The biggest difference in the way Chrissie and Brian handled their personal issues and the way Roger and I handled ours, was the fact that up to this point; Chrissie and Brian hadn’t had any issues. They had absolutely no idea how to talk to one another about anything that may cause discord. This is what happens when the two gentlest people in the world collide. They were two people who wore their hearts on their sleeve and had no idea how to fathom something in their lives actually running haywire. Roger and I, however kept our hearts locked tightly away in a highly explosive box and that box was always triggered with horrible timing and in the most vivid of explosions.

 “Chrissie…Chrissie…please…please just…listen for a moment.” Brian begged of her as the two of them sat on the edge of the bed. She appeared as if her entire world had just collapsed. Her face was already streaked with tears. She looked toward Brian.

 “I…I didn’t fuck anyone.” He reached for her hand and Chrissie willingly interlaced her shaking fingers with Brian’s. She didn’t say anything, instead waited on Brian to give her more details.  “I…I came on to…to someone last night. I was very forward with her. Chrissie, I was so piss-ass drunk and…”

 “Who was it? Brian, you were with me nearly all night!? How the hell could…Jesus, shit! Who was it?” Chrissie begged him.

 “Okay…okay now this is the part that’s….very hard to tell you. Chrissie…I…it…” Brian struggled to find the words to tell her this. “Chrissie…” he knew he could do this in one quick breath. “I…came on very strongly to one of your dearest friends…”

 “Oh Lydia, would you just look at this! Okay! Okay, now you and Roger stand over there! I want your picture! And then you take John and I!” Veronica insisted. She had already taken a Polaroid of Freddie and Mary and now it was mine and Roger’s turn to fall victim to her camera. We didn’t argue too much, after all….she was our official post-wedding photographer. Veronica and Chrissie were a nervous wreck to get on these slopes and it showed because they were both as fidgety as hell. We were all at the top, equipped and ready to go. Even Freddie was a little gun-shy as he babbled incessantly. It was a truly marvelous view from up here. There were nine lanes on the slopes, each of them varying slightly in degree of slope and amount of snow.

 “Have you done this before?” John asked of Roger.

 “No.” he answered John as if it were no big deal whatsoever.

 “You’ve never skied!?” John asked, rather shocked. Roger shook his head.

 “No, when would I have even done that?” he questioned.

 “I don’t know! It’s just…you look and act like you’ve done this!” John argued, feeling a little flustered himself.

 “Well, I looked and acted like I had tasted coffee that one time when we were in America but I was bullshittin’ everyone! Come on, John!” Roger rolled his eyes.

 “You two seem a little apprehensive. Would you like to go down in the sled?” the man coordinating who went down which lane of the slope asked of Veronica and Mary.

 “YES!” they both exclaimed in near unison. And with that, the man began to prepare the sled for them so they wouldn’t have to brave the ski’s.

 “Okay, so you’re going down with Roger?” John asked of me.

 “No, he’s goin’ down with Freddie, They are gonna’ be in that second lane. Freddie insisted on it because the snow is packed tighter. The guy back here says you go faster there. You’re with me, obviously because these two are wimping our and getting in the sled.

 “And have you done this?” John asked of me as Freddie and Roger got a plan together.

 “A few times, yes.” John gave me a big smile, it seemed to settle him a bit.

 “Good, ‘cause I’ve never done this kinda’ thing before.” He said.

 “I’m so very sorry Chrissie…I’ve never done this kinda’ thing before…and it’s not…it’s not you an’ me. I love you.” Brian tried to convince her, his voice was soft and kind. Chrissie still had a look of disbelief across her face.

 “You…you tried to…to sleep with…” Chrissie covered her mouth as she felt the tears well up. “Whyyyyyy?” she sobbed uncontrollably, as a small child. “Why…why would you do this?” she whined.

 “Jesus…I can’t see you like this….shit…” Brian mumbled, blinked a few times to fight his own tears and reached out for her. He held Chrissie up against him. “That’s what we need to talk about. I love you but I feel like I’m constantly disappointing you.”

