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High As French Toast

somewhere in the oblivion 13, and i cannot stress this enough, fucking idiots, are at it once again the next day

jihoon: would you fuckers be quiet for ONE second?!?

seungkwan: it's not our fault your ass was stupid enough to put vodka in a smoothie

minghao: that's like asking the gods to give you more height

jihoon: FUCKING- BITCH

jeonghan: who's yelling now HUH

vernon: AND he can't beat our asses because now he REALLY can't reach

jihoon: i hate you all

soonyoung: that doesn't count me right-

jihoon: did i fucking stutter

soonyoung: *tears up* ⁿᵒ

jihoon: *lays his head back down on his pillow* the second you all start screaming again, i'm leaving. it's giving me an even bigger headache.

seokmin: my kitchen's a mess.. *cries into a towel while his stove is on fire AGAIN and his dog is barking at it like that's gonna help don't judge him he's doing his best*

vernon: i just realized i can't turn in the ashes so i'm eating them

wonwoo: i never thought i'd have to sleep on the couch because a cat pissed on my sheets

seungkwan: and your dumbass threw a bowl of cereal on them

wonwoo: i'm telling you, i hate it here

seungcheol: i give up on the puzzle i'm finishing it tomorrow

joshua: that's what you said yesterday

seungcheol: that's what you said yesterday about that project we have

joshua: ...

seungcheol: choke on it bitch

minghao: i'm done with all my work for the week

vernon: *using a knife and fork to cut a slice out of them  t a s t y  ashes* GOOD FOR YOU

soonyoung: *talking with his mouth full* these taste so bad but i'm the only one in the house i have to eat them

mingyu: next time, double check you're putting them in the oven and not the dishwasher

chan: *is falling asleep at his desk*

jeonghan: *sitting on his living room floor and reading a piece of paper* i have to do math to build a fucking shelf-

vernon: just do meth instead

seungkwan: *sighs* jeonghan

jeonghan: what?

seungkwan: maybe you wouldn't have to do math if you weren't reading your fucking math homework right now

jeonghan: *stares at the paper for a solid 5 seconds*

jeonghan: i knew that. *tosses it aside and picks up the ACTUAL instructions*

jihoon: *leans off his bed to grab his charger*

wonwoo: i bet 100 dollars he's not gonna make it

jihoon: fuck off- *falls off his bed and drops his phone*

joshua: never again will you be allowed to drink

seokmin: the fire's gone but now there's a huge dent in my stove

seokmin: microwave pizza rolls again it is

soonyoung: *has resorted to shoving all of them in his mouth at the same time*

soonyoung: *chokes*

minghao: as expected, dumb fuck

(ikr, stupid hoe i'm kidding i love him)

soonyoung: *spits the cookies out* yeah i'm doing fucking fantastic, thanks for asking

jeonghan: WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PIECES *SCREAMS*

chan: *bangs his head on the desk on accident* FORTY TWO-

seungcheol: now you know how i feel

jun: the stain is not coming off i have to live with it now

mingyu: is it paying rent?

jun: it better or we're gonna have problems *stares down the stain*

chan: i was going to say i wanna go home but i forgot i am home *face-plants onto the desk again*

wonwoo: *cat meowing in the background*

wonwoo: shut the fuck up you already had cereal

*cat keeps meowing*

wonwoo: THY WAS MY CEREAL, MAY I REMIND YOU

*(((MEOWING INTENSIFIES)))*

jihoon: *finally arises from the dead once more* fucking soonyoung

soonyoung: WHAT DID I DO-¿?

jihoon: i don't know, i need someone to blame *picks up his phone*

seungkwan: jeonghan that does not look like a shelf

jeonghan: .....it's modern art

seungcheol: i'm hungry but there's nothing to eat

joshua: why do you think i went out shopping last week

seungcheol: HELLO? i'm poor

seokmin: i've been eating nothing but pizza rolls for three weeks

minghao: where did you get enough pizza rolls to last you three weeks

seokmin: *in tears* student loans

vernon: *crunching on ashes* gourmet

soonyoung: all i had were dish soap tasting cookies yesterday and today

chan: all i had was pain

joshua: i'll buy food for you guys

mingyu: DID YOU SAY YOU'D BUY US FOOD-

joshua: only for ONE of you what do you think i'm made out of? money?

jeonghan: lies

jeonghan: you're made out of lies

joshua: this time i promise-

jun: i have nothing to lose and everything to gain

joshua: we'll have a competition

joshua: 3am losers, be there or be a triangle
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i have nothing to say for myself

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