Chapter dedication: pweetyaffy Thanks for your votes and hilarious comments. They keep me going📌

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♤

“Sometimes, existential dread comes ringing through loud and clear
I'll adjust and simply let go, I guess it is what it is.

I'm not sure of what's coming next, but I'll be alright. As long as I keep breathing, I know I'll be alright. ”
—𝓣𝓱𝓾𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻𝓬𝓪𝓽

♤

"Guys, i—"

"That sick and deranged psychopath! She doesn't deserve to live." Kiki seethes, proceeding to hiss loudly.

"Reason why I didn't support this from the beginning. God!" Jerry cuts in immediately.

"But it—"

"Stop pulling the blame card guys. We can't cry over a spilled milk." Jamal casually replies as he successfully cuts my speech off. I've been trying to speak for over five minutes since this group video call started but then again, they've been doing the talking. Cutting all my sentences short.

"Ara, are you okay?" Jide who has been unusually quiet, finally speaks up and this time, his speech is directed to me. Not expecting any of my friends to give me immediate attention, I shut my eyes firmly, wishing for the hunting images to disappear.

"I...I don't know how I feel honestly." The ride back to the hotel we lodged at was densely quiet as I or Ayo didn't exchange a single word. My throat feels so patched because of lack of water and food but I simply lay beneath my duvet and placed a video call across, to my friends. I guess speaking with them would make me feel much better.

The next silence that follows is so stiffly that I start reasoning maybe the network has cut them off.

"Aramide..." Jide trails off as his face hosts a very heavy expression. "You'll be fine I promise." Since I am underneath a thick duvet, they cannot see my facial expressions as it is stark darkness in here. But thiers, I can see it clearly.

"When are you coming back to Lagos?" Jerry asks softly as he adjusts his head on his pillow. I bite my lips uncertainty at that. Truth is, the decision lies on my brother. Left for me, we're done with this shitty place and I can't wait to return back to Lagos. I really do not see the need to remain in this place.

"Before Christmas eve I guess." I put a random speculation incase AY might have other plans in us being here.

"That won't be bad a—"

"Kiki, where did you keep my skateboard?" Another voice apart from my friends, pipes in as our eyes all divert to Kiki's screen and my eyes almost bulges out as realization sinks in. Tobias strolls to enter her room lazily and his back is facing us. His bare back for that matter! He isn't aware that we are having a video call and he is casually flexing his muscles.

My whole demeanor instantly switches as I feel bothered by this. Thank God my friends cannot see me because it would be embarrassing as hell to see my face that is now a blushing mess.

"Dude! Put on a shirt please." Jamal groans as he rolls his eyes simultaneously. Tobias startled by that, turns and studies Kiki laptop screen as my heartbeat starts to drum in an haywire pattern. His face is up-close to the screen and my inside melts like a puddle. My God this boy is so fine! Seeing his lips again remind me of how I've kissed them before.

Wow I can't believe myself on that.

"It's just you guys here no need to wear a shirt." He replies and uses his finger to poke Kiki's forehead and I can see the way Kiki is trying to hold it in, trying so hard not to snap at her elder brother.

"Um, but Aramide is here." Jerry answers and I glare at the side of his screen wondering why he just ratted me out like that. Tobias face morphs into astonishment but he quickly recovers and replaces it with a smug smile.

"Why is your environment pitch dark?" He asks and out of nowhere, Kiki lets a loud hissing sound and gets up to bring something from the corner of her bed.

"Take your skateboard and usher yourself out of my room now." She states. No she commands him as she literally shoves the skateboard into his arms. He glances at her laptop screen again, then back at his sister.

"But—" He pauses his statement as he gauges the stoic look that is posed on her face. Sighing to himself, he manages to go but before leaving, he shouts loudly saying; "Check your DM Aramide!" And just like that, he is gone. If my cheeks were flaming hot before, it has now caught an unbearable fire as my blushing has reached its climax point.

"Is there something going on that we're not aware of?" Jerry asks with a calculated voice as a smirk starts to morph on his face. I groan and sink my head into my pillow trying to swallow an incoming scream.

"Nothing."

"Nothing!"

I and Kiki reply simultaneously and my face almost curves into a smile. My answer was a snap while hers was calm. I'm glad she really tried to cover up for me this time and I really do hope she won't be angry with me when she discovers I have unexplored feelings for her brother.

"I have no time for all this bullshït to be honest." My eyes dart to Jamal who has a clear unamused expression marring his face. His grey eyes are twinkling under the shimmering lights surrounding his area and I stifle a snicker. How can someone have such beautiful eyes? This life is so unfair because he has a chocolate skin and having silvery-grey is a very very outstanding feature. While I am plain ol' Aramide an ugly duckling.

Agggh!

