16.

I barely sleep that night. Elias fills my mind, the thought of him being merely a hall away nearly torturous. After months of wondering whether he was even alive, it takes everything in me not to seek him out and make up for lost time. Because the part deep inside of me that yearned for him has only grown stronger. I had so much to say to him—the words I whispered as I flicked through his sketchbooks, the conversations I fantasised curled up in the library by the fire, the dreams of our last words, last touch, last look. Everything happened so fast—from finding out Elias was a wisper to finding out I lived a life meant for him—there was so much left unspoken between us.

But now, when he's only a room away, I can't seem to bring myself to move. Elias didn't come out of his room after the healer forced me out, neither did the healer. They both stayed in that small room with the sheet pulled across. It doesn't take a genius to know that Elias is punishing himself for what happened.

I roll over on the bed to stare at Cassia's side of the room. She's not there. When I look at her belongings, my chest tightens. I thought I'd forgiven her for what she did to us. But now that Elias is back, the flame reignites. His suffering could've been prevented if it weren't for what she did.

I sigh and stare at the roof. There's something about being in the cave that reminds me of the tunnels I grew up in. The lack of natural light, the narrows halls and small rooms. But this place is warmer than the tunnels ever were, and much less barren.

I don't know how many hours pass before someone pokes their head through the doorway. I sit up so fast my head spins, my gaze meeting a pair of amber eyes. "Elias?"

He moves into the room. He looks stronger than the last time I saw him, less frail. "Can I come in?"

"Of course." I scramble on the bed to make room for him, hugging the sheet closer to cover my bare legs, self-conscious of all the scratches littering them. It's a stupid thought.

He comes closer and sits on the edge of the bed, so far away I wouldn't even be able to touch him if I reached out. The air between us feels cold.

"How... how do you feel?" I ask.

He stares at the ground, the left side of his mouth tilting up in a nearly-there smile. "Better."

I fiddle with the edge of the sheet. "I'm sorry about what happened before. I—"

"That wasn't your fault."

"It wasn't yours either, you know," I say quietly. He doesn't respond. Ever since I met him, Elias has carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. Things beyond his control somehow become his fault in his eyes.

"Everyone at home will be so excited to see you," I say, not knowing how else to fill the silence. "I don't know how much they've told you, but Eric left Aliyah in charge, and even though I think she'd do a great job, Harrison was so angry because he doesn't think—" Elias smiles. "What?"

He looks up. "You called it home."

"What?"

"My village." He shifts slightly so we're facing one another on the bed. "You called it home."

The smile that tugs at my lips is unstoppable. "I guess... I guess it is home now."

"They're not treating you too horribly?" he asks. I shake my head. "Even Harrison?"

"I think I can handle Harrison," I say.

He laughs. "Some people will never change."

It feels stupid to be talking about me having a horrible time when Elias was the one being tortured these past three months, but I can't be the one to bring it up, so I blurt something stupid instead. "I learnt to read while you were gone."

A small, peaceful smile crosses his face. "You know the difference between the d's and b's yet?"

"Of course," I say, embarrassed.

"You said you always confused them," he reminds me. "Maybe when we get back I can show you some of my favourite books, now that you can read them."

"I'm not that good yet. Bastian was helping me, mostly making fun of me, but helping a little." I flush, suddenly realising how silly it feels to be talking about something as simple as my reading ability. "Sorry, I know it's probably annoying that I'm talking about how hard the past few months were for me when you—"

"Milena." The intensity in his gaze shuts me up more than his words. "I've woken up every day for the past three months thinking you were dead. Knowing you were alive and happy is more than I could ever hope to hear."

I stare at him with wide eyes. Somehow, we've shifted closer, knees nearly pressing together. "I'm okay," I murmur quietly, "but nothing is the same; nobody is really happy. Not without you there."

"Except for maybe Harrison," he jokes.

I let out a breath of air. "Some people never change, right?"

