Whenever I sat in front of the piano, I always remembered that girl who named "Do Remi"; her cute face, her gentle laugh and her shining eyes are vivid on my memories. When I visioned her once, three words came from my lips, "I miss you."

5 years ago, Dino, Vernon and I used to hang out at a certain convenience store after our classes. There, we've met a girl standing behind the counter. She's 3 years older than us so we called her "Nuna" (older sis).

"So how was your school today?" She asked while scanning the bar codes of our ice creams.

"Very tiring, nuna" Dino was always the first one to complain. Next was me.

"Math hates me a lot," I sighed.

"My snack was strawberry pie," Vernon answered differently.

Remi nuna showed her empathy by soothing my back. Maybe she found me easy to approach because I was the talkative one among our group. "Awww, cheer up guys. Here, ice creams will help." She gave us our ice creams and the three of us combined our extra allowances to pay them.

"Thank you nuna," Dino said.

"Sure sure," nuna chuckled.

It wasn't exaggerated if I'll say that Remi nuna was our strength giver. If one of us had problems because of school activities, our childish quarrel or small matters from our households, nuna was always there to listen and to give advice.

One time, I had a fight with my sister just because I forgot to wash our dishes before going to school. I'd cry a lot and even think of running away from home. Before I stupidly do, I went to the convenience store and had a talk with Remi nuna.

"I hate her so much," I shared.

"I see," nuna nodded her head. "Seungkwan."

"Hmmm?"

"Do you know the first basic tune in piano?"

That time, I wondered why she suddenly talked about piano. Still, I answered, "Doremi?"

"Just like my name, right?" She laughed and soon I also did.

"Do Remi," I repeated.

"Among you guys, I could see that you are the most emotional one. Vernon tends to think freely while Dino forgot everything after he let it all out."

I remained silent as I listened.

"So, if you feel really stressed out, why don't you think of my name?"

"Your name?"

"Hmmm. Doremi is the basic tune. It's not difficult. Even kids can play it on piano."

"Then, what does it mean?"

Remi nuna placed her hand at the top of my head. "Problems will be difficult if you think the it is difficult. However, if you see your worries like doremi, it'll be easy."

Nuna didn't give me the exact meaning of her advice. But with that, I learned to stay positive as much as possible, as simple as her name.

"Hey Seungkwan, you seemed to be in good mood nowadays," Dino commented.

We're sitting on the bench during our P.E time.

"Right," Vernon agreed. "He doesn't get angry as much as he did before."

"Remi nuna is cool at giving advice," I chuckled while looking at our teacher. He's currently scolding John.

"Stop bothering nuna so much. She's busy," Dino complained.

"But you always go there too," Vernon threw offense to Dino.

Dino then pointed himself, "did I?" Then the three of us laughed together.

"Well, nuna seemed the only one who gladly listen to our worries," Vernon sighed.

They said words we blurted without thinking come from our hearts, not in our minds. Therefore, when I accidentally slipped my secret in front of my friends just because I was too overwhelmed, I knew it was true.

"I like nuna," I confessed. Surprised by my own confession, I stared back at Dino and Vernon.

"Like... You... Love her as a woman?" Vernon elaborated in slow speech.

Since it was too late to play dumb, I nodded with a sigh. "Y-Yeah."

"Oh? I love her too," Dino suddenly shared.

"Me too," Vernon also did.

That's when we realized that we all had the same first love. The three of us decided to hide our feelings until we graduated from highschool. A highschool student confessing to a grown up lady could be hard; that's what we've considered.

Finally, after our graduation, Dino, Vernon and I went to nuna's place with flowers on our hands. We wanted a fair play and we were ready to accept her decision. Thinking about this convinced me how immature we were back then.

When we arrived at nuna's place, the door was slightly opened. We heard loud voices coming from inside.

"This is it? You think we can pay our monthly rent with this?!"

"Aunt, I gave you all my wage last month. If we add that, isn't it enough?"

"You b*tch!"

Loud sound of broken glass. 'Afgsgshsjsjshhaaj!'

"What are you intending to say?! That I spent your money?! Where did I get the food you ate everyday?!"

"Aunt, you... Only left rice for me. I was even lucky to find rice at the kitchen."

"W-What?!"

"You gambled too much."

"What?!"

'Agsyushshgsusjj!' Another thud sounds as if their house were turning up side down.

"Is this how you'll repay my generosity?! I raised you when your parents died and you dared talk back at me?!"

"Aunt! Stop it! Please! It hurts!"

"What?!"

"Aunt please! Aahhh!"

"Someone as worthless as you deserve to be alone! You're nothing! I picked you up even though you're worst than a garbage! But you dared complained?!"

"Aunt!" She sobbed.

"Die instead! Die! Die!"

The three of us stood at the entrance without saying anything. I knew it wasn't only me who remembered the days when we complained our worries to her. She received it very warm and she gave us advice with a smile. But... We didn't know that behind the gentle her are stories that's too far from our problems. She's suffering more than I did. She cried more than I cried. She feels lonely more than anyone.

Who am I to stand before her and said: 'Cheer up. Ice cream will help'?

Door opened. Remi nuna stopped when she saw us standing in front of the door. Her eyes were wet and her hair was disheveled. But one the caught me the most was her expression of mixed guilt and embarrassment.

Days passed by.

Vernon reported to the police what we've witnessed. The police captured her aunt, not only because of the abuse but also because of illegal drug usage. Rumors spread throughout the neighborhood. Some pity Remi nuna but some spoke ill without knowing the truth.

Remi nuna... changed. She rarely smile or speak. Her expressions was lifeless as if her life was devoured by a black hole.

Vernon, Dino and I didn't have the courage to visit her after the incident. We were worried if she will feel embarrass if we stand before her. Or either we don't have right words to say.

'We will wait until she's ready. We will wait,' this is what we had in our minds. Because we believe that surely, a day will come when we are all ready to talk about her life.

"G-Good morning nuna," I awkwardly greeted her at the convenience store.

"Hello Seungkwan," she greeted back with faint smile. "Its been a long time since I saw you. I didn't see Vernon and Dino too. I missed you guys."

I wanted to say how much I missed her but I did not. Instead I uttered,"Ahhhh, yeah, hehe."

"How's college life by the way?"

"Well, my professor gave us too..." I stopped in the middle of my sentence.

'Our first meeting after a long time shouldn't be like this. Nuna is suffering more than I so I should not talk about my problem.'

"I'm good nuna. I'm all good," I murmured.

"Hmmmm," nuna sighed. "You don't want to share your problem because you're afraid that you'll burden me. Right?"

'No!' I wanted to disagree but nothing came from my lips.

"Anyway..." She chuckled as she looked back. "Be happy Seungkwan. Don't you ever surrender no matter how life is difficult. Just think of it as my name. Okie dokie?"

"Y-Yeah. Thank you, nuna."

Yes. Thank you. Yes. Thank you.

I didn't know that those two words were the last things I told to nuna. After she cheered me up, nuna took her own life.

There are things I regretted until now. Nuna asked us if we're okay, but we never asked her. We just waited, without doing anything, until she gave up.

Sometimes, there are people who always listen to our stories. They cried for us, they tapped our backs and they cheered for us. However, those people maybe look strong outside but everyday for them could be a climb in a cliff; that if no one reach out their hand, they'll fall.

So ask. Learn not only to speak out. Ask.

"Seungkwan, are you okay?" Vernon asked when he saw me crying in front of the piano.

Sobbing so hard, I placed my fingers on the piano tiles and gently tapped the first basic tune: "Do Re Mi."

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