 “What!?” Chrissie looked up to him, trying to dry her eyes. “Brian, you’re not a disappointment to me! You’ve never disappointed me and you’ve always given me anything I ever wanted.” She sniffed.

 “That’s my point. All you’ve talked about is wanting a baby…and we don’t yet have one.” Brian reminded her.  Chrissie thought about that comment for a moment.

 “Are you saying you don’t want a child anymore?” she wept. Brian shook his head.

 “It’s not what I’m saying at all. We talked about this before…that we felt like we were in the right place to start our family but…I feel like you’re a hundred miles away from me.” Brian reached up, touching the back of his wrist to his eye. Chrissie shifted her focus to the comforter on the bed as she sulked in Brian’s arms.

 “Why?” she asked, not completely understanding.

 “Because of the tour, I haven’t been around to pay attention to you. And when I have been home with you the only thing we’ve actually discussed is babies. You haven’t once told me anythin’ about you or asked nothin’ about me. You haven’t touched me except for when…except for when you need to…so to speak. I can’t take it…I’m sorry, I really am but I just can’t take it.” Never before in their marriage, had Brian been so candid with Chrissie…or course, he never had to be. However, they had reached the point where it was quite real and glaring. Chrissie was silent as she digested this information. Part of her hated to admit that Brian was right and the other part of her hated to admit that even she herself had recently viewed her marriage as a chore and a duty…she hated herself for it.

 “Oh my god! I’m going to hate myself for this!” John said, gripping his ski poles with deathly force.

 “No, you won’t! C’mon, you ready? You an’ me. Let’s do this, John!” I encouraged him. The man coordinating the slope lanes was sending us down first. I looked back to Roger, then to Freddie and finally to Mary and Veronica all huddled close together on the sled…Mary in front…Veronica in back and her arms slung around Mary. God, they were like two five year olds and I loved it.

 “Freddie, you simply must get Veronica’s camera and take a picture of that!” I told him.

 “ ‘On’t  ‘ou  ‘orry, ‘ydia! I ‘o’nt ‘iss ‘at!” Freddie mumbled his words to me from behind his scarf. I’m assuming that it somehow meant that he wouldn’t miss that moment since he was slowly and awkwardly moving toward them with his ski’s. I thought sure as hell he was going to plow Roger and the slope staff over.

 “Go when you see the green light!” one of the staff members yelled to John and I. I gave John a look, raising my eyebrows at him before pulling my scarf toward my nose.

 “Direct with your hips. You’ll get used to it after the third time or so.” I gave John a nod.

 “Oh, darling, please. That’s what she said.” Freddie grinned, having pulled his scarf away from his face. He was, of course, referring to Veronica. I rolled my eyes as he insisted on taking mine and John’s picture. We didn’t have much time before the light changed.

 “John, I love you! I’ll see you at the bottom!” Veronica blew him a mitten-covered kiss. He reached a hand up and caught it. Once again, I rolled my eyes feeling partially nauseated by such a gesture…but shit it was so them. The tone sounded and a light turned green. John and I lunged forward slightly, letting gravity begin to do the work for us.

 Brian had pulled a chair up to the middle of the floor of their resort room, sitting across from her while she remained at the edge of the bed and still fully dressed for the ski outing that they had missed.

 “How long have you felt that way?” she asked, her tone very defeated. Brian shrugged and shook his head slightly.

 “Since we started tryin’. So, a couple months. It’s only coming up now because, Chrissie this is going to get worse and we are going to resent one another if we don’t fix it now.” He said logically. Chrissie shook her head and finally made eye contact.

 “Oh god…Brian...I…” Chrissie stopped for a moment. She wasn’t feeling sorry for herself and she wasn’t torn apart as she initially was.  “…and she…she didn’t even offer to…” Brian stopped her.

 “No. You really have a good friend there.” Brian said. They were quiet again. “Chrissie, I need to feel your touch the way I used to feel it. I need to know that you still love me the way you loved me only a few months ago.” He confessed.

 “I do. I do still love you the same. I’m guilty of neglecting your feelings…and you…and me.” She started to tear up. “They warned me. They warned me and I didn’t listen.”