"Right."

His eyes hold mine. His energy pulses through me, and it feels so good because yesterday I didn't feel anything. Three months of not seeing each other and it feels like just an hour ago we were in the library looking at his sketches. I'd been so afraid of what the past few months would've done to him. And when we rescued him from that island and he didn't recognise me, my worst fears were coming to life. But despite what happened to him and how it may have shaped him, the way he looks at me remains the same. It doesn't burn like it used to, it doesn't feel as electric—it just feels like coming home.

His skin begins to vibrate, and as soon as Elias notices, his smile drops away and he shuffles back.

"I... I came here because I needed to say something," he says, standing up. "I shouldn't have gotten so distracted."

I watch as he paces, anxiety swirling in my stomach.

"I care about you, Milena, a lot. But nothing has changed from the last time we spoke. In fact, things are even more dangerous now. We have to be... careful around each other."

I nod, my heart sinking. "I know, I'm sorry. I just missed you."

"I missed you too." He looks pained. "But we're both alive and okay, that's all than I can dream of. I'd like to keep it that way. If anything ever happened to you because of me..." he shakes his head, ridding himself of the thought. "I just... I'm glad we can be friends."

Friends. It isn't a statement, it's a question. And the true meaning of his words are just beneath the surface. He's the only wisper left, and if wispers can only be with wispers, he's condemning himself to a life of being alone forever. But it doesn't matter. A few months ago, I couldn't see past myself. I liked Elias to much I didn't care about the consequences, because for the first time in my life, I had someone who felt like home. But things have changed. I know what it's like not to have him, and having him as a friend is better than not having him at all.

So I nod. "Friends," I say. "Yeah, me too."

~

I sleep restlessly after Elias leaves, tormented by the conclusion to our discussion. I know that's the only way it can be, and yet, it still hurts. Elias is a wisper and I'm a human. We can never be together; our kinds were never meant to be together. But deep emotions don't disappear overnight, no matter how much I try to wish them away.

Malik appears in the doorway a few moments after I wake up, a bright smile on his face. "Good morning," he says. He looks much better this morning, freshly shaved with clean clothes and wet hair. "Breakfast?"

Nerves pules through me as I think of the day ahead. I pull a sweater over my head and meet him in the doorway. "Sleep well?" Malik asks, looking over his shoulder. "I know those beds are something to get used to."

My hipbones dug into the rock hard mattress every time I turned, but there was a familiarity to it that was comforting. "They weren't so bad."

He smiles as we round the corner. The cave widens into a room, stones arched to the floor to create pillars that separate sections of tables. I scan the room. Like before, it's mostly empty aside from the group seated at the table—Eric, Cassia and Elias. They sit hunched together, radiating exclusivity. I hold my breath as I stare. Elias' frame is so much bigger than both of theirs, but Eric now dwarfs him in muscle.

"Fuit?"

I look to Malik. "Huh?"

He stands beside me holding a tray and gesturing to the wooden bench piled with different coloured fruits. "Take your pick."

I pick up a red one and turn it over in my hand, marvelling at the ragged edges. "I've never seen any of these before."

"They're only grown locally, it's my favourite thing about this place." He picks up the same as me and smiles. "I do pity you, Milena. Don't tell them I said so, but that mountain food is subpar."

I laugh, looking over at the table. Elias is staring at us, mouth in a straight line. When our eyes meet, he looks back at Cassia and stirs his spoon around the bowl.

"Come on." Malik nudges me and walks over to the table, unbothered by the energy radiating from them. I grab another piece of fruit and a bread roll and join him, sitting next to Eric and opposite Elias.

Malik reaches a hand across the table. "Elias, it's good to see you again."

Elias simply takes Malik's hand, but he doesn't say anything. "Have you seen the elders yet? They wanted to speak with you again."

"I went this morning," Elias says.

"Good."

