He is such a dork ^^^

Prepare for a broken heart :)

Inspired off one of @ImagineMarvel's one shots :D

In honor of reaching 100k, this one shot is over 3000 words long. 3017, to be exact.

Mwahahahahaha
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You woke, your mind fuzzy and blissful within the morning hours. The few seconds before consciousness fully returns to your senses, the few moments of only existing without thought, without worry. Those were your favorite moments. But they were gone all too soon.

You stretched languidly in Bucky's arms, feeling his soft breath on your ear. You smiled softly and opened your eyes, the metal of his arm around your waist catching you eye. Your hand subconsciously drew patterns in the intricate panels, trailing up and down his forearm.

You turned slowly in his arm, being careful to not wake him up. He looked so serene, so peaceful. He was so beautiful to you in each and every way. You left soft kisses on his cheek, trailing down to his jaw and neck. He groaned, shifting slightly.

He untangled his legs and arms from you, stretching them in all directions as he woke. His eyes opened and looked at you, a dreamy smile on his lips.

"I could wake up like this everyday." He said in a husky voice, his fingers running down your cheekbone.

"I promise you will." You replied. "I won't ever wake you up, unless it's with kisses."

"I'd appreciate that." He joked, rolling over so he hovered over you. "You're beautiful, you know that?"

"You tell me it everyday." You said softly, reaching up and brushing his hair back.

"Of course I do." He said, his voice even softer than yours. You stayed like that for a second just looking at the wonderful man you were lucky enough to call your own.

He eventually left to the bathroom, brushing his teeth and pinning back his hair. You followed close behind, doing the same.

You had one more day with Bucky before you went out on another mission. However, unbenownst to him, you had a slightly different agenda.

The thing was, you had a secret. One only shared between you and Nick Fury. One that was forbidden to fall onto any other's ears.

You were immortal. Just like your father. But, there was always a catch. Since your mother wasn't, your power was limited. After extensive testing, Fury had concluded that you had about four lives.

You already used three.

The first was back in Brooklyn in the late twenties, when a robber ran into a bank you were at, when you were just a child. A small brunette boy about your age stood and began yelling at the robber, telling him to pick on someone his own size, telling him to get goin'. The small, frail blonde boy sat next to him with wide eyes, too scared to say anything.

You had a heroic instinct enstilled in your mind since birth, and when the gunman took his shot, you jumped in front of the bullet, the small piece of metal tearing a hole through your small body. The brunette was shocked, to say the least, and fell to your side while your father apprehended the criminal.

"Why'd you do that, you dummy?" The brunette said, brushing your hair out of your face.

And then you took the first of your last breaths, bleeding out on the floor of a dingy bank.

That was the first time you saved James Barnes.

The second was later, when you were just a teen. You knew of your power then, but not of it's limitations. You thought you were invincible.

In your mind, you had decided to be a guardian to James and Steve, in a way. To you, you had already died for them before, and you weren't going to let that go to waste. If you hadn't been blessed with eternal life (or so you thought), a little girl would have died for them. It would be in vain if they were to do something stupid and be gone at fifteen.

So you befriended them. You became close. You knew each and every dirty secret, each crush, each embarassing moment, each quirk- everything. And they knew everything about you- except for the most important thing. The thing you swore to your father to tell no one. You instead made up a bullshit story about how your father was in contract with the government, and did some shady things. Nothing more, nothing less.

It was a hot summer day, and the three of you had gone down to the beach for a swim. You were all laughing and laying on beach towels on the hot sand.

"I need to use the restroom." Steve said. "I'll be back."

You and Bucky nodded as he left, then you leaned back against the towel and closed your eyes. James turned and propped himself up on his elbow, scanning over your features with his eyes, drinking in the sight of you in a swimsuit.

"Hey doll," He said softly, causing you to peek an eye open at him. He smirked and pressed his lips to your cheek lightly, holding them there for a teasingly short time. "You look good in that suit."

You raised an eyebrow at him. "What are you doin', Barnes?" You had to admit, there had been multiple occasions where you wanted to pull him close and kiss him. Take his collar and kiss the life out of him.

"Im just admirin' my gal." He replied. You scoffed.

"Look at ya, assumin' I'm yours when you haven't even asked me properly." You joked.

"Fine, then. Miss (Y/N) (Y/L/N), will you do me the honor of being mine?"

"I don't know." You teased. "Maybe. I'm not sure."

Bucky growled in the back of his throat. "Maybe I'll make you sure." He said huskily, then attacked your sides, the only ticklish spot on your body. You shrieked with laughter, squirming under his grip.

"Stop! Stop! St-"

He cut off your cries of mercy by pushing his lips on yours. You sighed and ran you fingers through his hair. His hand gripped onto your hip and his chest rose and fell against yours. He was the first to pull away, a lazy smile on his lips.

