2015 ― Tree Hill, North Carolina

Dear Lucas,
Things are getting worse, and I'm running out of excuses to tell people. Nathan knows that something is going on. He's heard me puking, he's seen the wrappers of empty food strung out in the passenger seat of my car and in my room that I keep forgetting to clean. He's onto me. I can't keep coming up with many excuses for throwing up, especially since I don't look physically sick. My Mom noted that I looked skinnier than the last time she saw me, but I played that off by asking, how would she know since she's gone all the time and my weight hasn't changed since she last left. I don't particularly feel good about that, but I don't feel good about a lot of things right now. I don't know how much longer I can hide this. I thought I was good at hiding it, but I'm getting sloppy. Does that mean I secretly want to be caught and forced into getting help? Or do I just watch too many crime shows?
Logan S.

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The next morning, Logan made herself presentable enough before going to Lucas' house. She still felt awful from making herself throw up in the middle of the night, and she had filled one of her tumbler cups with ginger ale to sip on throughout the day because her stomach still felt awful. Logan knocked on the door that led to Lucas' room and he let her inside.

"My Mom's in the kitchen, but I wanted to wait for you to get here," Lucas said and Logan nodded. That's when he noticed her appearance, and even though Logan had tried to pull herself together, she still looked a little disheveled. "Are you alright, Lo?" Lucas asked.

"Yeah, I'm okay... I just didn't sleep well last night, I'll try and take a nap later," She said. Lucas nodded as the two left his room to join Karen in the kitchen. She was sitting at the table and she smiled when she saw them walk in.

"Logan, good morning. Are you joining us for breakfast?" Karen asked and Logan looked at Lucas.

"Mom, I wanted to talk to you and I asked Logan to be here," Lucas said.

"What's wrong?" Karen asked.

"Last night, I saw Dan... He said something, and then Logan said something back, and Dan told me to ask you what really happened back then. Do you know what they're talking about?" Lucas asked. Karen looked at Logan who slowly nodded her head.

"Who knows, it's Dan," Karen said and Logan frowned.

"Mom... Dan said something about how is he the bad guy for helping Logan, and Logan said he's the bad guy for kidnapping her from her biological Mom and forcing her Mom to play along with his game. What are they talking about?" Lucas asked again and Karen sighed, knowing she wasn't going to be able to deflect.

"I'm sorry... I was so angry at him that I spoke without thinking," Logan said and Karen shook her head.

"It's not your fault, Logan," Karen said and then she turned to Lucas. "Luke, you know that I have always had your best interest in mind since day one. You believe that, right?" Karen asked and Lucas nodded.

"Yeah," He said.

"When Deb was able to bring Nathan home from the hospital, a few days after he was born. Dan came to the house and he forced me to give him Logan. She's not Nathan's twin, she's yours. And then he had the nerve to ask for joint custody," Karen said.

"You told me that he never showed up, that he didn't want anything to do with us. My whole life, I had a twin, and I had no idea," Lucas said as he shook his head.

"He didn't show up at first, but once Nathan was born and he moved back to town with Deb, he told me he wanted to help raise you, but he wanted Logan to be raised with Nathan. He threatened to take me to court, knowing that I wouldn't be able to fight him and win. When he asked for joint custody of you, I said no. I couldn't let him take my other child," Karen said.

"And what else?" Lucas asked.

"I didn't trust him and I was already pissed. He was ready to sue for custody, but his lawyer told him since he left me and got another girl pregnant shortly after, his chances weren't great. He left out what happened with Logan. You know what Dan is like, I had to make a decision. I had to do what's best for you, and I knew that someday we'd have this conversation. It was a risk I had to take," Karen said.

"As for my Mom... she told me that she did try to bring me back to Karen, but when my Dad found out, he threatened her too. He threatened to take me and Nathan away and said that she would never see us again if she tried anything. Dan put both of our moms in impossible situations," Logan said. Lucas sighed as he digested all of the information, and then he shook his head and stood up.

"I have to go to school," He said and Karen frowned.

