This rant contains spoilers from episodes 127-134 of SAAKK.

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I guess I've never done this before, but I can't really help it. I have too many feelings. Too many opinions. Too many emotions to forgo letting it out. So, welcome to another rant on the previous week's episodes of SAAKK!

When I wrote my review last week, Anokhi had just about discovered that Shaurya had been kidnapped and had made up her mind to find him. Firstly, I wanted to take a bit of time to analyse the episodes which led up to the big confession and confrontation which spawned this rant! Although there were several logical fallacies (and several degrees of incompetence) displayed by the Sabherwal family, the cops and Anokhi as well (like seriously, I would have never let Vineet get away) in searching for Shaurya, I did enjoy the episodes that led up to Anokhi rescuing him.

One scene which was really touching and an allegory of sorts was the wall separating Shaurya and Anokhi in the kidnapper's den. She could hear him calling out to her, but she couldn't see him or hold him. And the physical wall separating them acts as a metaphor for a figurative wall which has always split them apart, whether it's misunderstandings, Shaurya's family or their contrasting ideologies. I liked the fact that even Anokhi acknowledges it as she struggles to listen to his responses, confirming the fact that theirs' is as much a star-crossed love story as it is an 'opposites attract' one.

It was obvious that Anokhi would outsmart the kidnapper easily enough because he's definitely a nincompoop. I mean, his threat was to make her sniff chloroform and -'Phir main tujhe aur tere aashiq ko ek saath baandh doonga!' Like seriously? I laughed so much when he said this.The entire #Shakhi fandom be like-

Shaurya and Anokhi's reunion was, of course, the highlight of the episode. And it felt so nice to hear 'Jo tera howega' after two weeks! However, I was facepalming continuously when the family members showed up before Shaurya could consciously figure out that it was Anokhi who'd saved him. I wasn't surprised when Anokhi took a step back and let his family embrace him. When she was sitting on the bench outside, and Ahir came and sat next to her, I loved that she actually placed her head on his shoulder for support quite instinctively. She is certainly relieved that Shaurya is safe, but it's also killing her that she can't be with him for it will only complicate matters and mislead him regarding the decision she's taken to move on. Ahir on the other hand, is disappointed that he couldn't do his duty well enough, and of course, seeing Anokhi dejected- makes him sad too.

If it were any other soap, most probably, Shaurya would've forgotten that Anokhi'd come for him and this'd be milked as a misunderstanding for several episodes. But thankfully, the writers don't go down that road. As soon as Shaurya regains consciousness to some extent, he immediately starts approaching Anokhi in order to speak to her, despite his family being against it. You can see how hard Anokhi is trying to play it casual, but her stoic veneer cumbles almost immediately when Shaurya is nearly hit by a car driven by our dearest 'Apshagun'. Shaurya nearly faints again (this dude really faints a lot, which again is a gender stereotype subversion, though I wish he wouldn't faint so dramatically) and is unable to meet her, but as they say, it's the thought that counts.

At the same time, three cheers for Babli di (I like how I keep calling her Di, even when there's no need to! It's just the vibe she gives off, right? She's such a warm person, everyone would want her as a sister) for finally catching Vineet. She totally deserved the salute she got. I did like how they edited the confrontations of Anokhi versus the kidnapper and Babli di versus Vineet, drawing girl power parallels between the two scenes. But I have to say this, I get that this show is feminist and all, but they have to stop making Ahir so inept at carrying out his duties. Apparently, both Anokhi and Babli run faster than him even though he's a cop.

Now getting to the juicier bits- Shaurya returns with his swag quotient intact in the next episode and this is when I realise that I've actually stayed at Taj Krishna when I was a child. It's nice to see them shoot here! When Shaurya decides to meet Anokhi (honestly, I was rolling my eyes at him. Like how many times is he going to say so before actually doing it?) And that's when Devi's histrionics start. She fakes a heart attack and this prevents Shaurya from meeting Anokhi. Shaurya is visibly distressed and agrees to forgive Devi pretty easily for her mistakes. This is when the dreaded moment comes. Many episodes ago, Shaurya had given her a blank promise of sorts and she uses it here to blackmail Shaurya into getting engaged to Shagun.