 There was no funnier sight than Mary and Veronica coming down the slope and screaming their heads off alternately the entire way down. In fact, I rank it in my top ten funniest things I’d seen…and please believe me…I’d seen some funny things in my lifetime. Veronica was squeezing the hell out of Mary as they slid down. Mary alternated with her shrieks of both fear and laughter.

 “MARY! OH MY GOD!” Veronica yelled.

 “I KNOW!” Mary yelled back. Veronica gripped her harder the closer to the bottom of the slope they got. She practically deafened Mary with her scream as they barely missed a collision with a lane marker.

 “OH MY GOD! STEER! STEER THIS DAMN THING!” Mary laughed at Veronica, wildly.

 “I DON’T FUCKIN’ KNOW HOW!” she said through her laughter and trying to avoid peeing her pants. They continued their antics as they approached the bottom on the slope. John and I had completed our first run very well if I do say so myself.  Roger and Freddie hadn’t yet begun their run.

 Veronica was laughing almost as hard as Mary as they came to a stop, quite proud that they had made it in one piece. “My god! You can let go of me!” she said to Veronica through her incessant laughter.  She was still squeezing Mary.

 “Veronica and Lydia cautioned me. They said I was approaching it all wrong. In fact, Veronica said I was makin’ a monumental mistake. I…I looked down upon Lydia rather condescendingly…I mean judged her for…for…” she started to tear up again. “…for marryin’ Roger. She…she said my physical and emotional neglect of you was…going to turn you into a cheatin’ man. She was right…” Chrissie paused. “Brian, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for bein’ such a shitty, selfish wife.” The tears began to stream down her face again.

 “Ssshhhh….Chrissie…Chrissie, sweetheart. You’re not a shitty wife. You and I have had needs we’ve each pushed away. I haven’t paid you the kind of attention you need and…” she interrupted Brian.

 “And I haven’t been available to you. Recently, I’ve only wanted you for one thing and since it hasn’t yet happened, I haven’t cared about you or us…I’ve cared about getting pregnant. What a selfish thing to do. Brian, I didn’t even ask you how the last leg of the tour went when you got home.” She confessed. Chrissie wiped her eyes dry again.

 “But I didn’t offer to tell you about it. I didn’t think you wanted to hear anything about it. I was already thinkin’ then…that…” Brian had a sickened look on his face. “…I was regretting not fuckin’ someone on tour…because it…it coulda’ just been left on tour and forgotten and out of my system.“ Brian confessed.

 “It doesn’t always get left on tour. My god, look at Lydia! Look at what she’s dealt with, shit!” Chrissie admitted. She was quiet for a moment. “Oh god…I have a true friend in her. Had it been anyone else…” she didn’t finish the sentence because she knew how it would end. “Shit…” Chrissie had to take a moment to understand and digest how one-sided her and Brian’s relationship had recently been; how trying to get pregnant, had physically and emotionally run the loving couple they were right downhill.

 “Come on Roger! It’s all downhill from here!” Freddie semi-yelled, having pulled his scarf below his chin.  Myself, Veronica, Mary and John watched as they looked completely ridiculous trying to stay in their lane. Freddie continuously got very close to Roger and they were both gaining a lot of speed; far more than John and I had accumulated.

 “I can’t decide if they look like Olympians or an old married couple that fights a lot.” Mary leaned over and told me. I laughed at her.

 “Oh, it’s the second one.” The truth was, we all wanted to get on the lift to get our spot for the second run instead of wait for these two to pass the final lane markers…but we were nice friends, unfortunately. They continued to gain more speed the closer to the end of the slope they got. Freddie, nearly losing control of his ski’s cut in front of Roger and nearly missed one of the lane markers. Naturally, Roger gave him a good cussing but looking sideways at Freddie and not paying attention to the last of three lane markers proved to be a horrible mistake. Roger hit the pole only a few meters from the bottom and went down into the snow.

 “Oh my god! He hit that!” John said, rather shocked. “Damn it! He hit that dead on!” Freddie, quite pleased with himself  and also having no idea how to stop himself on these skis; thumped into John and I to break his glide.