"Lucas," Karen said, but he was already out of the door. Logan turned to Karen.

"I didn't know about the joint custody. I don't think my Mom knew either," Logan said.

"I never blamed Deb because I knew that Dan was probably keeping her silent in some way as well, but hearing that part of it, I understand her. If the situation was reversed, I would've done the same thing to protect you and Lucas," Karen said.

"My Mom said she even wanted to casually drop by the cafe at times to eat, and coincidentally have me with her so that you could see me that way, but she was scared of my Dad finding out because she knew what he would do," Logan said and Karen nodded.

"I had always hoped that you, Nathan, and Lucas would find your way to each other, but this wasn't how I imagined it would happen. The three of you are the only ones who understand how the other feels. Lean on each other, give your father what he never wanted, the three of you united," Karen said. Logan smiled as she leaned over from the chair and wrapped Karen in a hug. Karen was surprised, but she hugged her back, holding her tight. Having her daughter in her arms for the first time since she was three months old was surreal.

"Thank you, Karen, and I'm sorry. I was so mad at my Dad, I forgot Lucas was there and he didn't know, and I just yelled at him before I could think about it," Logan said as she pulled away from their hug. Karen shook her head as she tucked some of Logan's stray hairs from her ponytail behind her ear.

"It's not your fault. I needed to tell Lucas the truth, I couldn't hide it from him forever," She said and Logan nodded as she stood up from the table.

"I should probably get to school too. I'll keep an eye on Luke," Logan said and Karen nodded.

"Thank you. Have a good day."

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Lucas and Nathan Scott along with Roman Castillo were at the River Court together, getting ready for the playoffs. As Roman had told his girlfriend, they had all been working out together, playing basketball together, and helping Lucas get back into the game after his shoulder injury. Lucas and Nathan were starting to bond like brothers. Roman and Lucas got along pretty easily too.

"My legs are dead," Lucas said as he made another shot and limped away from the basket.

"Come on. One more game, man. Let's see what you've got," Nathan said. Lucas took another shot and it bounced off the rim. "Nice shot, Haley," Nathan teased. Roman laughed as he shook his head.

"So, uh... Did Dan talk about me when you and Logan were little?" Lucas asked.

"Well, when we were younger, we used to hear our parents argue about you. We knew you were out there, and I hated that, so I hated you. Lo, on the other hand, loved that she had another brother out there, and she wanted to know you. I just thought what my Dad wanted me to think. It sounds stupid, but it made sense at the time. I guess that's why I've always admired our sister. She never thought what our Dad wanted us to think. She always challenged him," Nathan said.

"My Mom told me... about the whole switched at birth thing," Lucas said. Nathan nodded and Roman could feel the shift between the two of them. "And then she said after Dan took her, he asked for joint custody over me," He said as he shook his head.

"Wow... I didn't see that one coming. Logan not being my twin turned out to be the biggest shock for us all... How are you dealing with it?" Nathan asked.

"I don't know... It's a lot to wrap my head around. And uh, is Logan okay? She came over this morning to help with the talk with my Mom, but, she looked a little disheveled, and I noticed her cheeks looked a little puffier than normal," Lucas said. Roman and Nathan looked at each other and Roman sighed.

"Crap," Roman said as he shook his head.

"Ro, do you know something?" Nathan asked.

"I don't want to break her trust, Nate," Roman said and Nathan sighed as he ran his fingers back through his hair.

"If she relapsed, I need to know," Nathan said.

"Her bulimia?" Lucas asked. Roman and Nathan turned to Lucas, shocked that he knew that, and Lucas could read that on their faces. "In the letters, she wrote me... there's been quite a few of them where she was saying she thinks she has bulimia, and she talks about eating a lot and then making herself throw up," Lucas said.

"What letters?" Nathan asked.

"Starting freshman year, Logan had been writing me letters that she never intended to give to me. Apparently, Keith and Peyton were the only ones who knew about them, and Keith was always encouraging her to give them to me, and then she finally did. After the first game I played where I completely sucked," Lucas said and Nathan laughed a little.

