, that she made that kind of effort just for me to think differently about her. Jackson wasn't impressed that she moved her party and invited everyone, as he knew there was always an ulterior motive.

At that time, I decided not to go to shut him up. But god, I missed Courtney's smile. That day, all I wanted was to see her smile and everything would be fine. I remembered that she wanted sweets, so I asked my mom if she could help me bake a cake for Courtney.

I'd never seen her so eager and excited like that, too bad the first cake burned, but that didn't stop us from making another one. That was the time Jackson came over unannounced. He had a hunch, and it turned out to be true.

He didn't try to stop me at that time though, I guess he must have thought it was too late already. The cake was already made, so all he could do was come with me so I wouldn't do anything stupid. I settled on that.

I found myself thinking constantly about Courtney after that party. I thought of her smile, and the way she ran to me and... hugged me. I was taken aback, unsure of what to do. I still tried my best to hold back, to remind myself that these feelings I have for her wouldn't do any good. It would be impossible. I was just complicating things.

But it was her birthday, and I wanted to hug her. The force was too strong to ignore, so I gave in.

Following that, I continued to distance myself from her. Drew some boundaries, and forcefully ignore her. I felt that I didn't want to, but I had to.

So when she sent me that message, I didn't really have any plans of showing up. I busied myself and convinced myself that she would just leave anyway. It is unlikely that she would stay that long if I weren't there within 30 minutes.

But then, the thought of her waiting, that maybe she was still there—knowing how determined and stubborn she was sometimes, made me feel so uneasy. I was right. She waited for me for hours, and when I finally arrived she had tears in her eyes. I had no idea, and I felt terrible for making her wait and being drenched by rain.

I didn't hold back anymore. I ran towards her without knowing that moment would change everything. That it would make me the happiest guy in the world.

Until now, I was unsure how this happened. I had no idea she felt the same way as I do, and it was crazy.

Now that the deal is off the table, I didn't have to overthink things and doubt her actions anymore. There was no doubt in my mind that what she did was true this time. Not just for the sake of exam papers, or winning. I was finally able to trust her without a doubt. I felt relieved and trusting her felt really nice.

And even though we're in a relationship now, I still won't forget about my promise of helping her graduate. I will still help her with that part. On top of that, I have to find out her plans after high school. It's something we haven't discussed yet.

But before that, I have a mission and this needs to be done now.

I have to tell Jackson.

"Hey, congratulations!" Jackson cheered as he placed his food tray on the table. We were in the cafeteria, the place I planned to tell him about me and Courtney since I couldn't get hold of him.

I was taken aback by what he said though. Did he know already? But who told him? He's not mad or something? No lectures? He was genuinely happy even! I couldn't believe it, he was actually happy for me and Courtney?

It made me think, who had he talked to about it? "Who told you about it?" I had to ask.

"Your mom." He answered nonchalantly as he bit into his mac and cheese.

My mom? I hadn't told my mom about Courtney and I yet! How did she know? Did she have a hunch?

"Why are you acting so surprised? Is it supposed to be a secret?" Jackson frowned in confusion.

"No, it's just that..." I started with a laugh. Boy, I thought this would be difficult! "I thought you wouldn't like it."

"What?" Jackson laughed. "I didn't know I have a say on your future now. Besides, it's an outstanding school! I know you would get it, plus it was your dream, right?"

I stopped whatever word I was about to say and asked "What are you talking about?"

"Stanford. You were offered a scholarship for your English major, right? Your mom was so happy and excited. I am too! I knew you could do it even without the athletic scholarship you were aiming for when we were still swi—" Jackson stopped mid-sentence, and looked at me as if I had grown an extra head. "Why? What were you talking about?"

I hesitated for a second, but there's no need to hide this anymore. I have to tell him about this anyway. It's better to do it sooner than later. "Courtney."

"What about her?" His expression changed, all the happiness was gone. Okay, this will be a long talk. "I talked to her. Don't get angry please. It's for the better anyway."

I was about to protest, but he kept talking. I didn't have a chance to intervene. "I admire her though, at least she still has a heart and finally stopped all her games. She won't bother you anymore."

I smiled at this, eager to let him know that he was right. We dropped whatever game we were playing, because this time, it's real. "Well, actually, she's..."

The next two words, my girlfriend, dissolved in my mouth the moment I saw her enter the cafeteria.

She had her hair curled up, bright red lipstick on, a mini skirt, and high heels that she weren't comfortable of wearing. But that wasn't the reason I felt my heart breaking at the moment. It was the person she was with.

"Yeah, she's back with Troy. Football team returned last night. Right timing, huh? At least she's back to who she really is and has stopped playing with you. Oh well, I told you so."

--END OF CHAPTER 41--

A/N: OOOOOPPPPPPS. Did you see that coming? Share your thoughts!

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