 “That was marvelous! And wasn’t I marvelous!? Mary! Did you see that!? Wasn’t that just spectacular! My god! I’m like a fucking snow devil only with twice the sin!” Freddie laughed, so very pleased with himself. John had a very concerned look on his face.

 “Um, Fred? Roger hasn’t gotten up yet.”

 “Huh? Oh! That? John, please! He’ll be fine. God, I cut off his path and he gets all dramatic on us.” Freddie rolled his eyes as he looked behind him. “Come on Mary! Let’s all get back on the lift!”

 “Alright! But, Freddie…he’s not movin’ at all…Lydia, Lydia he’s not moving at all.” Mary said, a look of confusion covering her face. I looked to Freddie and then to Mary. Freddie liked to talk big but he appeared anxious as he spun around to see Roger laying there motionless in the snow on his left side.

 Chrissie shook her head. “I wanna’ let it happen naturally…and whenever it’s intended…getting pregnant, I mean. I want my husband back. I want us back. I miss seein’ you smile and puttin’ my arms around you. I miss diggin’ my hands into your hair and I miss you holdin’ me in your arms.” Chrissie smiled all over, in utmost sincerity. “I want you and I to be happy again. Whatever it takes. I want us to talk the way we used to, to laugh and to…be all over each other. I don’t want to look as us a duty anymore. I’ll do whatever it takes.” She insisted. “Oh shit…I’m sorry, Brian. I’m sorry.

 “There’s nothing to do…you don’t have to do anything. I just needed to tell you so much so that you and I could get back on track before a complete derailment.” Brian put his palm on her blotchy cheek. For the first time in a little over a month, she felt Brian in a way in which she had grown unfamiliar: she could feel his heart beat again. The truth was, their relationship had grown temporarily cold…had Chrissie already gotten pregnant it would have been in the least romantic of ways. For someone simply adored romance; that was a miserable thought.

 “Okay…okay it’s been maybe two minutes and he hasn’t moved.” Veronica whispered to John. I had been very quiet up until right now and then…I snapped.

 "ROGER!" I didn't even know my voice could get that high or that loud as I shrieked in horror. I knew something wasn’t right. "ROGER!" I shrieked again and pushed past some scattered people watching him carefully. I pulled my boots from my skis and left them aside for now.

 I awkwardly ran somewhat up, somewhat sideways and mostly all over the place as I tackled making my way around the bottom of this damn slope. I wasn't gaining headway at all and was slipping under my feet. I didn't give a shit if any of these other skiers hit me or not. "ROGER!" I yelled at him again as I got closer. I staggered and tripped and was gasping for breath as I myself, fell at Roger's side, grabbing the shoulders of his coat and laying him on his back. I was practically on top of him and I could feel the tears starting to streak down my face. It wasn’t like me at all to get emotional in public like this.

 "Roger!" My voice was half cracking through my tears as I smacked the hell out of his cheek and pulled the scarf away from his face. Don't ask why, it seemed to be the right thing to do. "Roger...."I whined. And then...slowly, very slowly...those big blue eyes met mine. "Roger..." I uttered half smiling, half weepy. He didn't say anything, he just blinked slowly a couple of times at me.

 "Lyd…why are you slappin' the shit outta my face?" Roger finally said groggily and a little slurred. I sniffed between my tears.

 "To get you to wake up!" I said, cupping his cheeks in my palms.

 "What the hell you mean?" Roger asked of me.

 "Baby! You're layin' on the ski slope! You hit the fuckin' flag!" I said a little too emotionally.

 "What the hell!? Now, why would I do that?" He asked, his voice getting all high in nature.

 "Because you were talkin' to Fred and not paying attention, you stupid arse!" I scolded him. "God! You've been layin' here motionless for at least four or five minutes now! Scared the fuckin' shit outta me, Roger!" I started to cry.

 "Hey, hey! Why you cryin'? You only cry when somethin's really wrong or when you really love somethin…and why's my head hurt so much?" He questioned.

