We found the key easily and let ourselves inside. It was warm compared to the outside weather and smelled of old wood. The floor creaked under our feet as we walked and searched for the light switch.

Melissa and I decided on the downstairs bedroom considering our bodies were too fatigued for stairs. Dad would have to settle for one of those when he got here.

It wasn't until I set my bag down in the bedroom that Melissa approached me.

"You're bleeding," she claimed as she reached up to my head.

There was a throbbing that I hadn't been aware of until she had mentioned it. I figured it had been whatever had fallen on me in the warehouse. Now that the adrenaline of our past situation was wearing off, I could feel the pain in all its glory.

"I'm fine," I lied, hoping it wasn't that serious.

She gave me a frown. "I'll look for a first aid kit."

I watched her disappear into the bathroom as I rolled my eyes. She was such a mom sometimes, but in this situation I found it... cute. Honestly, if she hadn't been around on this trip, I'd probably be dead. What we had just went through confirmed that.

I joined her in the bathroom just as she pulled out a first aid kit from the medicine cabinet and patted the counter.

"Sit," she ordered.

I hopped up and faced her. We were eye-level at this point as I pulled my hair back, making sure she had a good visual of the wound. In the meantime, she wet a washcloth.

She cleaned my head in silence as I watched her. The crease in her brow let me know she was focused on getting the dried blood off my face. I found my eyes trained on her like she was the only thing in existence. Maybe I was just trying to focus on anything other than the nagging pain in my heart.

"What are you thinking?" she whispered without looking up.

It was such a loaded question, mostly because I was thinking about a lot. Where was Anna? Had that man been telling the truth? Had they really known where Paige was? Did I ruin the only opportunity to save my sister? Was I losing my mind because of it? Was Alvin betraying us? Were we fighting a losing battle? Was I ever going to see my sister again? Or would I die before I got the chance?

Would my life ever be normal?

"That man was right," I mumbled. "When he said that I wanted to be the one to kill Paige. It's true."

That's when Melissa's silver eyes caught mine.

I felt like I was on auto-pilot. As if my ability to feel had been stolen. Like I was numb.

"I think I'm losing it," I confessed.

My voice trembled at the end of the sentence. I looked down as Melissa finished wiping the wound with the cloth and started dabbing some alcohol around it.

I closed my eyes at the burning sensation that surrounded the gash. The pain was a nice reminder that I could still feel something, at least physically. That I wasn't completely numb yet.

Melissa dropped the alcohol swab in the trash, then she looked at me. We were close. Like inches apart, considering she had herself wedged between my knees. It was silent between us apart from our breathing.

"You're so used to suppressing your pain..." She unwrapped a bandage. "That you're forgetting how to feel."

I watched her place the bandage on my head.

"You force yourself to be strong when you have every right not to be."

"I have to be strong," I defended. "My sister needs me."

"That doesn't mean you can't hurt, Alexa." Her hands fell but her eyes remained on me. "Let your guard down. Cry. Scream. Beg God for some mercy... You're human. If you keep running from the pain, it'll only hurt worse."

Her words stabbed me in the chest, but in a good way. I knew it was true. She was so right that it hurt. And for the first time, I envisioned a future without my sister.

It would be dark. Every day would feel like the coldest day of winter. The aching in my chest would throb every time I would breathe and it would never go away. I would just get used to the pain. Mom would fall back into her old ways. Dad would probably leave again before he ever really got to come back. Things would fall apart between me and Melissa...

And I would be alone. Like I deserved to be, according to Paige. Hell, maybe she was right.

A shudder ran through my body as I felt tears burn my eyes. I forced myself to look at Melissa, but it only made things worse. I was a walking disaster. Everyone that was close to me got hurt. Melissa and Anna most of all.

I shook my head as a tear fell. "Why do you stay?"

This time I couldn't look at her. I didn't want to see the pity in her eyes. It would only make me feel worse. I didn't want her to feel obligated when she answered my question. I was beginning to think that's exactly what she has been doing all along.

"Well, I thought it was obvious..." Her finger lifted my chin and our gazes met. "Isn't it?"

My skin burned from her touch. It warmed my heart that had been in a permanent state of numbness and cold. The simple gesture melted away just a tiny bit of ice.

"Because you feel obligated." I looked away. "Because you pity me and my screwed-up life..."

"Or because I love you," she whispered.

My eyes switched up and met hers. My breathing hitched in my throat. My cheeks flushed with color. Everything around us seemed to stop.

"I..."

"You don't have to say anything," she interrupted. "I was just answering your question."

