Shun stared at Sae Joo like there was a sticky gum clinging on his face. He suddenly felt the itch to ask relevant questions about the Prince's weird actions. But no. He shoved the concept away. Maybe the Prince really was testing me. I am his bodyguard, for Heaven's sake! Is there something wrong with him? Heroic, best friend mode on. All those years they were together, he could probably tell anything about his master—even the most trivial one. What is his favorite food? What time does he usually sleep? What is his ideal girl? Those questions. Having said that, a conclusion jumped into his head: Something is boggling him at the moment. He just didn't know how to open the topic. He probably just wants to see me. But why is he suddenly asking for the headband and my father? Let's see.

"Of course, Your Highness. My father would want a visit from you," confirmed Shun, waiting for Sae Joo's response.

The Prince, on the other hand, suddenly shook his head, which the nangdo did not expect.

"Maybe... some other time, Shun. Could we still do that?"

"Uh... Yes. Sure..." There it was. His uvula was holding his tongue not to spill another personal question.

Sae Joo closed his eyes, his whole body traveling into the unknown mysterious universe. He floated while constantly falling into the void, a vacuum. Powerless, with no concept of control, the memories flashed at the back of his mind. The moment Shun had saved his life from the unknown bandits, the battle in Dokdo Island, their first moment together in the cave, the Hwarang selection—everything. It did not happen seamlessly; it was as if he was fired by broken scraps of rusty roofs. It stabbed and severed his organs, but it also elated them. All at the same time. The sensation was clearly vague that we wanted it to end while he was addicted to it. It's not him. It's not him. I trust my best friend. Impossible. It better be not him.

Shun waved at him when he had noticed his master's eyes whirling in hypnosis. "Your Highness, is everything okay?"

Sae Joo shook his head, his eyes blinking involuntarily. "Y-ye-yes. I'm fine. Let's have a walk back to the palace, shall we?"

Under the feeble light of the cream moon, they ambled and relished each other's company. Sae Joo started bringing up happy and lively memories to distract himself from the thoughts of his preposterous detective-acting brain. Shun could not believe how long those moments have been; time scampered along the paths of his consciousness because he was unarguably happy. A pure magnificent moment, the frosty wind bringing all magic back.

When they reached the grand courtyard, Sae Joo insisted on going to his chambers alone. His best friend bid goodbye and went straight back to their barracks. Strolling down the cold bricks, Sae Joo bumped into his father's right hand, the middle-aged man's purple jacket covered with dispersed melted snowflakes.

"Your Highness, what are you doing here in the cold?"

"I was about to ask the same question, Minister Dae Wong."

"This might be a bit insensitive, but I want to ask how you're coping. Are you mad?"

The Prince shrugged like he heard something of low importance. "No. I'm not mad. I was though. Walking in the woods probably helped for my anger to subside. Now, I have to deal with the truth with the utmost rationality. Anger is a normal human emotion after all, isn't it? It disappears eventually. Luckily for me, it didn't cling on me like some sort of a resin," he lied.

In fact, he wanted to erupt in front of him and hurl his wrath all over the places. Take note: all—not a sprinkle, not a piece. There was something holding him back from going berserk though, like a whip tied on the neck of a stallion. He had a ton of reservations. Like romantic love, he had never experienced that kind of emotion before so he did not know how he would handle it. Would it be possible for him to turn into a monster? Or would he remain like a martyr and gulp it all inside like a white-winged archangel because he was naturally good? He was terrified of the possible results. People said that anger could result into either or both of these two tragedies: self-obliteration or mass destruction. Which one was scarier? For all lives' sake—he could not bear to know.

He went back to the minister and asked, "Do you mind if we speak in my chambers? I'm having an intense craving for a hot beverage."

Dae Wong accompanied Sae Joo to his room. On their way, they saw Jung Min came out from the King's chambers. "His Majesty is a man of words," muttered the Prince.

"I'm proud of you, Prince," said Dae Wong.

The Prince turned; his cheeks inflated in skepticism. "What is that for?"

"It occurs to me that you already know the dynamics inside the palace. The basics of how things should work, and how to twist some things for the benefit of the majority."

A scoff spurted from Sae Joo's pale pink lips. For him, Dae Wong's compliment was a pure lie. Hollow words organized from the minister's brain to bolster his emotional health, for he (they) has (have!) always thought that Sae Joo was a futile human being. Weak, expendable garbage. A doll only used for ritual purposes. Hail, hail. Let's shall not fret and bail.

"Do you think I'm ready to ascend the throne?" asked Sae Joo, his eyes ogling—waiting for a positive response. Open your mouth wide and say yes, minister.