"The secrets in this family are astounding," Nathan said as he laughed more. "Yeah... Logan struggled with bulimia, and she was hospitalized over the summer," He said and then he turned to his best friend. "Roman, did she relapse?" He asked. Roman sighed as he looked at his friend. He didn't like omitting the truth from Nathan, but he also didn't want to betray Logan's trust, she is his girlfriend.

"I think you should talk to your sister."

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Logan Scott made her way to Peyton Sawyer's house. She knew she had to tell her the truth. Peyton and Brooke were the only ones who knew about her eating disorder, whereas Haley knew about her not being Nathan's twin, but didn't know about her eating disorder. Nobody had the full truth yet, and Logan knew she couldn't keep it to herself. It was eating her from the inside.

Logan gently knocked on Peyton's open door as she stood in the doorway. Peyton was lying on her bed and drawing, but she looked up when she heard the knock, and noted Logan's appearance, and she saw she looked like she had been crying.

"Lo? What's wrong? Are you okay? Did Roman do something?" Peyton asked as she sat up. Logan shook her head as Peyton ushered her to come in and sit down with her.

"I relapsed, Peyton," Logan whispered. Peyton's eyes widened and then they were coated with concern.

"Logan... are you okay?" She asked. Logan shook her head as she looked down at her lap.

"Right before the Classics... I found out that I'm not Nathan's twin sister. Dan took me from Karen after Nathan was born, and he threatened my Mom. She tried to take me back to Karen and Dan said if she ever tried that again, he would take me and Nathan and she would never see us again, and I...-I don't know how to handle this. I've been seeing Kiah, Roman knows, but nothing is helping, and I relapsed... the weekend we were at the Classics," Logan rambled out everything and then she started sobbing.

Peyton immediately wrapped her arms around her best friend and pulled her close while she sobbed, her heart breaking with every tear that was shed. Logan clung to her best friend as she cried, and neither of them heard Haley come in. "Peyton, hello...-Logan?" Haley asked. Logan lifted her head and Haley frowned when she saw she was crying.

"Does Haley know?" Peyton asked and Logan nodded.

"Nathan told her the night it happened, like I told Roman," Logan said. Once Haley heard that and knew what they were talking about, she immediately came and sat down on the other side of Logan.

"Are you okay?" Haley asked.

"There's something else," Logan said and she explained to Haley about how her eating disorder developed freshman year and got worse during sophomore year, and then she spent this past summer before their junior year started at an eating disorder hospital getting help, and that she relapsed at the Classics after finding out the truth about what happened when she was a baby. By the end, she was sobbing again, Haley and Peyton wrapped their arms around her and held her as she cried.

"Oh Logan, I'm so sorry," Haley said as they all held onto each other.

"I don't want to go back to the hospital," Logan cried.

"You won't... You won't. Hey, we'll be here to help you. It's just been the eating, right? You haven't been excessively exercising again, have you?" Peyton asked and Logan shook her head.

"Not yet," Logan whispered.

"Okay, good. What can we do to help before it gets to that point?" Haley asked and Logan shrugged as she shook her head.

"I don't know. Please don't tell Roman or Nathan... all they're going to do is worry and it's the playoffs and that's where their focus should be. I'm fine, I'll be fine. I can get it under control," Logan said as she shook her head. Peyton frowned as she ran her fingers through her friend's hair.

"Logan," She whispered and Logan shook her head.

"It's okay... It's okay. Take my mind off of it, Haley, what brought you by?" Logan asked.

"I was going to dump my problems on Peyton, but it seems like you both have enough to worry about," Haley said and Logan shook her head.

"Nonsense. What's going on?" Logan asked.

"Okay, um. I was over at your apartment and Nathan let me borrow his computer to do my English assignment and I came across this creepy porn," Haley said.

"How creepy? Like she-male midgets?" Peyton asked.

"No, like Pamela Anderson wannabes. I'm right to be bothered by this, right? I mean would you be bothered by this if you guys were still together?" Haley asked.

"Well, not really... But our relationship was nothing like yours," Peyton said.

