I curled up as much as the restraints would let me.

Ana walked into the room. Blood still stained her clothes.

She looked terrified.

Mother was standing behind her. Ana turned to her. "What happened?"

I saw she was eyeing my restraints.

I looked down. "I won't hurt you. I promise."

She walked towards me and placed a hand on mine. Her hands were freezing. "I know. I just want to know what happened."

"Rafael happened," I mumbled.

She turned to my mother. "Could we get someone to take these off?" She looked back at my restraints.

Mother sighed. "I don't know if that's a good idea." She looked at me. "It's not that I don't trust you, I don't trust Rafael and he won't hesitate to mess with you."

I pulled Ana towards me. I could only wrap one arm around her. I frowned. "I can't hold her. If I can I won't let go."

She looked between us. "I'll go ask."

Ana moved my hand away and sat beside me on the bed. "How do you feel?"

I smiled at her. "Perfect now that you're here."

She frowned. "That's not a real answer."

I sighed. "I'm fine. Apparently, I'm basically sterile and I found that out though Rafael so you know how that went, but it's fine."

She stayed silent as a nurse came in and undid the restraints.

I pulled her close to me.

She watched as Mother followed the nurse out of the room. "You don't sound fine."

I ran my fingers through her hair. "I don't know." I sighed. "It wasn't exactly easy news to hear and the way he told me like it was just another thing he had and I didn't."

She grabbed one of my hands. "You never struck me as the type of person who wanted to be a mother."

"I still wanted the choice." I pulled her hand to my face.

"That makes sense." She paused. "It's going to be okay."

I looked at the ceiling. "Do you want kids?"

She shrugged. "I love you."

"That's not what I asked." I looked down at her.

She smiled. "I do want kids, I've wanted them since I was three, but I think I just discovered that I don't want anything more than you."

I ran my fingers along her spine. "So we have them."

She cuddled closer to me. "Unless we can't or if you don't want them."

I smiled at her. She really had no idea how much I loved her.

I would do anything for her. My everything revolved around her.

She adjusted herself and accidentally ran her hand over my stitches. She almost jumped away. "I'm sorry! Did that hurt?"

I pulled her back down and held her like she was before. I grabbed her hand and placed it lightly on my stomach where the stitches were. It was a little tender but I knew she would be upset with herself if she hurt me and her being upset was much more painful.

I smiled at her. "A lot is going on right now, and do you know one thing I really don't need?"

"Me?" She tried to move her hand but I held it.

I almost laughed. "You're close, but also very wrong. I need you more than anything, but I also really need you not to be worried."

She frowned. "I don't know if I can do that."

She laid down and tucked her head under my chin. I pulled the blanket over her. "Ana, I love you, but I am not weak in the slightest."

"Unlike me." She mumbled.

I sighed. "You're not weak, you're vulnerable."

She sniffled. "Whatever you say, but at the end of the day I'm the one who I had to call my girlfriend for help in my own house and you're the one who got shot and still had me as a priority."

I tightened my grip on her. "Ana, we're not the same person, at all. You're a normal 17-year-old girl. Sure, I got shot and still looked for you, but I had killed someone maybe twenty minutes before. I am not a good person, you are. That doesn't make you weak."

"I still look weak compared to you." She buried her face in my neck.

"And I look heartless. If you want to see it that way you can, but it's simply not true."

She groaned. "I hate it when you're right about those things."

I kissed the top of her head. "When will you realize that you're perfect?"

She giggled. "You should get some sleep."

"Do you want me to sleep or do you want to sleep?"

"I want you to sleep." She mumbled.

I turned onto my side so I could see her face. She smiled at me.

I pressed my forehead against hers. She brushed the hair out of my face. "Sometimes I forget how beautiful you are."

I laughed. "I'm sure I look amazing right now in the hospital lighting after I got shot."

She pressed a light kiss to my cheek. "The sun is perfectly hitting your face. You look like an angel."

"I'm not." I hummed.

"Then I'm not a goddess." She stroked my cheek.

"I'm not so sure about that," I mumbled.

...

It was a little creepy, but I loved to watch Rosa sleep.

Mostly because she talked when she had dreams and she didn't hide her emotions.

It was usually just mumbling of facial expressions but sometimes there was an occasional sentence.

I didn't get to see it in person much, but we FaceTimed each other every night and she usually fell asleep before me.

She had been asleep for about an hour and a half.

I smiled as she shook her head slightly. "No... no fish..." She whispered.

I'd have to ask her about it later. Maybe she didn't like fish.

Then something strange happened. Her facial expression changed to something I hadn't seen before.

She moved closer to me. "Leave... please... leave her..."

"Rosa," I whispered. I placed my hand on her cheek.

Her eyes snapped open. "Hmm? What?"

"Are you okay?"

The expression vanished. "Perfect, why?"

If she wasn't going to tell me, I'd say it for her.

"You had a nightmare."

"No, I didn't." She responded too quickly.

"Hey." I ran my fingers along her cheekbones. "It's okay."

She shook her head. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Rosa." I sighed. "I don't know what you're afraid of, but I can promise you that I'm not going to judge or hurt you. You don't even have to talk about it, I just don't want you to lie to me."

She looked down. "Sorry."

"It's fine." I kissed her forehead. "So, no fish?"

"What?" She looked up at me.

"You said no fish." I smiled.

"Okay, I genuinely don't remember that." She laughed. "Wait... how much do I talk?"

"A bit." I shrugged.

...
I'm tired but I'm not tired.

I love that almost all of my chaps end with me saying I'm tired or in pain.

My arm hurts from when I got blood drawn today but that's about it for pain.

<3