 "Because! You hit it hard!" I was still crying rather hysterically now. Roger looked strangely at me.

 "Well, you don't gotta yell!" Roger said back, firmly.

 “I can hear her voice, I hear her…he’s okay…he’s okay…oooh shit…FREDDIE!” Mary smacked the hell our of Freddie’s arm and at the same time leaned up against him.

 “I can’t help it that he’s uncoordinated!” Freddie said, kissing Mary firmly.

 "I do too gotta yell! Damn it, I love you Roger and you're my very best friend. You’re my best friend in the whole fuckin’ world! You've only been my stupid husband for three fuckin' days and I can't have you knocked out cold on a ski slope! I don't know what I would ever do without you!" I practically screamed at him. Oh god, I was hyper emotional and a beyond embarrassed for myself. I hated it when I got this way.

 "Yes! I know I'm your stupid husband and what do you mean I'm your best friend? You've never told me that before!" Roger asked me just as emotionally, putting his arms around me.

 "It's true...you are!" I whimpered as he wiped my face with his gloves. Everyone else around us could hear all this emotional yelling. Oh god...it was getting worse.

 "Well, you're my best friend too, Lyd!  I’ve told you so much and always wanna’ be able to tell you anything! I love you so much that I bought you a three and a half carat diamond but it's not ready yet! It was supposed to be a fuckin’ surprise but it's been delayed three damn times! I designed it myself! I know how much you hate engagement rings so this this is just a surprise I love you, diamond!" Roger confessed to me. I was entirely awestruck. I never asked for a diamond. Not once. Not even hinted that I even wanted one.

 "My god, sweetheart! I'll wear it forever, but I never asked for it." I still had tears in my eyes.

 "I know you didn't but you didn't ask for herpes or syphillis either and you got 'em!"

 "Roger! This is a five star ski resort! Don't let people hear your say herpes!" I said through my tears.

 "Oh, sorry!" He answered, pulling my lips into his.

 "They are gonna' be married for 110 years.” Mary said to Veronica.

"Roger, last night Brian came on to me! He put his hand up my dress, but please don't kill 'im!" I desperately confessed.

 "Now that was a shitty thing to do! Why the hell'd he do that for!? I'm gonna' kick his fuckin' arse!" Roger said.

 "Oh...better make it 111 years." Veronica said.

 “Oh my god! What is she talking about!?” Mary asked, wide eyed.

 “I’ll tell you about it on the lift.” Veronica shook her head.

 “For fuck’s sake, darling. Please…oh for the love of god…please tell me too!” Freddie gave Veronica a wink.

 "Because! He fucked up and he an' Chrissie are tryin' to have a baby and it's complicated, stressful for them! All Chrissie can think about is sperm!" I said, as my tears started to dry.

 "Lyd! Don't say sperm so loudly!"

 "You said syphillis just as loudly!" I said.

 "I love you." Roger said, still holding on to me.

 "I love you too, sweetheart." I said emphatically.

 "Those are some seriously fucked up marriage vows." Mary said.

 "They are…but they’re very real ones." Veronica laughed, which of course made John laugh because to him; Veronica’s laughter was poison in his veins.

 “Shut up! Tell me! Tell me now, dammit! So, Brian came on to Lydia, huh?” Freddie insisted for more details.

 Oh yes, Brian came all right. In fact, he and Chrissie were enveloped in burgundy sheets and sweating like they had never sweat before. The hair stuck to his forehead and Chrissie literally had sweaty beads on her temples. She was still white knuckled as her trembling palms clenched Brian’s sweaty shoulders. She couldn’t catch her breath, her face was blotchy pink and Brian’s moisture-soaked, liquid-slicked body was slowly sinking in to her. She could feel Brian’s heart pound against her chest. She could feel heat running down her inner thigh. Chrissie wasn’t certain if it were sweat from her own body…or something else. Her legs were weak and the rest of her body limp. Their heated and out of control breaths had finally returned to normal as Chrissie shoved deep, brown curls away from Brian’s face. They didn’t need any further words. They had said everything they needed to say and at least for the next couple hours…they had felt exactly what they needed to feel.