Although Devi's drama had me tearing my hair out, I love that Shaurya put up a solid fight before hastily exchanging rings with Shagun. He made a lot of realistic and valid points about what makes a marriage click. If he isn't happy, how is it that he could ever be a source of happiness for others? Why is it that people are always forced to make sacrifices with respect to marriage in their family? He even calls Devi out on her actions and says that it's emotional blackmail, and this itself is a big step forward for Shaurya who used to believe in Devi blindly without question. I swear if it were someone like Anurag from KZK in this scene, he'd have exchanged rings without uttering a word of protest. Ideally, he should've seen through Devi's sham of a heart attack, but it's a difficult thing to expect, isn't it? It's obvious that Shaurya will forever consider himself to be in Devi's debt because she's the one who took care of him even when she had no obligation to do so. She's been the only one who put him above all else- something he's yearned for over the years not only from his estranged mother, but also his physically present, but mentally absent father. Anyway, I'm sure Shaurya will see the light eventually...the maternal love that's clouding his judgement right now will eventually fade once he sees more of Devi's sociopathic tendencies. But I know that's not going to be ANY time soon...

I have two sneaking suspicions about our dynamic duo- Shagun and Devi. I've always wondered, what is it that drives Devi's mania about smothering Shaurya and keeping all his love and attention directed towards her and no one else? What is she so insecure of? From the very beginning, I've felt that Tej and Devi's decision not to sire an offspring of their own was not much of a choice. I have a strong suspicion that either Devi is barren or Tej is impotent. Most probably, it's the latter because if it were the former, I would've expected someone like Tej to cast Devi aside and marry someone else. Anyway, if I were the writer I would definitely play with this plot (but sadly, I'm not). It would also make sense as to why Tej has such high regard for Devi despite treating the rest of the women in the family like dirt.

On the other hand, I now strongly suspect that Shagun has an ulterior motive for coming back into Shaurya's life. I mean, she seemed so sensible in the holi episode when she refused to pursue Shaurya further after realising that he was in love with Anokhi. Phir kaun si bhayanak ghatna ghat gayi that she became some obsessed stalker type person? My money's on the fact that her family is broke or something and she's trying to use this marriage as a way out. Anyway, in my opinion, this wouldn't be a very good future plot to spend time on...it's been done way too many times before.

And now we get to the really good bit (or really bad bit, based on what your perspective is)- the whole #Shakhi confrontation that we'd been waiting for for nearly two weeks.

I'll be very honest, when I saw the promo of Shaurya putting sindhoor on Anokhi (did I say putting? I meant flicking a fistful of it on her face), I was quite disappointed. There were two reasons for this-the first being that Anokhi is barely twenty years old and the whole point of this show is supposed to be about her following her dreams. Of course, I did want to see Shaurya and Anokhi married at some point in the future (and this is something new for me- those who know me well know that I never advocate marriage for practically any couple LOL), but not now...not like this. I thought it was way too soon for the makers to pursue this track when there was so much more story to tell before this. The second reason I was disappointed was that the majority of the fandom on social media was actually happy seeing them wed. And that had me wondering- if they're happy with this, aren't they rendering the message of the show as moot?

However, when Saturday's episode finally came out, I was pleasantly surprised and quite satisfied with the level of maturity with which they handled Shaurya and Anokhi's confrontation. Firstly, when Shaurya finally found Anokhi at the temple, I did not expect him to hug her so openly. It's because he'd never been so physically expressive of his affection for her before this and it definitely took me by surprise. Although I did laugh at Anokhi's shocked expression at having been engulfed rather aggressively, I found it sweet when she tightened her palms around his hand once she realised it was him.

And then it begins- a severe conflict in my head about what exactly I want to happen. One part of me(the skeptic) thinks he should just apologise to her about the whole engagement announcement and explain himself. He should be truthful about the fact that he's engaged right now! Another part of me thinks (the #Shakhi fan)- 'I wish they'd forget everything and hug it out already!' One part of me says- 'No Anokhi! Do not melt and forgive him!' The other part of me is like-'My poor baby's been through a lot too! Just tell him what he wants to hear so desperately! I know you want to say it too!'

