Not for the first time, Dean woke up with a scream that rang through and reverberated on the walls of the cold dungeons. He was soaking wet with perspiration as he sat up, his heart thundering inside his chest. Another nightmare, he tried to reassure himself, but how could he, when the nightmare was nothing but a repetition of a fresh, cold memory?

The kind, warm smile of Ted Tonks flashed in front of his eyes, as though he too, was trying to tell him there was nothing to fear about, but then the image was replaced by a flash of green light, and Ted was lying dead at his feet.

Dean could no longer differentiate between day and night as he continued to rot inside the damp dungeons of, what he could guess from the conversations seeping in through the wall, the Malfoy Manor. On the one hand, he was nearly at starving point with the meagre amount of food he was being given, and on the other, he was worried, extremely worried, about his friends he had left behind at Hogwarts.

He did not know where his family was at the moment, and he thought it was better this way. There was nothing he could do sitting in the dungeons all day, so he thought. He thought every now and then about his siblings and his mother, whether they may have been caught and dragged by death eaters to their deaths. He thought about Hogwarts, wondered what was happening there. From the radio, he had heard that Snape was made the headmaster while two death eaters have been appointed as professors in order to keep their eyes on the children. They were the ones who had kidnapped Luna Lovegood, a crazy Ravenclaw girl, and brought her here. She was good company, though most of the time she made no sense.

He had another company in the dimly lit dungeons - Ollivander. He was frail and weak, and Dean helped him remain distracted by encouraging him to tell him all about wandlore. He wasn't sure how much it helped, but he seemed happy to talk about it. There was a goblin too, who mostly remained silent.

Dean also thought of Ginny, remembering their shared kisses at Hogwarts. She was his first kiss, but oddly enough it seemed so distant, as though those memories were from another universe, having been accidentally connected to his own. He worried about her too, though not as much as another person, who was occupying nearly the whole of his mind all day, everyday.

Dean was stupid - infinitely, irreversibly stupid. He had never realised how much Seamus meant to him, how much they cared and felt for each other. Not until the Ministry was taken over and he, being a muggleborn, was forced to run away.

It was out of pure instinct that he had decided to risk a visit to Seamus's house just before leaving. The boy was undeniably shocked at his unexpected appearance, but he had held Dean, comforted him, and told him that when the war and everything was over, he could return to Hogwarts to continue his education, and Seamus would join too, if he wanted. None of them spoke about how much they'd miss each other, for none of them was open enough about their emotions.

But after Dean had left, he had discovered an aching in his heart, a hollow spot at its centre that he did not have when Ginny had dumped him for Harry. He felt like Seamus was the one that had been holding him together in one piece, he was the one who had helped him get over Ginny, helped him survive through Umbridge's torment, helped him go through the stressful Hogwarts years, but now that Hogwarts was taken over by the death eaters, Dean wasn't there to be with Seamus.

It was with much effort that he managed to wipe out the cold, lifeless face of Ted out of his mind, but he couldn't help the image of Seamus appearing in front of him, replaying again and again. His heart broke every time he remembered the way he had looked at him, eyes cloudy, brows creased with worry, how his fingers had clenched his arms in a futile attempt at urging him to stay, how they had loosened helplessly when Seamus had realised that Dean had no choice but to leave.

The days in the dungeons passed in damp monotony, and now Dean had begun to wonder whether he would leave this place at all. His skin crawled each time he thought of what was going on outside, his mind drifting every now and then to Seamus, to Harry, wondering where the Chosen One was, whether he was trying anything to defeat the Dark Lord.

Dean had given up hope, accepted the fact that one day the Malfoys and their pet death eater (who looked oddly like a rat) would forget about him and would stop coming to give him his food, and he would die here, on the cold stone floors, his body fragile and containing only bones and no muscle. He wondered whether Seamus would come looking for him.

He had been so firm at his belief that he would never get out of the dungeons alive, that he was taken by quite a shock when the Chosen One himself arrived there one day with Ron and Hermione. Things passed quickly after that, or maybe it was just him and time playing tricks on him, for he couldn't remember much of what had happened that day, except that there was a house elf who had rescued him from the wretched place. He remembered burying the elf afterwards, who had looked so small and innocent in a sobbing Harry's arms.

He stayed at Bill Weasley's place for the next couple of days, a small cottage by the sea called Shell Cottage. Days later, it was by pure chance that he picked up his DA coin and began to play with it, and a few minutes later, it warmed up. He jerked and dropped the coin, before noticing tiny words written on it.

Hog's Head.

That's where he had to go.

His knees buckled and he stumbled forward as the apparition took away his balance, but he managed to remain upright. With his heartbeat growing faster and louder with each step he took, he finally reached the small pub, and following the gesture of the barman, he went through a square shaped hole leading to a tunnel, which was already occupied by a few other people. He recognised Oliver Wood among them.

He reached the other end of the tunnel what seemed like ages later, and he came upon a large, large, room that he didn't remember ever seeing at Hogwarts. It was milling with people, and he scrunched his eyes as he looked for Seamus among the crowd.

Dean's heart shattered the moment his eyes caught Seamus, who was talking excitedly with Harry. He was standing quite far away, but the several bruises and cuts on his face and arms were visible enough. Without a moment's thought, he stepped toward him.

Seamus looked up at him a second later, and his eyes widened dramatically. Dean couldn't help the choked laughter that escaped his lips, and in the next moment, they collided, neither having realised when they had started running. Dean's voice was hoarse as he questioned him about the scars on his body, about Snape, about the death eaters, about Hogwarts.

Seamus's hand reached up to cover his lips, halting him in mid speech. "I'm fine, Dean. How are you?"

Dean found his heart breaking all over again. There was this boy he'd known for six years, the overly dramatic, the always hyper and always loud boy, endlessly rambling to him about things Dean could rarely figure out. And here he was now, quiet and calm, asking him how are you as though they had met at a park during the weekend, not amidst a war after having been separated for nearly a year.

Maybe this was what wars did to you.

"I'm good," he answered quietly, realising with a jolt how easy it was to say such a blatant lie to the boy he loved, realising that it wasn't just Seamus who had changed. He swallowed nervously, gazing at the scars that trailed down Seamus's cheekbones, his neck, his arms. All those months in hiding and in the dungeons, Dean had fantasised about talking to Seamus again, holding his face in his hands, running his fingers through his sandy hair, maybe kissing him.

But now that he was standing in front of him, all he could do was stare.

"We have to fight now," said Seamus, his voice determined and confident. "Harry's here. He says he knows how to defeat You-Know-Who. There's going to be a war. And we fight."

Dean nodded mutely. Almost impulsively, he cupped his hands around Seamus's face and drew him into a kiss. It wasn't a very long one, for both were aware of the people around them, but Dean enjoyed those brief moments of their foreheads touching, Seamus's hands over his arms, his plump lips moving against his. And then he pulled away.

"Yes," he said in a determined voice that surprised even him. "We fight."

✓

the title is so original amirite ^^^