🎧 Author recommends: listen to the song up here while reading this chapter. More notes about it at the end.

The rain was crashing against the windows, it had started raining a few days before and it never stopped. I felt like the sky was mirroring my feelings. The Scandinavian house was dark and silent. Wooyoung was in his study reading some work documents. I tiptoed into the room, he heard my steps and turned around.

"What are you doing? You scared me"

"I need to tell you something" I said gravely.

"What is it?" he looked at me alarmed.

"I'm getting married, I found the right person" I cut it short, my heart beating fast.

He stood in silence, watching me. God, I knew that look so well: it was the same one - how many years had passed since then? - of when he got me and Seonghwa together, when I told him that I was tired of him, that I didn't need him anymore... Surprise and hurt clearly showing on his face.

I felt my nose tingling and I had to hasten to lower my head: "It had to happen sooner or later"

Silence. Still the same silence. It was breaking me.

"If..." I hesitated, feeling bad to ask him what I had in mind "If you want we can still see eachother. I will have a wife, but nothing else will change. My feelings for you haven't changed" I whispered.

Wooyoung's eyes were full of tears, he stared at me lost, his pale lips quivered painfully. He lowered his gaze and sniffed: I could tell that he was trying so hard to stifle his feelings and hold back the tears.

After a while he faced me again. He smiled bitterly.

"I knew it all along. I'm not stupid. I just pretended to not see it. But it still hurts"

His eyes were puffy and still glassy, his lips were still shaking. He lowered his head once again. I couldn't hold myself any longer. Tears started streaming down my face too, I ran to Wooyoung, holding him thight in my arms.

"I don't want this either, but I don't get to choose" I said, kissing him. Our lips were wet with all our tears.

Wooyoung opened his mouth and took out his tongue to wipe away all my tears. When he stopped he turned and took the serviettes sitting on his desk handing me some of them. He smiled, but it was a sad smile. I mirrored him, trying to curve up my lips. We stayed like that, one in front of the other, blowing our noses and smiling lost at each other.

After a while we hugged again. I felt Wooyoung's mouth on my neck, kissing me softly. His tongue tasting my skin. He started to undress me and I followed him removing his clothes too. He pushed me on the carper and started to lick me in that same way he was so used to. He never moved his eyes away from mine. Neither did I. When he got to my lower half I couldn't even focus on what he was doing, so caught up in his stare. I wasn't getting hard. I tried to turn the tables, I pinned him down and I tried to suck him off but I received a even milder response. Wooyoung stopped me and pulled out from under his back an eraser. We looked at eachother and we started laughing. We didn't need to have sex. The only thing I needed was right beneath me. Just knowing that he was still mine was enough to make me feel better.

We had a hot bath toghether. I washed his hair and his body, trying to take care of him as much as I could. I massaged his shoulders and his back. I kissed his hot skin softly. I caressed his body without malice, just trying to let him feel how dear he was to me. When he came out of the water I hugged a big towel around him, pulling his wet body against mine to keep him warm. I dried his hair and dressed him for the night.

In the middle of the night, in our bed, we started making love again and this time it was beautiful. We did it with enthusiasm and passion, touching and tasting our bodies with a new awareness. We melted in eachother arms, our bodies becoming just one, hearts beating fast. 

When we finished he sat leaning his back on the headboard and I layed my head on his legs, his fingers started to brush my hair, massaging me in that familiar way that I loved so much.

"You should dye your hair black again. They look damaged" he whispered.

"Mmh" I closed my eyes sinking in that comfortable feeling.

"I'm scared, San"

"Me too"

"I thought you would break up with me for good"

"I couldn't" I opened my eyes once again looking for his gaze. My hand flew to his cheek wiping new tears that had started running down his face again "I told you once: I can't live without you. My heart belongs to you, Wooyoung. I love you, I really do"

He nodded closing his eyes and he let more tears falling down.

A/N

I'm heartbroken 💔

This song is the OST of my favourite K-drama, "Uncontrollably fond", it already makes me weapy just by listening to it. Today I reached a new level: listening to it and thining about my Woosan broke me completely. 

If you haven't watch this K-drama and you feel like crying you can find it on Viki Rakuten, it's for free and you don't need a premium account to watch it.

🥰 Please keep giving love to this story: vote and comment. My chat is always open if you want to talk more about it.

Also notice: I will be on holiday from tomorrow till the new year. I'll try to update on the 30th but can't promise, I don't know if I'll make it. So, I wish you all merry Christmas (if you celebrate it) and happy new year. 

Love you 3000 ❤️

Alice