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Evelyn

I worked another double shift. My feet are freaking aching like crazy. All I want to do is sleep...but that is not happening. By the time I swing by to get Jamie, Kylie and Marcus from the sitter and hand her the nice fifty dollars that I busted my butt for the week, I only have like twenty dollars to go to the store and find something to feed these screaming kids.

I want to sleep...but I can't because I have to cook dinner and then put them all to bed. I slave all day in the factory and then slave at home, cooking, cleaning...and I have nothing to show for any of it except these three kids...that keep crying for me to cook faster.

"Mommy is almost done...guys...chill for a second...alright, dang." I try not to raise my voice but it comes out a little louder than I mean for it to.

 I get out three plates and three forks. I fix each of them a plate and they sit in front of the TV, watching Frozen...yet again for the hundredth time. We have this small flat screen TV, and a DVD player. I don't have money to pay for cable or one of those satellite things. I sit on the run down couch and close my eyes only for a second. Because the next second Marcus is yelling at Kylie for taking his car.

"Guys...stop yelling...you are going to wake up moma." Jamie yells at them.

"Too....late...guys. If you are done eating let's get ready for bed."

"But moma...it's too early...it's still day light outside."

"I know...but I'm tired guys and it's going on eight o'clock...I can't help if the sun is still up."

"I want a bath." Demands Kylie.

"You had one yesterday...you don't need one every day." I tell her.

"But I want a bath...and then I will go to bed." She throws her hands on her hips. For a three year old she acts more like a thirteen year old...attitude and all.

I throw my hands up in the air. "Fine...take a bath and then to bed...got it."

"Yes...mommy."

We go to the bathroom and I run the bath water. She takes off her clothes and jumps right in. Then Jamie runs into the bathroom and jumps in with her. She is my oldest...at five years old. While they are in the bathroom, I go to see what Marcus is doing. He just turned two. He is playing in the floor still. I go to pick him up and then change his diaper, putting on his night clothes and placing him in the Pack and Play...I don't have a baby bed for him. I had gotten rid of the bed after having Kylie...because I thought I was done having kids.

 But then lord and behold, I just had to hook up with this dead beat guy and got myself into anther pickle...nine months later out popped Marcus.I never thought I would be twenty-four with three kids living on my own. If one had asked me five years ago I would have laughed all in their faces.

 I got pregnant with Jamie at nineteen. Then I was madly in love, but soon after she was born everything fell apart. He took off with one of my good friends and I haven't seen him since. I was done with guys but then Kylie's dad came along. He was a sweet-talker. Talked about helping me out with Jamie and even bought all kinds of things for the both of us. I thought he too would stick around but yet again about two months after she was born he said he just couldn't do it any longer.I knew that I would not stay with Marcus's dad...matter of fact he left way before I even had him.

So here I am working double shifts down at the pencil factory and making ends meet. After they are all in bed asleep, I too lay down hoping to get a few hours of sleep before waking back up before going right back into work. Same old day every day. My parents were nice enough to take the kids on Saturday night. I told them I was staying home to get some sleep but when my phone goes off, I get dressed and meet up my friend, Jasmine at one of the bars.

 We have a few drinks and dance with several guys. One thing leads to another and I take one home with me. What...a grown girl is allowed to have a little fun every now and then. No sooner than we walk in to my apartment he has his hands all over me. I have my hands all over him. We tug and pull each other's clothes off. I lead him to my bedroom and I let him have his way with me...of course I take all of it.

I need it...I need to feel loved...to feel special...to feel human. The next morning he gets up and takes a shower. He comes out of the bathroom smiling. "So...that was an amazing night...thanks."

"You're welcome...thank you as well."

"So how many kids do you have?" He says as he kicks one of the toys out of his way.

"Three...they stayed the night with my parents. I was supposed to be sleeping...resting all night."

"Oh...I kept you awake half the night...sorry."

"Actually you just helped me sleep better. Would you like some breakfast?"

"Sure, what you got?"

I get up and walk to the fridge...I have a few eggs and a package of bacon. I cook and he eats like he is starving. "Thanks for a good night...and breakfast. I guess I better get going. Maybe I will catch you later."

"Sure...you know where I live. Oh here is my number." I grab a pen and write in down on his hand. He looks up at me and smiles. When he leaves, I close the door and jump in the shower.

That was over a month ago...One fun night...leads to nine months pregnant. I know what you are thinking...why don't I have this fixed by now. Well in this state...you have to be over twenty-five to get fixed, regardless how many children you have. I have three. I have begged the doctors the last time to just do it...but nope...it's against the law. What the hell. I am twenty-four...with three kids under the age of five and here I go again.

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