*TRIGGER WARNING*
Self harm
Toxic relationship

When you love so completely
You can't see what they do
And when you try to,
They just promise to love you.

When you love so completely
You'll believe everything
And you'll ignore everything.
You'll ignore yourself
You'll ignore your friends
Your family
Everyone except that one person
Because no
They'd never hurt you

So you fight and you cry
And you bleed
And they yell.
Because it's your fault
You should know better
You should be better.
You should listen
You shouldn't do that.

But you know it's wrong so you agree
And you stay
For the fights and tears and the blood.
It's all a cycle that can't end
But you love them so you dont want it to.

People will try to open your eyes
So you'll cut those out of your life
Because the one you love told you to.
You'll regret it but you'll keep cutting until you have no one left but yourself to do it to.
Which starts the cycle of fighting and crying and bleeding and yelling.
But the yelling causes more bleeding and the bleeding causes more yelling so you don't mention it any more.

And you tiptoe,
Afraid of everything
Afraid of life itself
But not even realizing it.

People tell you that you've changed, but you disagree
Because hey, you're happy
But you're not because for some reason they don't let you be.
They try and you tell them they do, but something is off, something is very very off, but you can't put your finger on it.

When you love so completely,
You're consumed
But it shouldn't be so consuming.
Not so young
Not so innocent.
But all of the books tell you about this hot fiery love that you want too
So you fight for it, but the one you found isn't good.

In books, those relationships aren't bad, so they don't break up, and you don't want to either.
It's mentioned that you should talk less
But how do you do that?
You're in love
You're both so in love.
So you talk 24 hours a day and feel guilty for sleeping and feel guilty for having plans.
So you don't make plans.
They consume another aspect of your life.

You tell them about your hobbies
But they dont like that
"Have you tried This?
I'd prefer this
This would be better
What about this instead?"
So you listen and you ignore what you want because that's what this relationship is.
Because you don't matter
Only they do
But they try to tell you differently.
However, it's not what is said,
It's how it makes you feel
And even if they're denying it
You know how you felt twenty seconds before
And they don't
But it doesn't matter.

Just when you thought things were looking up,
Something else happens
And it ruins everything
But maybe they planned it.
Maybe it was all a lie.
So you confront
And they deny.
And they put the blame on you
Until you believe it.
And eventually you do.

So the cycle starts over.
Again And again and again.
You fight
You cry
You bleed
They yell
You bleed
They yell
You bleed
They yell
You bleed
They yell
You bleed more
And they yell more
So you hide.
But honey don't try to run.
Because you'll come back.
Because you're so completely in love.
And no one can show you differently.