"You deserve rest Ara. We'll get back to you later when you feel much better yeah?" Jide speaks in a reassuring tone and I nonetheless manage a small smile. I terminate the video call session with a profound appreciation as I am being eager so that I can see the messages Tobais must have left for me in my DM. My hands suddenly become clammy and I reassure myself that it is just a normal message or messages from him that I'm going to see. I won't die of heart attack hopefully.

—
Tobias👉🏽👈🏽:

Hey you too!

Well, I'm sorry and not sorry I had to take advantages of you at a vulnerable state of yours but I couldn't help it.

Btw, I really think you are a great kisser🌚

—

My heart literally pumps out of my chest as I stare at the words once, twice and repeatedly. His choice of words are quite cheesy and I can not help the flutter that undergoes my stomach. I look down at my screen to discover he is online and still typing. Anxiously biting my lips, I read the new messages he sends in.

—

I also do now want to come off as an inconsiderate person. Kiki told me what happened and honestly, you don't deserve that.

I have something special to show you when I get back from this vacation.

Just rest. Text me when you feel much better ❤

—

If his whole message didn't get me, well the love emoji at the end of his text conjures a giggle from my lips. I smack my lips when I realise I'm smiling too much.

What is this mushy behaviour?

I finally shut my phone off since my friends are all insisting, 'take a rest and talk to us when you feel much better.' The duvet I sunk myself into is beginning to make me feel clammy and hot but it feels comfortable the same time. My safe little haven for the meanwhile and I don't wish to come out for the longest of time either. The side of the bed dips minutes later and I instantly know it is my brother.

The sudden possibility of Ayo being my actual blood brother or not, runs through my mind and my heart keeps relying on the former as the actual possibility. Because for one, uncle Makanaki made mention of it on the day of the awful family reunion. But then again, what is uncle Makanaki's involvement in this?

“Sometimes, existential dread
Comes ringing through, loud and clear
I'll adjust and simply let go
I guess it is what it is ”

Ayo's voice sivers into the quiet atmosphere of the room. His voice isn't that bad, but manageable of a scale of 6/10. I sigh, knowing what he is trying to do exactly. When I initially recovered from my coma state earlier this year, Ayo made sure to sing this song composed by the popular Thundercat. He made it our assurance theme song and if either of us raises the first bridge of the song, the other is to complete the second part. I deliberately keep my mouth shut this time. I don't feel the essence of saying the lyrics that won't matter much to me.

“I'm not sure, of what's coming next
But I'll be alright.
As long as I keep breathing, I know I'll be alright.”

He completes the song himself and I can feel as he slowly moves to the side of my bed.

"You didn't sing along." He points out in an almost disappointed tone and I roll my eyes. Well no shit sherlock I think it was pretty obvious I didn't. I hug the duvet tighter over my body incase he has any plans on removing them from me.

"Go away Ayo."

"Yeah sure thing I'll go. I just need to collect..." He trails off and before I can comprehend what is happening, the duvet suddenly comes off me in a swift manner. I blink my eyes repeatedly to adjust to light before I glare at my brother. "...something." He completes with a smug smile. I roll my eyes and readjust myself to a proper lying down position this time.

"I want to rest and you're actually disturbing me Ayo." I mumble with my back faced to him.

"I'll allow you to rest but let's cement our reason of being here once and for all." His statement didn't sit well with me as I quickly roll on my back to face him squarely.

"Do you mean we should go back? Come on Ayo!" I let out a wail.

"No you idiot. I am referring to the talk." He laughs lowly but recovers himself before going back to a solemn look.

"Okay." I reply like a scolded kid as I hug the pillow tighter to myself, assuming a sitting position this time.

"First of all, I want to apologise for putting you in a transfixed position as this. I started the digging of information when you recovered from the coma. And I swore I would let you in once I'm pretty satisfied." He sighs and runs a hand over his forehead. "Well, I can't say this ended obviously in a good note. But I'm satisfied with the little we could dig." He smiles sadly and places a hand on my shoulder.

"It's fine. Now I know why she hated me to the extent of wiping me out of this earth intentionally." My face squeezes unpleasantly at the memory of how she screamed at me back at the asylum. Shaking my head to wag those thoughts away, I proceed to discuss the elephant in the room. "So, who do you think is my real father?"

"Oh about that," AY eyes diverts from mine and it seems he is trying to hide something from me.

"I know. I saw him." I reply with a wave of hand. Ayo seems greatly dumbstruck at my nonchalant answer, trying to gauge my countenance.

"Yo—you mean SMD?"

"Well duh, who else would I be referring to?" The shock is still evident on his face and his eyes narrow at me, staring intensely.

"Wait how did you do know I was going to talk about him? And secondly, how do you know him?" I chuckle a little at his ridiculous question.

"I know you inside-out dear brother. And it is pretty obvious you were going to talk about him. And secondly, I ran into him today. I saw his contact card with his details." I answer primly. And as if a realisation I didn't discover from onset dawns on me, my eyes fly open as wide as saucers. "Ayo..." I trail off, looking at him to ensure he is thinking what I'm thinking.

