2015 ― Tree Hill, North Carolina

[at the beginning of each chapter will be the letter from logan that lucas read that day]

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Dear Lucas,
I'm not entirely sure what the point of this is... this being me writing this letter. I'm sure that I am the last person you would ever want to hear from. I guess what sparked this was, I was sick and tired of hearing the way our dad and brother speak about you. They talk about you like you don't exist, or like you're not related to us, and it makes me so angry because it's not fair to you. You didn't ask for this. You didn't ask for Dan Scott to be your dad. You didn't ask for the pain that comes with carrying the Scott name in this godforsaken town where everyone knows what our dad did. The stares, the whispers, the secrets, I get it. I feel it too. I know it's different for you since he abandoned you and Karen, but raised me, but... I still feel it. The eyes on me, the whispers about me, everyone assuming I'm just like Nathan and Dan. It's so frustrating because I shouldn't be judged by the sins of my father and brother. You lucked out with Karen and Keith, Luke, even if it doesn't feel like it. Dan Scott isn't the father you want. Keith Scott is the father I wish I had. I love Nathan to death, don't get me wrong, but sometimes I wish I was your twin, just so I didn't have to deal with Dan my entire life.
Sincerely,
Logan S.

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Tonight was Lucas Scott's second game as a Raven, and it went a lot better than his first one. He scored more and got the winning basket. Logan was very proud of him, and she was happy that he came back. However, she did notice that he took the Scott nametag off his jersey. She didn't know if Lucas had started reading her letters, but she remembered in one of them, she wrote that she was sorry for all of the pain he's probably had to carry and endure because of having the Scott last name.

It made her even more proud to see he took the nametag off.

The game was over and Logan had been thinking about going down to the burning boat. There were a few things she wanted to get rid of. The burning boat was a symbolic thing where the citizens of Tree Hill bring things they want to burn, and the symbolism was letting go of what those objects represent.

Logan noticed her Uncle standing with Karen, but the boys hadn't come out of the locker room yet. She took a deep breath and walked over to them, but approached on Keith's side. "Hi, Uncle Keith... hello, Karen," Logan said once she stopped walking. Since Lucas hadn't come out yet, she wanted to get pleasantries out of the way, in case it was awkward.

"Hey, kid. You looked great out there tonight," Keith said as he wrapped an arm around his niece.

"All I did was cheer on the sidelines," Logan said as she shook her head.

"You know, Karen was captain of the Tree Hill Ravens cheerleaders when she was in high school too," Keith said. Logan's eyes lit up as she looked over at Karen.

"Really?" She asked and Karen nodded with a smile on her face. It made her happy to see her daughter happy, and being able to see her cheer for the first time meant everything to Karen.

"You looked great out there, Logan," Karen said and Logan smiled. It was nice for Logan to hear that, since the mother she knows, Deb Scott, is rarely in town because of her job. She didn't know when the last time Deb saw her cheer was. And Dan is all about basketball and Nathan, so she never gets complimented by him.

"Thank you so much, but I'm not the sole captain. I share the role with Brooke. I mainly just help her with choreography, and I do some behind-the-scenes stuff," Logan said.

"It still counts," Karen responded and Logan smiled.

"There's the star... you rock!" Keith said. Logan looked to the side to see Lucas approaching them. He looked at Keith and his mom with a smile on his face. Logan was sure when he got to her, the smile would drop, but it didn't. He was still smiling when he acknowledged her.

"Thanks, Uncle Keith," Lucas said as he hugged him and then he hugged his mom.

"You played really well, Luke... I'm glad you didn't quit," She said as she smiled at him. Lucas nodded as he smiled back.

"Thanks, Logan," He said and she nodded. Lucas was about to say something else, but then they heard a voice.

"Logan!" She turned around to see Nathan was calling her. He didn't look too happy that she was standing with Lucas, but in her defense, she had walked over here to talk to Keith before the team came out from the locker room.

"I'll see you guys later, good game again, Luke," She said as she walked away from them and walked over to nathan. "Yes?" She asked him.

"Are you leaving with me or Roman? You have a car, why are you always getting rides?" Nathan asked and Logan laughed.