"Because you were having sex," Haley said and Peyton shook her head.

"No, no. Because we weren't in love like the two of you are," Peyton said.

"You know, he says he's totally cool with waiting until I'm ready, but if he's filling up with cyber-sex in the meantime, I'm not going to measure up to that," Haley said.

"Hales, you don't have to compete with anything because you have something that none of those girls have," Logan said.

"What's that?" She asked.

"You have his heart."

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Logan returned home and was lying on her bed, reading one of her books. She felt the bed sink down next to her and when she put her bookmark in place and turned her head, her boyfriend Roman was lying next to her. He looked winded and like he was in a lot of pain. "What happened? Did your Dad hurt you?" Logan asked as she sat up. Roman quickly shook his head and pat her knee.

"No, Logan, don't freak out. Not my Dad, your Dad. Whitey's getting surgery so your Dad is filling in as coach," Roman said and Logan shook her head while rolling her eyes.

"Who the hell signed off on that?" She asked. Roman laughed and then he winced because of how sore his body was. "That brutal?" She asked.

"Yeah... Poor Lucas though," He said.

"You're feeling bad for Lucas?" Logan asked.

"Yeah... Dan was way too hard on us, and Lucas is still recovering from the accident. Half of the things we had to do today couldn't have been good for his shoulder," Roman said and Logan frowned.

"I'm glad the three of you are getting along... I'm sorry you have to suffer under Dan's coaching," Logan said and Roman shook his head.

"It's okay. We'll survive. Come here and cuddle me," Roman said. Logan laughed as she laid back down and laid her head on Roman's shoulder and she gently draped her arm across his torso because she didn't want to hurt him. Roman pulled her in close and leaned down to kiss her forehead. "How are you feeling today, baby?" He whispered. Logan felt her heart-stirring at the pet name, it was the first time he called her one.

"I'm okay. I went to Luke's to help him through the conversation with Karen, and now I think he's trying to deal with it on his own like the rest of us," Logan said and Roman frowned.

"Lucas mentioned that he noticed your cheeks looked puffy when you came to the house this morning," Roman said. Logan's eyes widened as she tilted her head up to look at him. Roman saw the question in her eyes. "No, I didn't tell your brothers, but Nathan kept asking and he's going to ask you," He said.

"You didn't have to lie to Nathan... he's your best friend, Roman, you shouldn't lie to him," She said and Roman shook his head.

"You're right, he is my best friend, and I don't like keeping things from him. But, you're my girlfriend, Logan, and I will always protect you and keep your secrets when you need me to," Roman said. Logan gently kissed his cheek before snuggling into his more. Tucking her head underneath his chin.

"I told Peyton, and then amid my sobbing, Haley came over to talk to Peyton, so I ended up telling Haley about the other side of it too since she only knew the twin thing," Logan said.

"How did they take it?" Roman asked.

"They held me, let me cry, and they said they would help me. I don't want to go back to the hospital, Roman," Logan whispered. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head again while running his fingers along her back.

"You won't. You can beat this. You have all the tools and strength that you need inside of you," Roman whispered back to her. Logan nodded as she closed her eyes. The two of them lay there for what felt like hours and Logan eventually fell asleep. Roman continued to rub her back as she slept, and he liked how peaceful she looked. Every moment they spent together, Roman was starting to fall in love with her, and he knew that Logan was the only one for him.

Nathan poked his head into Logan's room and saw the two of them, Logan snuggled up to Roman's side, asleep, while Roman was running his fingers through her hair and he looked pretty relaxed himself. "Hey, Ro. How long has she been asleep?" Nathan whispered.

"About an hour," Roman responded.

"Is she okay?" Nathan asked and Roman sighed while shaking his head.

"No, but she will be. What's up?" Roman asked.

"Luke's outside. We were thinking about what you told us earlier, we wanted to go to the River Court with Lo," He said. Roman smiled. Earlier when the boys were at the River Court, Roman had noted that even though he wasn't going to give up Logan's secrets, one thing that might help her is the three of them all hanging out together. They're all dealing with this twin switch, and Roman suggested that they should let the situation make them stronger as siblings, the way Logan had always wanted them to be.

