.
.
.
.

Six months later.....

„Leave it my child , I'll handle it! It's too heavy for you!"

„Grandma ! I can do it."

„No! The doctor said you shouldn't take any risks and take it easy!"

I rolled my eyes and sighed smiling.

„Get some rest Kid!" she patted my head and took the heavy bucket from my hands. I sat down on the steps of my grandma's little house and nibbled on my raffish stick. The last few month were not easy,but I blossomed a little and became more cheerful.

„When do you have to go for your next check up Joy?"

„Tomorrow."

Grandma sat down next to me and sighed. I leaned my head on her shoulder and she kissed the top of my head.

„I know you don't want to hear it sweetie , but..!"

„Grandma please don't!"

„You have to tell both of them!" I lifted my head and I knew she was right . „You'll regret it later Joy!"

I stood up and crossed my arms in front of me . I knew she was right. But it had been six month . Surely they are both over me and living their lives. Grandma also stood up and hugged me.

„At least call Jimin. He should be the first to know.hmm?" she took my face in her palms and kissed my forehead.

„As long as I don't know wich one of them is the father , I won't say anything!" I stroked over my little baby bump.

„You Are really dumb!"she looked at me a bit angrily.

„Grandma?!" she never spoke to me like that.

„Damn it Joy, go back to Seoul and get your messed up life back together instead of wallowing in self-pity here. Aigooooo...!" she waved with her arms and turned around.

„But Grandma..I...!"

„Go back to Seoul Joy!"

„Do you really want me to go back?"

„Yes, I feel sorry for the two guys you blame . You were not entirely innocent. Go back!"

My grandmother was right. I should face my responsibility and get my life together. After all I am going to be a mother and my child has the right to know who his father is. I didn't plan to stay in Seoul for long. If I don't get everything in order within two weeks , I'll go back to my grandmother.

.................

It was a warm spring day and I was sitting in this little park in the middle of Seoul. I was staring at the display of my phone , Jimins phone number we're looking at me.

„What if he doesn't want to talk to me anymore?" I stroked over my baby belly „oh little bunny, what are we going to do?" I gathered all my courage and pressed the call button. I was so excited, felt my pulse beating against my neck.

„Yes?!" I heard his voice on the other end and was unable to answer at first.

„Hello ? Who is it?" 

I cleared my throat.." Jimin?" I stammered.

„Yes?"

„Well, I...it's me...Joy!" I heaved a sigh of relief.

„Oh my gosh Babygirl? How are you? Where are you?" he sounded happy , taking away my uncertainty. 

I told him that I was in Seoul and needed to talk to him urgently. We agreed on a meeting place the same day.

I was sitting in that cage where we going to meet and I was so excited. How will he react when he sees that I am pregnant?! Will he leave immediately and not listen to me what I have to say? Would he blame me ? Gosh I was already really sick with excitement. Suddenly I saw him. With a pretty girl . He kissed her, on her lips and waved to her as she left. Why does that hurt to see him like that? Apparently he is over me. He entered the Cafe and saw me immediately. He smiled and came towards me. I didn't get up, stayed seated so he wouldn't see my belly right away. He leaned over to me , hugged me and kissed my cheek .

„Joy" he said smiling and sat across from me.

„Hi!" I smiled back sheepishly.

„Six month Joy!How are you?" he asked me while putting his arms on the table.

I sighed. „Pretty Good. You have a new girlfriend I see?"

„Oh ,you've seen Mia. Yeah, we've only been dating for a few weeks. It took me a long time to banish you from my heart!"

„I see!" I muttered.

„How is Tae? Where is he?" when he asked me that I got a lump in my throat.

„I don't know!" I whispered. Jimin took my hands in his.

„Joy , are you not with him anymore?"

I pulled my hands out of his and swallowed.
„We never really were. I left him the night you last saw me!"

„Joy what's wrong?" he leaned back.

I sighed, now or never.

„Jimin...I have something to tell you..you may not be happy about it!"

„What is it?"

I slowly stood up and stroked over my baby bump. His eyes widened.

„Holy Fuck... you are pregnant? Does Tae know about this?"  I quickly sat back down.

„What if it's not his?" I looked at Jimin questioningly. Waiting for his reaction.

„You mean me?" he laughed. „ Joy, believe me ! It's hundred percent his."

„What do you mean?"

„I am not the father of your Baby as much as I wish I would be!" he said.

„But...!"

„Joy.. I am infertile.. sterile.. I can't make Baby's!"

I was shocked.