Her words kept replaying in my ears, like a song stuck in my head. Melissa loved me? Why? How? When?

She rested her hips against the counter, which brought her closer to me.

"I stay because I love you, Alexa," she repeated. "And I care about very few things in this crazy, messed up world. You happen to be one of them. So, if I have to deal with your lowest low to finally experience your highest high... then I will."

My heart throbbed at her words. It was a throb of something other than pain, and it felt fantastic. Like a drink of cool water after a long trek through the harsh desert.

She took a shaky breath. "Okay, I know I told you not to say anything, but now I'm freaking out so..." Her hands trembled on my thighs. "Please, say something."

My mouth opened and closed. I was at a loss for words, and I think that spoke volumes to her. I watched a smile emerge on her lips. But the look on my face must've screamed "when?".

"I'm not sure when it happened, but..." Her eyes met mine. "It did. And I need you to know I'm not going anywhere."

Almost everyone in my life had abandoned me. My father, my mother, Derik... Even Melissa herself at one point. All the people I had cared about left and betrayed me. And I was twisted up inside because of it.

But Melissa... she had redeemed herself. She had gotten me out of jail, followed me to camp to keep her word to Chapman, saved my life multiple times in the process and agreed to this wild goose chase of a search. She had done it all for me.

Because she loved me.

She reached up and gently pulled out my hair tie. I felt the tickling of my locks fall over my shoulders as my heart throbbed against my chest.

Through all the madness, Melissa had found the ability to make my world stand still.

And after a long moment of silence, I found my voice.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because you're brave," she said. "God, I remember when I first met you... When you, Derik and Willi showed up at my house. You didn't even bat an eye when you talked about breaking into the GIB."

I just looked at her in disbelief.

"And the way you talked about your sister, and your family." She looked down and attempted to hide the red on her cheeks. "Plus, the near-death experiences probably had a lot to do with it, too."

I laughed through the tears in my eyes.

Her hands rested on my knees. "But the one thing I admire most about you is the fact that you never, ever give up."

Our gazes to meet.

"You fight until you win," she finished. "And I know we'll bring Anna home because of that reason alone."

I didn't know what exactly she had said to make the crack in my heart mend, but I took in a deep breath that felt amazing. Like I needed to hear that to find the strength I had lost. I felt as if I had regained part of myself.

And only for a moment did I feel like the old Alexa. The one Melissa had just described.

Melissa leaned in and our lips met. My eyes gently closed at the sensation as I took her in. There was an underlying desperation that I wasn't sure if it was coming from me or her, but it was strong enough to keep us together.

My trembling hands tangled themselves in her long brown hair that hung around her face. I forced myself to focus on the burning trail from her hands that moved from my knees and up my thighs.

I found myself hopping off the bathroom counter and following Melissa back to the bedroom. She didn't know this, but there was more than her admitting to loving me that was fueling my desire.

I believed that once we found my sister, it would either be me or Anna. That Paige, whether she was mentally sick or not, would make me choose once the time came.

And I wouldn't hesitate to save my sister, no matter the cost. Even if it meant losing my own life in the process.

Melissa's shaking hands removed my shirt before I fell back onto the bed. Our lips danced together as my hands roamed over the soft skin of her back, slipping off her shirt in the process.

The hard part about all of this was that it hurt to give in. It pained me to know that there was a very strong possibility I wouldn't be alive much longer, and I would hurt so many people if I died.

I closed my eyes at the sensation of Melissa's full lips pressed against my neck as one of her hands slowly roamed up the inside of my thigh. I could feel the desire. And I could feel how much she loved me, and it made tears threaten to spill.

And suddenly I felt compelled to tell her I loved her too. That, before we went any further, I should tell her the truth. That she wasn't the only one who felt that way in this relationship.

I grabbed her face and held her over me. The world seemed to stop. My heart throbbed as I forced myself to push past all the fear and anxiety swarming around inside.

"I love you, too," I whispered.

A soft smile stretched on her lips before they moved in for mine again. I found some of the weight I had on my chest disappeared when the words left my mouth. And if I did die, at least I would die knowing Melissa knew the truth.

As Melissa moved on top I realized my guard was completely down for the first time in what felt like forever. The feeling of being vulnerable to someone made me feel more alive than the pain or the fear. But I didn't have to be afraid with Melissa, that was one thing I was sure of.

The trail of kisses she was leaving down my chest and stomach caused my heart to pound against my sternum. It felt like I was on fire as her love traveled from her lips and danced over every particle of skin on my body.

Andfor the first time in a long time, I allowed myself to feel something otherthan the aching pain in my chest. Even if it was only for tonight.