"Yeah same thing I thought also. I discovered Senator Marshall has been seeing mum for the past couple of months." He replies with a scowl.

So that man has been seeing mum? I thought she said he is a married man? What is he doing, visiting her and trying to bring up buried memories? This dosen't make sense at all.

I adjust my leg in a proper Indian style, ready to analyse this situation further. "If he has been visiting her all these while, perhaps he still loves her? Or he is trying to reach out to his 'children' from her. Sorry child." I quickly correct myself. Not that I want to raise my hopes high, but I can never be too sure if I'm truly his child or the random stranger she had sex with. Well literally, I might be a bastard then.

"Wipe that thought from your head. Fast." He says with a groan.

"Which thought?" I retort back confusedly.

"You're not a bastard and you know it."

"Oh,"

"Yes, oh." He rolls his eyes. "Why are you so nonchalant about this anyways? I mean, seeing Senator SMD today, the whole information fiasco and you know," He flails his hand, trying to buttress his point further. I smile sadly at that, clasping my hands together.

"History has been made already, and I can't change it. I really do not see the need of crying over spilled milk and well, I've decided nothing will ruin the little happiness I have henceforth. When the time is right, all things will fall in place. I have faith, and I believe strongly in that." AY's eye glints with sheer joy at my statement.

"And I prepared a truckload of reassuring speech to heap on you since you're a big crybaby."

He did not just say that..

Grabbing the pillow from my side, I use it to whack him lightly. "I'm not a crybaby!"

"Okay crybaby." He replies smugly. I glare at him, attempting to whack him again. From there, we have a mini pillow war where I attack him and he effortlessly tries to defend himself.

"Come get me you loser!" AY threatens with a smirk and I smile evily at him. He has forgotten I know his weak point and well, too bad for him. Raising the pillow so high as if I am about to hit him, he defends himself by raising his both hands immediately and I quickly divert my attention by ducking and going for his bare feet straight. Tickling them in the process.

"Agggh!" AY manages to get a hold of himself and overthrows me in the process. "You cheated AY! Drop me down this minute." I yell like a little whining kid. I am now over his shoulder, dangling in an upside-down position and him alone, knows how much I'm scared of heights.

"Apologise by saying Ayo is the best big brother in the whole world, and I, Aramide is a crybaby." I scowl and hit his back repeatedly. No way in hell am I saying those words.

"AY! This hotel will soon barnish us for real!" I giggle helplessly trying to manoeuvre my way out.

"Say the words dammit."

"No.

"Aramide!"

"Ayomide!"

"You're too stubborn."

"You too monkey."

"Moronic gi—"

His phone goes off at that exact moment and I am more than elated to be back to the ground as he drops me to answer his phone call. He strides towards the toilet side and gives a sign with his hand, indicating he would be back shortly. My head still feeling fuzzy from being upside-down for a while, and my face flushed from the effect, I sit still willing my vision to become clear again.

Ayo phone call takes longer than it should be and I am getting quite bored. So I crawl slowly towards his laptop at the bed-stand and open it gently. His laptop is a soft touch/fingerprint high model of the HP version. And since I've registered my fingerprint in the system previously, it opens on my own accord and I smile at that.

I touch the screen helplessly, looking for what I can busy my self with when a mail pops in. I clear the notification and continue my search when another one pops in. I'm about to clear it again when I see my name in it and my brows furrow at that.

Private message from _secretary general_ [inbox]

_Secetary general_ sent you a private message.  Read it now>>>

No way in hell am I going to ignore this private message when I am a curious person  to the core. Looking around to incase AY wouldn't come out soon, I quickly click on it to read more.

Dear Ayomide Bola,

This is to inform you your meeting with Senator Marshall Peterson has been successfully secured. He has also requested the person of Aramide should be brought along. No questioning whatsoever and remember no backing down from the deal you made. Have a nice day!

Regards,

What the hell?!

Ayo cannot go behind my back. No I must be seeing double probably right?

I quickly surf to read previous emails and I see he has been making outrageous deals with this certain secretary general and unknown mails also. What has my brother involved himself in? My hands start shaking when I read a mail that dated one week ago and he said we would come to Delta and the person should be rest assured that they can take me for their operation.

Closing the laptop with force, I attempt to get up and confront him when I feel a slight sting on my neck.

"Ouch," I mumble lowly realising a syringe was injected on my neck. Not seeing who did it, I fall down helplessly welcoming the new darkness clouding my vision.

Author's note

What is happening?? Um...even me as the author don't know what's up again :(

Book recommendation: The bridge by  _mothawriter_
The book really inspired me so far and I encourage y'all to see that also.

Q: Can you ever handle betrayal from a friend or sibling?