I look to Eric, but he's too preoccupied pulling apart his fruit. "We have to decide what we're going to do with the hollower," Cassia says. "Maybe after breakfast you can take us to her, Malik?"

"It might have to wait a bit," he says. "I have to bring the fishing nets in before the tide goes out."

"Eric said you were looking for the shadow," Elias says, interrupting their conversation.

"I was." Malik pauses, looking up. "The hollowers had it. They didn't even know."

"And?"

A small smile crosses his face. "I got it."

Silence falls over us. Eric's frown only deepens, still skeptical. "Where is it?" Elias asks.

"The elders are keeping it safe, deep in the cave until we're ready to use it."

"Take me to it."

Eric frowns. "Elias, you're not supposed to go—"

"Malik, show me where it is."

Malik nods, slightly reluctant. "Okay. I'll take you."

And despite Eric's scowl and Cassia's doubtful eyes, when Malik stands up, we all follow, our breakfast's abandoned.

~

Malik leads us deeper into the cave, in a different direction to where we met with the elders. It's colder down here, and behind Elias, I can barely see past his shoulder. We come to a room and Malik lets us in. In the middle of the room, there's the small dagger he'd showed me on the beach, encased in glass. I watch as Elias moves towards it, movements slow. We all stare at it. Again, I'm struck by how small and inconspicuous it is.

"This is it?" Cassia murmurs sceptically. "This dagger?"

Malik nods, eyes dancing. "Once activated, and one stab would bring immense suffering."

I shudder.

"You think it can stop them? That it can reverse the effects of immortalia sacrificium?" Elias asks.

"I know it can."

"So why wait? We should be out there now using it on the hollowers, not wasting our time here."

Cassia leans across the table. "How can we even know that it works, Elias? Or that it isn't just a random weapon? Eric's right, we can't just—"

"The hollowers were looking for it, too," Elias says. "They thought it was in the mountains, where Ana lived."

Eric pauses, body still. Malik leans forward, intrigued. "They were?"

"I'd hear them speak of it sometimes. They believed it could be their end and they wanted to destroy it," he says. "We have to go."

"Elias, calm down," Eric says. "We just got you back. You have to give yourself time to heal—"

"If we wait too long none of that will matter." Elias looks around at each of us. "The hollowers aren't stupid. They're calculated and sneaky, and that woman, Cynthia, she's the worst of them all. She has a plan to take us out. And with an army of immortal hollowers, she might be able to."

"But we've got you now, Elias," Cassia says quietly. "She can't make anymore hollowers immortal without your blood."

"How long was I gone?"

"Three months."

"Three months. They drained me of blood for three months, never fully letting me die. She has a lot of it, enough to create an army." His words sink in, rendering the rest of us silent. Nobody wants to think about what the past three months were like for Elias, how much he remembers, but it stares us right in the face. "Cynthia talked about two main things while I was there—the sacrifice and the shadow. She has a plan. Right now, only a small amount of hollowers have been given the serum. She wants to take down the shifters and if she has enough time, she might get away with it. The shadow will be no use to us if there are too many of them and she has a chance to get the serum out."

Silence settles around us. I stare at the room, thinking it over in my head. Cynthia was never a pleasant person to be around, but he's right, she wasn't stupid. And when I faced her, defenceless, with Elias slung over my shoulder, she missed me.

"Elias is right." Everyone looks at me, but Elias' stare is the only one that matters. "She could've killed me."

"What?"

"Cynthia almost caught me. I was trying to carry Elias from that room and she walked in. We fought, but I... I had to surrender. I was defenceless. And at her mercy, and she missed." I shake my head. "I grew up with her. She was one of our best hunters. She never missed."

I meet Elias' gaze. Physically, he's different—slimmer, paler, frailer. But those amber eyes are unchanging. "What're you saying, Milena?" Cassia presses.

"Cynthia has wanted to kill me for months and she knew we would come for Elias. She knew I would come. She had the opportunity to kill me and she stalled. It was too easy, almost like she didn't want me to die." I swallow. "She has a plan and we might've played right into it."

