Ariel

Today has been a fucking horrendous day. After lunch, I was called out of my lesson to Ms Healey's office because Teresa accused me of verbally insulting her. Telling someone they are stealing someone's boyfriend can't be an insult, especially when it's the truth. Ms Healey didn't agree so I've been banned from speaking to Teresa.

Did she get a ban on speaking to me? Of course not, because she's Teresa; the school's popular girl which is fucking bizarre because I'm sure no one likes her. I don't think even Teresa likes herself. I mean, she must know she's being a bitch. How can you like yourself when you know you're the spawn of Satan?

"Are you watching the movie or are you going to keep huffing like a steam train?" Ryder asks. 

The two of us are laying on my bed with our heads resting on a mountain of pillows, watching a movie I can't remember the name of. I think it's an action movie. Or it's horror. Or sci-fi.

"I'm watching the movie," I huff, refocusing on the people who are now fighting. Why are they fighting? That guy was kissing someone a minute ago. Fuck, I don't know what's going on.

Ryder pauses the movie on the laptop in front of us and looks at me. "Why don't you get your sketchbook out?"

I smile. Ryder knows me better than anyone. I can't keep still, I get distracted and if we watch a movie, I have to do something at the same time. Usually, I draw. Sometimes, I knit or crochet.

"I'm not in the mood. Let's just watch the movie." I press play on the computer.

Someone gets punched, and I imagine punching Teresa like that. I won't. I'm already on the verge of getting suspended and I really need to complete school. My mum was a school drop out and look how she turned out. She's a mess. However, that has less to do with being a school drop out, and more to do with falling for my loser dad and getting pregnant with me. Maybe, I don't need to worry about getting kicked out of school. Instead, I just have to worry about not falling for a loser. Fortunately, the accidental pregnancy part is pretty hard when you only date females.

I turn to Ryder. "Do you worry about all the girls you've fucked? I mean, one of them might be pregnant. They could have already had your baby."

Ryder chokes on the drink he just took a sip of. Spluttering, he sits up and I slap his back which seems to make him choke more.

He shakes his head, puts the drink down on my bedside cabinet and slams his fist into his chest before looking at me with a look of... I'm not sure. Horror? Disgust? Fear? Fuck, does he already have a child? "You already have got a girl pregnant, haven't you?"

"No." Ryder rolls his eyes. "I use protection, and I've not been with that many girls. The ones I have been with are definitely not pregnant."

"You may not know, it could be early days. Some pregnancies can be hidden for like five months, even the whole pregnancy."

"That's pretty rare."

"Maybe, Phoebe is pregnant. According to the latest gossip you and Phoebe hooked up several times. The most recent, being in the school toilets today. Just think, you could be a father in nine months."

"We kissed at a party you dragged me to over a month ago, nothing else happened. And as potent as my sperm is, it can't impregnate girls while still contained inside my balls."

"Thank fuck," I laugh.

Ryder frowns. "El, you know better than anyone not to believe the rumours going around school."

"I know, I was just teasing." I nudge him and smile. "When are we going to kiss? I want to know what these magical kisses everyone is so desperate for are like."

"If you start asking me to have sex with you again, I'm going to leave," Ryder warns.

"I'm over that." I wave my hand dismissively.

Ryder shakes his head. "Of course you are."

"So, I got Kayla's number and she said I can join her, Sydney and Taylor for lunch tomorrow."

"You mean you invited yourself and Kayla went along with it."

"No. Yes. Maybe. I don't know, but Kayla was definitely on board. I like her, she thinks Teresa is as evil as I do."

"Stay away from Teresa, she's caused enough trouble for you. And take it slow with Taylor, I know you like to go all-in but she's going to freak out if you go full El on her."

"I don't know what 'full El' is, but I'm not changing who I am." I pout and cross my arms in front of my chest.

"I don't want you to change. I love you being you. Just be prepared for Taylor to run."

"Like she ran today at lunch while I was defending her honour?"

"I think that was more about you wanting to shout at Teresa."

"She deserved it," I huff. "I noticed you went after her. Taylor that is, not Teresa. You after her? She's not your usual type."

"I don't have a type, I never discriminate, you know that. All females are beautiful to me." Ryder smirks.

"Not what I meant and you know it." I arch an eyebrow.

Ryder stands. "I've got to go. Do you need me to help you get the twins to school in the morning?"

"No. Their dad is going to drop them off. I messaged him when we got back and said mum is ill. He's agreed to drop them off at school then they'll stay at his for a couple of days. He's happy about it."

"You can't keep covering for your mum."

"I'm going to give her a couple of days to get sorted."

Ryder frowns. He gave me a ride to the twins's school then came home with me and helped cooked dinner and get them into bed. My mum didn't come out of her room once. And the food I left outside her bedroom door is still there, completely untouched.

The twins didn't take the news that our mum was too ill to put them to bed very well. In fact, they took it very badly and both of them had a massive tantrum. Four-year-olds want their mum, no matter what, and to be honest even as a seventeen-year-old I want my mum. I don't want to be worrying about her disappearing or locking herself in her bedroom for days.

I understand my mum suffers from bouts of depression but so do lots of people, it's nothing to be ashamed of. She needs to get help, not self-medicate with various types of pills. Every day, I'm scared of returning home or waking up to find her dead, whether it be accidental or on purpose. I don't want to lose my mum.

"Thanks for helping me today, you're amazing." I wrap my arms around Ryder and he hugs me back.

"I'm not amazing," Ryder says quietly. "If you need anything, let me know."

"You are amazing, Ry." I poke him in the chest as I step back. "You can crash here if you like?"

"No. I better get back." He grimaces and stuffs his hand in his pocket.

My heart hurts for Ryder. He drew the short straw when it came to a childhood. His drug dealer mother and older brother are in jail. His dickhead dad left the family years ago. His sister is studying in another city and his other older brother, who is a recovering drug addict, works day and night to support the two of them.

In a bizarre way, I'm grateful for his fucked up upbringing. It's the reason we met and he became my best friend. As much as drugs have ruined our lives they are also what brought us together, and I can't imagine not knowing Ryder. He's the only constant in my life.

Author's Note

Please vote if you're enjoying the story xx