dear hoseok,

yesterday jihyo asked me if i have ever been in love before.
i couldn't answer it.
of course ive been in love—i am in love.
i just couldn't tell her about you without bursting into tears.
so i simply shook my head no.
she said she had been in love once and that she hoped to be my first love.
i hate myself for doing this to her.
i don't have the heart to end this relationship.
but it's also not fair to her.
i don't know why i even asked her out.
why am i trying so hard to be who im not?
who am i trying to fool?
i did the same to you and for that im so sorry.
i didn't stand up for our love or for you.
you took the fall without hesitation and i owed you at least that...at least speaking up to defend you.
i hope you're doing well.
i hope you've found love again and that you have healed.
i hope you don't shed tears for me no more.
i just want you to be happy for the rest of your life.
i|

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