"You've done a lot for this kingdom, that—I can't take credit. Done solely by you. Who would've thought that you're the only one who could convince the King to do a humanitarian mission outside the borders? That gives you an edge, Your Highness."

Bingo! Sae Joo expected the indirect answer. One thing that disheartened him was the mere fact that he trusted Dae Wong more than anyone else before. He looked up to him as an idol, like a God. He always had this perception that this man would support him no matter what, that he was different from others. Nonetheless, the council member, so dignified and righteous, ended up like everyone.

Perhaps at the moment, Sae Joo was feeling the rapid, raging desire inside his veins, like a magma fueling a volcano. He was in a desperate search for answers—for himself and his true nature. Some people said that the truth would set one's heart free but why did he feel like he was still in prison, awaiting trial? Frightened by his true color, his genuine form yet to come. He was a pupa sleeping in a dark cocoon, waiting to come out as a mature creature with irreversible features.

Sae Joo followed Jung Min with a cold stare, neglecting Dae Wong's kind words. Soon after, he changed the topic and focused more on his cousin. "Lord Jung Min leaves tomorrow, right?"

"He won't make it to your nuptials."

"That's fine with me. The wedding could push through even without his presence. As long as he makes a safe trip to Balhae, do his mission well, I'm happy with that."

"He's way different compared to his father"

"You think so?" Sae Joo responded timidly, squinting in doubt.

"Yes. I think you also know that, Your Highness. You see, Jung Ho sets the bar on the standard of being evil. He is the exact embodiment of the word from head to toe. As per Jung Min, I don't think he could match the level of wickedness his father possesses. He's just wounded, so deep he couldn't identify who he truly is. Moreover, if you would study Jin Ri, she does crazy things because she could. Creating evil people has either or both of these two recipes: traumatic experiences or evil roots planted upon them. Which of the two is more difficult to overpower—that I don't know."

Raising a mocking eyebrow, Sae Joo smirked at Dae Wong and asked brusquely, "How could you say that they're evil? Is it solely because they do vile things? How vile is vile? If you could discuss the parameters used in drawing your conclusion, I would be so delighted."

The wind became colder, with no hope of rising above absolute zero. Dae Wong sensed a strange vibe surrounding the Prince, something he had seen before. An aura with repulsive charges no one could ever contend. It had to die out from within before someone could infiltrate. He blew the idea away, thinking it was just another episode of the Prince's emotional merry-go-round ride.

"Evil people don't do bad things. They could do good things but for a wicked purpose. If you don't understand what I'm saying, then I guess you have to observe more, Your Highness."

"It's always about the purpose, the driving force of the action. Does that mean you disregard the effects, whether immediate or long time?"

"We don't always have the control for the effects of our actions. Even though how much we try, there would be discrepancies. Nothing happens perfectly. There would be casualties—physically, mentally, or emotionally. It's always about the purpose and the major effects. If you would ask me if I am willing to kill innocent people, one or two, just for the benefit of the rest, I would do it. Would that make me evil? I don't think so. Unfortunately, those are the things Jung Ho cross out regularly whenever he does something reprehensible. Can't you see? His purpose in life is vengeance. He wants to get everything from your father, from you!"

Sae Joo spewed a glance at the minister. "I appreciate your answer, Lord Dae Wong." Yes, I'm not yet ready.

~~•~~

Jung Min returned to his chambers, only to find out his annoying sister sitting on his bed like a princess.

"What are you doing here? Get out."

"Heavens, Orabeoni! Relax. I'm not here to pick a fight with you."

"So, tell me what you want, and get off my bed."

Jin Ri bounced like a miscreant teenage girl escaping over their fences to meet a boy secretly. She paced timidly to the ottoman covered with maroon silk cloth and sat. "I'm going to be a Crown Princess next week, and you're leaving." She submerged her head and looked down at her purple satin slippers.

"Congratulations. I thought you didn't want me to interfere with your marriage. That when the time comes, I'm going to speak with you with full formality and respect. I'm doing exactly what you wanted so what's with the face?"

She raised her head in a jiff and snapped, "How could you be so insensitive? I did say I didn't want you to interfere, but I didn't say that you're not supposed to be a part of it."

Jung Min removed the first layer of his jacket and hung it on a chair. "I have no time for this, Jin Ri. It's getting late. If you want to be pretty on your wedding, you have to sleep early."

She glared at him, a single tear dripping down her carnation cheek. "Do you know why I agreed marrying that imbecile Prince?" Silence dropped; Jung Min frowned.

"—I want to punish him!"

"Punish him? What has he ever done to you? I would understand if it's the reverse—if he would castigate you. You almost had him killed before, and above all, you were a fraud! He trusted you like a true sister; you were his best friend, but you chose to betray him."