Well, we all know what happens next and I have to say that it was definitely one of the most unique mutual love confessions I've seen on Indian TV. Their whole 'I love you more' exchange makes absolute sense because everything between them has always been an argument, so why not have a debate on this as well? It honestly reminded me of the 'I love you 3000' line from 'Avengers Endgame'. Consequently, this post on my instagram account-

Their euphoria at having confessed their feelings was beyond infectious and couldn't help but smile ( the #Shakhi fan in me is jumping, btw) at their childish antics. The aerial shot of Shaurya picking Anokhi up and twirling her around was definitely beautiful (though I did want to see a close up as well- the editors did us dirty here) , and the foolish grin on Shaurya's face when he falls down by accident was just beyond adorable (though later I discovered in KV and Deba's live that they actually fell accidentally and for some reason the editors decided to keep the shot. Is it weird that I think it's a euphemism for the realism versus escapism the show is trying to provide? SMH, I'm thinking too much...) Some of the best caps from the episode-

Also, can I just say, they run hand-in-hand just like teenagers.

However, these moments of ecstasy are short-lived when Anokhi remembers Devi's engagement announcement and her conversation with Shagun about Shaurya's mentality. And this is where the episode finally takes off, in my opinion. Everything about their conversation was very realistic and organic and I have to laud the writers for the dialogue in this sequence.

The first thing I appreciated was the fact that Anokhi was absolutely truthful with him. I was half afraid that she would retract her words and pretend that she doesn't love him (and was just playing with his feelings or something) just so that he starts to hate her while she still pines for him. I mean, we've become so used to such sacrificial tracks in daily soaps that I wouldn't have been surprised if they'd opted to do this. Instead, she accepts that she loves him with all her heart, but that doesn't mean that she's ready to compromise on her dreams because of it. The points she makes about them being poles apart and why their relationship will not work in practicality will, I'm sure, strongly resonate with today's millennials as well.

Anokhi's dialogues have the best answer to the 'Is love enough to sustain a relationship?' question that everyone has wondered about at some point or the other. Of course, Shaurya doesn't know exactly why these thoughts are spinning in her head (obviously because of her conversation with Shagun, which I absolutely don't blame Shagun for, by the way. I felt that Shagun's motives might have been wrong, but Anokhi needed to hear all of Shaurya's past relationship history), and he tries his best to placate her. That was also one of the best things about the scene- the fact that Shaurya is so brash and abrasive otherwise when he doesn't get his way, but here- he did make a sincere effort to hear her out and address her fears.

When Anokhi finally questions him about why his engagement with Shagun had been called off, Shaurya is nonplussed and goes into an immediate defensive mode, as expected. We all know that he hates expressing and talking about his true emotions (especially when these emotions open up old wounds that he's tried hard to forget about in the last twenty-five years), and he fails to articulate the main reason why he's always wanted a home-maker as a wife and the deep sense of abandonment and rejection he has due to Aastha's departure. Instead what comes out of his mouth is, 'Toh yeh sab chahiye tumhe? Tum mujhse pyaar nahi karti...'

When Anokhi expresses her frustration as to why it should be a choice between being with him and pursuing a career, I was genuinely moved. I can imagine an umpteenth number of girls in the country expressing the same, but to deaf ears. However, Shaurya's way of convincing her to give their relationship a chance, is to say that he's now a changed man now and is willing to make a compromise and I quote 'figure something out' as to how Anokhi could be with him and fulfil her dreams at the same time. It's his fear of losing her that's speaking at this point, and Anokhi knows that in due time, they may grow to resent each other, for it's not his general perception of women that has changed-he's just willing to make an exception for her and later might regret his decision to do so.

It's not only Anokhi who says a lot of wise things- some of Shaurya's dialogues have the same punch. Especially when he says 'Jahaan pyaar hota hai, wahaan ego nahi hota', especially when he's proven to her that he has been able to put her happiness and well-being above his ego in two instances (though he still has a long way to go)- the first being when he apologised to her for denigrating her character, and the second- when he swallowed his pride and apologised to ACP Ahir just because he didn't want her to be worried about him. Also, when he says, 'Main kuch bhi karoonga, tumhare liye...', you can't help but feel sad for him due to the desperation in his voice.

