"Apparently, there were a lot of things you weren't aware about. You didn't even think about the fact that maybe... Peter was feeling the same."

[WORD COUNT: 1620!]

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

'a happy soul is the best shield in a cruel world'
— atticus

You stretched out with a yawn as your heart bounced with every step down the stairs. The living room was cold, as the heating had been off all morning and the cold wooden flooring stung your feet at you reached the end of the stairs and trailed off into the kitchen. A strong scent of vanilla filled your nose from the lightly scented candles you had lit last night and thankfully remembered to blow them out for once, so now the after fragrance was still floating around the room.

You slipped a glass out from above the sink and began pouring yourself some water when there was a knock at your door. For a moment you thought maybe it was Peter walking around upstairs, but then the same patterned knock came again. Who would be on your doorstep in school hours?

You pulled some leggings from the radiators and slipped them over your legs before making sure your hair wasn't too messy and opened the door.

"There you are! I've been worried sick" Your brother Ned almost yelled at you from the doorstep. Well shit.

"Ned you know I would be at school if there wasn't something wrong with me, plus why aren't you in school? Don't tell me you left just to come looking for me, I know you're not that sentimental." you cocked your brow, leaning against the door frame and folding your arms under one another.

"Whatever, look can I come in for a second? I basically ran here and I need a drink" Ned took a step forward lightly, but your hand came up to stop him.

"Uh, yeah, no" you swallowed, feeling the heat rising to your cheeks. Despite being good at a lot of things, lying wasn't one of your adopted skills.

"What you got someone here that I don't know about?" Ned sent a playful wink, making your heart jump. Yeah Ned actually, I do. It's Peter. I'm giving him sexual lessons because he's a virgin and like super nervous around girls, happy now?

"Well, n-no but if I do have a bug or something I don't want you to catch it" Nice one, Y/N, played that so cool.

"Bullshit, I'd be the first one you'd hand it down to" He gave you an eye roll before moving in past you. You clenched your jaw, eyes widening as you were sent into immediate panic mode. You ran past Ned, claiming you needed to use the bathroom before shooting up the stairs and into your bedroom. Peter was just leaving the doorway when he was hit by your soft hands on his chest, pushing him back into the shadowy room and covering his mouth.

Peter scrunched his brows, giving you a confused look before gently removing your hand.

"Everything okay?"

"Ned's downstairs! If he finds out you're here, we're both dead meat!" You quietly exclaimed, your head spinning to the door and back to Peter.

"Shit"

"Exactly. We have to get him out of here, but I don't have an excuse" you moved your hands away from Peter, falling down to your own side as you paced around the room. Peter bit the inside of his lip, conjecturing on the thought himself. There wasn't a good enough excuse to get him out of here, not without something looking dodgy. "He already thinks I have a guy here"

"That's it"

"What?"

"Tell him you have someone over like just make up some random guys name and tell him you want some privacy"

"Peter, if I tell him that I'm gonna have to follow up that story for the rest of my life! You know what he's like!" You began to panic, hearing your name being called from downstairs.

"Fine, I'll go," Peter said, barging past you and out of the door. Your eyes widened before you ran after him, gripping his arm and continuously repeating the words 'no', but he was too strong for you to pull him back. Before long you were both downstairs heading for the living room.

"Hey Y/N where'd you get this candl- Oh, hey Peter" Ned sent a cheery smile, however, faltered to a confused look as he saw you standing behind him, clinging to his arm in an attempt to pull him away. "Did I interrupt something?"

"No"

"Kinda" You overlapped each other, mentally facepalming.

"Then what's going on?" Ned asked, getting a little defensive. You could practically see his mind ticking away, conjecturing that fact that there may be something dodgy going on between you and Peter. As a matter of fact, you both knew there was, but Ned didn't need to know that.

"Uh, Y/N called me this morning and said she wasn't feeling too great so I stopped by" Peter rushed out, the heat rising quicker to your cheeks as you prayed to the lords he'd buy it.

"Okay... But why didn't you just call me?"

"Because you are my brother, why wouldn't I call you and not Peter?"

"Okay fair enough, you sure your okay though?"

You nodded, loosening your grip to the point where your hand slipped comfortably away from Peter's arm and fell back down to the level of your hip. "And if you don't mind, me and Peter would kinda like some privacy. You know, we were kinda talking about some stuff" you lied.

"Oh, um. Okay" Your brother nodded, looking around the room anxiously before backing up towards the door, "I'll uh, see you at school then?"

"Yeah" you replied in sync, watching as Ned quietly left. Upon hearing the door close, you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding and flopped down on the couch.

"That was too close" you sighed, running your palm down your face and through your hair. "Yeah" Peter replied, feeling the couch sink next to you as he sat.

"So uh... About earlier..." Peter began, his hands kneading together. This wasn't something he wanted to bring up, as it was honestly embarrassing at the fact he had taken somewhat the advantage of you.

"What about it?" You asked, sitting back up on the couch to be at shoulder level with him. He was avoiding eye contact, which often meant he was nervous about something. There were two things you remembered about earlier: the lesson and the kiss. You weren't sure which one he was talking about, but you knew which one you wanted to avoid.

"Did I do something wrong? Like, I know that this," he gestured between the two of you as he shifted in his seat lightly, "is a 'no strings attached' thing but... I don't know, did I go too far?" he looked up at you with those chocolate eyes, so innocent and sweet.

"Peter," you sighed, closing your eyes for a moment before opening them. You brought his hands towards you, folding your palms together to gain his full attention, "You did absolutely nothing wrong. If something like this happens it's on my behalf so please don't put it on yourself. You didn't go too far, I guess I just wasn't expecting it. I know we have done a lot more than just kiss, but even though I was the one who made this whole deal I guess it just felt like things were going where they shouldn't be"

"I understand that. But, don't you think you're more than just a friend to me now? I mean, after this is over can we really go back to just being lab partners or study buddies?" he gave a weak smile, tilting your head to face him. He stole the dominance in the conversation with a strong point. You'd really fucked this friendship over.

"But that's what you don't understand about me. I... I know this sounds selfish, but I don't want to see you like that. I just want you to be my shoulder to cry on if I can be yours. I want to remain your friend because if something happens I cannot lose you"

Peter's face loosened a little, like a five-year-old who had been told their pet fish had died. His brows sank a little and his small smile faded.

"God I'm such a fucking idiot" you groaned, pulling your hands from his grip and standing up to walk away from the conversation. But his firm hand pulled you back.

"Peter, don't-" your voice was muffled away as Peter's lips met with your own. It wasn't deep, and neither of you pushed it to be. It was quiet, and slow, and peaceful. It was everything a kiss should be. He pulled away softly, looking down into your eyes.

"You're not an idiot, Y/N. If this is too much we can stop because I'm totally fine with that. I'll follow whatever path you choose and I know how you feel. I'm here for you, as a friend, and nothing more" he smiled, hand resting on your cheek.

You swallowed, a small smile appearing on your lips.

"Thank you, Pete."

Whether or not you wanted to hear those words, they stung. You somewhat wanted Peter to chase after you like he did Chloe. Keel over at your every word. But then again, you wanted him as a friend, and not just because he wanted to get in your pants. You wanted him to see you as the human being you were, and if that meant staying friends. You'd risk it.

"And FYI, you're never gonna lose me"

Don't speak too soon, Parker.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.