I got a phone in my senior year. And obviously anytime I got data,  you know what I do. I'm so addicted. I no longer cared. I already thought the end of it is hell fire and I'll gladly accept it for I was so deep into this.

Many a times I won't sleep at night,  watching this (porn). I even wrote a story and my friends  read it and were like how did I know those stuffs? I just shrugged it off and smiled, lying it's imagination. Right at 14!

My extroverted friend would read 18+ rated stories and ask me to read them. She always wondered how I get unaffected with it. It was because I was past the stage.

It was going to be the end of the session. Our Literature Teacher recommended a book for us to read. It was about Pornography and ... Can't remember well.

I wanted to so get out of this world now. Because it was scaring me how I depended so much on it. So I read the book.

It told the experiences of people who were like me and how they got into the world. It surprised me that it was a mental disorder in a kind of way and their stories were similar to mine. 

I also learnt the effects, like keeping a discreet life people don't know,  fear of insecurity, after marriage effects, severe addiction e.t.c

So I accepted who I was and tried to stop it but again,  it lasted only a few weeks. I was so tired of it. I regretted ever succumbing the first time. I blamed young innocent me!

I knew then,  I need rehabilitation!