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10. Crack is Wack

"I'm still on the hunt for that high. If not drugs, anything to get my mind away from the world." Keily Stone-Morris

Her world was turned upside down.

She lost her big sister. It was weird to even say that.

"Babe, I'm here whenever you need to talk about it." Her husband, Turner, of three years, was at her side as she looked over photo albums of herself and her sisters and brothers growing up.

Tears would not fall. What would crying do? Bring her back.

"Babe, just talk to me, say something."

No words either. How could she explain she had a rocky relationship with her sister from the start? With all her siblings. She was the black sheep in the family, or in other words, the white sheep. Because it was assumed her father was white, she grew up with certain privileges her siblings did not have.

Their neighborhood was predominately Black, by predominately she meant her mother was only one of two white women in the housing projects where they lived. The other married to a Black man, while her mother had men in and out of their lives from all across town. It was nothing to see her mother having sex in the living room while they were all in the kitchen fending for themselves. Or having to hear the sounds of sex with multiple men all night long.

Probably why she had her first sexual experience so young at sixteen. Probably why she went on to make porn videos at eighteen. Was no shock she was pregnant with her first child at twenty, and her second shortly after at twenty-two. At least those kids were doing well, no thanks to her.

Sometime in her mid-twenties, the drugs took over to dull the pain of the fucked up life she felt trapped in. In and out of rehab, her two kids were taken from her. It took her years to get her life back in order, and by the time she did, she was still not fit to be a mother.

Porn movies were still her life. She enjoyed sex, so why not get paid to do it? That's where she met her husband, one of her hot, young film stars. It was a MILF movie. She was forty, and he was thirty but looked and played the part of a twenty-one-year-old. They bonded on set in what was her two hundredth film.

She had been in the business for over twenty years at that point. Some years she filmed nothing, and other years back-to-back movies, about twenty a year. In all, her catalog was expansive. In her early years, she was the go-to for the "underage" looking girl, even though she was of legal age. The pay was better the more dicks she could take, so she prided herself on the more the better.

Anal paid more than vaginal intercourse, so she was always down for that. Girl-on-girl did not pay as well, but she would do a couple just to diversify. She was in high demand, and at one point was out in Los Angeles thinking she could be a real actor, but no parts ever came, the addiction got worse, so she came back home in more attempts to sober up.

"If you don't want to talk to me, want to talk to your sponsor?"

Five years clean but every day was a struggle for her. Her drug of choice was cocaine in its various forms. A few pills here or there and of course marijuana. It was all depending on her mood.

Now she was a hundred percent clean of all drugs and alcohol.

"Tamra never hurt anyone."

"Your sister had a lot of...demons," Turner said holding her hands, but she snatched them away.

"She was no angel, but she was not a bad person. All she wanted was love. She loved her children, she was a better mother than me, and..." She sniffled, rubbing a hand across her nose to stop the snot drip. "She even helped raise Kelsey and Rolf when I couldn't...or wouldn't, or didn't care. I owe my sister that must respect."

"I thought your mother took your kids in?"

"Yes, but Tamra was there, mostly living there as well with her children in and out, between shacking up with guys."

Every time her sister thought she found the one, she would move in with the guy, along with all her kids, and when that did not turn out, the man would put her and the kids out and she would go running back to her mother's.

It still was more stable than she offered her offspring.

She wondered if someone let them know their aunt was murdered. Neither Kelsey nor Rolf hung around after they finished high school, and even when she tried to build a relationship with them, they barely said much to her.

She looked down at her phone in her hand, a picture of her babies when they were young the screensaver.

"Maybe you need some rest and lay down. The police will figure out what happened and catch the guy she was seeing."

Her hand involuntarily started to shake. She looked up at her husband. "I never told you she was seeing someone. I just found out yesterday from my mother...and I didn't tell you."

Turner shrugged. "She has a new guy every time you turn your head. Come on, let me put you to bed.

She could agree to that. She took a quick shower, wrapped herself in a towel, and then headed to her bedroom. Turner handed her a glass of water, and she readily finished off.

"I think I need to call Risé. Make sure she is handling this well with no setbacks either." They both were clean the last few years. Risé hit rock bottom and lived in the streets for many years. She could not imagine the horror her baby sister had gone through.

"You look tired. Maybe sleep and call Risé later."