"Alright, let's bring up the past, way way back! His family ruined ours. Do you know what I wish all my life? I just wanted a complete, happy family. A mother, a father, and a sibling. Because of what the Seonggols did, that dream has gone good as dead!"

Jung Min scowled, his hands on his waist. He could not believe such disparaging remark. "The Seonggols have nothing to do with your mother's death. Goodness—in that age of yours, you still believe everything our dear father says. Be a woman, Jin Ri, not a moody, unstable, teenage girl. Stop blaming other people of your misery."

"Our father would never do anything to hurt me. He's the only person who has protected me and has been protecting me ever since. What have you done for this family? You might not notice but father truly loves you. Do you know what he says to me whenever you're not around? He praises you to the point that it annoys me already! Naturally, this is my only way to repay a good man's kindness. Believe every single word he says."

"Is that what you truly believe? Eight years ago, you almost died when you staged that grand theatrical show abducting the Prince. You were beaten, remember? Did your scars suddenly leave out of your body, erasing your memory? At that time, I thought maybe you were just a kid, easily swayed by pressure dictated by your parent. What made me gasp in disbelief is the fact that you still carry on living with that pointless, baseless grudge through the years just because of what that old man has instilled to you! Now let me ask you a question. Did the King murder your mother? No! Has the Prince cursed you to be sufficiently miserable? In your dreams! Our father is just using you, and I don't know why you can't see that."

"You dare give me lectures when I know you also hate the Prince down to the bone. You are no different from me. You are jealous of him. Father has told me that when he was born, you never showed your smiling face to everyone—not even to the King whom you loved so dearly. You blamed Sae Joo for what happened to your ghastly, old court lady. What was her name again?" She bit her index finger, her legs crossed like she was preparing for a seductive painting.

A snap on her fingers. "Lady Seo. Her name was Lady Seo, right? Through the years, you continue to hate him more and more. I see it in your eyes, the way you respond whenever the Prince is near, whenever people praise his name for things he has never done. 'Sae Joo-wangja, mansae! Our mighty savior!' Don't you agree?"

Jung Min's face was hard as a brick, gray and blank. Suddenly, like being struck by an earthquake, his face wriggled as he exploded a loud laugh. As the sound, loud as an out-of-tune tuba, encircled the room, Jin Ri stood from her seat and dallied around her brother, her eyes were stupefied like a raven wondering why her target food was still moving.

"Now you realized how funny your words were," she scoffed.

"No," he cackled, ending the vicious laugh. He snorted and straightened his body back to its prim structure. "You don't get it, my dear sister. Do you know the difference between this journey that we go through?"

Jin Ri crossed her arms, pursed her lips.

"I learned my lesson. Yes, I did hate him. Wait a minute, no, no. It was not hatred actually, more like jealousy. You see, sometimes jealousy is easier to overcome because it's shallow. I swallowed all my insecurities and started looking at the brighter side of life. As for hatred, most of the time, it's just irrational. You are an empty, gullible vessel. You could hate someone probably because a loved one hates that person. I, as well, haven't known my mother. I was never completed, but I realized that exerting efforts to hate someone just because I'm not happy with my life is purely stressful. If I were you, I would stop and think of my decisions for a while."

The girl froze on her feet. With the change on the hue of her eyes (paler), it seemed like she was struck by her brother's teaching. She probably took a minute absorbing what he had said. But the main question was: did she accept it?

She closed her eyes and jerked her shoulders, "Family is all that matters. Are you switching sides now? Are you saying that you're in favor of them? They hate you, Orabeoni! They loathe like just like our father, your father."

"They're our family as well. Sae Joo is your cousin, remember? I don't think they hate me like they hate the two of you. And for the record, I am not my father. I will never be," he pledged, eyes as steady as a Buddhist temple.

"It's in your blood. No matter how much you deny it, his blood runs in your veins. You can never escape it."

"We only share the same blood but not the same soul. I have a vision. I'm going to be a better person. I don't need to choose sides. I will be in favor of those who do the right things." He walked smoothly to the door and slid it open. "In all fairness, you don't know how much I've enjoyed this enlightening conversation with you." His dropped voice suggested sincerity, though it was unsure if his sister perceived the same. "I wish you all the best, Jin Ri. From the bottom of my heart, I truly hope you find eternal happiness. The night is getting harsher every minute, so you should go back to your chambers." He gave one solid twist of head, telling his sister to vanish.

Jin Ri traipsed boorishly, and just as when she was about to exit through the door, her lips curved downwards and finished the visit with a stony gaze to her brother. Jung Min closed the door and went straight to his bed, waiting for the day to finish, preparing for the big day tomorrow that would definitely change his life forever.

__________