LEAD－Jeon Jeongguk (The First Lead)

SCENE
DUST OF MEMORIES

KINDERGARTEN. IT WAS the time when Jeongguk was blessed to meet you and Taehee.

When he first entered inside the classroom, it was you, with a smile that melted his heart, who held his hand and made him a part of your world.

Little did you knew, slowly you also became a part of his small world.

Mirae.

For others, it was a name to address you. For him, it was his confidence, his support, his only life line.

That's how he used to feel about you on his days as a child.

He wanted to be your hero who you'd look upto.

"Let's play dollhouse!" Taehee cheered enthusiastically.

Jeongguk started whining when he heard the name of doll house. He hated it with his guts.

"Naw, I hate it!"

Taehee pouted and insisted, saying, "But Ggukie, Mirae wants to play doll house too."

No. You didn't want to and you surely never expressed such desire to her. Hearing your name, Jeongguk stopped his whining.

"Oh," he said with his mouth making an O shape.

His eyes that were once full of boredom sparkled while gazing at you.

"Then let's play!"

He said holding both of your hands and swinging them from side to side. His sudden change of mood made your eye brows fly upwards. But you knew if you agree then what would happen, so you tried to refuse both of your best friends.

"You two play. I should－"

But you never got to finish your sentence because before that Jeongguk held your wrists and made you sit beside him.

"Mirae will sit beside me," he cheered, giving you a toothy smile which you returned gladly with your own.

Taehee clapped. She finally got her friends to play with her.

"Mirae hold my doll properly! Make Taehee kiss Ggukie on his cheeks!"

There again. The sole reason why you never wanted to play doll house. Because it's always you, doing the second lead.

Jeongguk chuckles remembering the days of his childhood spent with both of you.

He reminisces how his feeling to be your hero increased as the trio group start to grow up.

High school.

It was the time when every kid went through puberty, so did Jeongguk. His skin was changing and he didn't like it. When he used to look at you and Taehee, both of you glowed so much that he felt like an ugly potato.

When Taehee used to tease him for his skin, it was always you who used to defend him, saying he was still beautiful no matter how he looked.

That was time when you gradually started to become his hero, without his knowledge.

High school was never free from bullies. The quiet and innocent ones were the ones who got bullied often. That included your tiny trio group. But you never let any so called bully to touch or hurt your friends as long as you were around.

Mirae.

In high school this name was a savior for Jeon Jeongguk.

Jeongguk is sipping on his tea when his eyes trail to his left hand, on the ring he's wearing since his high school days.

It's a ring given by you. The memories are still fresh in his mind.

You banged on the door as hard as you can.

"Jeongguk! Open the door right now!"

Jeongguk's hand itched to touch and hug you. But he couldn't open the door. Not when he's sobbing like a small kid.

"Open the door or I'm going to break it!"

Your scream reached his ears but he wanted to hide his coward self from you.

He dreamed to be your hero. Not a baby who you would babysit.

Your anger reached the sky by then. You knew what happened and on top of that you exactly knew how he's feeling.

"Fine. Don't open. On the count of three, this door will break and then don't come to me when your mother will whip your butt!"

Jeongguk looked up to his door. His eyes were bloodshot red. There's no way you're serious about it and that thought made him relax to continue to hide from you.

"One."

He shrugged and wiped his nose.

"Two."

He felt uneasy. Your voice scared him. He could feel that you weren't joking. The determination to break down the door echoed to his ears with your beautiful voice.

"Thr－"

Before you could say the final number, the door swung open and he stood behind the door hiding himself from you. He took a step forward, lowering his head but still letting you know that he's okay.

You smiled not because he understood you'd actually break down his door but because he opened the door and decided to show himself to you.

The weak and vulnerable side of him.

Jeongguk thought you'd hug him, give him sympathy what he needed right now, even though he'd never accept it.

But he was s wrong. You weren't there to make him feel better. You're there to make everything better.

"Go take your shower and meet me outside, Gguk."

He looked at you with big doe eyes. Your eyes softened when you took notice of his red nose, flushed cheeks and blood shot puffy eyes.

"I don't want to, Mirae. I can't do this."

His voice broke and you found yourself gulping down the lump that's forming in your throat.

"I won't ask you to trust me, Gguk. But whatever happens you'll find me beside you holding your hand, working together as bestfriends do."

"I-I don't know－I can't. I'm so weak－"

Jeongguk wanted to dig a hole and crawl inside, never letting anyone reach his coward self.

But he knew you'd always find him and make him face himself, no matter how hard he tried to escape you.

You held his hand and Jeongguk found himself gaining a small ounce of confidence.

"If you don't fight back today then I'm sorry to say, you failed to be my hero."

Jeongguk cracked a smile and nodded.

"Didn't I fail long ago? Look at me. I don't look charming anymore. Even Taehee teases me."

He said while keeping his head low. He felt ashamed and tired to act brave which he clearly was not.

It was a handkerchief that touched his nose. He looked back to see you standing closer and wiping his nose.

He tried to find any form of disgust in your face. But he only found a calm looking you simply taking care of your friend.

Warmth?

Was it how he could describe his feeling of that moment?

He didn't know. But he knew he felt relief, less tired, more lively.

"Love yourself. If you will be your own hero, your own idol then only you can be my hero."

In that moment, for once in his life, Jeon Jeongguk grabbed a chance to be Mirae's hero. And he was not going to let this chance go.

So as they both walked inside the school and to the Principal's room, Jeongguk was more confident and less scared, when he faced his bullies who crushed his self-esteem.

"I love my face a lot, you rotten tomatoes!"

He spat those words because he wanted to. For once in his life, Jeon Jeongguk realised, he actually loved himself.

He looked at you with his newly found confidence.

"I love myself," he said while cracking a smile.

You nodded, feeling happy, finally letting the tears come out of their shadow.

"That's right, Gguk. There you are, my hero."

My hero.

Jeongguk knew he wasn't her hero. He couldn't be one. Because a hero never need another hero in their life.

That day something changed in him. He started to admire you. Idolize you.

Mirae.

From that day, this name belonged to the person Jeon Jeongguk admired and idolized.

College.

The time when he learned Mirae was a hero for everyone.

Except, herself.

In your own life, you were leading the character of a second lead.

He was there when you broke down, when you couldn't take anymore. He was there when you as he portrayed the girl who loved too much, who cared too much finally reached your limit and slapped that one person you'd never let anyone hurt.

Mirae.

That day, Jeon Jeongguk knew the warmth that always blossomed in his heart for you was something he dreaded to acknowledge.

Jeon Jeongguk.

The man who came into your life as a kid and stayed until he became matured.

Jeongguk sighs, as the memories flow within him. He never thought he'll hear from you ever again. He checks his call list to make sure it is you, not a dream but a reality.

After years, he's about to meet you.

He is happy.

He is angry.

He is scared.

Scared to awaken those sparks he once felt when you left him.

Note:

They gonna meet on the next chapter.