"Because sometimes, I don't feel like driving. You're probably going to Peyton's, so I'll leave with Ro," She said and Nathan nodded. He walked away and made his way over to Peyton, while Roman walked out of the locker room and walked over to her. "You played well tonight," She said.

"And you looked good tonight," He teased and Logan rolled her eyes. "But really, thanks. Lucas looked a lot better tonight too," He said and Logan raised an eyebrow.

"Are my ears deceiving me, or did you just give Lucas a compliment?" Logan asked and Roman laughed while shaking his head.

"Look, I'm not buddy-buddy with the guy, and Nathan is my best friend, but I'm not going to hate Lucas just because Nathan does. He claims to have reasons other than your father to dislike him, but I don't have those same reasons. Lucas hasn't done anything to me. Nathan and I have been friends for 11 years, so of course I will respect his feelings and not get buddy-buddy with Lucas, but I have no reason to hate the guy, and I can admit when someone has a good game," Roman said and Logan nodded.

"Wow, Roman, that's so mature of you," Logan said and then she stopped walking right before they walked out of the gym. "Have you seen my brother's best friend Roman Castillo? He looks a bit like you, but he's normally more of an asshole than this," She said and Roman started laughing. "By the way, is June riding with us?" She asked.

"Nah, mom's here, we're finally back to her nights. That was the other reason I had to go back to my dad's and get our stuff," Roman said and Logan nodded. "Do you want to stop at the burning boat?" He asked and Logan nodded.

"Yeah, can we stop at my house first? I have a couple of things I want to get rid of," She said and he nodded.

"Can we stop at mine too?" He asked.

"Mom, Dad, or Josh's?" She asked.

"Dad... he'll be passed out from the alcohol by now, so I can get in and out to get what I want to burn," Roman said and Logan nodded.

"Yeah, let's go."

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After making their stops, Logan and Roman made their way to the burning boat. He noticed that Logan had a bunch of papers in her hands, and he raised an eyebrow. "You're tossing your art?" He asked and Logan shook her head.

"This isn't my art," She said.

"What are they? If you don't mind me asking," Roman said.

"They're letters. I wrote them while at the eating disorder hospital. It was part of my therapeutic process. Writing letters to myself and others. Writing out all the things that made me angry about this disorder, and letting it out of my system if I blamed anybody for it. The hardest part was reading the hateful things I wrote about myself," Logan said as she shook her head.

"Lo," He said and she shook her head as he looked at him.

"It's okay. That's why I want to get rid of them. I don't want anyone to find them, or know they exist, and I don't need a reminder of how life was back then. I know what happened, there's no need to dwell on it," Logan said as she shook her head and tossed the papers into the fire.

"How did that feel?" Roman asked.

"Like a weight lifted off of my shoulder. What about you? What are you burning today?" She asked. Roman set his duffel bag down on the ground and started to pull out various stuffed animals.

"These," He said.

"Why?" Logan asked.

"Because of what they mean... they're from my Dad, and not for the reasons you might be thinking. You know his abuse isn't new. When I was younger before Mom left him, he would always buy me stuffed animals, paired with some heartfelt apology about how much he loves me and he promises he'll never hurt me again. Since I was younger and didn't understand what the cycle of abuse was, I fell for it every time, and thought these animals meant my dad was getting better," He said.

"And now?" Logan asked.

"Now... he doesn't care anymore. I take it and move on. He doesn't apologize or get me anything. Why should I hold onto these when he hasn't changed?" Roman asked.

"What if you take back what they mean?" Logan asked and Roman shook his head.

"I've tried... I really did, but every time I look at them, all I see is him," Roman said and she frowned.

"Ro... why don't you ever fight back?" She asked. Roman looked at the ground and Logan gently grabbed his hand. "I'm sorry... you don't have to answer that, not if you don't want to," She said and Roman gently squeezed her hand to let her know it was okay.

"I tried... once. I did try and fight back. Do you remember freshman year, I came to your house and told you and Nathan I got jumped?" He asked. Logan searched her memory and then her eyes widened.

"Yeah... your eye was swollen shut, your lip was busted and some of your ribs were cracked... That was your dad?" Logan asked as she looked at him. Roman nodded.

