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Chapter 18: Deep Breaths


Suthe awoke with a start. Her dreams had been filled with women-warriors using arrows as swords to duel a faceless king and Calatar tinkering with metal machines shaped like men, with eyes that glowed as red as the inventor's hair. She found that the nightmare had dimmed her curiosity of clockwork soldiers a bit.

Blinking away the memory, Suthe glanced up to the small window above her. A soft golden light was just creeping through a crack in the curtains and illuminating the dust motes that floated through the otherwise-still room.

Suthe turned on the sleeping platform, wincing at the soreness in her muscles. She must have become too accustomed to the stuffed mattresses in Sylterra. Here, the few padded blankets that Nem Koel had provided were not enough to cushion the hardness of the wood beneath.

"Ulsper—" Suthe broke off when she realized the spy was not in the corner where she had last seen him. She tried to ignore the jolt of panic that shot to her stomach at the realization, but the thought of being alone again, in yet another foreign land, still had her throwing off her blanket and jumping to her feet. Has something bad happened? Did General Yenh betray us, after all?

She couldn't seem to jam her feet into her boots fast enough. The laces fumbled in her fingers, and she finally just tucked them inside each shoe before racing to the other side of the room, stumbling a bit at the looseness in her steps.

Suthe took a breath and cracked open the door. The small hallway outside was empty, and she strained to hear anything beyond the silence ringing in her ears. Somewhere outside, there was the rumbling of a wooden cart, but inside, the air was still and undisturbed.

Creeping down the hall, Suthe tried to breathe as silently as possible and not let the wooden floor creak too loudly beneath her steps. When she opened the door to peer out into the main area, however, there were no bodies or broken-in doors that awaited her. The two long tables were still there, surrounded by the dusty carpets on the floor and the greenery hanging from the rafters.

Hesitantly, Suthe stepped out, careful to keep in the shadows of the balcony of the upper floor. She followed along the perimeter of the room, trailing her hand along the wall for guidance as she went. The light was only just starting to trickle through the windows in the roof, and it was still difficult to see clearly.

Her fingers bumped over a wooden frame, and Suthe paused. Something wasn't right.

She turned to the wall, peering through the dim light at the watercolor painting of an Andilirish harbor beneath her fingertips. Boats with crooked sails and rough wooden piers dotted with people undulated in her vision like the waves of the ocean. Things were starting to get blurry at the edges of the image, and it seemed like the longer she stared, the dizzier she became. It was just like when—

Suthe yanked her hand back with a gasp and stumbled out from beneath the shelter of the second-floor balcony. She had almost disappeared again, and she hadn't even been thinking about it, that time!

Shaken, she clutched her hand to her chest.

"Is everything all right?"

Suthe whirled around, only to nearly smack into a leather jacket. She recoiled with a yelp and looked up, only to realize that the jacket was Ulsper's, with him in it.

He frowned down at her. "Is something wrong?" His eyes flicked down to the hand she cradled. Not wanting to expose her concerns, Suthe immediately dropped the traitorous limb to her side and went on the offensive.

"Don't sneak up on me like that!" she snapped. "Where did you go, anyway? We aren't supposed to leave this place until Nem Koel or the general says it's safe, right? Just because you're a spy doesn't mean you have the right to—"

"I was only looking out the window," Ulsper calmly answered, pointing up and back to the single window that looked out over the courtyard from the second-floor balcony.

"Ah—oh," Suthe said, suddenly feeling foolish. She looked down, then to the side, anywhere but to meet his eyes, and all the while wishing for a distraction.

Her wish was granted. The front door opened just then, and Nem Koel stepped inside, followed by a woman about General Yenh's age. Suthe breathed a sigh of relief, but sensed Ulsper tense beside her.

"General Yenh said she might be able to stop by tomorrow," Nem Koel announced, her gaze flickering between Suthe and Ulsper with some curiosity. Suthe took a step back, just to be safe.

"This is Saer Lon Ongtu, the general's sister-in-law," Nem Koel continued, indicating the woman beside her. Suthe noticed Ulsper's stance relax just slightly at the woman's introduction.

Nem Koel turned and spoke to Saer Lon in Shun Dwo; just as when Ulsper had been talking with the general the day before, Suthe caught her name mentioned. Introductions again.

The introductions, however, were not enough to remove the sullen look from Saer Lon's face. The woman crossed her arms and raised a brow at the two visitors standing across from her. Suthe shot a worried look at Ulsper. Would she kick them out?

Saer Lon muttered a single syllable—it sounded like a dismissal—and then turned for the shelf of ceramic bottles. Suthe noticed Ulsper exchange a glance with Nem Koel, who merely shrugged.

"So, can we stay?" Suthe asked.

"For now," Ulsper replied, his gaze still on Saer Lon as she made her way to the staircase at the back of the building, now with a bottle in hand.

