Thursday, January 1st, 2015
First Day of Meeting

As I approached the Wilmington building, I panicked. The parking lot was full of parked vehicles, and from my view; it wasn't time worthy to look for an opening as I was running late for the AA meeting.

So, without thinking too much about it, I decided to park Ophelia in an open spot on the curbside not too far away from the building. It wasn't what I wanted to do, since I have always been scared to maneuver my car without hitting another vehicle.

I dread parallel parking, but it was my only option.

Despite the fact that frustration came upon me, I quickly turned around to see if the coast was clear before I made my move. Praying that I wouldn't block traffic, I backed up a bit and moved the steering wheel to the left and positioned my car to fit within the open space between the Jeep and the Dodge pickup.

I went outside to check if my vehicle was centered properly and if I left ample space for the other two cars to move. After seeing that these positions were done correctly, I congratulated myself in successfully parking Ophelia in the vacant spot.

Yet, I groaned as I saw a parking meter waiting for me by the curb. Must have missed it earlier, as I was distracted with my thoughts.

To me, the city just wants to collect cold hard cash in exchange for the right to park a vehicle in a particular place, for a limited amount of time. I like to help them out, but sometimes giving them our salaries that we worked hard for could be burdensome.

Call me a Scrooge, but I'm not rich!

But for safe keeping, I had some coins tucked away in the glove compartment for emergencies like this one. As I opened it, I grabbed two quarters from the bag, and inserted the coins in the hourly slot. Hopefully, it won't take me that long till I come back. Later, I'll have to figure out how to back out my car from this small space, but that will have to wait.

After I closed the door and made sure my car was locked, I ran to enter the building. Slowing down to look for any directory that showed where all the rooms were located, I tried to catch my breath as all that running in heels wiped me out. Touching my hips as I walked to calm down, I mumbled to myself.

Dang it! I should've worn tennis shoes!

I walked further down the hallway and found a map posted on the wall near the elevator. Found out that the Alcoholic Anonymous meeting was held upstairs in Room 325. I looked at my watch and it read 4: 45 p.m.

Great, just great! I only have 15 minutes to get up there and am wearing high heels to top it off. Marlene does not like to be tardy and am not a lazy person. I always want to make a good impression.

Well, the elevator happens to be my savior as I'm hoping it will get me there as soon as possible.

What else do I have to lose?

As I was about to press the button that would make the elevator go down, the clacking of high heels on the wooden steps approached me.

Another lady walking in those beautiful, yet aching pumps? What are the chances of that happening?

I smirked.

I guess it's a common choice that we females make. Can't hide that fact!

I turned around and saw a blonde trying to catch up to me. Then, the little beep that indicated that the elevator was about to open up ticked.

"Please, hold the door! I'm coming in!"

The lady in the red dress frantically shouted as if she just ran out of a horror flick.

Wonder what happened to her. And I thought I was having a bad day! Hers might just be twice as worse than mine.

I stood in front of the elevator's wide doors to keep them from closing, allowing the lady in red to come in.

She smiled at me and nodded. I took that as a gesture of her gratitude. A fake grin appeared on my face; as we were both running late. And I wasn't a bit interested in being friendly.

Yet, the minute the lady in red spoke, I knew the few moments of peacefulness would end. What a rough day!

"Hi! My name is Catherine . Thanks for keeping the elevator open. I'm running late for a meeting."

So perky! The way she spoke to me hurt my ear drums. Her voice was like a childlike squeal. Obviously someone needs to teach her how to remain calm and confident, as she's now placed on my 'people who are annoying' list.

Catherine reached out her hand as I looked at it curiously.

Well, there's only one thing to do! And somehow I felt Joshua's presence hovering over me, as if he couldn't leave his younger sister alone.

I imagine he'd say something like, "Well, what are you waiting for? Shake her hand, you little knucklehead ! That was the nickname he gave me and I guess I deserved it for driving him nuts.

I shook Catherine's hand as it was a polite gesture, even though I forced myself to do it.

"No problem. I'm Marlene. What meeting are you late for? I'm going to the AA one upstairs that will start soon."

Keeping my fingers crossed, I waited for her response as I was hoping it was another event she was going to attend. If this hyperactive lady with a high pitch voice was going to the same one, heaven forbid help me!

Although it might be nice to know someone else who was another struggling alcoholic, I'm one who wants to keep to herself right now.

"What a coincidence? I'm going there too! My brother, Gunther, is the man in charge of it. I'm helping him and his wife as they are just starting out."

Catherine kept talking, but I tuned out of the conversation. Don't mean to be rude, but now I'm starting to feel uneasy. Perhaps, I shouldn't have driven here in the first place. I know Joshua had good intentions for me to become sober, but to share my story with a bunch of strangers was nerve reckoning.

And right now, everything seems meaningless.

***************

The number three lit up above the elevator highlighted, indicating that the doors were opening soon.

"Well, this is our floor Marlene. Come and follow me, and I'll show you the way. We must fast walk in strides as we are already running late!"

As if we were Laverne and Shirley, two old friends walking together in strides, in the old sitcom. Give me a break, Cathy!

But since she knew where the room exactly was, I assumed we wouldn't get lost. After all, she did say her brother was the AA coordinator, so I didn't hesitate to follow her.