It was especially heartbreaking to see how Shaurya cups Anokhi's face again and again in helplessness, pleading her to stay, and you can see that it's getting harder and harder for her to push him away. So much so, that she turns around and makes a run for it, leaving him alone once again, while he cries out for her in anguish-just as he had years ago as a mere four year old when Aastha left. The parallels in the scenes are actually astonishing if you ask me-

And that's when his switch flips. The same switch that flips every time he feels like she's leaving him for good- the same switch that flipped when he assumed that she was just leading him on and actually had feelings for Ahir, the same reason he practically kidnapped her while she was travelling to Kapurthala. His paranoia
(I suspect he gets that 'Train choot rahi hai' feeling like Geet did in 'Jab We Met'), makes him lash out and take a vat of vermilion and throw it on her forehead without asking for her consent claiming her as his as if she were an inanimate object.

How much ever of my 'poor baby' he is, I couldn't condone how wrong he was in this specific instance. The fact that he does so without Anokhi's consent is highly problematic and may even send the wrong message to a few naive viewers. And we have yet another daily soap where the marriage was a forced one (albeit, probably the most civilised forced marriage I've seen in a long time. I mean- in Ishqbaaz Shivaay blackmails Anika to marry him by threatening her brother, in IMMJ2 Riddhima is practically trapped in the house by Vansh until she marries him, and so on...Of course what happened in SAAKK is a dream in comparison, but the other shows set the benchmark really, really low).

I was definitely angry with Shaurya at this point (just as Anokhi was), but I was extremely amused to see that he still hadn't lost his sarcastic sense of humour when he retorted to Anokhi's question about his 70's film like stunt. I was extremely impressed with Anokhi when she called Shaurya out on his recklessness and deemed the marriage exactly what it was -a forced one- unlike other Indian TV female leads who would've suddenly become 'pativrata' or cried and run away without reprimanding the male lead. What's worse is that Shaurya refuses to see the error of his ways and repeatedly tries to convince her to give this relationship a chance and it's  evident that he is clearly not thinking straight at this point (this is why I feel that he needs a therapist).

When he remarks that he will 'allow' Anokhi to study ahead and have a career if she wishes, I was facepalming very strongly because I knew how triggered Anokhi would get. In fact, this was her exact point of contention even when she participated in a debate about gender equality in the first episode. In my head, I'm thinking- bahut sahi jaa rahe the Professor-If only you had said, 'I will support you' or 'Main tumhaara saath doonga' instead of 'I allow it', maybe she would've strongly considered accepting the relationship. Although Anokhi was right to taunt him about the whole 'permission thing' (Shaurya also doesn't realise why it's such a touchy subject for her because he hasn't seen the battles that she's had to fight first hand in order to gain her freedom), I couldn't help but think that the writers took cues from the scene in 'Dil Dhadakne Do' where Farhan Akhtar's character Sunny reproaches Rahul Bose's character Manav for his passively chauvinistic tendencies. If you haven't watched it, I suggest you do. The little girl is me-

When Anokhi finally confesses her fears of turning into another 'Aastha Sabherwal', this is where I felt the writing took a misstep of sorts. I get Anokhi's insecurity about what happened to Aastha, but asking Shaurya to mend his relationship with his mother just as a deal to have her accept the marriage is a seriously low blow. When Aastha has repeatedly asked Anokhi to stop judging Shaurya based on his treatment of her, and when she even apologised to Shaurya for interfering in their relationship, I thought she'd let the matter go.

Anokhi asks him if he's ever tried to understand Aastha's side of the story (which he does need to, I agree with that), but Anokhi needs to stop thinking that Aastha is blameless in the whole debacle that occurred years ago. Has Anokhi ever tried to assess the level of emotional trauma that Shaurya's faced as a result of it? Has she ever thought about what effect it had on him instead of Aastha?

I grew even more upset when she says- 'Jisne apne Maa ki haq ke liye nahi lada, woh mere liye kya ladega?' I was thinking in my head- has she ever heard Shaurya call Aastha 'Maa'? Hasn't she heard of the 'Janm dene waali se badi paalne wali' apothegm? Hasn't she seen how vociferously he stands against those who bad-mouth Devi (despite the fact that she deserves all of it)? Has she ever tried to understand how Shaurya has been gaslighted by Devi for several years, so much so, that it has practically altered his perception of what really happened? If Shaurya isn't an 'achcha beta', I don't know who is. It's just that he doesn't consider himself 'Aastha's beta'.