Nem Koel turned to Suthe. "Come on," she said. "You wanted to learn some meditation, right?"

"Well—" before Suthe could protest, or even ask what Saer Lon's comment had been, Nem Koel had taken Suthe's hand and guided her to one of the tables in the middle of the room.

"So General Yenh told me—is it really true that you're a druith?" Nem Koel asked, ushering Suthe onto the bench and sitting down across from her.

Suthe shot a glance in Ulsper's direction. He had told the general what she was?

"Not a very good one," Suthe admitted, twisting her fingers together on the table in front of her. Talking about her magical traits made her nervous—she had never spoken so openly about them before, even with her mother. There was always the risk of being overheard by the wrong person.

"So what can you do?" Nem Koel pressed.

"I don't really know," Suthe admitted. "Sometimes I appear elsewhere, but I've heard that others can do different things, so maybe I can too, with practice. I tried to do some research, but there's not much on it—only something about three instinctual abilities." Suthe shrugged and looked over her shoulder to Ulsper. The spy was still watching Saer Lon as she walked along the balcony. Once the woman disappeared into one of the upper rooms, he leaned back against a pillar and took a knife from his belt. The early morning light glinted along the blade as he gave it a few practice twirls.

Suthe turned back to Nem Koel. "My, uh, skills can be a bit unpredictable though. Ulsper thinks meditation could help me manage them better."

Nem Koel straightened up. "Right! Well, for now we can start out with just the beginner techniques and see if anything like that helps."

Suthe nodded. "Sounds good." She caught her gaze turning to Ulsper again, but he wasn't paying attention to them. Instead, he was stepping forward with the blade in his hand, practicing some kind of dueling technique.

"Could I ask you something?" Suthe asked, turning back to Nem Koel.

The girl looked surprised. "Of course."

"Are other countries as wary of druiths as Montmyth is?" Suthe asked. "It's just—you seem more intrigued than frightened of me. And Ulsper doesn't seem to mind either."

Nem Koel smiled. "I think it's because we don't have anyone with magic in Andilir or Sylterra," she replied. "Montmyth is afraid of your kind because you're more real to them. There could be hundreds of you and they wouldn't know, and I think that scares them. But here in Andilir, at least, we don't have to worry about someone suddenly using magic against us. I've always heard of druiths spoken as more of a fairytale than fact."

"Like the Dragon Swords," Suthe said, and Nem Koel frowned.

"The what?"

What had Alaera called them? "The...Twin Blades? Isn't that why Andilir and Montmyth are getting ready to fight one another?" After a moment, she added, "And Sylterra, too?"

Recognition flashed in Nem Koel's eyes. "Oh! Yes. Everyone thought they were a myth until that historian found those papers. From some old captain's log, or something."

"Right..."

Nem Koel wiggled her brows. "See? You're a legend!"

Suthe couldn't help but laugh at that. "Well, when you put it that way..."

Her laughter trailed off, and the sound of Ulsper's practice reached her ears in the relative silence that followed.

Practice. Right.

Here she was, laughing as though she hadn't a care in the land. But she needed to find a way to get back home, and if Ulsper thought the meditation would help with that, then she should focus.

"So what's the first lesson?" Suthe asked, casting another apprehensive glance Ulsper's way. To her relief, he still wasn't looking in their direction—she knew it was silly, but she couldn't help but felt a little self-conscious in his presence. Maybe it was because he was so sure of what he could do, with his knife-flipping and roof-jumping and whatever else his spy skills consisted of—while she was afraid of the slightest slip-up with her own magical talents.

At least I can bake the best cake this side of the Pretian Mountains.

Suthe straightened her posture at the thought. She should have more confidence in herself.

Nem Koel hummed in thought. "I guess we could start with your breathing, then move on to balance and later focusing your thoughts."

"Okay. So...what should I do?"

"Close your eyes," Nem Koel instructed as she closed her own. Hesitantly, Suthe copied her. "Now...breathe in through your nose, counting to five." Suthe did, but perhaps it was too quickly, because Nem Koel still hadn't said what to do next.

Holding her breath, Suthe cracked open an eye to glance across the table at Nem Koel. The girl was a model of serenity, sitting calm and composed on her bench. Suthe's bench, meanwhile, was starting to become uncomfortable, and she tried to shift so that she wouldn't feel so sore.

"Now exhale slowly, counting again to five," Nem Koel continued, and Suthe froze mid-wiggle, shutting her eyes again and letting out her breath, but forgetting to go slowly.

Wincing, she cracked open her eyes again. Was there a cushion or something she could use?

"Now, inhale again, and this time focus on your posture. Make sure to your stomach stays flat and your ribs expand..."