"You sure yet?" He smirked.

"I'm damn well sure, you ass." You laughed. "Where is Steve?" You realized how long he had been gone.

"Hell if I know." He replied, rolling back onto his towel. You sat up and leaned over to give his lips a quick peck, then stood and stretched.

"I'll go get him." You said, walking towards the outdoor bathrooms. You knocked on the door. "Steve? What's takin' you so damn long?!"

"(Y-Y/N)." He whimpered. You eyes grew wide and you burst into the restroom, not caring if there were men in there.

You were met with your fragile friend being held with a knife against his neck. The man holding him looked like men you've dealt with before. Men who wanted you and your father dead.

HYDRA.

"You let him go." You seethed.

"An eye for an eye." The man bargained, his German accent strong. You nodded, and Steve was released, then clambered over to you. You kept your eyes on the man as you spoke to Steve.

"You get out of here and run. Get Bucky and run. Tell him it's my father. Don't you let him in here. Go." You said in an authoritative tone.

"But-"

"Go!" You shout, causing Steve to jump. He brushed his hand against yours, then turned and ran, just as you told him to. The agent laughed at you, the dark chuckle erupting from his chest.

There was a moment of silence, then you pounced. You fist flew at his face and you kicked at his chest and stomach, just as your father had taught you. The man panicked and dug his knife into your side, making you cry out in pain.

"Dumbass!" You shouted, laughing as you fell to the floor. "I'll be gone, but I'll come back. You, on the other hand, have an answer to give to your boss, now, don't ya?"

The agent looked at you with wide eyes. "No. I'll bring you with me-"

"With a beach full of people outside? No, no, my friend. You're dead, you asshole." You laughed again, a trail of blood dripping from the corner of your lips. You had felt the sting of death before, but it only seemed even more painful now.

The man looked at you with fury, kick your ribs once before unlatching the cyanide tooth from his gums and biting down, his breathing becoming labored, then stopping completely. You spit in his direction and layed down completely. Your breathing was uneven, and you feel yourself slipping.

Meanwhile, Steve was dragging Bucky away from the bathroom.

"She said to run!" The small boy shouted, his frail, teenage body unable to hold his much bigger friend back.

"I can't leave her!" Bucky turned and shouted in Steve's face, with so much venom in his voice that Steve was actually scared for a moment.

Steve let go of Bucky's wrist and watched emotionlessly as his second best friend walked to the bathroom door, opened it slowly, then sobbed loudly before stumbling in.

Bucky collapsed next to your body, loud cries echoing in the tile room. He cradled you close, trying to ignore how your blood was staining his hands, trying to keep his eyes from looking into your lifeless ones.

"No!" He shouted. "No! Come back!"

Steve eventually coaxed him away. They went to the police station, told them what happened, then were rushed back to the crime scene, only to find one body and a pool of blood.

After the second incident, you changed your hair color, name, and lifestyle. You could no longer protect your Bucky Barnes, not if you wanted to keep your secret. Not if you wanted to keep him safe.

You were in Europe then, in 1943. You had already stopped aging, and would forever look like you were 23. You stood side by side with Agent Margaret Carter, and was one of the few women fighting on the battlefield.

You were Agent Evelyn Vürtzen, a supposed German woman with valuable intel on HYDRA'S battle strategies. You were thought to be a spy and sharp shooter, with training from Schmidt himself.

Even with a new life, a new name, a new identity, James still found a way to act like a total dumbass and almost get himself killed.

That's when the third incident happened.

You were fighting on the front lines, the regime you were stuck with was dwindling quickly. The 107th was called in as backup, since your men were becoming outnumbered. You didn't expect to see Bucky himself calling out orders and battle plans to him men.

You tried to keep your head low, to keep from exposing yourself, but when a blast threw you right next to him, you knew the game was over. He stood and took your shoulders, his men running past the two of you.

"(Y/N)? What the hell?" He asked, looking into your eyes.

"James," you choked out, "I-I'm so sorr-"

You felt a searing pain in your back, right where a bullet cracked into your spine. You jerked your head back as the pain spread through your back.

"Don't you fucking do this again!" James yelled, holding you in his arms.

"I'm sorry." You mused. "I love you." And you took a final breath for the third time. James fell to his knees with you still in his arms, his eyes glossed over and his mind foggy. He didn't know how to feel. He didn't know what to do.

The woman he loved, the fifteen year old girl he held so many years ago, taken from him just as she was before.

So he sat and stared at your lifeless body, trying to piece everything together, trying to figure out why.