"When I fought back, I did get in some good swings, but as always, he had the upper hand. He was hurting June, and I just wanted it to stop. I normally try to step in and take everything so she doesn't have to, but he got to her, so I had to step in. We had a full-on fight. It was bad, Lo. I never fought back again. I hated being in the hospital," He said.

Logan sniffled and wrapped her arms around his torso and hugged him. She was mindful of his side, so she didn't squeeze him too tightly. Roman hugged her back and closed his eyes as they hugged. He normally had no one else to talk to about these things except for June and Josh because they understood. Being able to open up to Logan has helped him feel like he was also lifting a weight off of his chest.

"You deserve better, Ro," Logan whispered.

"Mom and Leo are better... they always have been," Roman whispered back. The two pulled away from their hug and Roman picked up all the stuffed animals. "Goodbye to what used to be a slither of my father's humanity," He said as he threw them into the fire.

"I'm proud of you... you know that?" Logan asked. Roman looked down at her with a smile on his face and he nodded.

"I'm proud of you too, Lo."

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A few days later, Logan was at the spa with her best friends Brooke Davis and Peyton Sawyer. Brooke was getting a wax done, Logan was getting her toes done, and Peyton was sitting in a chair and reading a magazine. Brooke had explained how she went topless in the backseat of Luke's truck after the game, and Whitey caught them.

"So, how's your Lucas quest going?" Peyton asked.

"Fine," She said and then winced as the lady removed one of the wax strips. "Ow!" She exclaimed.

"Let me ask... why are you being so persistent with him? You normally would've moved on by now, and I don't want you playing games with my brother, Brooke," Logan said.

"Look at you being an overprotective sister for a brother you don't even know," Brooke said and Logan rolled her eyes.

"Brooke, not cool," Peyton said and shook her head. "And Logan has a point. You normally do move on by now, so why are you trying so hard with Lucas?" Peyton asked.

"Are you jealous, Peyton?" Brooke asked.

"No," Peyton responded.

"Do you like him?" Brooke asked.

"No. See, there's this guy named Nathan who is also called my boyfriend," Peyton said.

"Also called my twin," Logan said.

"Yeah... ow! Well, maybe I want a boyfriend too, someone reliable for once, steady... without all the drama, anger, and pettiness you and Nathan have," Brooke said. Logan and Brooke both laughed and Peyton reached over and pulled off one of Brooke's wax strips.

"Ow!" Brooke exclaimed.

"Well, Brooke... unless you're serious about Lucas, do not go after him. I may not know him, but he is my brother and I don't want him to get hurt. He's been hurt enough his whole life," Logan said and Brooke sighed.

"Fair enough, okay," She said.

"What about Roman?" Peyton asked.

"What about him?" Logan asked. She was starting to like him, but she wasn't going to tell them that. Seeing a softer side of him has been different, but a good different. She knows why Roman puts on the tough exterior, because of what he goes through with his dad, but it's felt good that he's started to let her in.

"Come on... he's been driving you home after games," Brooke said.

"Yeah, because Nathan always goes with Peyton after games and I want to go straight home and go to bed," Logan said.

"Lo, you have a car... so why don't you just drive?" Peyton asked.

"And do you go straight home?" Brooke asked. Logan answered neither of their questions which made them laugh. "So you don't! Okay, come on, Lo. Everyone has known you and Roman were meant to be together since like... freshman year, so what's the story?" Brooke asked.

"We are friends that are becoming better friends. I've always considered Roman to be Nathan's best friend and a pain in my ass," Logan said.

"And now?" Peyton asked.

"Now he's my friend too, that's all," Logan said.

"Yeah... with benefits," Brooke mumbled, making Peyton laugh. Logan reached over and did the same thing Peyton did earlier. She ripped off one of Brooke's wax strips which made her yelp in pain.

"You bitch."

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The next night, Logan Scott was at home, watching TV in the living room when she heard a knock on the door. She didn't know who it could be. Nathan was upstairs in his room, and she thought maybe it was Roman. But Roman never knocks, he either Facetimeed her or Nathan and told them to open the door, so she wasn't sure who to expect. She paused the show she was watching on Netflix and went to the door.