Speaking of stomachs...Suthe looked around sadly. She hadn't eaten since Ulsper's small gift of almonds the day before, and she was hungry. But there was no food on the table, or the shelf with the bottles. Was there any food at all in this place, she wondered.

She curled forward, letting out a sigh despite Nem Koel's instructions to breathe in. What she would give to be back at the bakery...

A shadow fell over her, then, and Suthe looked up to see that Ulsper had approached their table. She immediately straightened her posture, a surprised sound squeaking from the back of her throat. Nem Koel cracked open an eye at the sound, and Suthe quickly closed both of hers, not wanting to look like she hadn't been paying attention to the training.

"I was thinking it might be nice to take a break and eat something," Suthe heard Ulsper suggest. Slowly, she reopened her eyes.

"I think that would be a good idea," Suthe said, trying not to sound too eager. She took Ulsper's interruption as an opportunity to stand up from the hard bench and stretch. "What can we eat?"

"All right," Nem Koel said, standing up as well. "I guess I'm a bit hungry as well. I'll go get something."

Suthe thought back on the book she had left in Alaera's apartment in Choraport. "Are there any star cakes?" Or maybe the red bean paste buns?

Nem Koel gave a short laugh. "We can't afford anything that fancy. But I can buy some smoked fish from one of the vendors outside and cook some rice."

Fancy? Suthe hadn't thought of cake as being expensive, but then, Fai did come across as a bit impoverished with the majority of its population made up of miners and footsoldiers. And the star cakes recipe did call for sugar powder, which was difficult to get in Crestdune at least.

"That sounds good, thank you Nem Koel," Ulsper said.

Suthe nodded in agreement. She would eat almost anything at this rate.

"And...the restroom?" she added, a bit timidly.

Nem Koel inclined her head in the direction of one of the doors beside them.

"Thanks!" Suthe was about to leave, but a question from Ulsper made her pause.

"How long does she stay up there?" the spy asked Nem Koel. Suthe turned back to see his gaze directed at the room Saer Lon had disappeared into.

"Er, sometimes all day," Nem Koel answered. "But she doesn't really like to be distur—"

Ulsper was already striding towards the stairs at the back of the building, disregarding Nem Koel's warning.

Suthe froze. He can't be serious.

Nem Koel ran after Ulsper, jumping in front of the spy and throwing out her hands to block him just before he got to the foot of the staircase.

"You can't just barge in there!" Nem Koel protested. Suthe hurried to catch up to them and grabbed Ulsper's arm. The spy turned to her.

"Let go, Suthe," he said, gently.

"What if she gets angry and kicks us out?" Suthe asked, ignoring his request. "Why don't you just wait until the general gets here?" Saer Lon's glare from earlier was still fresh in her memory.

"If Seolosu can't visit until tomorrow, I might as well speak with her sister-in-law," Ulsper said. "The longer we stay here, the more time we give for the Imperial Guard to find us or the countries to find out more about these swords. I'm just going to find out if she has any information."

Nem Koel adjusted her stance—Suthe didn't have much experience with sparring, but it looked like the girl was getting ready for a fight.

"You're not going in there," Nem Koel said, gaze hardened. "You need to wait for the general."

A tense moment passed, and Suthe found herself holding her breath again, just like during the meditation lesson earlier. Finally, Ulsper stepped back, and Suthe loosened her grip as he stepped out of her reach.

"You're right," he said. "We should wait."

The relief was evident on Nem Koel's face. "Okay, let me just go get breakfast and I'll be right back."

"Would you bring some roasted chestnuts as well?" Ulsper asked. Suthe nervously followed him back to the tables, where he sat down at a bench and clasped his hands together. "I haven't tasted them in a while."

Nem Koel nodded. "Yeah, I'll see if I can find a vendor selling some. They aren't too popular this time of the year, though."

"Thank you," Ulsper said.

With a last backward glance, Nem Koel headed for the door. It closed with a heavy finality after her, leaving Suthe alone with Ulsper in the silence that followed.

A heartbeat passed, and the spy stood back up.

"Uh...Ulsper?" Suthe began, worry shooting through her as she realized he was again heading for the stairs. "Where are you—"

"Like I said before, we don't have any time to waste," Ulsper interrupted, briefly leaning over the bannister to look at her before continuing his ascent. "I need to speak with Saer Lon."

I'm baaaaack!  For now.  Continuing with the character inspiration photos, the above is one of the many different pictures I have for an general idea of Calatar (since he was briefly mentioned at the beginning of this chapter, I decided to focus on him this time).  I chose David Oakes to represent Calatar in the trailer, but Eddie Redmayne is also a good choice.  ^_^   Thanks for reading!  

Chapter dedication to mowitz for voting and commenting and bringing my attention back to how much I've been neglecting my stories and Wattpad lately.  >.<

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