Five year later

As the curtain fell shut Saiar knew she had done wrong. Disobeying her father in front of his advisers was ill-advised for even the highest of feiries. Cascading like a over-zealous waterfall, the words tumbled over each other, eager to be heard, eager to be felt. Saiar had watched each word hit her father like an arrow, and yet still she had not stopped. She walked quickly across her private quarters and flung herself onto her bed.

Why has he forced me into such a corner? He cannot possibly expect me to..?

Stubbornness and pride held the tears at bay, instead Saiar screamed into her silk pillow allowing the feathers to absorb the sound.

A voice at the door drew Saiar's attention and she called out her permission. Kini—an old feirie who had seen just as many seasons as her father—stepped lightly through the entrance. Her short, plump figure burst through the door, advisor robes flapping behind her like wings..

Saiar sat, straightened her fitted dress. It was her favourite dress; a light sky blue with a wonderful pattern of intertwined vines and leaves. Skylarks flew along the sleeves all the way to her elbow where they dissipated into clouds and stars. Like most afire dresses it was open at the back so that her wings could rest and move easily. The only expections for this style were the mourning dresses, winter attire and the traditional marriage dress. At the thought of marriage Saiar's breath skipped and she felt heat rise in her cheeks.

"Would you care to explain?" Kini asked lightly, hands on her hips. Her bright eyes were scrunched because of her frown.

"There is nothing to explain."

"Saiar, how long until you realize you cannot lie to me." Saiar hugged her legs tight against her chest. She was not ready for another interrogation, not yet. "Saiar? I think you owe your father an apology, and me an explanation."

"An apology?" Saiar bit back her tongue; she had never spoken to anyone with that much mockery or venom.

"What has become of you?" Kini stepped forward, still frowning with concern. "This behavior is...where did you learn such bad habits? Certainly not from me. Is it Elori? Your brothers? It better not be or they will hear my wrath."

Saiar bit her tongue, her chin at her chest. Kini's soft touch upon her back made her jump. Not because it was cold or unwelcome, but because she had expected Kini to be angrier for longer.

Her withdrawn wings shuddered under her skin, asking to be released, but Saiar didn't want their light, comfortingtouch against her skin, nor did she want Kini's pity. It was not often that a Feirie withdrew her wings unless she felt it necessary and Saiar was so angry that she could not help it. Pressure behind her eyes forced tears out as memories of better times flooded her mind. Kini had been nursemaid to her older brothers and sisters for the first years of their youth and was now assigned to Saiar.

"Come child," Kini pulled Saiar into a tight embrace and held her there until her tears had evaporated. "Now tell me, what is the matter? And don't tell me nothing because I know you better than that."

Wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, Saiar shook her head. "What is the point of arguing further? He has made his decision and nothing—not even an adviser—is going to change his mind."

"He might. You are after all his daughter."

"And he has plenty of others. And he...he...he doesn't love me as much as them. Miara is his pride and joy, and Elori is his heart. He has no space for another daughter."

"Saiar!" Kini's voice was full of dismay. "For the God's, and for Raphar's sake, do not think or say such things. Look at me. Saiar, look at me. Your father loves you, I swear it on Raphar's name."

"He loves me so much that he would rather me become a priestess, doomed to a covenant that binds me to a solitary life? One without love and family! One that I do not wish!"

"Saiar!" Kini sighed but did not make any attempt to argue or disprove the point.

Saiar blinked back the new tears. "I cannot. I will not live such a life! I would die before I obey such an order! I care not if my father has ordered me to do so! I will refuse him with every fibre of my existence until there is nothing left of me if I have to." Saiar was trembling. Tears rolled down her cheeks again, blurring her vision, however, she could see Kini's usually pink cheeks were now a bright red, not even her freckles were visible.

"I have never taught you such manners, young one, but I have tried to reach out and talk reason with you and I have failed. This sort of behaviour makes me agree with your father's suggestion, and a suggestion is all it is."

"His suggestions are the same as laws," Saiar shouted.

"That's not true. You will come to your senses and only then will I try help you." Kini said gruffly.

Tears tumbled one after the other; landing on her bed and legs. When she wiped them away Kini was no longer there. The large room was empty save for her. Stepping off the bed she came to the wall of bark—a wall that connected the room with the tree it was attached to. She touched it gently, releasing just a little of her Will. The bark slowly changed to a mirror. Saiar's blue eyes stared at her. They were red and her lips swollen.

How can I become a priestess? I am worthy of more. I am capable of more. I love Raphar and the other Gods, I just cannot dedicate my whole life to them...

Studying her plain features she ran her finger along her oval face and thin frame. She was nothing like her brothers and sisters. They were tall and strong. All the royal children had their mother's fair hair. Saiar's was the lightest of all just like her mother's. Her aqua eyes slanted just like any Feirie but a tinge of green linked her to King Odin. Often people commented on the similarity between the two even though she could not see it. His eyes were cold and stern. They held a power above all others. They could draw the truth out of a man and destroy his life at the same time.

Hers held no such power; she could never be like her father or her mother. Both such strong, admiral figures in Roshale and all the other feirie cities.

I am no more worthy to be a princess of the feiries than I am a priestess of the Gods.

She turned to look at her lavish room, full of extravagant cushions and ornaments from all over Hanarah. She deserved no such lifestyle. She was too weak to lead her people to greatness and too shy to be the focus of so many eyes.

I am a coward and a fake and I don't belong here.

She collapsed on the floor and allowed the rest of the tears to pour out. Her eyes burned and her throat was dry, but still the tears came. How long until the well ran dry? How long would she allow herself to feel such misery and pity. Distracting herself was easy, she walked to the map that hung on her wall and focused on its lines and colours. Garden had given it to her for one of her birthdays—a gift for her adventures he had said.

His future is certain. Father allowed him to pursue his passion why not mine?

Gariden was a scholar, he spent his time with the professors and philosophers of the knowledge tombs and had asked their father if he could work as one of them too. Naturally, father agreed, for he could not deny his son of his natural calling. A small golden dot caught Saiar's eye on the map, close to the blue star that symbolized Roshale.

Baedin.

She had always wanted to visit the small city; it was famous for its superb metal smiths, which created most of the warrior's armour and weapons.

I have always wanted to travel. Maybe now is my chance.

As slow as a child creeping into the kitchen to steal a pie, Saiar's wings came out, large like her father's and almost double her height with tapered points at the top. Plain silver with dark grey veins, they were simple compared to her mother's and sister's. But hers had a shimmer to them like her father's did. His golden wings caught any light and were often talked about in bard songs as the second sun.

Saiar thought that she would love to have a song about her wings but knew they were not as special as her father's. Sighing she turned away from the large map and searched for her traveling pack.