She reached for her phone on the nightstand before she felt suddenly more tired than she ever felt in her life. Maybe her husband was right, she was tired, and a nap would have her all rested so she could deal with her family again.

She floated off thinking of Tamra, seeing her always smiling and laughing, full of energy, and talking about her kids all the time.

Whoever did this to her better count their days.

"I don't need drugs. I don't need anyone." Rise' Stone

"I just need one more hit."

Drugs were not her addiction anymore. She replaced that high with the high of sex with strangers. Any time, every time. Basically, any guy she would see, she wanted to have sex with them.

Her mail delivery guy, every day at noon.

Her coffee barista confined in the ladies' restroom.

Her next-door neighbor Mr. Miller, who was older than her mother.

Her other neighbor, Derek, even though he had a longtime girlfriend.

Her boss at her job at Denny's, yes, you guessed it, in the bathroom stall.

Any guy that she fancied, she did not discriminate, all they needed was a dick that worked.

It was not hurting anybody. That is until she landed on the wrong dick.

"Your sister is in the other room."

She giggled. "If you keep quiet, I will keep quiet."

Her sister's husband. It was not her fault he was hung like a bull, thick, veiny dick was her favorite. They had only been messing around a few weeks now.

She sucked him off once when she was visiting her sister, but her sister was not home.

From there, every chance she could she made a "visit" to her sister, and fucked Turner right under her roof. Sometimes she was even home, awake, distracted by something else. In their bedroom, in the bathroom, in the kitchen, the guest bedroom, in the living room, and outside on the porch.

Problem with Turner he claimed he was a "good guy" and loved her sister Keily, yet he fucked her every chance he could.

Men were stupid.

Sex was her replacement drug. The first time she snorted cocaine she was only sixteen. Crack was more readily available in her neighborhood growing up, so it became her drug of choice. Once she got the hit she needed, she would not feel the pain again. All alone. No one in her world loved her. Children hated her, but she resented them even more. They did not represent a mother's love. In all her years she could not remember ever loving them.

They just...were there.

She was her mother's child. She loved sex but never cared for the intimate part of it. Sex to her was a means to something else. She never paid for the drugs that coursed through her body, all she had to do was fuck whoever hit her.

Therefore, she did not know who the father of her kids was. She did not care to know. The drug dealer around the way. A fellow crackhead with a hit. Nameless faces of men who passed her around while she was passed out high.

Looking at her children only reminded her of what she had been through. In the streets most of her life. She ran away so many times her brother stopped looking for her after a while. It was always Alixandre driving around the hoe stroll, down Broadway looking for her in the dark corners.

He would drag her from the gutter, take her home, clean her up, and lecture her for hours. This was when she was eighteen and nineteen. While she was pregnant the first time, she lived with him till the baby was born, and then she quickly ran the streets again.

The next time she saw the family again, she was pregnant a second time and gave that baby away as well. Her brother could not keep them, so first they went into the DFS custody before her mother was able to take them in.

Through the years of their life, in between bouts of getting clean, miscarriages, and other babies she left before she even saw their faces, she would stop by her first two, hug them, tell them who she was, feel the pain again and then run off for the next high.

No wonder they hated her.

She hated herself.

"This is the last time," Turner said as he grunted with each thrust as he fucked her from the back as she hunched over the front hall table. She did not make it inside good and he was inside of her with his thick, hard dick. "This would kill Keily. She would relapse."

She shook her ass on his dick and laughed. "Or you could dump her and marry me. You know you have more fun with me."

"Your pussy is good." He thrust harder into her and kissed her neck. "And I think you're beautiful."

She was not one for romantics. Make her cum Make her feel ecstasy, then she could relive that high for a while before her next hit.

"Cum hard for me, Daddy."

He was much too young for her sister anyway. He was even younger than her at thirty-four. Why would this virile, handsome, well-endowed man want some washed-up old has-been pornstar like her sister?

She hated them all.

She killed her sister. It was her.

Tamra had everything. The perfect daughter. The perfect mother. Good life. While she was out on the streets, never did she or her other siblings, besides Alix try and help her. Never mind that Brandon, Trevor, and Jalena were in prison. Baby brother Roberto looked at her as if she was trash.

She hated them all.

She hoped they all die.

A/N: Soooooo....the whole family is cray cray?? Got that? Good. Now did she really kill her sister?

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