„Four Years Jimin! And you never mind to tell me about this important detail? Why?"

„Joy..I .. don't know. Maybe because I was struggling with it myself, or maybe I was afraid you'd leave me for it? Or maybe you wouldn't see me as a ‚ real' man?!"

„Gosh Jimin! I wish you would have told me that from the beginning!" I dug my face into my palms.

„Joy! All this aside, don't you think Tae should know?"

„He'll definitely never speaks a single word to me again. I just ditched him!" the first tears rolled over my cheeks.

„Do you love him?" Jimin asked me.

I let out a sighing laugh and shook my head .
„Yes!" I said softly, not knowing if I would hurt Jimins feelings.

„Tell him!" Jimins response to that surprised me.

He let out a soft laugh.

„Do you know why I broke his nose? Because I could see how my much in Love he was with you. And that got me freaking jealous."

I sniffed my tears back. „It's been six month. For sure he moved on with his life and found someone or he's with his wife."

„Roa?" Jimin laughed. „ believe me she's gone back to America. I was still in touch with her after all what happened on Jeju island. He got divorced. Go to him Joy! You make the first move. He can't do more than reject you. But at least you tried and if you need a good friend.. I'm always there for you. Okay?" Jimin got up and was sitting next to me and he hugged me, kissed my forehead.

„Thank you Jimin." I whispered.

After we Said goodbye I went for a walk along the Han Ricer. I thought about Jimins words and was glad that everything was settled between us. But I was afraid to face Tae.

My phone rang and when I looked at the display I smiled.

„Hi grandma!"

„Hello Joy my little Girl. I just wanted to hear how you are and how things are going! Have you sorted everything out?"

I sighed. „ I just met Jimin Grandma. He can't be the Father of my baby."

I told her from Jimins infertility and that everything between him and me was settled. I told her that I was a little afraid to face Tae.

„For the sake of your Baby, you go through with it and if he rejects you, you know you're not alone. Then you come back and live your life child!"

„I love you Grandma!"

„I know my child. I love you too. And remember, you are doing all this for your Baby. Who knows , maybe everything takes a different way than you think. Take care Joy!"

After the Call with my grandma I felt better. I closed my eyes and breathed in the fresh evening air. I stood by the river for a while, thinking about how best to get Tae to talk to me. I decided to go to the Company the next day. When I turned around and wanted to go back to the Hotel , everything around me disappeared.
I have never felt my heart beating so fast. Adrenaline shot through my body as if I had been on a rollercoaster the third round behind me.

He was suddenly there. I saw him, yes it was definitely him. He was there. Just standing there, looking out at the river. He was wearing a long brown coat , jeans, a scarf around his neck and the light evening breeze made his hair flutter.

„Tae!" I whispered, tears welling up. My body was trembling. „Tae!" I whispered again and again.  Suddenly he turned right in my direction. I just looked over at him. Motionless, I stood there. He smiled and waved, I smiled back...

„TAEHYUNGAHHHHH!" I turned around and saw her. Pretty, young. She walked past me close and waved at him. She went right into his arms. He hugged her and kissed her forehead.

My heart broke into pieces. I held my baby belly and sobbed. It was too late. He moved on.. he found someone.

He put his arms around her shoulder and she hugged his waist. Both smiled and approaching me. He lifted his head and our eyes met for a brief moment. I turned quickly and wiped away my tears.  The worst thing that could happen has happened. I am so stupid. I hated myself so much at that moment. My emotions were going crazy. What could I have expected?! That he would wait for me until I finally found out to whom my heart belongs? Oh God, please just let me disappear.

As the two of them walked pass me , I lifted my head and looked straight into Tae's face . He stopped . Took his arm from the girls shoulder. I cried and held my arms in front of my belly  so he wouldn't see it right away.  He was standing just a few meters far away from me and just looked at me. I turned around and left. Just wanted to leave, I sobbed like a little kid. My steps became faster and I could barely see anything because my tears filled my eyes . I wiped them away again and again.

„I deserve it, I deserve it!" I stammered. Jimin found someone and he has someone too. I am the stupid one of all who thought everything will be fine. Yes I am stupid. I was so angry at myself.

Suddenly someone grabbed my wrist and turned me around. I bumped into Taehyung. He looked at me, I felt the warmth of his body again since month. Smelled his perfume, his breath against my lips...

Neither of us said anything. Then he softly stroked my cheeks with his palm. I squeezed my eyes shut and cried.

„Hi Sweatheart!" he whispered..