CHAPTER THIRTEEN
in the face of fear

                           𖦹 ⋆｡˚⋆ฺ ⋆｡˚⋆ฺ˚⋆˚ 𖦹

  THE MERMAID TOSSES HER HAIR, golden and glittering under the moonlight, her movements inching over the stained glass window at an unhurried pace. She drags a pearly comb through it with a flourish, one slender eye cranked open to peer down at the shivering figure curled up in the baths below her. Her tittering Mermish lyrics seem to suspire around the room, a whispering ballad to usher away the silence that had blanketed the tiles before. Her language is extremely old-fashioned considering how long ago she must've been manufactured, the snippets that Cove can make out sounding nothing like the modern Mermish she's become accustomed to in her journeys through the ocean.

Thinking back on those memories causes bile to pierce her throat. She pushes them to the back of her mind and tries her hardest to focus on something else.

Bubbles foam up against the marble lip of the wide bath, sweet smelling and beautifully soft against her skin. A few long fingers of moonlight curl in through the stained glass and the restless mermaid that inhabits it, the darkness only splintered by those few strands of pale luminescence. Cove sits with her knees sealed tight to her chest and her sudsy cheek smushed atop the left one, the steam which snakes off the water leaving her flyaways to frizz up more than usual.

It had been a few days since the incident. Her concerns were raised regarding the rapidly approaching festival of Imbolc — the pagan Wheel of the Year would begin afresh on February first and Cove would forcibly change back into a seal for the duration of the sabbath, so it had dawned on her that she'd have to pluck up the courage to transform sooner rather than later in preparation for that day.

Her skin was already beginning to dry up, so it was really only a matter of time before she took the plunge. She hadn't found it in herself to try until now.

Remus had given her the password to the Prefect's bathroom in honour of her privacy, urging her to face her fears and challenge the water head on, even if it wasn't from a totally natural source just yet. Baby steps and all.

She sinks into the bubbles until she's submerged up to her cheekbones, taking in the scent of calendula and rose as her breathing adapts to her underwater environment. Her eyes flutter closed while the warmth spreads over her flesh, her head fully dipping under when she grows accustomed to the sensation.

Her throat begins to constrict. The scalding, too-hot water suddenly feels cool against her flesh, raising prickly goosebumps and making the hair on her forearms stand on end.

Cove sits back up with a gasp, hands creeping to seize her seashell necklace in distress. It buzzes against her skin with an unusual surge of energy, shimmering betwixt her thumb and index finger. The opulent pearls threaded onto the chain are laden with droplets, crystalline and icy despite the feverish heat of the water surrounding her. It's as if the effect of her thick skin is irrelevant when a shiver courses through her, a bloodletting chill scampering down her spine at the sloshing of the bath.

No, it can't be the temperature. She's just out of her comfort zone. The water hardly feels like a friend to her anymore.

Her head turns to the side, seeking out the comfort of her real, tangible friends who are posted near the bath to keep an eye on her. Mary's caramel curls are pulled up into an updo to reveal an expression of concern, secured in place by a dusty pink scarf that matches the soft pyjama set she has on. On the other hand, Fallon is a mess of yesterday's smudged makeup, tangled bed head and a graphic t-shirt that's far too big for her, her tartan pyjama bottoms sporting several sewn up holes from how worn they truly are.

Fallon watches her apprehensively. "Are you ready?" she asks, her voice slow and overly cautious.

Cove isn't sure if she ever will be, really. She has a nagging feeling that if she accepts the pull of her seal form without putting up a fight, there's only a slim possibility of her coming back from it. Instead of saying any of this to her friends, she can only bring herself to nod mutely and extend her hands.

Her sealskin lies in a fluffy heap on the tiles by Fallon, flowing out of her tatty old tote bag and sprawling across the ground. The fur is thick and the tawny speckles are the same colour as Cove's curls, the colours beginning to darken as her hair does in the water. She side eyes the skin with apprehension; her arms and mind beckon for it, though her heart is screaming at her to leave it be. Cove has to refrain from screwing her eyes shut and dunking her head back under.

At the first brush of Fallon's warm fingertips over her sealskin, she shivers. It sprouts goosebumps all across her skin and the seal spirit that rests dormant inside of her begins thrashing wildly, protesting the foreign touch with a raucous roar that makes her ears pop. The nipping of a bloody maw clenches around her very soul, any humane niceties fading away under the burdening feeling that someone has their fingers digging into her lifeline. All she can feel is Fallon's touch, her unwanted touch.