But he was ripped away before life came back to you. He was taken, along with most of his regime, and he was pumped full of chemicals and serums in an attempt to recreate the same one used in Project Rebirth. And he didn't even put up a fight. He couldn't put up a fight.

You awoke and returned to camp, got sent home due to injuries, and cried. Cried until you had no more tears to give.

Decades passed, you joined S.H.E.I.L.D once Peggy and Howard no longer worked there, you told Nick about your power, and you were soon reunited with Steve and Bucky, once again making up an elaborate story as to how you were still alive.

This time, the story was that HYDRA took you in the bathroom that one day, experimented on you, then you escaped to the army. They got you again when James saw you on the battle field, then froze you like they had done to Bucky. You escaped again, and the rest was history.

It hurt to lie to them, but it was better If they didn't know. It would keep them from getting themselves killed.

"Bucky?" You asked, hugging him from behind as he made breakfast for the two of you.

"Yes, doll?" He responded.

"I love you."

He turned and sighed.

"I love you, too." He leaned down and captured your lips in his in a short and sweet kiss, the ones you cherished with every fibre of your being.

"You ready for tomorrow?" You asked, leaning your head on his chest.

"I guess. Never can really be ready, you know?"

You sighed. "You have no idea."

The day ended much faster than you anticipated. It seemed like a minute had passed, and you were already on the helicopter, landing outside of the HYDRA base, the Avengers by your side.

"This is an in and out mission." Steve said. "Let's make this quick."

"Yeah I've got a reservation at six." Tony commented.

You all exited the chopper and slowly made your way to the entrance. Not a single shot had been fired, raising your suspicions. Steve kicked down the door, but it was still silent.

You went in first, checking the room to find it empty.

"Nobody's here." You said.

"Must have evacuated before we landed." Bucky said. Steve nodded.

"Okay, Natasha, go get the files with Bucky, the rest of us will take a look around." Steve ordered. Bucky and Nat nodded, making their way down a corridor. Bucky and Nat always were retrieving information, with Nat's hacking skills and Bucky's knowledge of almost every password HYDRA has, they were an unstoppable duo.

You followed the temple down the opposite hallway, slowly. There was a small side room to the right, and the team just walked past it. You, however stopped and looked at it.

"We have a door here." You said.

"It's a janitors closet, (Y/N)." Tony deadpanned.

"I'm going to check it out."

They all mumbled their okay, then continued down the hall. You opened the door to find a supply closet, just as Tony had thought. You were about to leave when something caught your eye. A dim, red flash could be seen behind the paper towels.

You moved the package and found a switch, and flipped it. The wall beside the shelves slid open, and you quickly pressed yourself against the wall. You drew your gun and cautiously poked your head around the corner, only to have a flurry of bullets barely miss your head.

You took a deep breath, then jumped out and began mowing down agent after agent. It was easy, really, taking them down. Too easy.

"We have some targets!" You shout into the earpeice.

"We're coming!" Steve shouted.

"No! They're going down real easy." You shot the last one, only to reveal another flashing light behind him. You got closer, your eyes widening in realization.

"We've got a bomb." You said. "Every out! We've got a bomb! Half a minute at most!"

As if on cue, more agents stormed the room, trying to take you down. You began picking them off easily, inching your way to the door.

Bucky and Natasha looked at each other in fear, then ripped the hard drive from its port in one of HYDRA'S computers, making a beeline for the exit. They were the first ones out.

Steve, Tony, Clint, Wanda- Bruce still gone and Thor in Asgard- all raced towards the exit as well, making it out shortly after Bucky and Nat. They all stood a safe distance away.

"(Y/N)! Where the hell are you!" Bucky yelled into his earpeice.

"Coming!" You chirp sarcastically, taking down the final HYDRA agent. You Glace at the bomb- ten seconds.

In a full sprint, you ran out of the building, making it into fresh air before the explosion happened. Bucky sighed and smiled at you. You smiled back and chuckled as you began to walk towards him.

"See? I'm fi-"

BOOM

The building blew up, igniting all of the hidden dynamite and gunpowder in the walls. The explosion was much bigger than expected, and tossed the Avengers backwards.

Bucky sat up, groggy and disoriented. He stood and leaned on a tree, staring at the burning building.

Then he saw you.

Charred and bleeding, facedown in the grass.

"(Y-Y/N)?" He stuttered, taking labored steps towards you. A sob escaped his lips when he saw the hole in your back, when he saw your lifeless eyes.

"No, doll." He said softly. "No, you're fine. We're all okay." He picked up your body and carried you back to the other heroes, not looking at any of them as he boarded the chopper.

He didn't learn of the truth until after the funeral. He didn't know of how you willingly gave up your few lives for him and Steve. He didn't know he could cry for so long in his life.

He didn't know what real pain felt like until then.