Life is a fluid ,ever changing.Everyone who enters your life must leave it eventually, how you choose to spend your time with them is entirely upto you.During the whole time,I was thinking she departed from me but I had never imagined that she left me and the world forever.No,she can't go like this.

Ruhi Shukla who died last week

These were the words ringing in my mind.Ruhi is dead,no this can't be my Ruhi .There are many girls in the world with Ruhi name. Yeah,it's another girl not my Ruhi but I have to clear my doubts.

I opened the door of the room and entered inside.

Sid:Sorry doctor to interrupt you like this but please can I see the reports of the patient who were talking about

Nurse:sorry sir but it's against our rules,you can't see it

Doc:nurse ,it's okay he can see

Nurse:but doc-

Doc:He is a family member so he can see it,Sidharth it's your right....take it

The doctor said passing the file to me.Right,what right and how he knows my name.This is getting more complex.I nervously took the file from him and looked in it.

Name-Ruhi Shukla

Age-35 years old

Mother's name - Shruti Sinha

Father's name-Harshit Sinha

Husband name-Sidharth Shukla

Date of death -20th July 2021,2:00pm

No ,maybe it is another Ruhi with same parents name and husband name.Yeah,it can be possible but this is not my Ruhi.I turn the page and looked at the photo.Same brown eyes,same cheeks ,same lips.It is Ruhi.

Doc:she was a nice woman Sidharth, she was not only my patient but my friend also.....she had leukemia,I tried my best but we couldn't save her

I stood there like a statue as if my body got paralyzed. No ,no whatever the doctor is telling is false this is not my Ruhi.This can't be.She can't die.

Sid:doc are you sure this is my Ruhi,maybe you have a misunderstanding....this is not my Ruhi

Doc:Sidharth I have no misunderstanding, this is your Ruhi,your wife.....you have to calm down and accept the truth that Ruhi is dead

Sid:no doctor ,Ruhi is not dead....I know she is away from me but not so away from me

Doc:Sidharth believe me

The doctor was trying his best to make me understand but how can I believe it.The woman who taught me how to love ,who taught me how it feels to be loved,how beautiful love is ,is not more.

Sid:can I take this file with me

The doctor looked surprised at my sudden question but came out of his suprised state and nodded.

Doc:nurse,we have the copy of the report in the hospital ?

Nurse:yes doctor

Doc:okay,Sidharth you can take it

I nodded and immediately moved out of the room and started walking towards the exit of the hospital. I kept the file in the passenger seat and started driving.

Sid:ofcourse the doctor was lying,Ruhi can't die,she can't leave me forever.......I know I have hurt her but she can't give me such a big punishment ,noooo

I frustratedly banged my hand on the steering wheel and immediately parked the car in outside Prachi's house.I came out of the car and held the file close to my heart.

I was trembling on each step I took as if my legs had given up.Somehow I rang the bell and an elderly lady opened the door.

I entered the house without saying anything to her.I started walking towards my room but stopped midway as I remembered something. No,this time I won't neglect anyone nor my responsibilities.

Sid:Where is Ansh?

Sima:sir he is sleeping in the room

Sid:hmm

Again I started walking without turning back.I could hear the faint voices of the lady but I didn't turned around.I heard one line ,

Sir why are you crying?

I touched my cheeks and then I realized that I was crying all the way long.I closed the door behind me and sat on the floor with a thud.

Sid:no,this can't happen....you can't leave me Ruhi,please

I sobbed and screamed repeating the same thing.My life was completely shattered.There was a sudden hollow in my heart and only one person could fill it.Ruhi ,my Ruhi.
*************
Shehnaaz opened her eyes and looked at her surroundings. She frustratedly rubbed her face and tried to gain her conciousness fully.She had slept on the floor.Her headphones were lying on the floor with her laptop still switched on.Last she remembered that she was watching Fault in our stars.It has been two days since she found Sidharth's door locked.

Sana:fuck

She combed her hair with her fingers and closed her laptop.Taking her phone out,she looked at her schedule and saw that today she had to go "Dreams".But she didn't knew whether she should go or not.She thought to contact Jenny .She had tried calling Sidharth but everytime the sound came,the number who are trying to contact is switched off.

Sana:hi Jenny

Jenny:hey Sana,how are you

Sana:I'm fine

Fine.The one word she keeps repeating to herself .But was she fine?She herself didn't knew how she was but definitely she was not fine.She herself was not understanding what was going on with her and her life.She was just fine or maybe just trying to be fine.

Sana: Has Sidharth come to the office?

Jenny:no and I think he won't come also for some days

Sana:why?

Jenny:I don't know,Jay sir called Ajay and told that Sidharth won't be coming for some days

Sana:ohh....should I come today?