My words sink into the silence, the weight of them like a sledge hammer.

"We have to talk to the hollower," Malik says. "The one we stumbled across. She might know something."

"What would she know?" Cassia asks.

"She told Milena where they were and led us in the right direction. She was compliant. Almost too compliant."

"You didn't complain before."

"It wasn't really anyone's main concern," Eric snaps, for once agreeing with Malik. "If she really led us there on purpose, there must be a reason why."

We sit in a tense silence. Her reasoning for helping me never made any sense, but I was naive and, in the moment, didn't really care to question it.

"You sound crazy," Cassia says. "You think they'd just... let us go? They're hollowers."

"They're smart," I say. "And they don't do anything without a reason." I turn to look at Malik. "You said you know how to activate the shadow."

"Only Elias can," he murmurs. "But it's risky right now."

"But Elias is right," I say, "the longer we spend sitting around here the longer we give Cynthia to create an army."

Malik shakes his head. "There's no point leaving until the shadow is activated—"

"Then activate it!" Eric snaps.

"With his powers so sensitive, he could very easily destroy it trying. That's not a risk I'm willing to take." He looks around at each of us. "Without the shadow, we have nothing."

"So what do we do, then?" I ask.

"We have to talk to the elders," Eric murmurs, looking to Mailk. "Can we meet with them after this?"

"I have to do the nets—"

"I can do that," Elias says. "You and Eric go talk to the elders. Cassia, you guard the hollower until we have time to talk to her."

We all stare around the room at each other, trying to think it through.

"I did not expect to find you all down here."

I jump on the spot, cheeks flushing as I twist around. Elias is staring at me, but the others are facing the woman who appeared in the doorway. She has greying hair and yellow teeth, her frail hand reaching out to brush Malik's shoulder. It's the elder who sat in the golden chair last night, the one who didn't speak.

"Elder Rosemary," Malik says, standing to greet her. "They requested to see the shadow for themselves."

She turns her head slightly in recognition of his words before shifting her attention to us, resting on Elias. "It is good to see you are well, child."

He simply tilts his head in acknowledgement, watching her carefully as she gazes past Eric and Cassia till she looks at me. Her eyes are a deep blue—a shade deeper than Malik's—and despite her frail appearance, there's strength in her smile. I can't help but see Ana when I look at her.

"Milena." She says my name like a song. "We have not had the chance to speak. Why not meet me in my quarters after you have finished here."

"Me?"

She nods. "Malik will show you the way, won't you?"

"Of course."

"Perfect." She leaves no room for discussion or decline. "I shall see you then."

Swiftly, she turns and exits the room, so gracefully it's as if she's walking on air. I swallow. "Why does she want to talk to me?"

"You're of great interest to the elders. You grew up with the enemy. Don't be nervous," Malik tells me, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Elder Rosemary is very gentle."

I look across at the others. Elias and Cassia both stare after Elder Rosemary, but Eric glares at Malik's hand on my shoulder. Malik raises to his feet. "Shall we?"

I stand up, swallowing the nerves in my throat. "I'll go," Elias interrupts. "I remember the way."

Malik frowns. "You volunteered to get the nets—"

"You and Eric stay here, get the shadow ready, I want to activate it," Elias says. "Cassia—"

"I'll guard the hollower," she says.

Elias nods. "I'll take Milena to see Elder Rosemary and then I'll get the nets, okay?"

Eric frowns. "Elias, you have to take it slow—"

"Don't be long." He steps around Malik and the knife till he's in front of me, peering down. "Ready?"

I nod eagerly and step after him, not bothering to glance behind as Elias strides out of the room.

~

DISCUSSION:

1. Do you think it's worth activating the shadow right now, when Elias could very easily destroy it by accident?

2. What do you think Elder Rosemary will say to Milena?

3. What do you think might happen next?