As we walked through the hallway, Catherine couldn't keep her damn mouth shut; I'd imagine that even if I taped it, she'll still be yapping away.

Catherine started talking about a handsome guy she met earlier and how he was the one that kept her late. I continued to smile, pretending to absorb all the information that was just spoken.

But, in the back of my mind, thoughts of how long this actual meeting would last began to stir up in my head. If this Gunther was anything like his sister, who knows how this session will end! I was also worried if the meter maid would give me a ticket, if I couldn't renew my payment on time.

Last thing I need is for my car to be towed!

***************

I didn't notice the sign indicating that we just passed rooms 320 - 330, until Catherine yanked my arm. Being puzzled at first, I was about to retaliate. She pointed to the post, before I could protest, so I calmed myself down.

Sighing, I walked back to that part of the hallway, we originally came from.

I blame this all on you, Cathy. If you didn't know how to shush your mouth, chances are we wouldn't have missed it.

"Sorry Marlene, guess my excitement over meeting Desmond, made me miss the room. My bad! Please forgive me."

I nodded, but remained silent. Right now, I tried to find the right words to say, but couldn't find any. My mind just went blank.

Don't know who in the world was this Desmond, since I wasn't listening to her rants. But I figured it must be the guy Catherine met that eventually hooked up with her. Like I care to know that, as love stories don't always last. It's the same thing that happened to me and Owen.

Now I wish she didn't pop up in my life to remind me of him.

***************

"So, here we are Marlene. Let's get some seats so we can sit next to each other, while there are still some empty ones."

I don't think so, lady. I'm hungry as a wolf!

And with a few minutes to spare, I could steal a few cookies from the snack bar.

"Thanks, but I'm going to eat first. I had a long day and needed my energy!"

She smiled back acknowledging that I wanted to leave her side, and as Catherine opened the dented doors for me, the smell of freshly baked donuts and cookies entered my nostrils. I was in heaven, and these snacks were sitting on the table waiting for me!

Seems like someone decided to bring baked goods for the meetup, and couldn't help myself from trying one as these were 100% free!

Food that I don't have to pay for makes me happy!

***************

Inside the old conference room, there were ten seats and two tables. It was rather small and the white walls were a bit rusty from my observation, but it was welcoming, as banners and posters greeted all of us attendees.

On the second table were name tags, the ones where you can write your own names and stick them on your blouse for everyone to see. I grabbed one as I was about to pick a seat that was next to the air conditioner. But before I could claim it, Catherine waved her hand to me. She saved a seat ... next to her.

Dang it! She just won't leave me alone!

But I figured if she went through all that trouble to tell people that seat was reserved for me, I couldn't refuse her invitation. I'm not a rude person.

Imagining that I had another wine glass with me, I raised my hand and murmured, " Well, here's to faking my gleeful face for another hour. Cheers to me!"

Grudgingly, I sat down on the chair that Cathy was patting down and spoke to my seatmate.

"Thank you Cathy, it was really nice of you to reserve a seat for me."

My normal voice sounded a bit off, as I attempted to be excited as she was.

She returned the favor by telling me how happy she was that I agreed to sit by her. Turns out I probably underestimated her early on, as she told me about her vocal problems known as puberphonia. It took a toll on her since she was a teenager, and no matter what she did, there has always been a differentiation of tones in her voice, that many people have often been afraid off.

Thus, I felt sorry for her; many have symptoms and other health problems people are not aware of, yet some people don't give them a chance. And I confess that was what I was doing. Therefore, my mind told me to do the right thing.

Yet, I was still in a miserable state. Here I was, sitting in a room full of alcoholics like myself. With my pessimistic mood, I assumed people might judge me wrongly, but I just couldn't bear to smile. I was just here for my brother, nothing else. I'm not here to make new friends either, so Catherine could cut out her cuteness around me. I decided to cross my legs and place my hands together in my lap to keep myself from becoming impatient.

A middle-aged man with dirty blonde hair stood up from his chair and went to the center of the room. I assumed he was Cathy's brother. And next to him was a brunette woman he held hands with.

My thoughts were then interrupted as the gentleman spoke up. He gestured to all of us to quiet down.

"We will now start, so please settle down." He eyed all eight of us as we now sat in a circular position. Beside him the brunette stood up.

"Hello everyone! Welcome to Wilmington's first Alcoholic Anonymous meeting. I'm Gunther Dawson and this is my lovely wife Bernice. My wife and I started this group for a reason as we were once alcoholics ourselves. But we both became sober after we attended an AA meeting just like this one."

Patting his wife's back, he continued talking, "At that time, we decided to start anew for our new life together, and vowed to stay healthy. So, this is the start of our family business as we also would like to help recovering alcoholics within our community."

I tuned out after that. I feel empathy for the new couple, but I was a bit impatient for this meeting to be over with. Even though this was an introduction, I didn't need to hear unnecessary information. But little did I know Mr. Dawson's eyes were gazing upon mine like my former teacher's strict gaze for not paying attention.

As if I'm being graded for this!

And I didn't anticipate that I would be called upon to be the first to break the icebreaker.

Just my luck!