Jenny:we are almost done Sana,it's just that Sidharth need to see it once and approve it but since he is not here,I  think no need to come until Sidharth comes

Sana:okay

Jenny:do you have plans for today?....I mean if you are free we can go out

Sana:Jenny actually I am busy ,sorry

Jenny:ohh it's okay sweetheart, take care ,bye

Sana:bye

Shehnaaz disconnected the call and leaned her back against the couch.She lied.She didn't had any work but she was not in the state to go anywhere.Suddenly she started chuckling dryly.

Sana:how can you think Sana that they would be forever with you,nobody is forever with you....happiness is never forever in your life

She sighed in defeat and got up from the floor.Going to the kitchen, she opened the drawer and swallowed two pills inside her mouth.Again she came to the living room and layed on the floor.

She blankly looked at the ceiling and started remembering the moments with Sidhansh and Sidharth. Tears flowed out of her eyes.Though she didn't knew why she was crying. Because she was missing them?Because she is thinking that they left her?Or because she is again alone?The tears didn't stopped and soaked her cheeks.

Nobody wanted her in their life.Nobody wanted to stay with her .But they are also right who wanted to stay with a mess like her.She was a mess.A complete mess.
************
Jay:Sidharth fucking open the door?

Mahi:what the hell Sidharth,we need to talk to you....you can't just lock yourself like this

I couldn't hear anything except the faint voices of door banging or maybe I don't wanted to hear.I blankly kept staring at her pic.She was smiling just the way she did whenever she looked at me.I could feel her brown eyes staring back at me.

Sid:where are you Ruhi,you can't just fucking leave me....didn't you trusted me that you didn't told me ever about your disease?

Doc:she was suffering since seven years from leukemia

Sid:what,seven years?(whisper)

Doc:yes,I told her to inform her family but she told that she didn't wanted to hurt,she didn't wanted to break them but after two years they themselves came to know.....I told her to tell you also but she immediately refused and even forced me to not tell you

Sid:why

Why?only one question was ringing in my mind.Didn't she trusted me?Didn't I deserved to know about it?Prachi was right.It's my fault in mom's condition, in Ruhi's death. It's all my fault.

The banging voice became loud and the next moment I heard footsteps coming towards me.I lifted my face and looked at them.

Mahi:Sidharth(whisper)

Mahi's face turned into complete worry and shock as she looked at me.She kneeled infront of me and kept staring at me with concern.I ran a hand through my messy hairs.Definitely my eyes would have turned red .

Jay:Sidharth I am sorry for what I told but it's important for bua,try to understand Sid

Sid:she left me

Mahi:Sidharth she is here only,she is fine

Sid:no,no,she left me....she left me forever

Mahi:who Sidharth?

Sid:ruhi(whisper)

It came out as a whisper but it was audible enough for both of them to hear.Both were shocked but more confused .

Mahi:Sidharth you had came out of the trauma of yours and Ruhi's separation but again why are you falling into it.....don't do it Sidharth

Sid:she left me Mahi, my Ruhi died

Mahi:what....no ,Sidharth she didn't die,she is alive ,okay....what the hell are you speaking

Mahi suddenly turned angry on hearing him.She had always seen Ruhi as her sister and she couldn't tolerate such words about her.But she also knew that Sidharth wouldn't lie about such things.

Jay:seriously, Sidharth....you have gone ma-

Jay stopped midway and looked at the file lying on the floor.He picked it up and started reading it.His eyes became heavy and he looked at Mahi with tears in his eyes.Mahi noticed his change in expression and she herself started feeling anxious.

Mahi:Jay?

Jay frantically nodded and slumped on the bed.Mahi covered her mouth to control her sobs. She looked at Sidharth and now understood his condition.Tears started flowing from her eyes.

Sid:how could she do this Mahi, how could she leave me.....no,no my Ruhi can't die,look the way she is smiling in the picture

Mahi:Sidharth(sobbed)

Sid:my Ruhi can't leave me Mahi,tell me this is a lie....please

Mahi:Sidharth she is dead

Sid:nooooo

Pain started rising in my chest and my breathing started becoming heavy. I could hardly see anything. My heart was beating so fast as if it would come out of my chest.I could feel the blood rushing down my ears.

Mahi:Sidharth,breathe.....Sidharth

She was gone.Leaving me alone .I could feel the pressure building inside me.My stomach twisted in a knot,my nausea and pressure driving my panic.

Jay:Sidharth breath

Nothing was audible to me.Darkness started consuming me .My eyes started closing but still my heart was beating fastly. I didn't wanted to live.I wanted to be with her.Finally my eyes closed and I couldn't see anything. I just wished to go to her.

I was a mess,a complete mess.
************************************
Quite a long part🥺🥺

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