"Haley?" Logan asked when she opened the door to see Lucas' best friend standing on the other side. Logan didn't know why Haley would be here. She made it clear how she felt when Logan came to Luke's house, and Logan knows that she doesn't interact with Nathan.

"Hi, Logan... is Nathan home?" She asked and Logan raised an eyebrow.

"He might be... why?" Logan asked, repeating the same words Haley said to her when she asked if Lucas was home. Haley recognized that and she sighed.

"I deserved that. Look... I'm sorry for how aggressive I was when you came to Luke's, I just thought...-" Logan cut her off.

"...-You just thought, 'Oh, she's Nathan's twin sister, that means she's a bitch and is only here to hurt or humiliate Lucas,' did I get that right? What are you doing here, Haley?" Logan asked.

"I'm sorry. I am. Lucas told me about your letters," Haley said.

"Don't worry. They aren't angry letters. I didn't cuss him out or threaten his life," Logan said and Haley sighed again. Logan understood Haley felt bad, but she was pissed that Haley immediately judged her, and now she had the audacity to be at her house.

"Logan... I shouldn't have assumed you were there to hurt Lucas. It was wrong and I'm sorry that I did. I don't want to fight with you. I just really need to talk to Nathan," Haley said.

"Why? Based on your assumptions about me, I assume the ones you have about Nathan are much worse," Logan said and Haley frowned.

"You're right. I do have assumptions about Nathan, but here I am willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. Can't you do the same for me?" Haley asked. Logan shrugged as she looked at her.

"Still deciding," She said and then she turned around toward the staircase. "Nathan Scott! Get down here. Someone is here for you!" She yelled.

"Who is it?" He yelled back.

"Why don't you get off your lazy ass and find out yourself!" She yelled back. She heard Nathan groan, which made her laugh, and then heard his feet hit the ground, indicating that he got off his bed. Logan looked at Haley. "He'll be down soon," She said as she walked back to the living room. She didn't unpause the show because she wanted to listen to their conversation.

"Hey," Nathan said when he reached the door.

"Hey... I looked over your English exam and if you really want to learn, I can help you," Haley said. Help him what? Pass? Logan didn't know Nathan was failing. He's not a complete idiot. He knows he has to keep his grades up to play basketball, so she felt like Nathan was up to something.

"That's great... alright," Nathan said.

"I just... I have two conditions. One, Lucas does not find out, okay? Ever," Haley said. That made Logan even more suspicious.

"Alright, fine," Nathan said.

"And number two, you leave him alone," Haley said. Logan knew she was going to have a conversation with Nathan about what that meant when Haley left.

"Well, I don't really have much of a choice, do I?" Nathan asked.

"Okay, um... meet me tomorrow, 7 am, at the Market Street Dock," Haley said.

"Well, what about the tutoring center?" Nathan asked.

"No way. The dock, take it or leave it," She said.

"Okay. 7, then," Nathan said.

"Okay," Haley said.

Logan heard the door close and then Nathan walked into the living room with a triumphant smile on his face. He plopped down on their father's favorite chair. Logan exited out of Netflix, turned off the TV, and then turned to Nathan.

"What the hell was that about?" She asked.

"Nothing, Lo," Nathan said.

"What did she mean by you leave Lucas alone? What are you doing to him?" Logan asked.

"Just a little hazing. Every new person on the team went through it. I did," Nathan said and Logan rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, when you were a freshman. Freshmen go through hazing, not juniors. This is clearly personal, and you need to grow up," Logan snapped and Nathan scoffed.

"So you have one conversation with the guy and you're suddenly buddy-buddy?" Nathan asked and Logan rolled her eyes.

"For your information, asshole, I've had more than one conversation with Lucas, but they weren't long ones, so no, we aren't buddy-buddy," Logan said as she stood up from the couch.

"Where are you going?" Nathan asked.

"To bed... let me tell you something, Nathan. You better not be using that girl to get to Lucas, because if you are... you're a bigger asshole than I thought."

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i love when logan gets feisty, and trust, it won't be the last time.

don't forget to vote/comment. 

xoxo.