She can only describe it as something... visceral. A full body lurch fussing over what's hers. If she were to wake up from whatever primal instincts are muddling her mind, Cove would realise that she trusts Fallon as her best friend and would allow for herself to just relax, to accept that she's only trying to hand it over in a simple show of good manners. In reality, the only thing that goes racing through her brain is the repeated chanting of mine, mine, mine.

Cove snatches the skin off of her before she can really register what she's doing, teeth bared in a sneer. The aggression almost feels natural upon her face but it makes a bolt of regret bullet through her heart. She blinks away the anger and shoots Fallon an apologetic look before taking a deep breath, holding it in her hands for a moment longer before daring to pull it over her head. Over her shoulders, over her knees. Fallon and Mary watch with bated breath.

The transformation feels peculiar. Where they usually soften the live wires in her temperament, she feels disoriented and lost. She typically sinks into her seal form with the fleeting embrace of an old friend. This feels like a reunion with an acquaintance gone sour, at best. A tense, tight-lipped greeting shared between two forlorn souls as they drift past one another. It heals as successfully as it hurts.

Fallon and Mary share a concerned look when she dips under the water, her flipper splashing against the surface as she dives down deeper. The bubbles froth with newfound life, puffing up and spilling over onto the tiles until their pyjamas are dampened at the knee.

  For a minute it seems like she's not planning to rise back up. She curls into herself at the bottom of the bath, the occasional burst of bubbles signifying a slow breathing pattern as her flippers audibly scrape against the marble. They hesitantly peer over the side to try and see if she's still doing alright.

  Cove surfaces with a splash. She doesn't seem to notice that she's given the two of them a fright at all. No, her big black eyes only blink up at her friends innocently, swimming with an unsettling gleam of humanity mixed in with pure animal curiosity.

  She emits a low whine that tugs on their heartstrings, her cries transforming into disgruntled barks that reverberate around the bathroom. Her whiskers twitch and her nostrils  flare to usher away all the intrusive bubbles that rush to disrupt her breathing. She sneezes, eyes drooping to blink away her surprise.

   The sealskin slips off of her head seamlessly. Her face pokes out with a rosy flush adorning the apples of her cheeks, jaw clicking back into place as she rolls her shoulder to get back into that mortal feeling. Her legs kick out of the water in a jerky reflex before settling. A tense knot forms between her furrowed brows.

   Her human skin constricts over her skeleton before finally resting comfortably, features aligning in all the right junctions to match the same Cove they'd seen mere moments ago. The chilly air nips at her exposed collarbones and the boiling water seems to be cooling at an alarming rate. Her curls are completely soaked by now, peeling from her temples to frizz up and blossom around the frown on her face. Her eyes remain downcast.

  "Vee?" Fallon whispers, the simple nickname laced with a trembling concern that makes her heart ache.

   Cove's shoulders begin to shake with silent sobs, disrupting the still night. Her sealskin is shrugged down around her shoulders in a weak, lukewarm embrace that has her flesh aflame with a conflicted fear.

"Oh, no," Mary murmurs, drawing her close until her own pyjamas are soaked by bubbles. Her thumb rubs soothing circles on Cove's shoulder. "Don't cry, pretty girl. You're alright."

An artificial splash resounds around the bathroom, the glass of the window warping and the panes twisting until the figure inside is peering down over her rock. The mermaid looks on with a concerned glitter adorning her plain expression, murmuring away in her ancient tongue as consolation.

The tittering mermaid, the sobbing selkie. Both made of glass and poised to shatter at any given time, fragile in two different yet very real senses. Her tears mix into the redolent water, two worlds colliding in a concoction of salt and sweetness that seems to effervesce in the moonlight. Her crying begin to echo.

     Why her? Why her?

    The mantra is repetitive. Annoying. The comforting hands of her friends feel numb upon her arms and shoulders as they tremor with her own grief. Her sharp nails claw into her head as she tries to block out the ringing in her mind, that fizzing static crescendoing until it's more like the roaring of a gale in her ears.

    Why her. . .

author's note!

yikes this was an unedited and uneventful one 🥳🥳 it's what i do best what can i say people

it has been a hot minute how are we all doinnggggg ⁉️⁉️ i've missed cove but school has been throttling me so i've not had the chance to write her in a while, i hope this was enough to sustain yous for a while longer loool