It would have even been alright if she'd asked Shaurya to make an effort to understand Aastha, but asking him to seedha 'give her jagah' in his life is not justified. Aastha's made it very clear that if Shaurya decides to forgive her because he's been influenced by someone instead of his own volition, she'll have none of it anyway, so why is Anokhi trying to bring this about? I was almost shocked when Shaurya actually agreed to give it a shot so that she'd at least give their relationship a chance. Karanvir was so endearing in this scene- especially when he says 'Mujhe pata nahin, ki main tumhare bina kya karoonga', swallowing his pride once again and admitting flatly that he needs her more than she needs him.

Anokhi does agree to give him a chance before she walks away but she's obviously distraught once she reaches the hostel room (or the hotel room disguised as the hostel room in this case, LOL). Even though she tries to wash the sindhoor away, she's unable to get rid of it fully, and this is understandable. Anokhi has never been one of those characters who'd be able to pretend that nothing happened, no matter how much she tries to project so in front of Shaurya. She is, after all, pretty traditional in many ways. It was nice to see a montage of all the moments which led to her falling for him in the first place, and I really like the background song 'Jaane De' that they chose for this scene. I didn't want her to admit to being Mrs. Sabherwal so soon, but the admission is also bittersweet because she knows that she has a rough road ahead.

The next episode was also memorable because of Aastha confronting Shaurya about his engagement with Shagun and Shaan and Aastha's conversation about the same. Devi's reaction -'Yeh Shaurya kuch bol kyun nahi raha?' literally had me in splits. She's so used to him fighting her battles for her, that she doesn't even have any other weapon in her arsenal except for faking sickness to defer an argument.

And Shaan and Aastha's conversation was also quite engaging. Khalid and Deepa actually have great chemistry as Shaan and Aastha and I don't normally say this for the older couples on any show. I love how Aastha calls Shaan exactly what he is-confused. Although he is a good human being, he's always been too weak to take a stand for what's right. I think with Shaurya, Aastha's realised that he is at least more assertive than his father is, and if anyone can change things in the Sabherwal house and stand up to Devi and Tej, it's him.

Also, I like how conveniently Anokhi side-parted her hair to cover the sindhoor (she looks kinda cute). ACP Ahir's reaction to her new veiled look was priceless as well. Shaurya's conversation with Kanchan was also much needed and I'm happy that someone at least knows about the marriage. I laughed so much when Kanchan was like 'Aap sach mein ladkiyon ke baarein mein kuch nahi jaante' and Shaurya replies with his trademark sarcasm and says -'Thanks. Sirf yahi sunna baaki tha aaj'.

I guess in the upcoming episode we'll see Shaurya helping Babli out and beating Vineet up (just like he wanted to on Valentine's day). I kind of love the way he walked out without saying another word once he heard Anokhi was on her way to Vineet's house (for some reason, I find it a very Damon Salvatore thing to do).

So, despite the reservations I had about the whole marriage track, on the whole I'm far from disappointed with the way things turned out (though I would've still done many things differently, and I guess that's why we have fanfiction). I'm really excited for the upcoming episodes because I see on insta ( like is it getting banned or not?) that college scenes are coming soon and this has always been the lifeblood of the show and what makes it different.

I'm also looking forward to seeing how Shaurya and Anokhi's bond grows and what new things they discover about each other (because there's still so much more each has to uncover about the other) in this phase of their relationship. I'd said in my previous rant that the episodes without Shaurya were underwhelming, but the plot's quite engaging now that he's back and the show is delivering at its full potential once again! Here's hoping it can maintain the same standard of quality throughout its entire run!

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Leaving you guys with a few of my favourite #Shakhi edits from the confession sequence-

Also, in my last rant I forgot to mention how cute #Debvir are, and their insta live was full of nice moments, especially cause they not only spoke about their craft but also interacted with some fans! Them pushing each other out of the frame will always crack me up-

Bye, bye! IDK when I'll rant next!