September becomes October, and the woman shows up at the diner again. I sneak out the backdoor, leaving Marie to deal with her. My birthday is rapidly approaching, but I haven't told the others. After they've been so forthcoming with me, I haven't told them anything.

Jacob is sullen and withdrawn. I wouldn't be surprised if ghosts were real anymore. He might be one. I'm the one haunting him though.

We spend evenings indoors, with always someone home to watch over me. Usually, that person is Jacob, but he keeps to his room. Quil and Embry patrol at night with Seth. They grow more and more tired, eat more and more food. Apartment hunting is out of the question until we kill off that woman.

They don't tell me if they come in contact with her, ever, but I get the feeling that they spend their nights chasing her. Jacob won't keep me privy to any pertinent information. I wish he would just tell me things. He's so hell-bent on protecting me sometimes, that I think he forgets that I'm a whole person, with emotions and feelings.

"It happens in the woods," Jacob says, one of the few things he tells me. "That woman turning you into one of those disgusting things. So don't go in there. Under any circumstances."

I keep going to my job at the diner. She won't attack me in broad daylight, they claim. It would break vampire law, or whatever. However, when Marie invites me out for Saturday, I have to turn her down again. It's not safe for me to be out at night.

One night, while Quil and Embry are out, Jacob and I sit around the living room. He taps the chair, boredom consuming him. It's a muffled death, like falling asleep with chloroform. I want to do something with him, but I don't know that there are all too many games we can play. He's blind, after all. I'm sure they make board games for blind people, but Jacob doesn't have any.

"How much longer will it be like this?" I ask. "She's going to catch me eventually. Alice saw it."

"Alice's visions aren't set in stone," he tells me. "She could change her mind. That's Carlisle's plan anyway. He wants to talk sense into her."

I doubt someone who is playing mind games with me.

"I saw her again yesterday," I point out.

Jacob grumbles something.

"If you mumble, I can't understand you," I say, sighing.

"I asked why you didn't feel the need to tell me earlier," Jacob turns his head over at me.

There is a Jacob I like and a Jacob I don't appreciate. His overprotective behaviour is toxic, but I know that nature isn't his dominant personality. The rage, the annoyance, the certainty, sure it's part of him but it's not him. I watch how he laughs with his friends, and I can tell there is something to him that was lost. Maybe it was when he went blind, maybe it was when Bella said she wasn't interested, maybe it was something else entirely that set him off.

That said, I try to bring out the anger in him the least. I didn't tell him because I didn't want to revel in his anguish with him. If my death is inevitable, which apparently it isn't, then I would like to see his happy side as much as possible.

"Let's play a game," I try to distract him. "Do you have cards with braille on them?"

"Can't read braille," he answers.

Fair enough. I don't really know sign language. He recently went blind too. It must be hard for him, hanging out here every day with nothing to do. I know he used to tinker on cars and ride motorcycles. It all seems far removed now.

"Well, what do you like to do for fun?" I ask.

He shifts in his seat, moving back and forth. "I like drinking. Riding motorcycles too, and cliff-diving is always fun."

He's more of the active type. I know I can't compete against him physically, but I wonder what we can do together. It's hard. We don't fit quite right, like two pieces of different puzzles. How can I be his everything if we can't even find a way to spend a Saturday night together?

"We should do pottery together," I say. "Or play-dough or something."

"I don't have any," Jacob says, biting his lip. "Being blind is miserable."

Now, I don't think that's quite fair. People with disabilities can live just as fulfilling lives as anyone else. Then again, I don't want to trample all over his experience. Rather, I grab his phone off of the coffee table and begin to browse YouTube.

"Tell you what?" I begin, "I'll stop bothering you if you do karaoke with me."

"Home karaoke?" he asks, a smile erupting on his face. "How would we even do that?"

"With the magic of technology," I reply, typing into the phone. "What song do you want to do?"

Music was one of the few outside world things to slip into my life. Back with the convent, I wasn't allotted time between all my training for television or movies. Some reading was permitted. We had to follow the school curriculum after all. But when we trained, we would spend hours and hours listening to music.

I often complained because I have trouble hearing when there is background noise, but no matter.

Jacob sighs, "Don't Stop Believing. I know all the lyrics to that."

I search it up and pass him the phone. After an ad plays, the song comes on. He gives it his all, his voice cracking occasionally. He grins for most of the time, though the smile is a bit strained.

"That was awesome," I say when the song ends.

He laughs, "that... that was mediocre."

"You just need to get into the rhythm more," I tell him.

We trade songs for a bit. Call Me Maybe, Mr. Brightside, Single Ladies, and Jolene. The more I sing, the more comfortable I get. I know I'm nothing spectacular, but he thinks my voice is smooth as silk and as sweet as sugar.

I put on Hey Ya by the Outkasts, but I accidentally put on an acoustic guitar version. I get up and hold the tv remote like it's a microphone. The song is much slower than I anticipated, so I can't whip my hair back and forth like I wanted to do. Rather, I keep my body still and look at him.

He can't look back. I wish he could. Maybe it would be a dramatic change in his personality because he would imprint on me, but I don't care. It's not something I'm ready for, but never in my life have I been ready before. It's embarrassing. Two weeks ago I couldn't stand him. Now I want to be his forever?

Halfway through the song, I hear a scream outside. Pausing the music, I move over to Jacob.

"What's that?" I ask.

"Probably Quil saw a snake," Jacob says. "You'd think a wolf wouldn't be petrified by those things. I'll go check on them."

He gets up, and I begin to follow behind him. He turns around and puts his hands on my waist.

"Wait here," he instructs.

I feel myself shrinking. He doesn't think it's a snake, does he? I know that I can't compete against the supernatural, but I wish I could try.

Jacob opens the door and steps outside.

I wait ten seconds, then another ten. He doesn't come back. My feet begin to itch. The front door is so tempting. There is a secret out there. Secrets got me into this mess. Secrets won't get me out.

Finally, after what feels like hours of waiting with sweaty palms and an increased heart rate, I decide I cannot sit still. Rather than go out the front door, only to be met with opposition, I step out the back door.

I see her. Under the sky of clouds, she's there. That woman stands on the edge of the forest. She races up beside me. In a flash she was back there and now she is here. Quicker than lightning. Quicker than saying the word quick.

Jacob told me I had nothing to worry about so long as I don't go in the forest. He told me Alice foretold it. He also told me Alice's visions can change. If this woman wanted to try, she could pick me up and drag me into the forest. I wouldn't be able to stop her. I might be able to scream in time.

Thunder rolls above us, but it isn't raining. Not yet.

"Hasn't..." I swallow, filling my lungs with air. "Hasn't anyone told you it's impolite to play with your food?"

"I left you a present on the porch," she tells me. "You should go see it."

I hear something muffled, something far away. The woman tilts her head to the side and runs away. She's gone in less time it took for her to threaten me. She disappears into the trees rather quickly.

The backdoor slams behind me, and Embry runs through it. He stands with his arms hanging at his sides like he expects me to run into them. "Fawn, do you know a Marie Campbell?"

~~~~~

I am content with this. Some cute stuff. No confrontation yet. I'm so excited! It's going to be so fun!