The guys agreed.

Roman leaned down and kissed Logan's forehead and started to gently rub her back. "Lo... wake up," He whispered as he gently shook her. Nathan smiled as he watched the two of them and Logan stirred before yawning. Her eyes slowly opened and Roman smiled down at her. "There she is," He said.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I fell asleep?" She asked and Roman nodded.

"It's okay. You needed it. But your brothers are here, they wanna take you to the River Court," He said. Logan slowly sat up and that's when she noticed Nathan in the doorway.

"Hey," She said.

"Hey, you up for it?" Nathan asked. Logan nodded with a smile on her face.

"Just let me run a brush through my hair," She said and Nathan laughed. Roman stood up from her bed as Logan went into the bathroom and brushed through her hair before pulling it back into a ponytail. She was already in sweats so she didn't need to change and then she looked at Roman. "Text me when you get home, okay?" She said and Roman nodded before kissing her forehead.

"You too, when you get back from the River Court," He said. Logan nodded and the two shared a quick kiss before Roman left. When Logan looked at her brother, he was smiling.

"Shut up," Logan said and Nathan laughed.

"I didn't say anything. Let's go."

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The Scott Siblings stood on the River Court and Logan had the basketball in her hands. "I never thought I'd see this day," Logan said as she looked at her brothers. The first time they came to the River Court for Nathan and Lucas' one-on-one game, she never thought they'd be back here, actually getting along with each other.

"What?" Nathan asked.

"All of us... hanging out together... without the two of you trying to rip each other apart," Logan said. Nathan and Lucas laughed before exchanging looks with each other.

"Yeah... I think we've put those days behind us," Lucas said and Nathan nodded.

"So, what's the game?" Logan asked.

"The game we always play. You make a shot, the other gets to ask any question. You miss the shot, you reveal a secret," Nathan said and Logan nodded. That's the game she played with Roman, on the night of the auction because that is the game she and Nathan always played.

Since Logan had the basketball in her hands, her brothers made her go first. She dribbled the ball a couple of times, before lining up her shot from the free-throw line. The ball went in with an easy swish.

"Your question, boys?" Logan said to her brothers.

"If the world was coming to an end, but the one thing that could save it was one free throw from someone on this court, who would you choose to make it, me or Nathan?" Lucas asked, and Nathan laughed a little.

"Already trying to pit me against one or the other?" Logan teased, and Lucas shrugged, making them all laugh. "I would choose Nathan," Logan said, and Nathan smirked while triumphantly putting his hands up.

"Knew it," Nathan said and Logan rolled her eyes.

"I have a reason why... It's because Dad spent years drilling the importance of making free throws into Nathan, and Luke I know your shoulder is a little sore. So if the world was on the line right now, I'd have to go with Nathan." Logan said. Lucas nodded because he understood that.

"I understand, I would pick him too... for now," Lucas said, and Nathan chuckled.

"Okay, Nate. Your question." Logan said.

"If you could go back and change one thing you did... what would it be?" Nathan asked.

"My eating disorder... Freshman and sophomore year were rough years at home with Dan, but I should've turned to more healthy and stable coping mechanisms instead of what I did," Logan said as she passed the ball to Nathan. "Your turn," She said. Nathan lined himself up to make the free throw shot, but then Logan stopped him.

"Wait!" She exclaimed, and Nathan looked at her. "You and Lucas actually play, free throws are too, easy. Nathan, you have to do half-court shots and Lucas because of your shoulder, you can do three-point shots." She said.

The two of them nodded in agreement and Nathan backed up to half-court before lining up his shot, and he still made it. He looked at Logan with a smirk and chuckled. "Questions?"

"When did your relationship with Haley become real to you and not just a ploy to mess with Lucas?" Logan asked. Nathan looked surprised by her question, but she wanted to know, because she knew how it started, but she wanted to know when it got real.

"You remember the night... Oh, wait you weren't at that game," Nathan said.

