Silas' stance stiffened.

"It's important to have a family unit that includes a wife of my kind."

He sounded so logical and I wanted to yell at him in frustration. Why did everything he do and say have to be logical? Being in love wasn't logical. If anyone had a choice over love, most, if not all, would avoid it like a plague.

I yanked my wrist from his hold. He released me but I could still feel his touch imprinted on my skin. I was angry and I didn't have it in me to try and hide it anymore.

"And a family unit with me wasn't enough?" I asked fiercely. The need to keep him from getting angry was long gone. I had to see the truth even if it battered my heart. There was no room for hesitation, no room for hope.

I needed the cold hard truth. To stop any hope that he might care for me. I couldn't go on like this, I would rather he tear my heart from my chest now than harbor feelings he would never return.

It made me wonder if being so starved for affection I interpreted small gestures from him into more than they were? Had I made it up all in my head because I had needed it?

"You are the mother of my children," he said, like he didn't understand my issue with him having a vampire wife.

I swallowed. The look in his eyes stopped any further words.

"I thought you died Avery." He paused. "I thought you were dead."

"Why did you go in search for me when you thought I was gone?" I asked. "Why would you search for someone you believed was dead?"

Like Jude has said. He had been chasing a ghost. There had been no evidence I was alive.

"I had to know for sure. I owed it to our sons."

My heart fell from my chest. The part of me that had hoped he would reveal he had searched for me because he cared about me, even loved me.

I don't know why I kept doing this to myself. "But you had a wife lined up why would you need me?"

"Our sons need you." His words went right through me like shards of glass.

I bit my lip trying to reign in my heartache but I was finding it more difficult with each passing moment.

"I want you to understand what you did today and the ramifications." I crossed my arms. "I had a chance to be free. I wasn't someone's slave or soldier. For once since I woke up after being bitten I had a choice."

Our eyes held.

"Today you took that from me." I was so angry. Consequences be damned.

I'd kept things to myself for too long. It was time for him to understand the severity of what was going to unfold. All the things Jude had warned me about.

"Your sons need you," he argued.

I felt guilty. Avery and Archer. At least I wouldn't have to pretend to be a friend.

"Have you told them about me?" I asked softly, feeling another kind of ache in my chest.

"Not yet." His tone pensive. Perhaps he was still digesting my harsh words.

I swallowed. "Can I see them?"

He nodded. "They are asleep right now but you can see them. You need to be prepared. They have grown up a lot. They are far more advanced than human children."

I nodded. I couldn't reveal I had already met them even if it had been weeks ago. All I do was hope my sons didn't remember our brief meeting. I didn't know what I would do if they revealed it.

I took a deep breath as I followed Silas to their room. He opened the door. Two small beds held my sons. With the light from the hallway I could see how much they had grown since I had last seen them. The emotion that caught me straight in the chest at the sight of my sons as the size of six year old boys was too much to handle.

I wiped away a tear. They had grown so much. I feared I would wake them so I slipped out of the room and took a shuddering breath as Silas closed the door behind us.

"What are their names?" I asked, my voice husky. Silas could not find out I knew their names already and I feared slipping up. I wasn't a good liar.

"Archer and...Avery."

I turned to face him. "Avery?" I could finally find out from him why he named our eldest son after me.

He nodded.

"Why?" I asked.

"You are their mother. I wanted them to have a piece of you."

It was sentimental. So unlike the vampires. So unlike him.

"Why? I'm just some fertile Sire that had the gene that meant I could bear Vampire children." Before I would never have dreamed of speaking to him like this. Maybe it was the time I had away from him that had enabled me to find my voice and build the strength to voice it. "You were the one who told me that was my sole purpose. And you told me if it wasn't with you, it would be with Thane."

"You're being very emotional Avery."

He always said that. Every time I told him some harsh truths he would say something like that.

I was tired and the stress of the events that had unfolded had wiped me.

"I'm tired." And emotionally drained.

He nodded. "Your room is ready."

My room. I was back in my place, and I hated it. On one hand I wanted to be with my sons but I would have to live with the constant fear they could be taken away from me.

What happened when Talon went to the vampire council and I was called before then again? I couldn't hide from it but I didn't want to face it right now.

There would be time for it.

I followed Silas to my bedroom.

"I had Ben ready your room."

It was exactly the same as when I had left it. It was beautiful, everything money could buy but it was still a prison. I surveyed the room, fighting the sadness that settled inside me at the thought of watching him with someone else everyday.

This wasn't living.

"So when will I meet your future wife?"

"That is not important right now."

I hated how my heart raced when his eyes met mine and remembered what it felt like to be with him. As close as two people could be. To drink blood directly from him.

Standing with him now, it felt like a lifetime ago.

"So what's important right now? I wouldn't want to disrupt your perfect family unit." It was a petty comment but I was jealous and there was no kidding it or pretending otherwise.

"You are the boys mother. You are important."

And there it was again. I wanted to be important to him.

"I need some blood and sleep."

I also wanted space to sort through my feelings and try to figure out how to pick up the pieces of my life. Danger loomed but the most difficult thing was to stand in front of the man I loved, a man who had fathered my children, and feel like a stranger.

The closeness we had shared before was gone.

"I'll get bring some for you," he said before he left.

I walked over to the window and peered out over the grounds.

He could have gotten Ben to bring the blood. I didn't understand why he felt the need to get it himself.

I crossed my arms around my waist.

When Silas retuned he handed me the blood. "Thank you."

"It's good to have you back."

I frowned. "It sounded like you had everything nice and neatly organized."

He pressed his lips together.

"Why would you go to such lengths to chase a ghost Silas?" I studied him, trying to see what he wasn't saying. "Would the boys miss a mother they had never met? Surely your future wife would be better suited to be a mother to them. She would be better suited for you."

He remained silent.

"I could have had a life. Do you get that? I could have maybe found someone who could love me? And maybe, just maybe, I could have been happy."

I let out a shaky breath. "You took all of those possibilities from me."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. His eyes intense as they held mine.

"Why couldn't you just let me go?" My hand shook so put the glass of blood down. "I can't have anymore children so why would you need me?"

He frowned. "How do you know that?