"The away one where you and Lucas got in a fight and rolled on top of Brooke and hurt her leg?" Logan asked. Nathan laughed because that was the only game Logan wasn't at, but of course, she heard about it the next day. Haley had ended up riding home with Brooke and Peyton and that's ultimately how Haley was able to come into their trio.

Logan said Haley was the last one, no more exceptions.

"Yeah, that one." He said.

"What about it?" Logan asked.

"The day before that, Haley gave me a practice exam to prepare for my test the day of. I got an 81 on the practice exam and I asked Haley to come to the game, she said only if I got higher than an 81 on my actual test, and I got an 84 on the actual test." He said. [A/N: I know this was actually for the father-son game, but the game I'm talking about is mentioned again in season 6 and Nathan tells Haley that he basically played that game for her. He said 'Every basket was a Haley James pickup line,' so that's why I changed that small detail]

"That's great, Nathan!" Logan exclaimed about his grade.

"But anyways, seeing her at that game, it meant a lot to me, especially since it was a further away game and she really did come. And I just... I played that game for her, I didn't want her to think she came all the way out there for no reason. That's when it was real to me." He said.

"That's so sweet and cute," Logan said.

"Yeah, and then after that was Dad's kiss his ass party and you know how well that went." He said, and Logan nodded her head, remembering how Brooke embarrassed her and she made Haley think that Nathan embarrassed her by passing around a note she wrote to him.

"Luke... Your turn," Logan said as she turned to Lucas. He nodded and looked at Nathan.

"Sorry if this gets too deep but... My mom said that when they were in high school, Dan was actually a good person, and I was telling Keith earlier. Do you think what happened in the past is what changed him into who he is now?" Lucas said.

"What do you mean?" Logan asked.

"What if... not only taking you from my mom and I... and then my mom refusing to let him have joint custody of me... what if those were the choices that changed who he was? All the guilt and anger he's probably built up over the last 17 years. Do you think things would've been different if my Mom had agreed to joint custody?" Lucas said. Logan and Nathan looked at each other because that wasn't too far of a stretch, but their situation was a situation of Dan's making.

"You know... you could be right. Obviously, there had to have been some kind of good in Dan if Karen dated him." Logan said.

"Yeah... I would love it if our father was the guy your mom dated in high school, but we can all safely say Dan hasn't been that guy for a long time. As for your question, I think things definitely would've been different if Dad and Karen had joint custody of you." Nathan said, and then he looked at Lucas.

"Yeah, we would've seen you more, and Dan probably wouldn't have kept trying to make me and Nathan deny your existence because we would've grown up with you... partially, according to whatever the custody agreement would've been," Logan said.

"Could've saved us a lot of trouble," Nathan said as he laughed.

"And the twin thing might've come out sooner," Lucas said.

"And Logan could've grown up around both Moms," Nathan said and Logan frowned as she shrugged.

"Too bad things didn't work out that way," She said. The boys nodded and then Nathan turned to Lucas and passed him the ball.

"You're up," Nathan said.

Lucas stood behind the three-point line, dribbling the ball a little and when he lined up the shot, Logan watched as he winced a little after taking it, and the ball hit the rim and bounced off. He wore a sheepish smile on his face, knowing that he now had to tell them a secret.

"What's your secret, Luke?" Logan asked with a smile on her face.

"I'm actually not mad at the way things turned out," Lucas said after a moment of silence.

"Really?" Nathan asked.

"Yeah... I mean, would it have been nice to grow up with you guys if Dan and my Mom had joint custody of me? Sure... but since it didn't happen that way, we got to form our relationships with each other on our own terms, not his, and I think that makes it better," Lucas said. Nathan and Logan smiled at him and nodded in agreement. When he put it like that, it made things sound a little better. Lucas passed the ball back to Logan.

The siblings went in cycles of making shots, missing shots, asking questions, and telling secrets. It took Logan's mind off of her troubles, and she found herself smiling, laughing, and genuinely enjoying herself.

She was hoping they would always be like this.

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we loveeeee scott sibling bonding.

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xoxo.